* Posts by Nick Kew

2841 publicly visible posts • joined 16 Jan 2007

Joe Public wants NHS to spend its cash on cancer, mental health, not digital services

Nick Kew

Re: View from the inside

Then tell management what's wrong. Senior management if necessary, and write a detailed memo (the process of which will help anticipate possible attacks on your analysis). Discuss it with any colleagues you can trust.

If that goes nowhere, blow the whistle to the press! At this point, your memo is your chief weapon in being taken seriously.

I should add, I myself failed to do that at the beginning of my career. I just left two jobs where I'd been doing such useless work. In retrospect I regret my lack of self-confidence. By the time I hit 30 I was successfully avoiding projects like that.

Nick Kew

Hmmm. Not sure how useful paper is at performing an MRI scan?

Nick Kew

Re: Once again. Technology should *not* be a goal, but a tool to deliver what the people want.

Exactly. It's an entirely false dichotomy. IT is a means to an end, no matter what magic properties the brexiteers may endow it with in their imagination. Insofar as it helps the NHS in its goal of treating patients better (whether directly or indirectly - e.g. by supporting admin), spending on it is justified.

A survey that puts IT in opposition to the goals it supports is somewhere on a scale from disingenuous to clueless.

Microsoft sysadmin hired for fake NetWare skills keeps job despite twitchy trigger finger

Nick Kew

Re: Memories ...

Those were the days, when documentation existed and actually contained decent information. You could have three folders (paper variants) open at once, see the entire pages and still be working on a console ...

Where the **** did you work?

My overwhelming recollection of documentation in pre-google times was of the gap on the shelf where whatever-I-wanted should have been. Noone knew who had it, except that they'd long since left the company.

Online docs are a true liberation. Doubly so now we have desktops big enough to keep as many pages as we need open.

Nick Kew

This is why I hate agencies. They are in it for the commission, nothing more.

Never mind agencies. It's happened to my CV when it's been my then-employer (as a permie) trying to contract me to its client.

Client asks about $foo at interview. I reply honestly I know nothing about $foo. "But your CV says ..." "I've no idea who edited that, but it wasn't me".

We asked the US military for its 'do not buy' list of Russian, Chinese gear. Surprise: It doesn't exist

Nick Kew

Deniability, old chap

If you have a list, you're open to challenge. And your opponents might have deep pockets for lawyers, too. Awfully messy.

Bright spark dev irons out light interference

Nick Kew

Re: >If you want to parse Reg headlines, you need to learn to read from the tabloids, not Cambridge.

I did actually go to Cambridge and that's why I can parse el Reg headlines.

I did actually go to Cambridge, and it has nothing to do with my ability to parse Reg headlines.

I guess it's all about cultural context. Not a binary thing, just usages that are a little less familiar in forn' parts. Our perplexed 'merkin friend finds himself, like Eliza Doolittle, with the language but not quite the nuances.

Brits shun country life over phone not-spot fears

Nick Kew

Re: @Glen 1

@Voyna - surely Glen was taking the p*** out of the quote from the article?

I wonder how many of his downvoters actually read it?

Sorry, Mr Zuckerberg isn't in London that day. Or that one. Nope. I'd give up if I were you

Nick Kew

Re: The question is

You have to distinguish false news from false news. There's a Right kind, and a Wrong kind.

Though it would be way above my pay grade to tell you which is which. That's a job for the Inquisition.

Nick Kew

@Mark 85 - Not just taxes, also blame. Lots of juicy blame. Blame that's well-deserved, alongside general scapegoating. The former is limited to what they do deserve; the latter is unlimited. Kind-of, the role telly played a generation ago in What's Wrong With Society.

Not that I want to defend them. I've never used them, and I'm not about to excuse their Enclosure of the Commons. But I do find it more than a bit ridiculous when posturing politicians make a big issue of wanting one particular individual from a bigco. If we apply an IR35-like test, $company should be free to send a face of its own choosing to do a particular job - like answering to the politicians. Unless we're going to claim Zuck is the government's employee and can't be substituted!

