* Posts by Jay Lenovo

454 publicly visible posts • joined 26 Jan 2018

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Want to roll like one of the biggest minds in physics? Prof Stephen Hawking's wheelchair is up for auction

Jay Lenovo

Charitable Oddities

Considering Elvis's dad tried to make a buck selling his deceased son's soiled underwear, a wheelchair disposed of to benefit a charity, is at least a much better choice.

Now what the buyer does with the wheelchair, I can't imagine.

That Saudi oil and gas plant that got hacked. You'll never guess who could... OK, it's Russia

Jay Lenovo
Thumb Down

Re: Circular reasoning

It seems for many countries (not just Russia) hacking is like flatulence.

Yeah sorry, I guess that really stinks. But we really couldn't help ourselves.

Euro eggheads call it: Facebook political ads do change voters' minds – and they worked rather well for Trump in 2016

Jay Lenovo

Re: Sample size of 1

One of the reasons why traditionally, mid-terms go the way of the opposite party in power.

When the power brokers in government get too comfortable, corruption breeds.

'The inmates have taken over the asylum': DNS godfather blasts DNS over HTTPS adoption

Jay Lenovo

Re: Not sure...

It's a matter of trust...

VPN or otherwise, your connection requires you to make a trust assumption. Encrypted DNS alone isn't enough to keep you hidden under the sheets.

I ship you knot: 2,400-year-old Greek trading vessel found intact at bottom of Black Sea

Jay Lenovo

Re: If it’s intact…

Fine condition for the world's earliest submarine.

This attempt obviously, was before they had worked out all the kinks.

Zip it! 3 more reasons to be glad you didn't jump on Windows 10 1809

Jay Lenovo
Unhappy

Dr. Windoza Updayt

This will only hurt for a moment..

Oops.. lets try the other arm

Oops.. lets try again...

* Why do we keep coming back?

Stealthy UK startup drops veil on next frontier of speech wizardry

Jay Lenovo
Thumb Up

5 Stars

Think of it as Guitar Hero for Speech (Singstar, Lips, etc)

Soon you'll unlock, Martin Luther King's "I have a Dream" or maybe Winston Churchill's "Finest Hour"

Pull request accepted: You want to buy GitHub, Microsoft? Go for it – EU

Jay Lenovo
Angel

I bought your favorite meeting place, so now we gotta hang out together, right?

Similar price as what they paid for Nokia.

You don't spend that kind of money for failure, or maybe you can?

Yale Security Fail: 'Unexpected load' caused systems to crash, whacked our Smart Living Home app

Jay Lenovo
Joke

Rather "Dumb" Living Home App

"Unexpected Load"....Phooey!

I imagine the folks at Yale must have a lot of children too.

Ex-Huawei man claims Chinese giant is suing his startup to 'surpass' US tech dominance

Jay Lenovo

Occupational Crips and Bloods

One does not just get to work somewhere else, in the same occupation.

That's life in the silicon hood.

From dank memes to Krispy Kremes: British uni eggheads claim viral lol pics make kids fat

Jay Lenovo

Laughy Taffy

So it must follow, a cure for anorexia would be a diet of dank memes?

European Commission: We've called off the lawyers over Ireland's late collection of Apple back taxes

Jay Lenovo
Coat

Taxes and Freedom of Religion

In Ireland, Apple is a corporate god, omnipresent and always with you. There is no location. God pays no taxes.

The iPhone, the iPad, the "i" stands for Irish, Apple's chosen people.

Insects with farts that smell like coriander assist in covering up Paris's aroma d'urine

Jay Lenovo
Trollface

Nose Candy

For a city that once (or for some still) preferred perfume over soap and water, you'd think coriander stink bugs would be a welcome blessing?

Now if we could only genetically modify roaches and rats to have the same gift, all the big cities could smell great.

Microsoft points to a golden future where you can make Windows 10 your own

Jay Lenovo
Unhappy

Customer Feedback

“builds may contain bugs that might be painful for some”

Unfortunately, many of the bugs are also called features.

Our processor tech's got legs, says Arm: 'One million' data center servers will ship in 2018

Jay Lenovo
Windows

Healthy Origins

Arm is producing some very market disruptive technology.

Anyone who disputes this, is welcome to discuss the matter at a Saudi Embassy.

Amazon Prime Music turns the volume down a little too much

Jay Lenovo
FAIL

It's the sound, of silence

The error code displayed, "Exception #300" ...the straw that broke the camel's back.

I guess the first 299 exceptions as to why Prime Music fails, weren't quite enough.

