Posts by Aladdin Sane

Re: Such A Wait-for-it

Better on rye with sauerkraut, Russian dressing and half a hundredweight of corned beef.

Re: Psssst...

Listen very carefully, I will upvote you only once.

Re: That headline

I'll admit, I was tempted to drop an Apocalypse Now reference into the comments.

Re: Travelling to client sites

You want to know the secret to surviving air travel? After you get where you're going, take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.

Re: Big demo. Should we test?

Like The Times crossword?

I never got ID'd when underage, only after I had turned 18.

Re: $placeofeternalpunishment

Hull?

Re: I'm planning aa marathon

Space Race was a decent docudrama.

Re: Is that all I'm worth?

That's the mean price. Who says you're worth even that?

Re: Sorry, but...

Have you ever met service personnel?

Re: Just follow Jacob Rees-Mogg ... is that OK?

Depends. Am I allowed to drive a tank whilst he's in front of camera?

Re: TL;DR

Anybody in the UK without an offshore account/portfolio.

Most people want to park for longer than 1/2 hour.

Re: I never paid any attention to the lyrics of that song.

Having played a brass band arrangement a few years back, can confirm it's a dirge with or without lyrics.

Re: " Nothing to hide, nothing to fear ... "

Hacker: How am I going to explain the missing documents to the Mail?

Sir Humphrey: Well, this is what we normally do in circumstances like these.

[passes Hacker a memo]

Sir Humphrey: "This file contains the complete set of papers, except for a number of secret documents, a few others which are part of still active files, some correspondence lost in the floods of 1967..."

Hacker: Was 1967 a particularly bad winter?

Sir Humphrey: No, a marvelous winter. We lost no end of embarrassing files. "...Some records which went astray in the move to London and others when the War Office was incorporated in the Ministry of Defence, and the normal withdrawal of papers whose publication could give grounds for an action for libel or breach of confidence or cause embarrassment to friendly governments". That's pretty comprehensive.

Hacker: How many does that normally leave for them to look at?

[Humphrey shrugs]

Hacker: How many does it actually leave? About a hundred?... Fifty?... Ten?... Five?... Four?... Three?... Two?... One?... Zero?

Sir Humphrey: Yes, Minister.

Same as people in the UK putting cream in carbonara, whereas in Italy that's a hanging offence.

Re: institutionally autistic

I can't even begin to explain what's wrong with your comment.

Re: Careful

Lana. Lana. LANA. LANA. LANAA!!!!

Re: NWA

If you don't make it through the meeting, you'll be up to your balls in crusty jugglers.

But why don't they just make 4G even faster?

Re: Call me a cynic....

Punchcards