* Posts by allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

6157 publicly visible posts • joined 20 Oct 2015

Microsoft Germany says Windows 7 already unfit for business users

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Enough Whining.

"The problem is that Microsoft skipped Windows 9"

8.1 = 9.

According to the guys that brought you Excel.

Putting the 'Port' in Portal: Old-school fan brings game to Apple II

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Has anybody got the time and inclination to port this for the C64?

Search for MH370 called off after new theory about resting place is ruled out

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Sad, but true.

"Don't know" means "don't know".

Stanford boffins find 'correlation between caffeine consumption and longevity'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

No time for a lengthy comment, I'm off to put the kettle on.

Embrace the world of pr0nified IT with wide open, er, arms

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Often, marketing of these products knows no shame.

There you go.

Well, I'm off to get my Gotlib comics off the shelf - thanks for reminding me! And perhaps a couple of volumes by Manara.

LinkedIn, eBay founders and pals kick in $27m to bring Jesus to AI bots

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Sure... teach an AI about religion...

"Stalin and Mao didn't have a religion..."

Yes they did. They were called Stalinism and Maoism, respectively.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

I'm not particulary worried - it'll probably turm into something like this anyway.

Plusnet? More like Plus-naught: Mobile data on the fritz for days for some unlucky punters

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Totally off-topic tangent (TOTT):

I know a guy whose first name is Fritz. Not Friedrich or anything like that, Fritz. And he really isn't happy with the term "on the fritz". Maybe because I keep forwarding him news reports like this one, but who can tell?

Is! Yahoo! dead?! Why! web! biz! will! rename! to! Altaba! – the! truth!

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Marissa Mayer

Once she is out of a job she'd have time for writing vampire stories, or enter politics - you'll never know, she might end up in DJT's cabinet! Either way, it's win-win all around for 'Murica!

You have the right to be informed: Write to UK.gov, save El Reg

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

From the Johnny Foreigner outsider's perspective:

Seriously, Britain, what the hell is going on across the channel? You're throwing away achievements that vast chunks of the world used to envy you for.

Cache flush: AI poker bot to compete against top players in tourney

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

A system specifically designed for one specific task is really good at it - what a surprise! Okay, I'm not trying to ridicule the research. A lot of work goes into this, and a lot of good ideas emerge. But it's still a long way from putting the "I" in "AI". When the chess-bot and the go-bot and the poker-bot can play a game of Monopoly together without any instructions other than the rulebook that comes with the game, then we're getting close. When one of them comes up with a new game on it's own, we should be there. And right now we're not.

CES 2017 roundup: The good, the bad, and the frankly bonkers

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: "AI"

"If the IT industry wants to avoid AI becoming nothing more than a buzzword, it needs to pull itself together and stop over-egging the pudding."

Way too late.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: AirBar

"But it's a cunning invention that is unobtrusive and very useful."

I'm not saying that it isn't nifty and usefull, but it's too much like the HP-150 from 1983 to be a new invention.

TV anchor says live on-air 'Alexa, order me a dollhouse' – guess what happens next

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Could help reduce Piracy.

You've misspelled "privacy".

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Echo is perfectly designed and working as planned

Exactly. Amazon makes money by selling you stuff, and don't you forget it.

Anyway, obligatory link re speech recognition:

Burnistoun S1E1 - Voice Recognition Elevator - ELEVEN!

British military laser death ray cannon contract still awarded, MoD confirms

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Old tech

IIRC the project was scrapped because the tanks kept running over the extension cords with their tracks, but I might be wrong.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: The Usual UK Government Leaches Reinventing the Wheel

"Instead of enriching the usual financial freeloaders, why doesn't the UK government do a deal with it's 'best friend' nation (allegedly the US of A) and buy some of the work the US government has already paid for?"

Well, they do. F-35, Trident missiles, etc.

There, I'll bet you're feeling better already!

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Why do taxpayers have to fund this?

It's basically crowdfunding.

Only mandatory.

Without opt-out.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: FFS

What curve, exactly? The learning curve?

Banned! No streaming live democracy from your phones, US Congress orders reps

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: The revolution

will be televised. And corporate sponsored.

Robo-supercar hype biz Faraday Future has invented something – a new word for 'disrupt'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: batteries have a long way to go

Changing batteries in a phone? Now that would be disruptive.

Forget aircraft – now cretins are laser-blinding ferry boat crewmen

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Bah!

"I suggest any number of small islands in various oceans might prove useful for this purpose."

So, technically, Britain?

Cancel! that! yacht! order! Marissa! – Verizon's! still! cold! on! Yahoo! gobble!

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Where's the value?

Yahoo! still owns a sizable chunk of Alibaba which (on paper) is worth far more than Yahoo! itself.

Might be interesting for a company that wants into the Chinese market, or hedge against Chinese competition, or just cash in.

My guess is that Verizon know that they want Yahoo!, but also they want it cheap.

Slim pickings by the Biggest Loser: A year of fitness wearables

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: You can stick it ..

I'm just glad Hubert Farnsworth doesn't design fitness trackers.

Apple's CEO Tim Cook declines invitation to discuss EU tax ruling with Irish parliament

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: the committee received a letter this week

"Perhaps Cook is worried he'd be extradited to sweden on a trumped up charge and be flown to the US instead Oh wait, that's been tried before"

Tim Cook holed up at the, say, Indonesian embassy in Dublin for five years would make a great sitcom.

