* Posts by Chemical Bob

613 publicly visible posts • joined 16 Mar 2016

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Yes, I took Putin's roubles to undermine Western democracy. This is my story

Chemical Bob

Re: I don't get it?

Why would anyone Google the word "spoilsport"?

Pastry in a manger: We're soz, Greggs man said

Chemical Bob
Devil

Re: Spineless of them to give in

Frankly, little baby Jesus was replaced by the sausage roll a long, long time ago (figuratively speaking).

Think the US is alone? 18 countries had their elections hacked last year

Chemical Bob
Devil

Re: Who is Marc Rich?

" I thought we had other worries like jobs, health insurance, N. Korea, etc., etc."

It's simple, really. You aren't a Real American if you're concerned about those things.

Red Hat opens its ARMs to Enterprise Linux... er, wait, perhaps it's the other way round

Chemical Bob
Linux

Re: But will it play Crysis?

Who cares. I want to know if it will play SuperTuxKart!

The NAKED truth: Why flashing us your nude pics is a good idea – by Facebook's safety boss

Chemical Bob

Re: WTF???

"What's a wombat? Is it a thing you need to play wom?"

Well, you wouldn't want to use a cricket bat - they're used for whacking zombies' heads off.

UK Home Sec thinks a Minority Report-style AI will prevent people posting bad things

Chemical Bob
Boffin

Re: The only viable explanation for going off the straight and narrow and onto a bender.

"When amanfromMars calls you out for crazy, incoherent babble, you know you have a problem."

No, you don't know because you are too crazy and incoherent.

Microsoft president says the world needs a digital Geneva Convention

Chemical Bob

Re: Speaking of Microsoft

Ah, but those nodes are being set up by Paying Customers. If MS did something about that, they'd lose Paying Customers which leads to Not Making Money. And nobody has figured out how to monetize Not Making Money.

On second thought, Uwe Boll has figured out how to monetize that...

Brace yourselves, fanboys. Winter is coming. And the iPhone X can't handle the cold

Chemical Bob

Re: Apple looks pretty much the same: pasty, white and male...

I'm sure some of the interns are sober...

Self-driving bus in crash just 2 hours after entering public service

Chemical Bob
FAIL

Re: German Efficiency

"Vehicle to vehicle collisions would be almost non-existent if all vehicles were autonomous and were in communication with each other..."

Look, if we can't figure out how to drive, why does anybody think we can teach machines to drive better?

Dumb autonomous cars can save more lives than brilliant ones

Chemical Bob
Trollface

Re: automatic breaking

The auto industry has been trying to get this working for years as a way to boost sales.

China-owned Opera touts big comeback

Chemical Bob

Re: No thanks

"Who isn't receiving your browsing data?"

Me. I am not receiving your browsing data. Sadly, I am the only one not receiving it...

Mythbuster seeks cash for roller skates to wear in virtual reality

Chemical Bob

Re: > I think that most gamers don't have that kind of fitness.

"They will soon...."

Only the ones that survive...

Parity calamity! Wallet code bug destroys $280m in Ethereum

Chemical Bob
Flame

Re: This is when I know I'm getting old...

"But now... to top it all... money needs a software update."

Think of it as the digital equivalent of a fire.

Microsoft goes to bat for Dreamers: Windows giant sues Uncle Sam to block staff deportations

Chemical Bob

Re: Microsoft Vs Trump administration

Oh, if only it would work that way....

Apache OpenOffice: We're OK with not being super cool... PS: Watch out for that Mac bug

Chemical Bob
Headmaster

Re: Math?

Math - short for Mathematics, a noun that is singular even though plural in form. Sorry, but this time those of us on the left side of the Atlantic are correct. Just kidding, not sorry at al. Neener, neener, etc, etc...

https://ell.stackexchange.com/questions/51955/is-mathematics-singular-or-plural

Verizon whips out Big Johnson to lure FCC into axing US states' net neutrality, privacy rules

Chemical Bob

Verizon should be careful what it wishes for...

...because if it gets it's way we might have to do this:

http://www.thirdworldtraveler.com/Controlling_Corporations/NewCourse_CorpsRights.html

Facebook vows to double staff with new cadre of Net Police

Chemical Bob

Re: Maybe its finished

"But there has to be somewhere for the people leaving to go."

Outside (?)

'The Queen' is showing Geneva how to be polite on public transport

Chemical Bob

Re: You mean we do something well?

Of course you do!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTartgZ6n9Q&pbjreload=10

Car insurers recoil in horror from paying auto autos' speeding fines

Chemical Bob

"I had this daft idea that parliament and not companies were supposed to draft legislation."

Yes, that is daft.

Robot takes the job of sitting on your arse

Chemical Bob
Coat

C'mon, El Reg, you missed the obvious

Ford Prefect

With apologies to Douglas Adams

Uber's revolting sexism, the movie

Chemical Bob

Re: Who would pay money to see it?

"'m not going to reply to the rest of your comment, but seriously "Follow your bliss." ????

Really?"

Well, you wouldn't want to get ahead of your bliss. Could be disturbing.

Biz quadruples value overnight by adding 'Blockchain' to name

Chemical Bob

Re: Joe BlockChain Bloggs

But wouldn't having 'Danger' for your middle name be more fun?

Ubuntu 17.10: We're coming GNOME! Plenty that's Artful in Aardvark, with a few Wayland wails

Chemical Bob
Coat

Re: Gun, meet foot.

"What's now to differentiate between Ubuntu and Fedora, which works very nicely with weyland?"

Wait until it merges with the yutani project. Then things will be quite Alien....

