* Posts by Francis Boyle

2739 publicly visible posts • joined 29 Jul 2007

SEX CRAZED FISH keeping hapless Southamptonites awake

Francis Boyle Silver badge

Re: @ Sir Runcible Spoon - Sir

Just don't try thatin the US. There, by convention, it signifies an 'attorney'. There has been at least one prosecution, albeit malicious, of a person who dared used the title in a state where they were not registered to practise law.

Long time ago? Galaxy far, far away? You ain't seen nothing yet

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You may call it Z8_GND_5296

but to me it's home.

- Grynklefyvth III

Deploying Turing to see if we have free will

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Re: Free from what, exactly?

Exactly. The (hidden) premise seems to be an evolution of the wobbly old idea that quantum indeterminacy can somehow provide a physical basis for free will (as if being driven by a random number generator in the brain looks anything like freedom).

The thing is, I'm most free when I can act in ways that are meaningful to me and those ways tend to be easily predictable by anyone who knows me. Of course, maybe free will isn't the same thing as personal freedom but if it isn't I don't know what it is bar a meaningless theological concept.

Snap-happy blogger babe posts catcalling blokes' mugshots online

Francis Boyle Silver badge

Welcome to the wonderful

post racial utopia that is the USA. </sarcasm>

And of course the only reason a women would complain about harassment is that she want the attention. (Sorry, I lied about stopping the sarcasm. Sometimes, faced with a certain sort of bone-headedness nothing else will do.)

Hypersonic MEGA METEOR pulled from lake, then Russians drop it

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I disagree

I don't believe that Elron even at his most drug addled ever believed the guff he peddled. This guy, on the other hand, I suspect is just a common loony who we'll never hear about again. (or he's a prankster in which case "well played".

Oz bookshop to deliver by drone

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It's been a while

but I seem to remember textbooks tend to be very heavy. Maybe they should go with octacopters. Even then I'm not sure I'd want to be underneath one when something goes wrong.

Murdoch calls for world+dog to 'expose' Google

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Have you forgotten

that in certain places 'liking' bicycles is a big no no and will get you on the register and in The Register

Google: Now your mom will try to sell you toilet paper

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Well, telling me what toilet paper to use

is just the sort of thing my mum would do so nothing's changed there but yes a good* headline.

*By definition not the best since it doesn't contain the words "FOUND ON THE MOON".

Samsung touching up ROUNDED, CURVY plastic enhanced MODEL

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Only if you're

Kate Moss.

Thai kids find free tablets hard to swallow as govt scheme hits trouble

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Re: What is the point...

I'm not sure what elementary grade 1 is but I'm guessing these kids are around five so they're not about to tap out The Great Thai novel any time soon. This is education for the 100%. Get everyone into the habit of reading as early as possible and everyone benefits including the 1%.

'Stupid old white people' revenge porn ban won't work, insists selfie-peddler

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Ah, his scumbag is

a leftist thug. You know, I was confused. I thought this guy was just another jerk looking to get rich off the misery of others. But that's just the American dream and how can that possibly be bad? But now you've explained that he's a leftist and a thug to boot it all makes sense. Obviously it's all part of Obama's plan to destroy the US and annoy old white guys. Thanks for explaining it.

Plastic ingredient FOUND ON MOON of Saturn

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What you don't understand

is the Register. And, you don't appreciate a good "ON THE MOON" headline. So what the hell are you doing here?

The LSD guru, the 1980s pop-star and video games to reprogram your brain

Francis Boyle Silver badge

A computer game reprogrammed my brain

Unfortunately it reprogrammed it to kill Stroggs which so far hasn't proved to be a terribly useful life skill.

Non flippant version: "reprogramming the brain" is otherwise called learning - if you claim it means something else you're talking nonsense. (Susan Greenfield, I'm looking at you.)

Reg readers! You've got 100 MILLION QUID - what would you BLOW it on?

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Re: Simple:

I have a problem with the ninja outfit. My personal army would be required to wear something more flattering.

Thorium and inefficient solar power? That's good enough for me

Francis Boyle Silver badge

Concrete

There's a thought.