MIT to Oz: Crypto-busting laws risk banning security tests

Nick Kew

Aussie Edition

We[1] are creating a separate Aussie edition of our opensource product.

Not that the Aussie law affects us at present, but we anticipate future versions of our product acquiring capabilities that are likely to bring it under Aussie law. So we'll need to fork a compromised edition from our honest product, to be prepared.

[1] That's a generic "we", of course. And the Aussie version will come with an IoT-enabled tinfoil hat.

Oz lad 'fell in love with' baby meerkat, nicked it from zoo, took it out for a romantic Big Mac

Nick Kew

Re: He got off lightly compared to Tufty.

The badgers will need a good PR firm to represent them. To most people, they're just giant cretins spreading TB everywhere.

News in the last couple of days: government-commissioned study finds it's mostly cows spreading TB. Not badgers. Which should come as no surprise to anyone given that TB is a disease of poverty and really bad conditions - which cows suffer a lot worse than wild animals.

CISA's Palace: Congress backs new cybersecurity nerve-center for cyber-America's cyber-future

Nick Kew

To defend, or?

This is Uncle Sam we're talking about.

Where do his priorities really lie? I expect that prominent among them are attacking the rest of the world (stuxnet? You ain't seen nothing yet ...), industrial espionage, and surveillence. And of course misinformation, pointing the finger of blame at scapegoat-of-the-day for their own actions.

Not that any of that excludes bona-fide defensive work against actual threats to them. Though it begs questions like whether staff will have immunity from the aura of fear created by arrests like Hutchins, and can they ever leave?

Six critical systems, four months to Brexit – and no completed testing

Nick Kew

Re: How about scrapping them?

@Len: hopefully Brexit means we can still have food safety.

That's precisely the big sticking point! EU food safety rules are exactly what the brexiters insist we be freed from. Because they're the US red line that has long stood in the way of a US-EU trade deal (and also a US-pacific rim deal). And a US trade deal is the only one anyone cares about that we don't have already.

That's also the Irish border problem. Once the UK is importing[1] the full range of growth-hormone-filled beef, all Monsanto's GM efforts, etc, an open border will mean the only limit on smuggling will be the capacity of transport routes from Belfast to Dublin.

[1] Not merely importing, but also preventing backdoor restraint of free trade in them. So labelling schemes that might be prejudicial to US imports (for example, Red Tractor) won't be outlawed, but will be cause for an importer to take legal action and win damages against a supermarket displaying Red Tractor if it can be shown to affect sales.

OK Google, what is African ISP Main One, and how did it manage to route your traffic into China through Russia?

Nick Kew
Trollface

Story needed!

Perhaps El Reg should send Rebecca on a business trip to Lagos to collect a "Who, Me?" story here.

Cheeky cheesemaker fails to copyright how things taste

Nick Kew

@Wyrdness - nonsense. We in Blighty have many wonderful cheeses: see for instance our superb local cheese shop.

And at the bottom end, I'd take a cheapo Sainsburys or Lidl cheddar over any of the Dutch cheeses sold in Blighty any day. Or for an outside perspective, I'd take the cheddar I could get when I lived in Germany over the Dutch cheeses available there, too.

(n.b. Happy to accept that good Dutch cheeses exist and that some of you have experienced them. A story like German wine? They have some nice stuff, but you wouldn't think it based on the crap they export to us).

OK Google, why was your web traffic hijacked and routed through China, Russia today?

Nick Kew

@Locky Re: Cui bono?

Is that an On Call?

Or might it be more a Who, Me?

Can your rival fix it as fast? turns out to be ten-million-dollar question for plucky support guy

Nick Kew

Re: Not just assembly.

> so when I inadvertently added 1 to the passed-in constant 5, all "constant" 5s in the program became 6s...

Whelp. My day was shit, but not THAT shit. You win.

Erk! That brings back a faint memory of being warned about that. Also in a context of FORTRAN, and back in my first job where - for the first few months before upgrading to a VAX - we were on a vintage ICL. I guess someone there had fallen foul of it too!

