* Posts by allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

6157 publicly visible posts • joined 20 Oct 2015

It's time for humanity to embrace SEX ROBOTS. For, uh, science, of course

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Futurama

"Not tonight, Dave - I have this terrible pain in all my diodes down there..."

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Dr Richardson told us that she believed the introduction of sex robots would increase what she described to us as the damage to society caused by prostitution ."

It's called "the oldest profession" for a reason. Prostitution has been a factor in all societies since there were any societies. Like it or not, prostitution hasn't so much damaged our (and any other) society as shaped it.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Has there ever been any studies or actual evidence for anything being a "gateway" to aggravate any impulse? It always seems very hand-wavy and witch-hunty to me. Cannabis being a gateway to heroin, video games being a gateway to criminality, D&D being a gateway to Satan worship, etc."

Being a commentard on El Reg's forums is a gateway to .... ???

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Female sex toys such as rabbits come in a wide variety of colours, shapes and sizes and do not appear like phalluses and there is a rising interest in “dragon dildos” too."

FWIIW, that's quite often due to a legal background. There are countries where a dildo shaped like a human penis would be illegal to produce/sell, but something shaped like, say, a dolphin is okay.

Publishing military officers' names 'creates Islamic State hitlist'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

The Royal Fami,y should be safe - as they are alien space lizards* anyway they've always used pseudonyms.

* BTW, does anyone know whether they glow in the dark or not? I have €10 riding on this.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Major Hazard

Also, Major Dilemma.

QANTAS' air safety spiel warns not to try finding lost phones

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Anyway, back to the matter at hand:

"Airline safety spiel prohibits finding lost phones" No, it doesn't. That's just clickbait, and by El Reg's standards (which from time to time regales us with sparks of true genius) pretty lame at that.

How do you determine you've lost your phone? You check the obvious first: wrong pocket, wrong bag, wrong orifice? On the floor below your seat? Nicked by that obnoxious brat in the row behind you? If those checks all turn out negative, it might be possible the thing has wedged itself in some part of the plane, seat or otherwise. And I don't think there is any airline that is okay with passengers starting to dismantle parts of their aircraft's interior.

PIC Your correspondent noted something odd during his flight to VMworld 2016 aboard Australian airline QANTAS: during the pre-flight safety briefing passengers were told to ask the crew for help if they lost their phones aboard the A380 and not, repeat not, to try to find it themselves.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Re-enactment needed

Yes.

"Aircraft boneyard, Mojave, California."

No.

Playmobil!

Hollywood offers Daniel Craig $150m to (slash wrists) play James Bond

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Daniel Brühl.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Surely it must be El Reg's finest...

YES!

... and if not 007, than at the very least as Q.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
Coffee/keyboard

Re: You're a spy, Harry

See icon. But yes, there is some potential in this...

While we're at it: why not David Tennant, since Bond is obviously a timelord himself?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Sigh ...

Lazenby wasn't that bad; as an actor he had about the same range as Moore.

OHMSS sort of failed because it deviated from the formula in two vital points.

1. Bond getting married.

2. "Solving" that by letting the bad guy kill Bond's wife on their honeymoon. Which means the movie ends without Bond being the winner that takes all.

Also, killing Emma Peel Diana Rigg - what were they thinking?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Why can't we just clone Sean Connery and be done with it now and for ever?

International Space Station astros prepare to rejoin us Earthlings

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

That's about the only 'slide show about my last trip' invitation I'd accept...

Safe landing, guys!

HSBC: How will we verify business banking customers? Selfies!

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Do I get a free selfie stick with that?

Nul points: PM May's post-Brexit EU immigration options

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Summer of vagueness" - I really like the term, if not the truth behind it.

So, here's hoping for an "autumn of thoughtfullness", a "winter of weighing the options" and a "spring of deceidedness", shall we?

Chubby Chinese students refused top bunk

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

NHS

And then, there's this.

These are not just job cuts, these are M&S job cuts

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Out of London..."

... and into where exactly?

O2: Float or flog. What's it going to be, Telefonica?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Here come the groundhogs

CO2 ?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Brexit opportunity...

Only if the parties involved are willing/able to wait 2+ years, depending on when* article 50 is triggered and the outcome of the negotiations that follow.

* Word from 10 at tis moment is "not this year".

Next Mars landing scheduled for Monday, November 26th, 2018

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: No Problem . . .

How much is that in Altairian Dollars?

'Hey, Elon? You broke it, you bought it' says owner of SpaceX's satellite cinder

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Insurance covered the launch

That could be it...

Anyway, as long as the cause of the failure? malfunction? has not been determined it's a bit early to point fingers and make demands.

Pixellation popped: AI can ID you, even after PhotoShop phuzzing

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"There's an "if" here, namely that pixellation can be popped if an "attacker” has a set of clear shots to practice on. If they do, and the AI has access to to those shots, forget about facial blocking as an anonymity mechanism."