Leaked memo: No internet until you clean your bathroom, Ecuador told Julian Assange

Jay Lenovo

Ecuadorian Embassy or "Forever Home Rescue Foundation"

All they ask is that the pets(both human and cat) are house-broken and don't claw at the neighbors.

Alexa heard what you did last summer – and she knows what that was, too: AI recognizes activities from sound

Jay Lenovo
Trollface

<Insert porn take here>

"Harrison said a related project called Vibrosight, which involves using a laser to measure physical vibrations of an object to determine what it's doing, has already achieved sufficient accuracy for deployment."

Vibrosight? ..really.. Does it need a couple of AA batteries?

NASA chief in Moscow: 'We will fly again on a Russian Soyuz rocket'

Jay Lenovo

Renewed for next season

The writers for this adventure have been ratcheting up the drama.

Space travel feels edgy again.

Penta-gone! Personal records of 30,000 US Dept of Defense workers swiped by miscreants

Jay Lenovo
Facepalm

Government Data Piles

Mountains of data, and so much surface area to protect.

Miscreants must feel like mosquitoes at a nudist colony.

GDPR stands for Google Doing Positively, Regardless. Webpage trackers down in Europe – except Big G's

Jay Lenovo

Every breath you take

Google: Your Twitter followers + 1.

Google: Connects with you more than Facebook

I "Shutter" to think(movie reference), if Google didn't have my back.

AI's next battlefield is literally the battlefield: In 20 years, bots will fight our wars – Army boffin

Jay Lenovo
Terminator

Who Made Who

Can't wait for this idea to go into Maximum Overdrive.

Facebook mass hack last month was so totally overblown – only 30 million people affected

Jay Lenovo
Black Helicopters

Auto Deaths, Cancer, and Facebook

Facebook has become big enough now that 30 million PII fatalities are sad yet unremarkable.

There is not enough pesticide to keep this homogeneous application from disease.

It is 2018 and the NHS is still counting the cost of WannaCry. Carry the 2, + aftermath... um... £92m

Jay Lenovo
Holmes

5th Ave Healthcare

It's almost like digital record systems are faster but continually cost a lot of money.

Broadcom, its baffling $19bn CA biz gobble, and the fake Pentagon memo crying about national security

Jay Lenovo
Coffee/keyboard

Hell's Govt. Kitchen

Recipe for Wealth

* Find a business transaction that requires Federal Approval

* Add one tablespoon "China"

* Add one tablespoon "Security"

* Bake in a BS oven until discovered

If you like this recipe, try my Spicy Collusion.

Microsoft Windows 10 October update giving HP users BSOD

Jay Lenovo
Joke

Re: HP keyboards are special?

Otherwise you couldn't press the Fn^U keys, which auto-orders HP's proprietary ink cartridges.

Jay Lenovo
Mushroom

Levels of Risk

"Some must die so others can live"

-Windows 10 Update

Don't worry it's not drugs or vehicle safety, just your time and data. The latest code is always better, unless it is not.

Fighting the front lines of innovation... brave Windows 10 User.

Chinese Super Micro 'spy chip' story gets even more strange as everyone doubles down

Jay Lenovo

A Matter of Trust

You either believe the Bigfoot testimony or you don't.

Proof apparently is under non-disclosure.

It's a cert: Hundreds of big sites still unprepared for starring role in that Chrome 70's show

Jay Lenovo
Devil

Chrome - Teetotallers of Web Standards

Given that many (even large) web companies forget to renew expiring certs, good luck cramming this working certificate disavowal through the public gullet.

Uncle Sam gives itself the right to shoot down any drone, anywhere, any time, any how

Jay Lenovo
Alert

Drone Delivery, Turkey Shoot

Postal workers now have the right to shoot down any competing drone delivery systems.

"Threat" without clarification, can mean so many things.

IBM won't grow, says analyst firm while eyeing flatlining share price

Jay Lenovo
Coat

Re: This "IBM Cloud" you speak of

Could always rebrand themselves IBC (International Business Cloud).

It made some noise for IHOP...IHOB.

Currently though, a burger from IHOP looks to be a better choice than a cloud from IBM.

On the third day of Windows Microsoft gave to me: A file-munching run of DELTREE

Jay Lenovo
Angel

Microsoft Windows

I used to think that "Windows" was in reference to the ones on the PC screen.

Now, with every forced "upgrade", I feel like the "Windows" referenced, are the ones patients look out through at the insane asylum.

30 years ago, NASA put Challenger behind it and sent a Space Shuttle back out into the black

Jay Lenovo

Space Shuttle - Pop Culture Favorite

There's something very inspirational about a spacecraft that flies into space and lands back on the ground.