Yes, there's a size limit to concrete vessels before wave motion starts to produce uncontrollable cracking but you're not going to mount your wind turbine on a replica of the Titanic are you? I'm not saying corrosion isn't an issue but I'm not convinced that with sensible choice of materials it is insurmountable.

And, yes let's get cracking with thorium.

Michael Gove: C'mon kids, quit sexting – send love poems instead

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And we know where he is

The scoundrel is hiding in Westminster Abbey. Dispatch the plod immediately!

OK, he might be a little bit dead but dig him up anyway and charge him forthwith. They did it to a pope* why not a poet. Can't have dead people making a mockery of the law.

*Pope Formosus for those who might care.

LOHAN hero playmonaut STRANDED on Spanish mountain

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Reminds me

of the cosmonauts who came down far off course and had to spend the night fighting off wolves with a pistol. Are there wolves in Spain? Did anyone think to equip the playmonaut with a sidearm?

Assange fails in bid for election to Australian Senate

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Dammit

So the revheads get a seat but those of us who prefer to keep our recreational activities indoors are left out in the cold.

Francis Boyle Silver badge

Re: "to build an exact replica of the Titanic"

Not really. Diesel engines and a full complement of lifeboats is pushing the definition of 'exact'. I think 'loose replica' is more correct.

The future of PCIe: Get small, speed up, think outside the box

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"without the pricey active cables"

and without the Intel control.

Torvalds: 'We're not doing Linux95 … for a few years, at least'

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Yes, cute

Which is why it breaks my heart to see them hunted.

Forget Mars: Let's get someone on the Moon – NASA veteran

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well, judged on the basis of the current example

the only thing we have to worry about when it comes to machine intelligence is a minor annoyance.

The Solar System's second-largest volcano found hiding on Earth

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I still have no idea how big this thing is

Can someone translate it into Tasmanias?

Mother/daughter team jailed for million-dollar internet dating scam

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Re: It shows many things

The fact that the real scammers have to hire dupes* like this is evidence that the banks are asking questions. I'm no friend of banks in general but wanting them to ask more questions looks to me like a case of "beware, your wish might just come true".

*unscrupulous, greedy and probably not to bright but dupes nonetheless.

Skype: 3D video calling is the FUTURE

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I hear they're getting

Anthony Weiner to endorse this.

You know it makes sense.

BILLION-TONNE BELCH emitted from Sun to hit Earth this weekend

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Re: EM radiation?

As a (lapsed) physicist I can confirm that it is indeed the twangy-wangy stuff that's the problem.

Alien antique show: Egyptians wore JEWELRY FROM SPAAAACE

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Sorry

I know for a fact that the mer-people hunted megaladon to extinction. They want you to believe that the mer-people were cute and cuddly and friendly (I'm looking at you Disney) but really they were viscous bastards.

DON'T BELIEVE THE LIES1!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Mind-reading MRI reads letters in the brain

Francis Boyle Silver badge

“looking up the answer in the back of the book”

That would be a valid criticism if the researcher were describing the technique as mind-reading which, as far as I can tell, they aren't. I suspect the real usefulness of the technique is likely to be in mind control (by, not of!) since I seem to recall that thinking about something is neurologically similar to looking at it.

Of course, it is a valid criticism of all those "OMG Mind Reading is Coming" headlines. I'll leave it to my fellow readers to decide if El Reg is guilty of that.

IiNet creates cut-price diffusion brand 'Jiva'

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Re: Jiva

No, they just use a rebranded version of the Silly Car Name Generator.

Tiny fireball exoplanet completes one year in 8.5 hours

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Don't count on it

The resident silicon based lifeforms would ban your "instruments of terrible freezing death". Of course if they're anything like humans you could still make your zillions.

Assange washes hands in election row

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I suspect it's neither exactly

but a combination of political correctness and pedantry*. 'Aborigine' is reductive. So we should say 'aboriginal person'. But people are lazy so we end up with 'Aboriginal'.

Now there shouldn't be anything wrong with 'Aborigine' but the fact is the word has a history - all those old well-meaning but cringeworthy references to "the Aborigine". Frankly, it's easier just to go with the tide and say 'indigenous Australian'.

*Assuming you don't just define political correctness as pedantry which I don't.

