* Posts by Chemical Bob

613 publicly visible posts • joined 16 Mar 2016

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Amazon may still get .amazon despite govt opposition – thanks to a classic ICANN cockup

Chemical Bob

Re: A (not so Swiftian) modest proposal.

Car - hornet.hudson

Air, sea drones put through their paces on Solent testing range

Chemical Bob

Re: Great idea!

"I would love to see commercial ekranoplans competing with the hovercraft service"

Comparing the eel carrying capabilities would be fun.

Chemical Bob
Unhappy

" the Solent has all the features of a busy sea area – big commercial ships, warships, weekend yacht sailors, high-speed hovercraft"

But no ekranoplans. How do they expect to get test results worth more than a handful of sour owl crap without ekranoplans?!

UK government's war on e-cigs is over

Chemical Bob

Re: Jesus, NO!

"stuffed full of global-warming methane, toxic hydrogen sulphide, irritant ammonia, rancid mercaptans of unknown health effect, bacteria, and a whole range of other by-products"

Mine are considerably worse.

The Atari retro games box is real… sort of

Chemical Bob

Re: PC technology?

Clearly they mean Politically Correct technology. Why they want to appeal to SJWs is beyond me...

Now your boss can tear you a new Glasshole: Google's techno-specs reborn as biz gear

Chemical Bob
Trollface

Do big technology companies really think Trekkies are gullible enough...

...to buy any old crap labeled "Enterprise Edition"?

Vendors rush to call everything AI even if it isn't, or doesn't help

Chemical Bob

applying the AI label too indiscriminately

Question for the Gartner analyst:

What, exactly, is the correct amount of "applying indiscriminately"?

Chemical Bob
Gimp

Well, they've washed *something*!

Chemical Bob
Terminator

Re: Wow

Must be a bot, no real human at Gartner has ever been able to recognize the obvious.

Fake Newspaper steals Reg design to spruik storage upstart

Chemical Bob

Re: External storage smells a bit off

Well, it would make me gag...

Let's go to work: How bots took over business

Chemical Bob

Re: I feel left out

It's better than requesting lemon curry.

Chemical Bob
Terminator

Re: I feel left out

"I seriously considered recently whether an El reg commentard was a bot."

Sorry, I'm real.

IETF moves meeting from USA to Canada to dodge Trump travel ban

Chemical Bob

Re: I wonders whether rooms 1738, 1740, 1742 and 1744 will be booked...

"Potatoes? Parsnips?"

Marmot.

AI vans are real – but they'll make us suck at driving, warn boffins

Chemical Bob

Re: Complete or not at all...

"Ford can't even make an acceptable computerized transmission (the dreaded PowerShift). Who in their right mind thinks they could computerize a whole car?"

Ford.

Chemical Bob

Re: That's only too true

Its called the heel-and-toe method

http://www.caranddriver.com/features/how-to-heel-and-toe

European Parliament keen to throw news publishers a bone

Chemical Bob
Gimp

Re: Happy BERTH DAY MR president

I remember the first time I drank from a bottle with no label, too.

Well,no. I remember waking up four days later in the basement of a dry cleaning establishment aware of a pounding sensation in my head (caused by a Finnish dwarf beating me with a chair leg), wearing nothing but lederhosen several sizes too small and having lost my keys and wallet.

To this day I cannot father children and am still wondering why the dwarf was wearing only acupuncture needles.

Trump tramples US Constitution by blocking Twitter critics – lawsuit

Chemical Bob

Re: Options:

I'll take option number 4 - custard.

Its like number 3 only yummy.

Got a Windows Phone 8 mobe? It's now officially obsolete. Here's why...

Chemical Bob
WTF?

OneCore platform strategy

Are you sure it wasn't supposed to be Wanker platform strategy?

Adult toy retailer slapped down for 'RES-ERECTI*N' ad over Easter

Chemical Bob
Happy

Re: 2 Wrongs make a right here I think

"even if they choose not to respect my peace and quiet on a Sunday morning by banging on my door and trying to thrust copies of Watchtower in my hand!"

Next time they come by, answer the door while wearing nothing but grubby underpants. Problem solved!

Chemical Bob
Joke

Well, Batman and Robin *did* wear tights...

Better mobe coverage needed for connected cars, says firm flogging networking gear

Chemical Bob

OK, you're old fashioned.

Ubuntu Linux now on Windows Store (for Insiders)

Chemical Bob
Windows

Re: Oh, sort of Wine in reverse then?

Backwards. Backwards is much more appropriate to all things Microsoft.

Ghost of NTLM still haunts Microsoft: Aged protocol hole patched

Chemical Bob

dismissed the RDP flaw by telling Preempt it represents "a known issue."

MS is at least acknowledging the issue which is better than IBM did many a year ago when I reported a bug in the way OS/2 v4 handled the microphone volume when running Windows 3.1 programs (yes, kids, IBM's agreement with MS let them include support for Windows 3.1 programs). IBM's response was that they were not going to do anything about it as it was not a known or unknown bug.

