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* Posts by Little Mouse

915 posts • joined 12 Dec 2014

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Powerful forces, bodily fluids – it's all in a day's work

Little Mouse

Re: Just the Usual...

A local VIP spilled coffee on his laptop, and when I opened it up to take a look, it had all turned into beer.

Truly, the Lord works in mysterious ways.

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Little Mouse

Re: Leaking barium enemas

Agreed.

But is it true that a barium meal is difficult to flush?

A colleague of mine swears that after he'd had his scan and been to the loo, the stuff just pooled up at the bottom of the pan, all dense and heavy, and refused to budge. Yuk.

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Hunt for Planet X finds yet another planetoid, just not the right one

Little Mouse

Planet X?

Shouldn't it be called Planet IX now that Pluto's been demoted?

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Virtual reality saves wannabe prison officers from actually, you know, having to visit

Little Mouse

I hope this didn't cost too much...

Ask any prison officer where any such money could best spent. I don't think this would feature on many of their wish-lists.

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Building your own PC for AI is 10x cheaper than renting out GPUs on cloud, apparently

Little Mouse

Re: No Brainer

IIRC - That'd be Tom Dick & Sally, The Three Bears & the 2nd page of Dennis the Menace.

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How an over-zealous yank took down the trading floor of a US bank

Little Mouse

Re: Unplugging the keyboard = kernel panic ?

Just a few days into my first proper job the unix sysadmin wanted to show off the insides of the shiny new Ultrix mainframe to me.

Unfortunately, removing the backplate caused an instant loss of power. Oops.

I learned a lot of lessons that week...

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Garbage collection – in SPAAACE: Net snaffles junk in first step to clean up Earth's orbiting litter

Little Mouse

Re: Partial solution

Nets are so indiscriminate.

We'll probably end up snagging some unfortunate space dolphins.

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'Men only' job ad posts land Facebook in boiling hot water with ACLU

Little Mouse

I've got the answer

First, we need a great big melting pot, big enough to take the world and all its got...

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Leeds hospital launches campaign to 'axe the fax'

Little Mouse

Re: Dangerous

"Most hospitals won't even confirm receipt of a fax. If you're trying to refer a patient, that's dangerous."

*This*

Been a victim of this myself, 5 years ago. Couldn't believe that a) they were still using (and relying on) faxes and b) that there was no checking whatsoever that the fax had been received. No formal handover of the patient's notes at all.

I eventually got my heart scan months later after a second, successful, referral attempt (which only happened after I actively chased it down) and it came back good news. It still concerns me now that others may not have been so lucky, and for such a stupid reason.

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Sysadmin misses out on paycheck after student test runs amok

Little Mouse

Re: "Snoopy characters"

Some ensemble or supporting characters sometimes just stand out and become the star, regardless of the creator's intentions:

Hawkeye Pearce

Bart Simpson

The Fonz

Arnold Drummond

To name but a few.

18
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You'll never guess what you can do once you steal a laptop, reflash the BIOS, and reboot it

Little Mouse

Sleep Mode - Biting users in the backside since it's inception.

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World's oldest URL – fragments 73,000 years old – discovered in cave

Little Mouse

Nah - I think it says

"E=m"

I wonder what's written on the next fragment?

13
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First it was hashtags – now Amber Rudd gives us Brits knowledge on national ID cards

Little Mouse

Re: FUCK

I came here to post that we really need a "Fuck Right Off" icon. But I'll settle for plain old "Fuck Off" at a pinch.

Please, El-Reg?

19
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Guess who's still in charge of your gas safety, Brits? Capita

Little Mouse

My house isn't even on mains gas, but I'm sure they'll still manage to fuck it up for me somehow.

29
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NASA's Kepler probe rouses from its slumber, up and running again

Little Mouse

Re: Send NASA to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave

"if all else fails, hit it with a big hammer"

In that one particular case I'd recommend the use of Maxwell's Silver Hammer*

(* Not to be confused with "Hammers" - A genuine medical technique for curing all sorts of ailments)

5
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Neutron star crash in a galaxy far, far... far away spews 'faster than light' radio signal jets at Earth

Little Mouse

Re: Hope it's true

"because energy applied to them just makes them heavier"

Very true, and succinctly explains why objects with mass can never be accelerated past light speed.