Attention, addicts: LEGO meth lab pays homage to Breaking Bad

Francis Boyle Silver badge

I'll tell you why I like the show

And it's nothing to do with wanting to be a "Bad Boy".

It's the ultimate deconstruction of American exceptionalism - the idea that people who are white and middle class can do terrible things and still be the good guys - the "I am not a criminal" thing.

OK I get that some people won't get that the show is essentially a morality tale - there's always people who end up identifying with the bad guys if the presented as anything more than cardboard cutouts. But you get that Walter White isn't a good guy. Try giving the fans of the show credit for realising that too.

And yes, the geek appeal of the show comes from the protagonist been one of us. But so are the Master and Lex Luthor - doesn't mean we don't get that they're villains.

Oh and while the underground meth lab is nice and super-villainy I think I'll wait for the Hot Wheels RV version.

Is NASA planning to send LAVA LAMPS to Jupiter?

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Nice room you have here

Pity if something were to happen to it. Or to the entire neighbourhood. Seriously, it's a nice bit of ad hoc engineering but I think there's a reason NASA keeps its centrifuges in concrete bunkers.

Plods probe death threat tweets to MP - but who will rid us of terrible trolls?

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Shorter "The Dude"

I'm entitled to threaten to rape and murder any women because some women said some stuff I don't like.

Mozilla ponders blinkers for your browser

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I was ready to complain

that this is just the web 2.0 filter bubble ramped up to 11 and then I was offered the delicious prospect of never having to read about the doings of the Windsor clan again. Add to the list anyone who's ever appeared on reality tv and I'm sold.

Curiosity team: Massive collision may have killed Red Planet

Francis Boyle Silver badge

Nonsense

They were actually SPACESHIPS! They just had a remarkable similarity to McDonnell Douglas F-4 Phantoms.

DARPA uncloaks unTerminator for $2 million robotics challenge

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Possibly

But with those goofy eyes I'm betting on it ending up looking like Bender.

Sleek Nokia Lumia details EXPOSED ahead of Thursday's disrobing

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Re: No expandable storage

Because it's not a bit of flash memory - it's ten thousand million bits. In other words, you get what you pay for.

Hubble spots ALIEN NAVY world – and it's pelted with GLASS RAIN

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"Catchily named HD 189733b"

But that's how you can be sure that it's home to some terrifying alien abomination.

LG's curvy telly and Samsung's Galaxy camera seen in the wild

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Samsung

Make the screen detachable. Connect it to the camera by wifi/bluetooth and provide an app that can control all camera functions and you might have something. (And remove the viewfinder. As much as I hate not having a viewfinder this is a case where it can reasonably be dispensed with - there's not much use for a viewfinder when your camera's up a pole.)

US Congress proposal: National Park will be FOUND ON MOON

Francis Boyle Silver badge

I assume

all NASA have been in accordance with the the relevant laws. Doesn't Congress/the President have ultimate oversight of all US activities in space? But what we're talking about here is discarded equipment. Does a non-functioning spacecraft sitting on the lunar surface somehow constitute an activity? In any case the requirement to make a law is not an authorization of any law. Specifically, if the law violates other articles of the treaty as this one does, it's dead in the water.

On another point, how could there be a world heritage site on the moon? isn't the Moon by definition out of this world.

LOHAN team girds loins, aims to take SPEARS to heaven again

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You can't fool me

That's Dr John Watson on the left - I recognise him from that documentary series. Good move, though. I seem to remember his partner was rather good at solving mysteries. With him on the case you'll have your playmonaut back in no time.

IT bloke inadvertently broadcasts smut on vast public screen

Francis Boyle Silver badge

Thought the description was a bit perfunctory myself

Clearly demands further research.

India's low cost tablet dream lives on with Aakash IV

Francis Boyle Silver badge

Re: Did Datawind forget the big brown envelope this time?

Cheap Chinese tablets are horribly built toys. I had two - neither lasted more than a few weeks in ordinary use before the screen was destroyed by a minor bump that any decent device would have taken in its stride. For educational use you can afford to save money by using last generation tech. Build quality on the other hand is not negotiable.

Brit fantasy artist sues James Cameron over Avatar world

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He's been trying to get funding

for a film based on his artwork for years. Then Avatar comes along and steals his thunder. I think he has a good case that he's been damaged.