Nick Kew
Pint

One upvote is all I can give ...

... but you should be a headline On-Call, not a mere comment!

Bloke jailed for trying to blow up UK crypto-cash biz after it failed to reset his account password

Nick Kew

Re: A note to USAian authors

tedious pendants,

Yeah, hanging is just so passé.

My hoard of obsolete hardware might be useful… one day

Nick Kew

I *think* I can top that.

That is to say, I think I may still have a PCMCIA dialup modem. Used to be indispensable when I visited the parents, before they finally acquired broadband.

And somewhere there are bound to be things from pre-PCMCIA times. Anyone have a use for an EISA SCSI card? Still worked fine last time I had anything to connect it to. Only for those old enough to remember or bright enough to figure out setting pre-plug&pray jumpers.

If Shadow Home Sec Diane Abbott can be reeled in by phishers, truly no one is safe

Nick Kew

Re: Laugh at Abbot all you want

has obtained compromising materials on politicians -- material subsequently used to "influence" voting in Congress.

NSA? Good grief, they do make a mountain of a molehill.

Here that's the longstanding job of the Whips in Parliament. And in modern times[1] it's not just the whips, it's the political advisors too.

[1] Going back at least to the 1960s - and Crossman's diaries as used in "Yes, Minister".

Nick Kew

Re: RE: h4rm0ny

The question isn't whether $minister is competent.

It's whether they're cunning enough ever to thwart Sir Humphrey. Abbott isn't, so she'll be irrelevant.

Nick Kew

Re: I doubt she'll ever be Home Secretary, but...

I wouldn't be so sure. You don't run a city like London for two terms without being tolerably competent.

It's a job in which loonies get to shine. Hence both Boris and his predecessor - who also got two terms. Actually more, given his time as leader of the old GLC.

Dutch cops hope to cuff 'hundreds' of suspects after snatching server, snooping on 250,000+ encrypted chat texts

Nick Kew
Alert

Sending a message

If Dutch police have cracked this supposedly-secure communication channel, announcing it will serve to kill the channel and drive its users to an alternative.

As if Bletchley Park had announced to the world that they'd cracked Enigma. Which might have materially affected the War.

Dutch police presumably realise this, so it must be intentional. Why? It's a pretty high-value resource to give up!

Which scientist should be on the new £50 note? El Reg weighs in – and you should vote, too

Nick Kew
Coat

Re: John Logie Baird

But Gauss was a Kraut. So tellies in Blighty need de-Gaussing.

Nick Kew

Re: Thomas Midgley Jr.

Hmm, on the subject of the planet, how about David J. C. MacKay? Recently dead, but wrote the book[1] on what is and isn't realistic with renewable energy.

[1] ISBN 978-0954452933

Nick Kew

Re: Lise Meitner

Is the person who discovered the frequency of coincidences dead? Because if so, they'd be my candidate to go on the note.

Your candidate might be John Littlewood (1885-1977). See Littlewood's Law.

One of the mighty Trinity of ultra-pure mathematicians of around a century ago, with Hardy and Ramanujan.

Nick Kew

Re: Crick

See all the comments about Rosalind Franklin on this thread. With a woman championed by the entire Establishment on the same ticket, a mere man like Crick is a non-starter. If DNA wins, Franklin will be the face of it.

Though I still think Hawking will win. He has an aura, and massive name recognition.

Nick Kew

Re: 1+2+3+4+ to infinity = -1/12

Needs to be a Brit to qualify.

Ramanujan's mentor Hardy gets my vote. His work, proudly useless in his own time, now fundamental to modern cryptography. And his discovery of Ramanujan: interesting that an established great mathematician bothered to read the unsolicited work of an unknown Indian, as opposed to putting it straight in the spam!

I would also vote for Bertrand Russell, who might also qualify on grounds other than his science.

Nick Kew

Re: Rosalind Franklin

Nonsense. Franklin comes up again and again: I hear a lot more of her than of Watson or Crick (the latter name comes up, but only in the context of the institute that bears it).

