Re: defined almost entirely by what it does not say.
A thumbs-up for the Tom Lehrer reference.
Posts by Jeffrey Nonken
1208 publicly visible posts • joined 3 Sep 2007
Spyware slinger NSO to Facebook: Pretty funny you're suing us in California when we have no US presence and use no American IT services...
Audiophiles have really taken to the warm digital tone of streaming music
Cloudflare family-friendly DNS service flubs first filtering foray: Vital LGBTQ, sex-ed sites blocked 'by mistake'
Google reveals the wheels almost literally fell off one of its cloudy server racks
We regret to inform you there are severe delays on the token ring due to IT nerds blasting each other to bloody chunks
Monday 9th March 2020 18:19 GMT
Happened to us, too
We had a 10base2 network at the time. One day one of the main IT guys was asking me if I knew something that would start flooding the whole network starting at about 12:15 every day and would end around 1:00 or so. I didn't make the connection, but one of my fellow Doomers caught on right away. "That sounds like us, playing Doom." Uh... oh, yeah. That.
Apparently the first iteration of Doom I used broadcast packets, so it was flooding the local network and pretty much shutting down our connection to our offsite offices, which ran at a considerably slower data rate.
Once we 'fessed up, Weldon simply told us to try not playing it. Problem went away. We got around it by stringing our own wires around the cubie farm and switching over during lunch; we'd avoid tanking the main network by the simple expedient of using our own.
iD software actually patched the problem away reasonably quickly, but nobody but a few of us peons were interested in getting Doom running, and we had a solution of sorts; so we used our ad-hoc solution for a few months before we got permission to test on the main network again. Weldon watched the network stats while we played and declared it good, so we were free to pursue our mayhem on the main network after that.
Grab a towel and pour yourself a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster because The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is 42
Monday 9th March 2020 16:42 GMT
Re: fun facts
"Ford Prefect is Ford Escort (makes sense since we never saw the Prefect, here)"
Nor did we ever see it here in America, and hardly anybody I know got the joke. Including me. Until a friend who'd spent some time stationed overseas explained the joke. I've passed it along when I can.
... But we still seem to have gotten the English version instead of the American version. :)
Disk stuck in the drive? Don't dilly-Dali – get IT on the case!
Friday 6th March 2020 20:36 GMT
I frequently used to put a laptop on a narrow stretch of counter between the stove and the 'fridge, turned towards me so I could watch movies while I was cooking, which left the front left corner sitting on a burner. One day I turned on the wrong burner on High...
Fortunately I was right there and smelled the burning plastic right away. The case was melted and scorched on the bottom of one corner, but there was no other damage. I gave the laptop away to a friend, still working, two years later. Of course, I had to explain where the damage came from, much to his amusement.
Not long after that incident I had a dream where I'd placed my tablet on the same burner, but not with the burner turned on. Instead, I absently placed a hot cast-iron pan on top of the tablet, damaging the case and the display. The dream was so vivid that when I woke up, I had to check the table to be sure it hadn't really happened.
I gave the tablet to my (estranged, now ex-) wife a few months later, but didn't have to explain away any funny-looking scorch marks. Alas, it fell to its death not long afterwards when a cat knocked it off a table.
That's how we know the Earth is spherical, BTW. If it were flat, by now cats would have knocked everything off the edge.
Surprise! Plans for a Brexit version of the EU's Galileo have been delayed
Your McDonald's demo has expired. For full functionality, please purchase a licence or try another fast-food joint
Call us immediately if your child uses Kali Linux, squawks West Mids Police
Artful prankster creates Google Maps traffic jams by walking a cartful of old phones around Berlin
So you locked your backups away for years, huh? Allow me to introduce my colleagues, Brute, Force and Ignorance
US hands UK 'dossier' on Huawei: Really! Still using their kit? That's just... one... step... beyond
Tuesday 14th January 2020 17:53 GMT 
I get the feeling that the super-secret document is a finger-painting by President Trump. And that thought reminded me of poor General Knoxx (possibly my favorite Borderlands franchise NPC). I wonder if dealing with our beloved POTUS is not entirely unlike dealing with Admiral Mikey?
https://borderlands.fandom.com/wiki/General_Knoxx/ECHOs
"I have received your sit-rep written with magic marker on the back of a cupcake. It reads, 'Cats are kool!' And you misspelled 'cool'."
GSMA report: Sorry, handset makers, 5G is not going to save the smartphone market
Wednesday 8th January 2020 17:52 GMT
Re: "It just so happens that there's something better."
The reason DAT never replaced cassettes, regardless of hype: cassettes were cheap, simple, convenient, reasonably reliable, and well established. DAT was higher quality. It took MP3 to replace cassettes -- a format that was cheaper, more convenient, and more portable.
Cassettes were Good Enough for most people.
4G is Good Enough for most people. 5G holds no draw for me.
