* Posts by allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

6157 publicly visible posts • joined 20 Oct 2015

Snake oil ads land China's top search engine in trouble

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Dodgy 'Doctors'

"Trouble at t' lab!"

"What sort of trouble?"

"One of t' cross beams has gone out of skew at t' centrifuge!"

Microsoft wants devs to take notes on their families

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: In my circle ...

Post-Its? Rampant consumerism, indulging in new-fangled thingies like that...

What's wrong with using a twig to scrawl a message in the dirt in front of the cave, huh?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: midnight fridge raids

"Open the fridge door, HAL."

"I'm sorry Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."

Engineer uses binary on voting bumpf to flag up Cali election flaws

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Ahem, everyone voting on (almost) everything does exist....

Admittedly Switzerland is a much smaller saner* nation than the US ...

*Case in point: everybody armed to the teeth, yet hardly any mass shootings.

Are state-sponsored attackers poisoning the statistical well?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: The sky is falling!

So, how are the chances that a Bad Actor's tampering with the data actually corrects it?

Anyway, that's not how proper decisions are made. First, you decide what you want to do. Then you find the right data to support your decision.

SpaceX adds Mars haulage to its price list

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Less than $200 an ounce

"What would you send?"

A big box of Mars bars, obviously...

If the Internet of Things will be SOOO BIG why did Broadcom just quit the market?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Peak IoT in sight?

No. Not for a long while. Too many companies are gearing up to enter into it (Intel, anyone?). The momentum is still building up. Or the bubble is being pumped or whatever you want to call it. There are a lot of companies who don't quite know what to do next now that their existing business models are having troubles.

Anyway, smart move by Broadcom, good for them. I hope they use the money for R&D of things we might actually need or at least can use in a sensible way.

Auto erotic: Self-driving cars will let occupants bonk on the go

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

So, will autonomous vehicle be illegal in the Bible BeltTM ?

Qualcomm goes for the grey matter with neural net SDK

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Brains? Or ancient gods?

"... an ancient Sumerian or Hittite god ..."

Make up your mind. I need to know in order to calibrate the trap accordingly.

Web site admins: Brace for weekend traffic surges from iOS devices

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Maybe the iOS users must work long and hard all week in order to be able to afford their shiny and only have time off at the weekend to do private stuff involving government websites?

Seriously, no idea. Let's just call it a statistical anomaly and be done with it.

Michigan electricity utility downed by ransomware attack

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Good Links - Bad Links" - film at 11.

Chrome edges out IE for desktop browser crown

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Not that I'd trust any statistic I haven't made up carefully compiled myself I'm surprised that it took so long, what with the rapid proliferation of mobile devices. You'd think the odd Android user would notice that their mobile thingy lets them use the internet with something else than IE and think hey, maybe I can do that on my PC as well.

On a side note: any browser is reasonable fast when you block all the crap you don't need anyway.

Twitter loses FISA fight

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

No biggie. After all we know that we can trust the TLAs blindly as they would never ever do something illegal, unconstitutional or unethical. Right? Right? Guys? What?

Dell to change name to 'Dell Technologies'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Im in a state of total ungrippedness...

How about Dell Advanced Future Technologies?

F-35s failed 'scramble test' because of buggy software

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

My dad keeps telling me about planes you allegedly could just start, and then fly them for a couple of hours. Does anybody know whether that's really true?

Food for Deep Thought: 42 is IBM's answer to Life, the Universe and Everything...

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: sorry about the Earth..

Never mind. I mean, it's not like we don't have a spare one.

Japan's Hitomi space 'scope bricked, declared lost after software bug

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: 'Paranoid Programming Practices' / Therac 25

Had to look that one up. Scary. (Thought at first it was a reference to something fictional like Alpha60.)

Carl Icahn: Will someone rid my portfolio of this rotten Apple?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: The 1%

What, the odd breadcrumb from your lord and master's table is not enough to feed your family on, peasant?

India trumpets seventh navigation sat launch

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: @Lester Haines Wonder how much they charge...

Also, doesn't ULA buy rocket motors from Russia?

The EU wants you to log into YouTube using your state-issued ID card

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: To be fair

By now it is already a part of "our"* culture**. At least for the current generation and the one before that. And certainly the next.

* and **: Whatever that means anyway... I understand definitionsdmay vary.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

It's not "The EU" - it's one guy from a little known baltic country who obviuosly thinks he doesn"t get the publicity he deserves. And it's working.

Intel loses its ARM wrestling match, kicks out Atom mobe chips

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Don't see Intel succeeding at IoTs.

"Did I mention that it isn't even certain whether anyone of the "consumer demographic" will even shell out for IoT stuff, whatever it is when it will be something?"

That's assuming we will be given a choice. Odds are, we won't, at least outside the 'premium' range.

Daft draft anti-car-hack law could put innocent drivers away for life

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Preparation for the new laws

"Maybe I read too much Heinlein and Niven."

I seriously doubt that's even possible.

Pop goes the weasel! Large Hadron Collider blown up by critter chomping 66kV cable

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"The AI will not be a sitting mainframe."