But I do remember reading aeons ago though that, according to the maths anyway, this wouldn't pose a problem to objects already travelling faster than light.

OK, so I'm nitpicking. But did anything ever come of this line of enquiry? Could such particles exist in the real world?

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Little Mouse

But which Time will be revealed?

Lunch Time?

Chico Time?

Tiny-tots' tea-time toy-time Time?

1
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Little Mouse

What is it with your bottom-fixation?

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Silence! Cybercrime's Pinky and the Brain have nicked $800k off banks

Little Mouse

Maybe they did... Are your face and arms covered in biro marks?

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Cock-ups, rather than conspiracies, top self-reported data breaches

Little Mouse

It's hard not to notice a bcc blunder. It can be less clear if you've been the victim of a hacker / cyber break-in, especially if the miscreant is trying to cover their tracks.

I wonder how many such intrusions simply go undetected?

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Black holes can briefly bring dead white dwarf stars back to life

Little Mouse

"the geometry near massive objects is not Euclidean"

Ok, I'll bite.

The bending of space/time means that space is "non-Euclidian" everywhere, but the effects are more noticeable closer to massive objects, and as close-to-negligible-as-makes-no-difference away from them.

There's no contradiction. The same effect is happening everywhere. It's just hard to observe or measure in most places.

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Southport: Come for a round of golf, stay for the flesh-eating STIs

Little Mouse

Re: Re : Indiana Jones...

If I remember my RE correctly - The Ark had holes for inserting special poles for carrying it around.

Maybe you could just pop your nob into one of those instead?

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Little Mouse

Re: Chicago

STI Journalistic Potential Exhibit A:)

"before your todger starts acting like it just saw the Ark of the Covenant"

Sheesh - some people are difficult to please.

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Security MadLibs: Your IoT electrical outlet can now pwn your smart TV

Little Mouse

"enabling the owner to ... turn the plugs on and off with a smartphone or PC"

Shoot me now. Please, someone. Just end it before it gets any worse.

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Hi-de-Hack! Redcoats red-faced as Butlin's holiday camp admits data breach hit 34,000

Little Mouse

Re: "responded to a phishing email"...

Does it really matter...

Clicking on a polluted link is one level of stupid.

Going to the trouble of collating lots of personal info and blindly sending it to an organisation that, when you think about, has no actual need or right to it anyway, is bordering on the fucking criminal.

It may not "matter" as such, but I'd certainly be interested to know.

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Little Mouse

"responded to a phishing email"...

Clarification please - Did some numpty actually send the personal details of 34,000 people to someone outside the company in response to a phishing email, or did they just activate some malware by clicking-on-the-link?

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Greybeard greebos do runner from care home to attend world's largest heavy metal fest Wacken

Little Mouse

Dragged out by the fuzz?

Ouch...

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Here's why AI can't make a catchier tune than the worst pop song in the charts right now

Little Mouse

They cracked this in the 70's

..with the Harrington 1200.

You've probably never seen one, they are very expensive.

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Samsung’s new phone-as-desktop is slick, fast and ready for splash-down ... somewhere

Little Mouse

Re: ...however!

Anhitnyg taht mkeas tnpiyg on ym milboe esiear snuods geart it me.

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By Jove! Astroboffins spot 12 new spanking moons around Jupiter

Little Mouse

By Jove?

By Jupiter!

6
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AR upstart Magic Leap reveals majorly late tech specs' tech specs

Little Mouse

Re: something that would be quite disorienting

Are words "real"?

Discuss.

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Security guard cost bank millions by hitting emergency Off button

Little Mouse

Re: Big Red Buttons are irresistible!

"Vas Corp Kal"?

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Smash-hit game Fortnite is dangerous... for cheaters: Tools found laced with malware

Little Mouse

Re: Can't feel too upset about this

Cheats cheat in games because they need to feel and be seen as superior to the "losers".

Fair play, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.

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The Notch contagion is spreading slower than phone experts thought

Little Mouse

"Because it's pointless..."

