Posts by Dodgy Geezer

Wf

"...If the IPCC ignores the enforcement notice too, the Information Commissioner will have the option of taking it to the High Court, for contempt of court..."

However, Police Chief Constables have been known before now (vide Jim Bates) to announce that they will ignore any legal instruction from a court, presumably because they are above the Law....

and in that case, the Information Commissioner might find himself falling down a flight of stairs, banged up for an indefinite period without charge and accused of being a kiddyfiddler on the strength of the photo of his daughter on his desk...

So...if I were to fart in a bike shop...

...they'd think they needed to junk all their stock??

13,200 suckers. eh?

Now that we have their names and addresses, I'm sure there are a lot of people who would be willing to defreay the cost of this abortive exercise in Stalinist government by offering to purchase said list...

And when we've pumped that well dry, we can pass the list to the NHS for psychological research on the ability of some people to live without actually using their brains...

Win all round, really...?

So we close down...

the European airspace at the whim of a computer model which has been proven incorrect, and now someone's trying to close down the Atlantic on the same basis?

Remember, the CO2 scare that we're just coming out of was driven entirely by models. Hasn't anyone noticed that these models are just plain wrong? All the time?

How the SS really do lobbying...

"...This week The Sun cited "senior security sources" warning that cuts would make an attack on the Olympics more likely....."

Cuts in the SS and SIS budgets would have **ck-all effect on Olympic Security. If anything, SS involvement would be more likely to inflame British Muslims and encourage amateur attacks. That's what's happened so far.

However, there is a way the SS could ensure their jobs are safe for a bit longer (after all the other WW2 countries have long since shrunk their spook services). They could brief up another war, like they did with Iraq and Afghanistan.

Korea again, anyone? We haven't had a war there since the 1950s, and it must be essential to safeguard our supplies of Lucky Goldstar white goods.....

There is going to be a lot of nonsense spouted about this...

..so I suggest that everyone gets a basic principle clear in their mind.

The offence of theft involves taking somebody's property with the intention of permanently depriving them of it.

It is therefore hard to see Jason Chen being successfully charged with theft - he seems to have advertised that he had it, and was willing to return the item in question.

It is easier to see Brian Hogan charged with theft - he seems not to have been willing to return the item, and, indeed, did not. He sold it on to a third party. There should be some consideration of whether the initial refusal of Apple to accept the phone lets him off the hook. If it does not, then a charge could well be laid.

If Brian Hogan is successfully charged with theft, then Jason Chen's position is an interesting one. We have seen that he cannot be charged with theft, but there would seem to be a strong case to answer that he might be guilty of handling stolen goods.

I look forward to some interesting legal shennaingans, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impossibility_defense refers....

Beer because that is the best companion to complicated arguments. It makes them seem so simple....

Simple statement....

I'm really glad she lost thirty pounds, and hope she spends a lot more in a vain attempt to get it back....

Please...!

...Let these be virtual police raids carried out by Second Life rozzers on a virtual home in the cloud.....

Not a problem...

"...beyond a certain point the Earth gets too small to have a jolly old way big enough to advance..." AC

Just do what the Brits used to do.

Pick a war with a small nation, preferably one with mountains around it to keep the war localised. Pick a nation which is small, but has a world-renowned fighting reputation. Examples might be the Irish, Zulus, or Afghans. At a pinch, the Scots. But not France or Italy. Nepal, certainly, but not Tibet, who would just gaze at you uncuriously if you drove a tank up their main roads and offer you flowers...

A small nation means that Treasury will only allow you a small budget, so it won't cost much. But fighting a warrior nation means you will have to work hard and apply maximum ingenuity to stay alive. Together, these provide the perfect recipe for maintaining a well-honed but low-cost military and a thriving weapons research industry.

The Israelis have been doing this ever since they were invented...

Ummm...

"...although the newspaper group does not believe any CVs were copied or accessed..."

Has ANY contract jobseeker got ANY objection to their CVs being spread around as widely as possible...?

Astronomical heads-up...

...his new black granite tombstone "decorated with a model of the solar system, a golden sun encircled by six of the planets"....

Looks like Uranus and Neptune are going to go the same way as Pluto...

Cashback from the government...??

"..The government is set to refuse refunds to people who have forked out good money for ID cards..."

Like the Lottery, the ID Cards turned out to be a tax on stupidity and gullibility. Presumably these were the people who were calling for more government interference in our lives? I can't think of a better group of people to tax a bit!

Although, of course, these items may command a high price on ebay as rarities? Perhaps the early purchasers were cleverer than we thought.......

British overstatement?

"This is the most radical programme of decentralisation this country has ever seen..."

It's actually very little. But the quote is literally true, because the country has NEVER seen ANY programme of decentralisation......

I have an idea...

...we could use a series of chemical explosions, suitably muffled by passing them through a pipe. We could arrange for these chemical explosions to take place in big metal box, with valves to let them out a carefully-timed intervals, corresponding to the speed of the car....