DARPA cracks wallet to open heads: Brain interface projects get Uncle Sam's backing

Chemical Bob
Thumb Up

Re: So when do I get my Neural Lace?

Regarding the Polish girls ------->

Chemical Bob
Coat

Nah, just a metal funnel like the tin woodsman had...

Mine's the one with 'The Wonderful Wizard of Oz' in the pocket.

Microsoft boasted it had rebuilt Skype 'from the ground up'. Instead, it should have buried it

Chemical Bob
Windows

Re: Market research

"I thought Microsoft had their own supply of faster horse shit."

Not faster. Bloated, slow and tangled.

Chemical Bob
Coat

Re: what might they do to Office?!?!

Put ribbons in it's hair...

Bonkers call to boycott Raspberry Pi Foundation over 'gay agenda'

Chemical Bob

Re: "pushing LGBTQI"

"I used to be trisexual. But my wheels kept getting stuck..."

Then you're doing it wrong.

Useful Ajit Pai's lawyer nominated for top US telco watchdog role

Chemical Bob
Unhappy

Re: Sehr Geehrter Lügenführer Drumpf

Oh, the drainey-swampy thing is going just fine. It's just that to you and me the swamp is the tangled web of corporate special interests that want consumer protections and regulation removed so they can stick tracking devices up our exit ramps in order to monetize every aspect of our lives but to the Cheeto Emperor the swamp is the tangled web of consumer protections and regulation preventing corporations from monetizing every aspect of our lives by sticking tracking devices up our exit ramps.

Blunder down under: self-driving Aussie cars still being thwarted by kangaroos

Chemical Bob

Re: Cane toads

"I believe this is a job for lasers."

Why would you want lasers to swerve around the road on slippery toads?

Chemical Bob

Re: Septic 'merkins...

...is a very nasty mental picture.

Chemical Bob
Devil

Re: Logic? It can be difficult for humans as well.

"So considering that humans have had millenia to develop logic, should we really expect AI to be able to grasp it perfectly so soon?"

Depends entirely on the kind of drugs Stoner AI would do...

Chemical Bob

Re: Idiots!

Mutant ninja roos (and wallabies).

Chemical Bob

Re: Elephants rarely jump into the air

But when they do...

NATO: 'Cyber' is a military domain

Chemical Bob

Re: For your own protection,

It will end well. After all, the cybermen have hydraulic brainz.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ueq_U-yU7_4

Search results suddenly missing from Google? Well, BLAME CANADA!

Chemical Bob

Re: Does this mean...

...all heck will break loose.

Doesn't sound too bad. Does it tickle?"

Ask Phil.

Don't panic, but Linux's Systemd can be pwned via an evil DNS query

Chemical Bob

Re: At some point in the article

"https://devuan.org/"

CP/M

Chemical Bob

Re: If THIS isn't a reason to hate systemd...

"What's with all the exclaimation marks?"

A Yahoo commented(?)

No way to sugarcoat this: I'm afraid Uranus opens and closes to accept particle streams

Chemical Bob

"It's always fascinating when they probe Uranus."

Don't you mean 'f*ass*inating

Robocall spammers, you have one new voicemail message: Cut it out!

Chemical Bob

Re: Won't work.

"Please go and make the NHS stop..."

The NHS doesn't call anyone where the FCC operates.

Google to remove private medical data from search results

Chemical Bob
Unhappy

Re: "no opt-out for patients who do not wish to share their data."

"Here in the states, it would be a direct violation of HIPPA."

Just wait a bit, HIPPA will be thrown in the Trumpster Dumpster soon enough

BOFH: Putting the commitment into committee

Chemical Bob
Pint

Re: A Question of style

" had to admit that I'd created a picture in mspaint and set it as my background, then just dropped icons into the relevant sections"

That solution is quite elegant in its simplicity. Have an upvote and one of these ------->

Canadian sniper makes kill shot at distance of 3.5 KILOMETRES

Chemical Bob
Boffin

Re: 29" barrel

"one then has to ask how they got the battleship up there in the first place"

A rather enormous flatbed truck.

Chemical Bob

Re: all gins blazing

Once we fire up the auxiliary ginerators there are no capacity problems.

Tesla death smash probe: Neither driver nor autopilot saw the truck

Chemical Bob
Coat

Re: Right, $50 of bars will stop a 4000lb car going 74mph.

"we don't have things like level crossings and bridges in Europe"

You should get them, they're quite handy.

'OK, everyone. Stop typing, this software is DONE,' said no one ever

Chemical Bob

Re: I cannot agree more.

...I miss XMMS

Telegram chat app founder claims Feds offered backdoor bribe

Chemical Bob

Re: Secure Chats

"I attack the gazebo with my +1 sword! ... how many xp do I get?"

Around here you'll get sued for property damage...

Misys and D+H borg, form mega-fintech titan Finastra

Chemical Bob

They'll probably still Finnish last, tho...

It's 2017 and Microsoft is still patching Windows XP+ – to plug holes exploited by trio of leaked NSA weapons

Chemical Bob

Re: @gerdesj

You, sir, have sullied the reputations of dogs everywhere!

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