Not from a marketing perspective, it's not. It's a design feature that's also a fad, and hence will date very quickly.

And in the fickle world of phone-fashion, that means lots of users will "need" to replace their crappy old Notch phones with newer, more modern-looking models.

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HTC U12+: You said we should wait and review the retail product. Hate to break it to you, but...

Little Mouse

Deja Vu

Remember when all car ads from the 90's were the same? Just a long list of the optional features, that all the competitors also had? Air con! Central locking! Power steering! Electric windows! Yawn*

We've definitely reached that point now with phones.

*(These persisted for far too long despite a spot-on piss-take, possibly voiced by Hugh Laurie. "It has windows you can see through, and Doors, so you can get in and out...")

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Cops: Autonomous Uber driver may have been streaming The Voice before death crash

Little Mouse

"The crash has caused much soul-searching in the emerging self-driving industry"

Have they found one yet?

Badum-TSH!

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Don’t talk to the ATM, young man, it’s just a machine and there’s nobody inside

Little Mouse

"Don't talk to the ATM..."

Does anyone else have to bite back the urge to say "Thank you" when taking their cash?

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RoboCop-ter: Boffins build drone to pinpoint brutal thugs in crowds

Little Mouse

Re: False positives

"a group of people trained to evade ... detection"

You jest, but historically isn't this exactly how & why some Martial Arts came to be?

Hey - Martial Arts may have been outlawed, but no-one said anything about not learning to "dance".

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Little Mouse

Statistics

So it can correctly identify 5 out of 6 hostile actions, but a more important statistic surely would be how many false-positives this system throws up.

I could easily build a system with the same success rate, but that also identified 5 out of 6 regular actions as hostile...

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Capture your late-night handbrake turns with this 'autonomous' car-chasing camera drone

Little Mouse

Re: Stalker's wet dream

A panther that is positively pink? Think!

(Confession: For years I had no idea what they meant by "One hand only, truly original".)

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Little Mouse

I'm curious - What do these devices do if they lose sight of said vehicle, and are also out of range of the controller?

Do they just keep on going? Try to return to default location? Or what?

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Headless man found in lava’s embrace

Little Mouse

I've got the Looney Tunes theme stuck in my head now

Thanks for that, El Reg.

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Toaster oven-sized boffin box bound for Mars to search for life

Little Mouse

Apparently a toaster-oven is a thing. I had to Google exactly what though.

About the size of a microwave, give or take.

<edit> oven, not electromagnetic radiation...

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MPs slam UK.gov's 'unacceptable' hoarding of custody images

Little Mouse

DNA

"...an automatic deletion process – which happens for DNA..."

Really? The DNA situation used to be just as bad until nit all that long ago. When did things change?

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Big bimmer bummer: Bavaria's BMW buggies battered by bad bugs

Little Mouse

Did you also ask them whether the indicators could be enabled?

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Presto chango, crypto buyo: You're travelling like El Reg's gang of nerds

Little Mouse

Re: Really? This is bizarre.

When I visit, I use my credit card on the London tube. It works like a charm.

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Want to know what an organisation is really like? Visit the restroom

Little Mouse

Re: We need some ...

In Oz...

Yes - I saw simlar pictoral "No squatting" signs there 20 years ago.

I very nearly liberated one for a souvenir, but figured it might be a bit too - erm - contaminated. Euwww.

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Little Mouse

Re: We need some ...

Regardless of your opinion of Mr Dyson, the guy sure knows how to fold cardboard.

The therapeutic effects of deconstructing the packaging of one of his ball-hoover-thingummies shouldn't be underestimated.

I swear someone at his company must be a 10th Dan origami Zen grandmaster.

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Three-hour outage renders Nest-equipped smart homes very dumb

Little Mouse

Re: Did I read that right...

I already don't trust my kettle. It's already figured out how to switch itself off. What will it do next?

Maybe I should hide the knife block.

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NASA will send tiny helicopter to Mars

Little Mouse

Re: DRAMATIC MUSIC!!!

@MB - Let me guess - I bet you preferred Airwolf to Blue Thunder...?

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