Posts by hatti

Mmmm?

I'm assuming there's some verifiable proof of who they belong to such as DNA tests and some of Adolf's pubes and encrusted reprogoo otherwise they could just be any old pants.

'Alexa, ask God to deliver me a Pizza'

on the increase

The future of tech dept is likely to expand with javascript frameworks coming out seemingly at a rate of one a week via npm. Possibly we're working to a point where no one understands how to fix anything.

The House of Lords wants to make sure data used by AI systems is not monopolised and the technology is developed on ethical guidelines.

And whose ethical guidelines would they be?

if($beer == 'all gone') {

getTakeAway('kebab');

} else if ($beer != 'all gone') {

drink(8, 'pints');

} else {

getCoat();

}

I'd need a crane

Rebrand

Poddy mcPodule face

much better

Zero gravity will solve the crumbs problem.

Shame

What will happen to all the virgins?

Softly softly catchee data

“It needs to be a conversation that starts with consent, rather than forcing people to do things,” he says, adding that a “coalition of the willing” is more effective than forcing boroughs to open up their data.

Digital word salad, what could possibly go wrong?

Its not like you can escape

I can't imagine anything more unsavoury than sampling numerous unwanted roast ghosts while trapped at 50,000 feet, no wonder a fight broke out. Urgggh!

next step

Facebook and Google = Team America, world police (f*!k yeah!)

fine with it.

"There's no recognition of how breathtakingly invasive this proposal is," said Emma Norton of Liberty.

This is no less invasive than being finger printed at a police station surely and saves time and therefore money to boot. Possibly Liberty's position on this is to ensure those that shouldn't be walking the streets are free to do so.

Governments calling tech firms to account for truth. How ironic.

No thank databreach you

Fnarr

Loving the headline, jokes write themselves these days.

cooked

I suppose United Airlines cooked her goose.

I will get my comfort coat

If it is going to be used for Pizza delivery, there will still need to be a compartment for the disenfranchised teenager to carry the Pizza to your door, otherwise you'll have to actually stand up and walk to the front door, then down the path to collect the cheese and topping savoury treat which seems like too much work.

Garments

Looking at the garments depicted in the tapestry, it is now clear how the 1970's pop group Abba gained inspiration for their on-stage attire.

If throw away the key were ever appropriate.

Lips and aholes

Meat derivatives from each end of the animal can prove useful it seems.

Spuds

Different type of chips

IMHO

Biggest problem with hate speech is where the line is and who gets to decide.

One persons hate speech is another persons free and fair comment.

Does anyone know where you can buy those black square masks?

That's not a dildo, it's a light sabre

Bit like

Black metal is a bit like rock music but without the rock and the music.

two words

paperless office

Should have used a Wotsits bag, schoolboy error

Word salad.

While I can’t erase the past, I can commit on behalf of every Uber employee that we will learn from our mistakes. We are changing the way we do business, putting integrity at the core of every decision we make and working hard to earn the trust of our customers.

The usual and predictable get out of jail free company word salad. If Uber are putting integrity at the core of every decision, how come they refused to pay for drivers English tests because they considered them too difficult, what happened to the integrity that day.

Apologies

Most of them are probably my tutorial 'Hello World' examples.

Sorry Github

Good skills

Must be a great pilot to tackle(geddit) such a difficult flight pattern. Fnarr

Not just the article itself

Even the comments section has been tampered with using the glib dry humour and knob gags (intelliphalus) algorithm.

You just can't see the join.

Post op

If you're thinking of having this done, you'll need to get some supportive underwear to stop things swinging around for a couple of days while everything heals. Boxer shorts have to wait.

Who'd have thought

The baby Jesus as a greasy savoury sausage snack? What fascinating modern commercial times we live in.

He's not the messiah

He's a very naughty boy with a sausage roll.

Like it

Putting the fun back into the commute.

I wonder if you could get done for drunk in charge of a jet pack. Imagining jet packed fuzz doing a sky chase with someone who strapped in and pressed launch after leaving the Dog and Duck.

Yum

Lovely, that would be great with some baconnaise shower gel and a side of cole slaw.

Getting peckish now

If this were an accident it would have been reported at the time and not come to light via a series of bizarre and unfeasible stories. IMHO Madsen is a revolting and monstrous liar. I feel so sorry for the Wall family having to deal with this, simply shocking.

At the F35 garage

It's not the parts mate, it's the labour.

Rockets Schmockets

That's all very well but when is my new book going to be delivered?

Utopia

Beanbags and exposed pipework for all Googlezens

two words

NO and NO!

They look just like wotsits but greener

Popcorn app

Some interesting choice for new mobes then, either one that bursts into flames or one that splits.

six months to 100k

Think of all the sec vulns

Allen keys and shopping in large warehouses coloured bright yellow and blue are to be avoided.

zero gravity

What happens if the flights get oversubscribed rather like with United Airlines? There would be a zero gravity fracas with folks spinning in all directions as the winner straps in for orbit.