EA boots Linux gamers out of multiplayer Battlefield V, Penguinistas respond by demanding crippling boycott
Train-knackering software design blunder discovered after lightning sparked Thameslink megadelay
Greetings from the future where it's all pole-dancing robots and Pokemon passports
What's that? Encryption's OK now? UK politicos Brexit from Whatsapp to Signal
Friday 20th December 2019 17:43 GMT
And both apps are based on the same app: Signal!*
Another advantage to Signal: It's not owned by Facebook. You know, the company whose entire raison d'être is to sell as much info about you as it can?
*OK, yes, I know. They both actually use Signal's e2e encryption protocol, which isn't quite the same thing. I'm just being snarky.
** https://www.wired.com/story/ditch-all-those-other-messaging-apps-heres-why-you-should-use-signal/
Gospel according to HPE: And lo, on the 32,768th hour did thy SSD give up the ghost
Questions hang over Gatwick Airport after low level drone near-miss report
Physicists are rather giddy after creating a rare type of laser using laughing gas
High Court dismisses nameless Google Right To Be Forgotten sueball man... yes, again
Can't you hear me knocking? But I installed a smart knocker
Sure, we made your Wi-Fi routers phone home with telemetry, says Ubiquiti. What of it?
Socket to the energy bill: 5-bed home with stupid number of power outlets leaves us asking... why?
Antivirus hid more than 9,000 'cybercrime' reports from UK cops, says watchdog
Big Red tells crypto-coin publication: One does not simply call one's website 'OracleTimes'
Japanese hotel chain sorry that hackers may have watched guests through bedside robots
Sod 3G, that can go, but don't rush to turn off 2G, UK still needs it – report
Friday 18th October 2019 17:25 GMT
Re: On the other hand
"Realistically 2G should not be disabled for at least 20 years with at least a 10 year countdown."
Heh. I agree with you, but nobody will switch over unless they're forced to. Everybody will say "I have plenty of time" until the last minute. Then there'll be a panic during the last six months as people realize the end is nigh. One month before the end, the decision will be made to extend the deadline because nobody is ready. Everybody will relax and go back to their normal state of putting off the transition until the last minute...
And thus it always goes.
Hundreds charged in internet's biggest child-abuse swap-shop site bust: IP addy leak led cops to sys-op's home
Well, well, well. Fancy that. UK.gov shelves planned pr0n block
Conspiracy loons claim victory in Brighton and Hove as council rejects plans to build 5G masts
Stalker attacks Japanese pop singer – after tracking her down using reflection in her eyes
Europe publishes 5G risk assessment; America scrawls ‘Huawei’ on the side of a nuke and goes for a ride
US games company Blizzard kowtows to Beijing by banning gamer who dared to bring up Hong Kong
The mod firing squad: Stack Exchange embroiled in 'he said, she said, they said' row
Atari finally launches its VCS console. Again.
Chef melts under heat, will 86 future deals with family-separating US immigration agencies
This image-recognition roulette is all fun and games... until it labels you a rape suspect, divorcee, or a racial slur
Captain's coffee calamity causes transatlantic flight diversion
Friday 13th September 2019 19:40 GMT
Type "spill proof coffee mug" or "travel mug" into your favorite search engine and stand well back.
Or you can just, you know, spill coffee and ruin hundreds of thousands of dollars' worth of delicate aviation electronics and divert an expensive commercial airplane flight, throw away expensive fuel, piss off customers... because, you know, that would be easier than buying a $25 mug from Starbucks.
Some of the comments suggest that all the electronics should be liquid-proofed. Something that's easy to say, but could cost millions in R&D and easily add thousands to the cost of each device. Or, you know. $25 travel mugs.
(Lest you think I'm exaggerating... Feh. Never mind. Just assume I'm exaggerating.)
UK ISPs must block access to Nintendo Switch piracy sites, High Court rules
Thursday 12th September 2019 00:02 GMT
Re: Quantify losses...
"Another amusing one is that Delaware has a 0% sales tax, so residents around Philadelphia (a short drive really) would pop down to the very conveniently located mall just inside the state line to buy high value stuff."
...And then they'd bring the stuff into the local store for warranty repairs. Thus the Radio Shack in Delaware would get the profits from the sale but our store was liable for the cost of the repair.
We LOVED customers who did that. VERY amusing.
Biz forked out $115k to tout 'Time AI' crypto at Black Hat. Now it sues organizers because hackers heckled it
Criminal mastermind signed name as 'Thief' on receipts after buying stuff with stolen card
Networking giant in hot water for selling US govt buggy spy kit? Huawei again? No, it's Cisco
It's now officially the WhackBook Pro: If the keyboards weren't bad enough, now MacBook Pro batts are a fire risk
Gaze in awe at the first ever movie of a solar eclipse from recording long thought lost forever
One man went to mow a meadow, hoping Trump would spot giant grass snake under flightpath
Monday 3rd June 2019 16:38 GMT
"Edit: use of the word "gaff" suggests a UK poster, not realising an A-level student isn't really expected to have moved out of their parents' home suggests non-UK. So who knows..."
Can't speak for GP, but as an American, I find myself using Britishisms all the time. No doubt due to a lifetime watching British comedies and BBC specials, reading British IT hack rags, and having a few British-authored webcomics in my reading list.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