@doesanyonespeaksense

"..he broke the law - he admits it - there's an extradition treaty with the Americans- what's to decide..."

Um.. this is a game of pass-the-parcel.

Yes, there is an extradition treaty. Yes, the court case was quite watertight under the treaty. Yes, the treaty is manifestly unfair. And Yes, the Yanks under Bush didn't give a flying f*** about that when they were looking to justify aggressive action round the world.

However, NOW, it would be a huge embarrassment to both new administrations if it were to go ahead. BUT, as you say, the law is unambiguous.

SO, let us watch the dance as both sides start to tie themselves into knots...

Why not do it the classical way?

I suggest the Roman technique of decimation. Line everybody up and kill every tenth one

It has the merit of simplicity, the American gun fetish is already doing something like this already, and I bet it'll have a higher % success rate in eliminating 'threats' than any computer program....

I know nothing about this phenomenon whatsoever...

...but that doesn't stop all the other Reg contributors, so why should I be any different...

It seems to me that two or more people simultaneously confirming the existence and position of a stable ball-shaped electrical discharge ought to disprove the suggestion that it's all in the mind. Several people might have a simultaneous halucination, but hardly the SAME hallucination?

I seem to recall reports of groups of people experiencing this phenomena, so there's certainly people to interview. Get a grant application to disprove an idea, and them apply for more grants to disprove that which you thought of in the first place...

Troll, 'cos his hair's standing on end...

Looks like the best way to deal with this is...

a small utility that randomly adds dummy plug-in and font data to each browser interaction.

Then we'll ALL be unique, ALL the time. Solves the problem....

The person who cleans up the mess..

..is the next person who wants to use the NMR scanner.

That's how it works with the microwave in our office kitchen....

Can we now update the classic newspaper headline..

of the maniac who raped some people at a launderette?

'Nut screws washers and bolts'...

Thank you - I'll be at my desk till lunchtime...

Google is a company run by engineers

So was Penemunde.....

I have been saying...

...something very like this (with my professional Info Security hat on) since 1994.

Nobody listened then, and I don't suppose they will listen now.

The problem is to do with a pretty fundamental way humans operate. You may think in the abstract that it's a good idea for humans to live together in peace and harmony, making sensible balanced decisions about computer design and security, but in reality people live in a competitive world where you can't just 'decide what's right'.

You have to play by the rules of the social group you are in - then that group will support you. Start making different noises, and the group will drop you, and bang goes your chance of keeping a job. On the security side, a lot of people make their money out of security tools which add very little real value - but you can't say that and still retain influence with anyone.

Once you're retired, you are then free to speak your mind. And usually spend your declining years continually re-fighting the last battle you had before you left....

The FAIL is for humanity. I now know why intelligence doesn't often evolve, and has no survival value...

WTF...?

"..I still get emails from friends via facebook who want me to join, initially I didn't think much of it, but now every new one I get shows all my previous invitations, so even though I dont have an account, I almost do, due to my friends who have signed up, I guess all they have is name, email address and possibly a general location, but still more information than I would like them to have...."

? Also ??

A lot of my fake addresses get invites too. But none of my real ones do, because I'm careful who I pass them out to.

Does mean I have to scan a bit over 20 addresses every evening...but that's what macros were invented for...

Paris. Because I understand that she has a lot of addresses as well...

At the bar of Vulture opinion...

"...Intent to perform the act is required, not specific intent to break the law, surely?.."

I believe m'learned friend, Mr Justice Tech Hippie, has, with admirable legal acumen, precisely described the point at which our oponents' case fails...

Rem acu tetigisti...

Civil Service rules...

"...A Home Office spokesman denied the claims today..."

do not allow any comment of this kind to the press until they are out of 'purdah', which I understand is still in force.

Such a comment is obviously intended to defend the operation of this unit. This would no doubt have been minister-directed policy under the last government, and the civil servant involved would have been correct to issue that statement then. But now there is a new minister - Theresa May, if memory serves. Either she has rapidly decided to defend the last incumbents work (unlikely), or the civil servant concerned is speaking out of turn...

Civil Service geek icon. Should have a cup of tea....

Do you want a bigger story?

Not a lot interesting here...be more fun if you could hack the steering....

But wait! Aircraft are vehicles, and they have fly-by-wire steering... So put out a story suggesting that EvilTerroristsWho HateOurLiberty(tm) could take control of an airliner from a cave in Bora Bora, and you have your broadsheet coverage.

Or trains...no steering, but you ought to be able to derail one by taking a corner too fast. Or ships...or Blow-Out Preventers at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico....

spelling pedant

...make it akin to a physical Turning machine... (sic)

This would be Turing on wheels, I presume?

I think what we have here is a lack of communication...

"...The airport / police could have...not wasted time on this muppet that could have been directed against the threat of ACTUAL terrorism. The context of this non-message is an important aspect of these events, and the police really should have used some of their discretion..."