Back to the topic: isn't the usual routine to appear in front of the committee, read a brief, vague statement that repeats the positions you've already stated, and politely decline to go any further due to the ongoing legal procedures?

NASA plans seven-year trip to Jupiter – can we come with you, please?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Puny galaxy packs a big punch: A gazillion joules' worth of radio bursts

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Obviously it's going to be dim...

Thumbs down for confusing a comma with an apostrophe.

NASA eyes up supermassive black holes, neutron stars

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: anisotropies

Kinda beige.

The Zucker Mister Social Club: Facebook's daddy wants to be your friend, for realsies

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: One of the most famous people in the world.

... and as corporations can be people...

Speeding jet of Siberian liquid hot Magma getting speedier, satellites find

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Given how "fast" this "jet" moves it'll be all in slow motion.."

Well, given that Bruce Willis is over 60 now...

My fortnight eating Blighty's own human fart-powder

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: expensive and only moderate shelf life

Probably because of the foil bag; most of the materials used for stuff like that age faster (i.e. get brittle/porous) from the UV in the light. You can add other stuff to the foil to countermand this, but that's usually stuff you don't want near your food in larger quantities.

Dry, dark and not too warm is the way to go for storing almost anything.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Well worth watching. One of Douglas Trumbull's few movies as a director. Works a a movie, shows that you can do good FX on a budget.

Writeup on IMDB,

writeup on Jimbopedia,

Trailer.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Food is not only sustenance / licking your keyboard

Okay, who else thought "keyboard sanitizer"?

...which, as I have learned recently, is actually a thing. As are telephone sanitizers; at least in Switzerland.

Hackers could turn your smart meter into a bomb and blow your family to smithereens – new claim

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: FFS

Smart metres could be something cool, though... maybe as a new El Reg unit? Any suggestions?

(Or, failing that, how about a smart mitre?)

Internet of Sh*t has an early 2017 winner – a 'smart' Wi-Fi hairbrush

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"That manufacturers thought the idea was hair-raising enough to take to market is also revealing – some people seem to think shoppers will buy anything these days so long as it comes with an app."

The thing is - there are shoppers that will buy anything, even something like this.

Plus: free PR.

Win-win.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Well, the USB mug warmers are good for giving your cat something else to sit upon other than your laptop.

Apple sued by parents of girl killed by driver 'distracted by FaceTime'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Stella Awards...

There is an episode of Scrubs where Ted does that while driving Dr Kelso's RV.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Creeping Americanisation

"SUVs to ploughshares!", maybe?

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: suing God

Someone should write a song about this; off the top of my head I'm thinking maybe a little country & western style ditty by Eric Idle.

Mattel's parenting takeover continues with Alexa-like dystopia

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Share and Enjoy!

Yep. Only when the revolution comes, it won't be marketing that's first against the wall.

Also, the revolution will be televised and corporate sponsored. And at the end of the day about market share.

Those online ads driving you bonkers are virtually 'worthless for brands'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: The Register invited ...

That's slander. Vito Corleone never ran any rackets. All he ever did was to make people offers. Offers they just could not refuse.

Vinyl and streaming sales offset CD decline in UK music sales

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: a simple pleasure in flicking through someone's record collection

Hextable (n.)

The record you find in someone else's collection which instantly tells you you could never go out with them.

-- Douglas Adams, John Lloyd: The Deeper Meaning of Liff

Army social media psyops bods struggling to attract fresh blood

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

I don't get it - why don't they do what everybody else does and outsource to an Indian call centre?

Bitcoin breaks US$1,000

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: It's bad, the news says so

No protection without taxation. That's the deal.

Uh-oh. LG to use AI to push home appliances to 'another dimension'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Maybe the only slightly non-bad* thing about Douglas Adams' early death is that he doesn't have to see how very stupid people turn his satires about mindless crap that nobody needs into reality.

* I just couldn't write good in this context.

Programmer finds way to liberate ransomware'd Google Smart TVs

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Never had this sort of trouble with my old Grundig. Replacing the tubes was a bit of a bother sometimes, though.

‘Artificial Intelligence’ was 2016's fake news

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

"Nine years ago, the biggest financial catastrophe since the 1930s hit the world, and precisely zero bankers went to jail for it. Many kept their perks and pensions."

Technically off topic, but since a) Andrew brought it up and b) I'm in a somewhat confrontational mood after christmas with the relatives:

Well, why should there?

After all, from their (limited) perspective, they did everything right; in other words, they did exactly what it said in their job descriptions.

Logical conclusion: we're not looking at a financial crisis or a banking crisis or anything like that - we're looking at a systemic crisis. And nobody has a viable plan to get us out of it.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

BBC Interviewer: The sixth member of the Discovery crew was not concerned about the problems of hibernation, for he was the latest result in machine intelligence: The H.-A.-L. 9000 computer, which can reproduce, though some experts still prefer to use the word mimic, most of the activities of the human brain, and with incalculably greater speed and reliability.

Yup, let's party like it's 1999 1968.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: Helpful suggestions

90 out of 100 "helpful" suggestions by any software or SmartThingy are neither helpful nor close to what I actually want.

9 out of 100 "helpful" suggestions by any software or SmartThingy are totally neither helpful nor remotely close to what I actually want.

And whatever is promoted as AI these days won't make things better.

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Re: replaced them with an AI editor.

Would the AO have a SF* mode?

* Stephen Fry