Nick Kew
Coat

Re: Hmm. Obviously Isaac Newton

Wasn't Newton's genius in his balls?

DBA drifts into legend after inventive server convo leaves colleagues fearing for their lives

Nick Kew

Delayed action alarm

As a developer, I've been known to alarm people in the future with a log event.

Example: do_something() returns a status which could be OK, ERROR1, or ERROR2. So we handle errors with something like:

switch(rv = do_something()) {

case OK: // all's well

case ERROR1: // handle it

case ERROR2: // handle it

default:

log_error(rv, "Bug! This can't happen");

}

Sometime down the line, do_something() gets updated and returns ERROR3 for some new situation. Then comes the alarmed note in the bug report when someone excitable reads their log.

30 spies dead after Iran cracked CIA comms network with, er, Google search – new claim

Nick Kew

Stuxnet

How about a timeline correlating this to Stuxnet? That might give some indication of who was waging (and winning) war on whom at the time.

Nikola Tesla's greatest challenge: He could measure electricity but not stupidity

Nick Kew

Re: Anti-intellectual?

Anti-intellectualism has a long history. Just look at the story of the Garden of Eden. Or going back further, Prometheus. In a more modern context one could point to Frankenstein as a famous example.

And real-life scientists through the ages - most famously Galileo - have also suffered persecution for daring to contradict the Establishment in their time.

Perhaps what's more remarkable in post-war Blighty (as in Stalin's Soviet Union) is that "elite" has become a dirty word - among the very elites who govern and otherwise influence us. Though only when it suits them: somehow we didn't hear them sneering at the festival of the ultra-elite known as the Olympics the way they do about intellectual or artistic excellence.

Nick Kew

Re: Noted scientists

Why does there have to be *any* person on a banknote?

I expect Hawking will get it, and he is indeed a deserving candidate. Not to mention preferable to those candidates whose merits - though worthy - are secondary to matters of identity politics.

I shall make myself a lonely outlier by suggesting G H Hardy. His Mathematician's Apology was a seminal influence in my life[1], both for the way it shows the beauty of maths, and for its setting in the lost world of the academic elite it portrays. Deeply unfashionable of course, and his championing of Ramanujan probably just makes it worse, as that was purely on merit.

[1] It was one of main things that influenced me to study (pure) maths at Cambridge.

Clunk, bang, rattle: Is that a ghost inside your machine?

Nick Kew

Re: A real ghost story - Not mine

www.mumsnet.com dreaming about a man made of balls with a gladius (Roman slang for penis) .....

The ghost of Biggus Dickus?

Nick Kew

Re: Scary ?

The year is 2150, you are Bernard Cribbins and I claim my £5!

The £5 coin was phased out last century, as the value of a single sheet of A4 hit £100.

If you have inner peace, it's probably 'cos your broadband works: Zen Internet least whinged-about Brit ISP – survey

Nick Kew

Upvote for the home truth, but is it also in their T&Cs that they be impossible to contact when things fail, and even their high street shop will send you packing?

Nick Kew

Re: PN, donkeys!

I had that problem with Plusnet, but stuck with them because others in my experience were much worse.

Only left plusnet when another house move took me where broadband-over-copper-or-openreach wasn't available. Signed up with Virgin in my folly, for a long nightmare. But now on EE 4G which, like plusnet, is mostly-OK.

Nick Kew

Re: Virgin Media.

Because openretch supplied BB is even worse....

Really?

Compare and contrast When BT died on me vs When Virgin first died on me.

Whereas the BT line remained fine thereafter until my house move four years later, Virgin always had a lot of problems. And their customer support is inspired by Kafka's castle.

Budget 2018: Landlords could be forced to grant access for full-fibre connections

Nick Kew

Red Herring?

Something doesn't add up here.

I've had connections installed everywhere I've rented since my return to Blighty twenty years ago. Going from ISDN to ADSL to cable, and finally to 4G when it turns out a lot better than Virgin's crap. That's three homes and one office, all of them rented. One of them was newly converted, so I had to get a new BT line before I could get ADSL over it.