What threat of ACTUAL terrorism is there? Is Doncaster Airport a prime target for aggrieved Afghans? The answers I am looking for here are 'None' and 'No'.

However, we are paying a lot of people a lot of money to pretend there is a major threat, and check and search us whenever we go near an airport, or any other public place. So they will be OUT OF A JOB if there is no kind of threat.

Under these circumstances, if you were working for a security company and someone mentioned a jokey tweet about blowing up an airport, do you:

a) laugh, and say good luck to him

b) check it out, decide it's a joke, and do nothing

c) call out the Anti-Terrorist squad and Security Service, arm them and blow in the door of the unfortunate Tweeter, then haul him off to Belmarsh and add a tick to your list of justifications for your job. Next to the heading 'Ridding the world of Brazilian electricians'.

If you want to keep your job - vote c)!

I have uncovered your secret!!

"...we will of course bring you full coverage of the event, in the process revealing our cunning Vulture 1 release plan...."

That would be the moth-eaten weather balloon with the collection of shoeboxes underneath in the Reg car park, would it? And the pressure switch out of that old washing machine....?

Steve Jobs because he already holds all patents on the 'iDrop' technology....

The people who are really in charge...

"...The Tories moved motions against the US-UK extradition treaty calling for its reform in support of McKinnon during the last parliament, while LibDem home affairs spokesman Chris Huhne has been a long-standing supporter of the McKinnon campaign...."

How much would you bet that the Home Office civil servants will get their fingers out, and send him overseas quickly before a new administration gets its feet under the table...

Let me understand this....

"...the party argued in a statement this morning that had its poorly-funded band of men stood for seats across the country, it would have secured 90,000 votes nationally.

0.3% swing to Pirates - pretty amazing for a party less than a year old, well done all! Under PR that would be 2 MPs.."

So they have reflected their figures nationally to arrive at 2 Mps? That's nothing!

At home yesterday I suggested that the family vote for me. Out of a family of 5, I got three votes (myself, the wife and youngest daughter). If I were to reflect that across my constituency, I would have been in with a wide margin. And across the country, it would be a landslide. But why stop there? Reflect it across the world, and you're reading the a message from the first King of the entire Earth....

It is odd to see..

an avowedly anti-technology authoritarian party being feted by some Reg readers....

Register readers maths...

provides several figures for the acceleration - varying from 9 to 50 G

At least more people got it right than not, but this hardly reflects well on the UK as a numerate country....

If only it were true.....

"...They only kill those who cross British petroleum or Shell..."

What a lovely thought! A government department actually providing a service to corporate taxpayers!

Alas, it is very unlikely that SIS would get off their butts to do something for the UK generally. Everything they have done in the last 20 years , since the fall of the Berlin Wall, has been aimed at creating a new role for themselves and Security Service.

The prospect of unemployment once we had lost the Eastern Bloc enemy really concentrated their minds. And now, thanks to clever briefing and hand-in-glove work with the CIA et al, we now have a whole set of really helpful enemies.

Bit of a shame for the weapons industry that the new enemies don't require huge amounts to be spent on aircraft carriers and tanks. But at least there will be a lot of profit to be made in hi-tech pilotless assasination aircraft....

It needed asking....

What was the size of his instrument?

Inqusitive astronomers want to know!

(Mine's six inches, but I've only got a small one)

Fnarr-Fnarr....

This sounds like Astronomers puffing their findings...

Think about it.

Water vapourises off an asteroid. Where does it go? There ain't no winds in space.

It just sits there, bound by gravity to the asteroid. At some point the molecules swing into the shadow of the asteroid, where it's very cold, and water condenses back onto the asteroid. Hey, it could even rain for a while, depending on the temperature range, but soon it'll be 240-odd below.

Then the asteroid swings round again and we see the ice reflection. Of course the ice gets hotter, and then the water boils off. The cycle repeats. Simples!

Why has this obvious and boring explanation been ignored in favour of a much less likely vision....?

No, really, this reporter is good...

Her Bio says she was ".. program manager for Public Architecture in San Francisco, CA,"

Must be good, right?

Aha, but it goes on..." where she oversaw all aspects of their 1% Program, encouraging architects to give 1% of their time to the public good, pro bono. "

So, she was given an important-sounding job title, but what it meant was that she was kept well clear of doing any architecture work. She was probably in charge of the spread sheet which people reported their charity work to....

You've missed out the most important reason for attending....

The mugs, biros, t-shirts and assorted paraphanalia.

Lots of marketing geeks there, and if you walk in with a 'Head of IT Procurement for Megacorp' badge, you will come out with all the frisbees, toy helicopters and assorted IT peripherals that you need for the next year....

Oblig. Star Wars quote - Obi Wan fills in his tax return...

"These are not the breasts you are looking for...."

Why are there so many idiots around?

There is patently not a problem.

Yet people are queuing up to make 'authoritative' claims that there is. It's beginning to sound exactly like Global Warming....

What is it about various sections of humanity that makes them want to pretend the end of the world is coming? And why do the press keep reporting this? ?????