Which means this is a "learning" system that compares sets of data. A very clever implementation, but still not AI, at least not above the "trained monkey" level.

McAfee-the-man wants McAfee-the-brand, Chipzilla says no

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

The saga continues...

Appliance-maker Liebherr chillin' with Microsoft, prototyping another Internet fridge

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

It's LIEBHERR, not 'Leibherr'*. And they make fridges, cranes of all sorts, aircraft components, etc - and are still a family company.

I can see fridges in labs, hospitals and so on being connected; fridges holding stuff that must be stored at exactly the right temperature and kept track of. But my fridge in my kitchen? Can't see the point.

* I know, I know - 'Tips and corrections'. But where's the fun in that?

HDMI hooks up with USB-C in cables that reverse, one way

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: 'pfaff'?

That one left me puzzled, too - I only ever knew 'Pfaff' as a maker of sewing machines.

'I'm sorry, your lift has had a problem and had to shut down'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Elevator

I think this proves two points:

1. Douglas Adams was a true visionary.

2. Management* in elevator companies never read him.

* Pretty sure the engineers did, but, alas... You know the drill, don't you?

Brexit must not break the cloud, Japan tells UK and EU

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Dear Japan

Just a friendly reminder: The EmpireTM went into liquidation some 70 years ago. While Britain is still something of a global player politically, what with with having the right to veto anything in the UN security council and Trident and whatnot, Britain isn't in the position to "call the shots" unilaterally in any kind of negotiation regarding economics or trade.

This week I have reading...

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Just started John Cleese's autobiography.

Intel bags FAA pass to fly 100-strong drone armadas over US soil

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Can one rent Intel's drone fleet? I"d love to see it over the Cheltenham doughnut, forming up to read "SIGINT inside!".

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Oh dear

When you are world emperor, can I be one of your henchmen? I"m loyal, smart, resourceful and I look good in black.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Sorry, I just have to ask: " perceptual computing " ???

Beautiful, efficient, data-sucking Smart Cities: Why do you give us the creeps?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

I can think of people wanting this, and those are not happy thoughts.

Childcare app bods wipe users' data – then discover backups had been borked for a year

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Two is one, and One is None."

NBA's Golden State Warriors sued for 'mic snooping' mobile app

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Answer Is Simple

What is this "Windows Phone" you speak of?

Is it time to unplug frail OpenOffice's life support? Apache Project asked to mull it over

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: The problem with LibreOffice is it is not a software development entity..

"Honey, go see Phillip. Ask him for some yellow pills."

Still got a floppy drive? Here's a solution for when 1.44MB isn't enough

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

IIRC, 'certain codes' were* stored on floppy discs, but of the 8" variant.

* Possibly still are. It's hard to believe in this day and age, but there are still some things the US military won't post on FB or Twitter.

New Microsoft Bug Bounty

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Not eating enough carrots

BTW, most of the "carrots are good for your eyes" thing is actually the legacy of WWII disinformation, especially regarding night vision. It's true that carrots have vitamins that your eyes need. But switching to a carrot-heavy diet won't give you SuperVisionTM. The Brits put out that their night fighter pilots were given extra rations of carrots in order to improve their night vision as a way to explain away their steadily rising success rate. In fact they were using RADAR and were getting really good at it pretty fast - but didn't want the opposition to know that.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Not eating enough carrots

Be wewwy, wewwy quiet, I'm hunting wabbits bugs...

What the hex is up with Jupiter's North Pole?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

It somehow reminds me of the Magic Roundabout at Hemel Hempstead.

Dwarf planet Ceres has a watery secret: An 11 mile wide ice volcano

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: So now possibly the most desirable piece of off Earth real estate in the solar system

So, it could do a... Brexit?

Google scraps its Project Ara modular smartphone wheeze

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: The only way a modular phone is going to work

Two words: gaffer tape. Looks a bit like taping two magazines together, though.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Really?

Exactly.

The only part of a mobile phone that should be "modular", in other words replaceable, is the battery.

Hewlett Packard Enterprise in talks to offload software, asking for '$8bn to $10bn'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: neat idea, but...

...... and the bankers' cut(s) ......

Drama in orbit: Brazen UFO attacks Earth's Sentinel-1A satellite

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: "just one of the many pieces of debris left over from the formation of the Solar System"

As Homer Simpson once said: "In this house we obey the laws of entropy!"

Fake Twitter accounts, coup plots ... Wacky Hyperloop One lawsuit turns it up to 11

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Amazing. You couldn't make this shit up. Anyway, I couldn't.

A plumber with a blowtorch is the enemy of the data centre

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: DC Deluge

In my part of the world that sort of contraption is called Unterflurhydant.

Paint your wagon (with electric circuits) but leave my crotch alone

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Or as my friend S.B. liked to ask, "how do you wear a pocket watch on a nudist beach?"