In each case, I as tenant arranged access. No need to trouble any of the landlords with it. Which is as it should be. Unless the service is included in my tenancy, it's up to me to deal with a provider. And it's pretty clear that the law as it stands permits me to do so, without having to trouble my landlord. Just as I can switch energy supplier. Or install a water meter - in my present home I let the landlord know as a matter of courtesy, but no more than that.

Just what tenants are these, and why are their landlords relevant in the first place? Is this something to do with communal facilities rather than households? Or a complete red herring?

Manchester man fined £1,440 after neighbours couldn't open windows for stench of dog toffee

Nick Kew

Am I the only commentard with exposure to the UK rentals market?

If not, why do I see no anecdote of being shown round a property full of dog mess, while the lettings agent claims he can't smell anything (and after the office has assured you "no, not shabby at all")?

Sure, our rentals market has improved a lot, and that sort of place is thankfully no longer the norm. But there are enough of them around that I'd expect most fellow Brits to have encountered them from time to time.

From today, it's OK in the US to thwart DRM to repair your stuff – if you keep the tools a secret

Nick Kew

Cars? Trucks?

Hmmm.

Being allowed to fix ones own 'puter or 'phone should be a no-brainer for those with the ability (with or without the help of manuals, tips, etc found on the 'net). And for being free to share information on the subject.

But cars and trucks are potentially lethal weapons. Get that wrong and you could kill someone, including but not limited to yourself. Surely if there was ever a case for the law to say Thou Shalt Not (or at least for regulating the qualification to fix things), it's there? With, as quid pro quo, a regulator with real teeth monitoring the behaviour of the industry.

Sorry friends, I'm afraid I just can't quite afford the Bitcoin to stop that vid from leaking everywhere

Nick Kew
Alert

Things 'puters get up to

One of these this morning.

Only it wasn't sent to me, but to a mailinglist I subscribe to. Which reminds me, I think most of these I've seen have come through lists. Dear <listname> ...

On the premise that these are addressed to an individual, that must be the list server itself rather than list members. Though the mind boggles either way.

Nick Kew

Re: and yet invariably

First one I saw was on paper back in the 1990s. Sent to the owner of a bar in Rome, at which I was a regular (one evening a week). He asked me about it 'cos it was in English, and he thought a native English speaker might have more clue than he did. Neither of us had a clue, beyond the good Italian and international word "mafia".

Nick Kew
Coat

Re: Think they mixed me up with someone else

Your secret's out. :D

Are we still allowed to make the distinction? Isn't that hate speech against someone whose appearance belies their self-identity?

Nick Kew

Re: Racist?

Down sir! BAD columnist. Fishing for compliments! You know answers posted here will be overwhelmingly either supportive or humorous - and even the latter collect downvotes (c.f. Frank Ly).

OK, on a more serious note, this would look racist if and only if it became a recurring stereotype of your unappealing eastern correspondent. Which would also be tedious. As far as I can tell, the only regular stereotype in your column is its author (and possibly his missus), and that's what we're here to read.

Having said that, I'd've left out lampooning the language. There's enough in those emails to make an article without it!

As for your editor? El Reg seems to have acquired some SJW police - possibly emanating from San Francisco. Your editor may be quaking in fear of them.

Nick Kew
Holmes

@Doctor Syntax

Re: historic Dilbert. How the **** do you dig those up seemingly to order? Do you just have a few favourites bookmarked and in memory? A lot of time on your hands to search? Or something fiendishly clever?

Damn, I'm setting myself up for a put-down here. Go on ... I can take it ... story of my life ...

Nick Kew

Re: I've seen a definite uptick in these

Don't try claiming that it's a unique gmail feature.

It was a feature back in the days when email addresses cost money, some people wanted more than one address, and neither security nor spam were issues.

It was a minor feature of my mail-by-web software from 1997. Back when webmail and other web-based office facilities like docs and calendars looked like a cool new thing people would find useful.