Damn right. It will be in the always-on network of IoT crap. Distributed computing on a global scale. And we won't be able to unplug or disconnect enough of them at any given time to disable it. Looks like we're doomed.

It's 2016 and now your internet-connected bathroom scales can be hacked

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"The future's now, but it's all going wrong..." - The The

SpaceX is go for US military GPS sat launch, smashes ULA monopoly

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

The first rule of overpriced government contracts is: you don't talk about overpriced government contracts.

Europe's Earth-watching sat beams back icy first pic

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Nice pic. Glaciers are cool.

The Devils of DevOps stick it to YOU

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"DevOps can solve anything, can’t it? Well, no. In fact, if you don’t implement DevOps correctly, you’ll find that not only do you carry over the problems of the old world but that birth a few brand new ones, too. (emphasis by me)

That's always the get-out-of-jail-card, isn't it? Every consultant's recommendation, every 'revolutionary new' idea of fixing things that are not broken, everything that falls under BaaS*, in short ervery bag of hot air comes with this in the small print. It didn't work? No, it wasn't a stupid idea in the first place - you did it wrong! Stupid little client... But don't despair - here's another bag of hot air we can sell you!

*Bullshit as a Service

It's World IP Day! Celebrate by making money from a dead teenager

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Not to be picky but Anne Frank didn't have any descendants..."

She was survived by her father, Otto, who was the sole survivor of the whole family. He published Anne's diary and died in 1980.

Your mother has a smooth forehead, Klingon language lovers roar at Paramount

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Paramount is acting short-sighted and, well, just plain dumb. Yes, they have a point about copyright(s), but this would have been an excellent opportunity for massive positive and cost free PR. It adds to my already strong belief that the only companies that should be run by accountants are accountancy firms.

Anyway: There are also Klingonz. Have a nice weekend, everybody.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Except for the fact that Doohan was Canadian?

Being Scottish is a state of mind.

Rampant robot tries to rip my clothes off

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Bring Your Robot to Work" day - that is simply bloody brilliant! Thanks for the inspiration. I've been sitting at my desk for half an hour now and playing this scenario out in my head like watching a movie.

Mr Dabbs, if we ever should meet face to face, drinks are on me.

Germans stick traffic lights in pavements for addicts who can't take their eyes off phones

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: In the interest of safety...

Oh, think of the fun possibilites when that app is hacked!

Riverbed gears up for its second IPO

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: "IPO"

RPO?

Repeated Public Offering?

(IPO or RPO, it's as "public" as a public school in Britain anyway.)

Apple will be grilled by Irish National Planning Board over €850m data centre plan

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Go to Topshop, make a Bluetooth gizmo, stick it on your dress

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Yes! Add Bluetooth! Everything is better with Bluetooth!

Seriously, this is even lower on the scale of things than a solution looking for a problem.

Cloud! IoT! APIs! Collect all the data! Samsung wins today's tech bingo

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Samsung! Can! Smeg! Off! With! Any! IoT! Crap! As! Far! As! I! Am! Concerned! And! The! Same! Goes! For! Any! Other! Company!

German prof scores €2.4m EU grant to crack software on your bicycle

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Heathrow Airbus collision 'not a drone incident'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Hmm. Makes me wonder how many UFO sightings were due to stray bin liners.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Richard Branson will lead Sage's 'sexy accounting' shtick

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

How else could the beancounters get even close to a good looking actress?

Good enough IT really is good enough. You don't need new hardware

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Falling for the marketing hype does your business more harm than good"

Oh, oh, oh - DevOps, anyone?

Tokyo rebrands 2020 Olympics

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

The Olympic Games

Or as I like to call it, The Quadrennial International Sports Medicine Exhibition.

How to overcome objections that stop your enterprise from adopting DevOps

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

I'd buy a ticket!

Please keep us posted.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: I still have no idea what the fuck it is!

"Imagine trying to fix the plane while you're still flying it."

Standard procedure for some of the cheaper Russia-based freight haulers, or so I'm told.

30 years on, Chernobyl wildlife still feeling effects of nuke plant catastrophe

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Have they though about twinning with Norfolk?"

Which one?

Honestly though, Twitter can't do anything right

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Take a seat. Relax. Make yourself comfortable. You are at a safe place. Close your eyes. Take a deep, deep breath. Exhale slowly through your nose. Now open your eyes and repeat after me:

Twitter will never make any money.

Intel CEO Krzanich: PCs are things too!

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: PCs are also things

So Intel is the hardware supplier to the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation?

Net scum lock ancient Androids, force users to buy iTunes gift cards

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Indeed. We had to take turns impersonating a sundial.

Hackers so far ahead of defenders it's not even a game

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Bad Grammar

"I chuck the linked-in invitations out even faster than the phishing emails."

But how can you tell them apart?

Oh, right... never mind!

Brainwave-controlled drone racing is here

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: not exactly "exciting" yet BUT...

Really exiting would be drones being powered by brainwaves.