Chemical Bob
Linux

Re: Nice

"slackware ftw"

No, Bloody Stupid Linux FTW!

http://bloodystupid.clockwatching.org/

Legends of the scrawl: Ordnance Survey launches augmented reality tool for maps

Chemical Bob

Re: I don't think I need to explain the perils of poo.

You'd be surprised...

Please replace the sword, says owner of now-hollow stone

Chemical Bob
Flame

Re: new fangled gas lighting..

I have a dummy assistant do it for me. He is now permanently hairless and covered in scar tissue.

Chemical Bob
Joke

Re: new fangled gas lighting..

You mean you light your own farts?

Chemical Bob
Coat

Re: How long by horseback to London??

Wrong question. The right question is 'Metric or English?' Everyone knows that metric horses take 1.6 times longer to travel a mile than English horses.

Chemical Bob

Re: People may be offended..

"Waving Excalibur and expecting to be crowned is likely to be met by Xcalibre, where X=4.7mm."

Ah, but it's only illegal if it's done "without lawful authority or reasonable excuse". Being destined to be King would be both lawful authority and reasonable excuse...

Chemical Bob
Thumb Up

Re: wants Flash, the boobs.

Flashing the boobs is alright by me.

Microsoft exec says ARM-powered Windows laptops have multi-day battery life

Chemical Bob
Windows

Re: So forget Microsoft in your pocket. Microsoft wants to be on your lap

Microsoft anywhere near my pants is just kind of creepy.

No, the FCC can't shut down TV stations just because Donald Trump is mad at the news

Chemical Bob

Re: Too many words?

And superfluous is better than fluous the same way that infamous is better than famous...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIGtHhAfe8w

So the 'Year of Linux' never happened. When is it Chrome OS's turn?

Chemical Bob

For me it was 2001.

I love disruptive computer jargon. It's so very William Burroughs

Chemical Bob

it all sounds jolly tuneful in my head

You're welcome.

OnePlus privacy shock: So, the cool Chinese smartphones slurp an alarming amount of data

Chemical Bob

Re: at the other AC, Bob

Can you blame me?! I mean, really, you look like an avocado had sex with a much older and uglier avocado.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpTycWYX6No&pbjreload=10

Chemical Bob

Re: To be honest

"You wouldn't buy a house with the option that Bob can come round and watch you in the bath if he wanted to."

Depends. Are we talkin' 'bout me or Bombastic Bob?

Footie ballsup: Petition kicks off to fix 'geometrically impossible' street signs

Chemical Bob

Re: Or a spherical cow(oid)...

"Perfectly smooth?"

And in a vacuum.

Star Wars: Big Euro cinema group can't handle demand for tickets to new flick

Chemical Bob

Re: So what is step 4?

Blow a gasket because the ticket website crashed when trying to buy tickets too effing early.

How many times can Microsoft kill Mobile?

Chemical Bob

Re: Microsoft is trying very hard to kill itself.

"After what we've seen on the desktop, mobile and even server, in the last few years, there aren't too many more areas left for them to screw up in."

I'm sure they will soon start a diversification effort in order to find new industries to fail at.

Animal husbandry, for example.

Leicestershire teen admits attempting to hack director of the CIA

Chemical Bob

Re: causing risk of serious damage to human welfare/national security

"isn't the CIA security at fault"

You obviously don't know what the C, I and A stand for. It's the Complete Idiot Agency, they exist to draw the public's attention away from the NSA.

Blade Runner 2049: Back to the Future – the movies that showed us what's to come

Chemical Bob

Repo! The Genetic Opera

No bankruptcy protection, everyone is ill and in spite of that life is a musical.

Oh, and Alexa Vega...

Dumb bug of the week: Apple's macOS reveals your encrypted drive's password in the hint box

Chemical Bob
Trollface

I'm sure they did it on purpose to satisfy the FBI.

Computers4Christians miraculously appears on Ubuntu wiki

Chemical Bob

Re: They sometimes explode.

You say that like it's a bad thing...

Life began after meteorites splashed into warm ponds of water, say astronomers

Chemical Bob
Devil

"Why oh why does the religious tosh persist, are they that insecure/weak that they need to think that there is someone "up there" looking after them? The planet would be a far better place if religion DIDN'T exist."

Religion and belief that some deity exists need not be one and the same. Anything that asks and answers "What is wrong with us" and "What do we do about it" is essentially a religion. Yes, I am defining religion as an innate human behavior. Your post asks and answers those two questions which indicates that you have some personal demons to exorcise if you truly wish to be free of this dread disease.

Chemical Bob

"What is the answer to their question?"

The answer to that question waits for another scientific advance. Just like all the other answers.

Chemical Bob

"You can see how a lot of people get freaked out by the huge knowledge gap and fill it with religious explanations."

God always exists right past the end of one's 'knows'...

At least now most of us don't freak out when an eclipse happens.

Thomas the Tank Engine lobotomised by fat (remote) controller

Chemical Bob
Coat

Re: High self opinion?

"I looked up properties for sale in Paraburdoo."

Yeah, but ya gotta remember it ain't *real* burdoo, it's *para*burdoo...

Bad news! Astroboffins find the stuff of life in space for the first time

Chemical Bob
Thumb Up

Re: It's life Jim, but not as we know it.

Damn, beat me to it! Have an upvote.

Chemical Bob

Re: Word Salad vs Gobbledegook

"Did I just see amanfromMars 1 complaining about the comprehensibility of someone else's writing style?"

You, sir, need a higher Ambiguity Tolerance.

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