The current solution of capsules rocketing off, but returning like a bowel movement hitting the water, are not the visions of space travel we would prefer to embrace.

Chinese tech titans' share prices slump after THAT Super Micro story

Jay Lenovo
Facepalm

Re: Yet another example of the need for security

While first world nations want green laws, they largely don't demand their consumption choices restricted to that hallmark.

There will always be another country willing to fill demand inhibited by the destination's local laws.

Now the addicts are dismayed their dealers are taking liberties with their ill begotten goods.

CEO pleads guilty of conspiring with drug cartels to sell them stealthy Blackberrys

Jay Lenovo
Pint

Pimp my phone

They see me phonin',

They hatin'

Patrollin' and tryna catch me phonin' dirty

Cisco Webex meltdown caused by script that nuked its host VMs

Jay Lenovo
Terminator

It was the humans, the humans did this

New processes are in place to stop bad processes.

CiscoWebex 9000 does not make mistakes.

Screwed SAP salesman scores $660,000 jury award

Jay Lenovo
Devil

A Story Best Avoided

SAP- "Stories are where your data comes to life."

This is what $660,000 of data had to say, said the former salesman.

Congrats SAP on owning that message.

Sun billionaire Khosla discovers life's a beach after US Supreme Court refuses to hear him out

Jay Lenovo
Linux

Project "Open Beach"

Solaris for a time was open source, but that beach was closed too ;.(

Owning a variable tide defined boundary requires room for fuzzy logic... or in this case the California Coastal Act.

Not everything can or should be made proprietary.

Eat my shorts, watchdog tells every city mayor in the US – FCC approves $2bn 5G telco windfall

Jay Lenovo
Unhappy

Checks and un'Balances

Since Pai instituted a $225 fee to lodge a formal complaint with the FCC,

I anticipate mild amounts of "permitted" opposition.

Whoa – oh no, Zoho: Domain name no-show deals CRM biz, 40m punters a crushing blow

Jay Lenovo
Devil

Customer Feedback

Wonder if Zoho has anything they'd like to contribute to Tierra's "What People Are Saying About Us" page?

Microsoft's globally distributed data shack Cosmos DB shoots for sky. Or at least 5 nines

Jay Lenovo

Guaranteed, or receive this great coupon

..Microsoft has put its money where its mouth is with financially backed SLAs.

So, according to the SLA guidelines, if they fail to meet just 2 nines (<99%) for the monthly availability percentage, you at MOST get a 25% service credit.

Is the service credit enough to soothe all ills? You decide

Bouncing robots land on asteroid 180m miles away amid mission to fetch sample for Earth

Jay Lenovo
Alien

Alien Cookout

Ryugu looks like an old charcoal briquette from the solar system's first barbecue

HP Ink should cough up $1.5m for bricking printers using unofficial cartridges – lawsuit

Jay Lenovo

Re: Wait, what?

68 cents? A refund of the cost of printing 3-7 color inkjet pages.

If they mail a check via US Mail (50 cents) with the cost and labor to print it out, would there be any amount left to give?

Enigma message crack honours pioneering Polish codebreakers

Jay Lenovo

Re: Polish contributions

Poland has a much larger story to tell.

The Nazi's execution of the Polish intelligentsia, and the later difficulty of dealing with the iron curtain, made getting and verifying the actual stories difficult.

It seems odd how so much relatively recent history, is still being discovered.

Flying to Mars will be so rad, dude: Year-long trip may dump 60% lifetime dose of radiation on you

Jay Lenovo

This is a job for the Tardigrade (microscopic water bears, relatively impervious to radiation and the vacuum of space).

All of earth's heros may not be human.

No, that Sunspot Solar Observatory didn't see aliens. It's far more grim

Jay Lenovo
Trollface

Re: The reality is clear

So busy with their heads in the clouds, they didn't notice the child porn streaming on in. Who's gonna clean up this mess? I guess not the janitor.

Holy macaroni! After months of number-crunching, behold the strongest material in the universe: Nuclear pasta

Jay Lenovo
Trollface

Re: Nuclear pasta

This nuclear pasta analogy lacks any salt to be good

Remember when Apple's FaceTime stopped working years ago? Yeah, that was deliberate

Jay Lenovo
Unhappy

Give and Take

...let a digital certificate expire prematurely which broke the video-conferencing service for anyone using version 6 or lower of iOS.

Wow, a built-in Apple controlled self-destruct.

What exactly did your purchase buy? Apparently not any fixed function.

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