* Posts by Maty

714 publicly visible posts • joined 6 Jul 2007

Cops raid man whose Wi-Fi was used to download child porn

Maty

So ...

If my router is leased from my ISP, it's not my property and my ISP is liable?

Apple stuns Wall Street with 95% earnings surge

Maty

Xoom

This is going to be a good product ... in a few years. We went to get another (er ... is it compulsory to use 'fondleslab' here?) because the single iPad in the house had two people constantly trying to use it.

I really wanted to get a Xoom. It looks good, its more programmable and the screen is very responsive. But ... websites looked hellish on it, and one third of the apps we tried crashed - and that was on a store demo model.

Guess what we went home with - having got it at a lower price?

iPhones secretly track 'scary amount' of your movements

Maty

iPads?

Were these just bundled in to make the thing more comprehensive? Let's say I have a wifi-only iPad (as in fact I do). When this has no connection, I really doubt anything is tracking it. A couple of apps have asked if they can use location and been told no.

So perhaps it depends on which iPad you have. I'm more worried about my car's GPS. I'm SURE that thing is tracking my movements.

So, what's the best sci-fi film never made?

Maty

Heinlein

The Moon is a Harsh mistress.

'nuff said

Microsoft breaks own world record for IE nonsense

Maty

As if it matters

As long as the darn thing shows facebook and porn, its not like the average user gives a flying fork about what code the browser is running.

For the vast majority 'optimized to run native HTML5' is simply marketing babble, like those shampoo adverts that claim 80% more shiny hair with new added shinerine molecules.

Anyone who actually understands what HTML5 even means is probably competent enough to judge Microsoft's implementation on its own merits (and I suspect probably doesn't run IE anyway.)

So what's this debate about?

German prangs dad's £275k supercar

Maty

aaah

Appropriately enough, Schadenfreude is a German word.

CPS: We won't prosecute over BT/Phorm secret trials

Maty

'not in the public interest'?

Oh, it was very much in the public interest to prosecute - if we define 'public' as the ordinary people who live in the UK.

If we define 'public' as those public institutions that are very interested in intercepting the communications of ordinary citizens, and for whom a prosecution would have a pronounced chilling effect, then yes, the prosecution is definitely not in their interest.

Given that the CPS is naturally aligned with such institutions, their definition of 'public' comes as no surprise.

MythBusters: Savage and Hyneman detonate truthiness

Maty

dumb ...

What calibre at what range?

A laptop will stop a .25 at short range. (Heck, at over 15 feet a tough canvasbag will probably do the job). On the other hand, a Barrett firing a .416 will go through a stack of the things from a kilometer away.

Steve Jobs screws my wife (out of $944)

Maty
Pint

Google docs

*So my text looks like this.

I gave in and got a keyboard for my iPad. Yes, that makes it more like a netbook, even if it is a netbook where you can type with the screen six feet away. However, you only take the keyboard along when you are going to need it - as I did recently for an online chat session with work colleagues while I was out of the office.

But Google docs has issues with the iPad, because every time it saves, it puts my cursor back to the top of the screen and my text goes on from there.*

I'm using notes now, but will look at some of the apps mentioned here. Thanks guys!

Fukushima's toxic legacy: Ignorance and fear

Maty

Yes!

We have a clear leader for flame of the week.

Random caps - check

Deranged ranting- check

Fact-free message content - check

Slightly less coherence would have been good, but a sterling effort overall. Well ranted, that man!

Google patches Flash bug before Adobe

Maty

yet again ..

Adobe proves itself the Acquired Immunity Deficiency Syndrome of the internet.

Roll on HTML 5 when this company and its crappy vuln-ridden products will be obsolete.

Programmer gets 8 years for theft of stock trading software

Maty

Didn't Gordon Geko say

Greed is good ...?

How Google taped up its email outage wounds

Maty

tape ...

Has saved my sorry ass more than once.

Tape is not just for big outfits like Google. If you have not done so already, back your system onto tape and store it off-premises in a fireproof safe.

The thing about last-ditch backups is that you don't need them until you really, really need them. Back up, folks. Do it now.

Anonymous hacks Westboro Baptists during live interview

Maty

With Christians like that ...

The emperor Nero seems a more sympathetic character.

WikiLeaks boss labels UK extradition order a 'rubber stamping process'

Maty

Re-correction

Okay, Mr/Ms Anonymous Coward, I accuse you also of rape. Now you too can forever more describe yourself as 'an accused rapist'.

The best you could accurately do is 'I am subject - to having an allegation made, case dismissed then reconsidered, being allowed to leave the country and then being ordered back after all to answer more questions -that I am ...'

So nope, you ain't fixed nothin'

Apple names iPad 2 reveal date

Maty

inherent contradiction alert.

'Admit it. It's basically a chic games console. One third of all apps downloaded and almost all the top paid apps are games.'

So two-thirds of the apps downloaded are not games. And that's the best stat you have to support your argument? Or was it merely a rant?

My part of the world gets snowy and has webcams showing real-time road conditions. I can turn on the iPad, look at the situation five km down the road and be well on the way there while your laptop is still 'loading your personal profile'. (iPad goes from 'off' to 'web page loaded' in 20sec.)

And that's just one example of the iPad for everyday convenience. I could add half a dozen more examples but why should I bother trying to talk sense to you?

Conviction overturned for abuse images bought from bookshop

Maty

Police state?

A lawyer I know remarked that - for the police - a perfect legislative system would be one in which every citizen was in violation of the law at any time. That way, rather than investigate crimes, they could simply pick up the guys they 'know' are guilty and charge them with breaking the same laws that the rest of the population are breaking.

And that is the dirty bargain the British public and parliament have made with the cops . 'Make it possible for anyone to be charged with child porn. That way, no perv will escape (And don't worry Sir, that you might be guilty under the same laws. We would never charge a law-abiding citizen like YOU.)'

'While we are at it, let's make almost anyone guilty of terrorism, because we will only actually go after people with swarthy skins and religious beliefs we don't like. (Not for example, people walking on a bicycle path, or heckling the Prime Minister, oh, no.)'

I don't think it's a co-incidence that so many people accused (and acquitted) of terrorism end up on sex charges. Basically, if the authorities have it in for you the law in these two areas is broad enough to get almost ANYONE for one or the other if the charges are applied creatively enough.

Maty

If you fancy life on the edge ...

Look at Caravaggio's 'Love Triumphant'.

It's been considered a great work of art for hundreds of years. By today's standards, just viewing the pic over the internet should be good for about three years at Her Majesty's pleasure.

Of course, we could go back and retrofit all such pictures with fig leaves. It's a tried and trusted technique.

Three-day gaming session kills Chinese man

Maty

And thus ...

adding a new dimension to the phrase 'Get a life'.

Facebook reviews smut policy after slave site uprising

Maty
Pint

true patriot love ...

Actually, 'back shelf pokes' as you so colourfully describe them were legalized in 1969 - about the same time as in your native Illinois. (I note that a whole swathe of the southern USA caught up in 2003). So, no, that was not Canada.

And as far as goes my rather limited knowledge of kink play in the land of the maple leaf, I think the general rule here is that it's okay so long as it does not frighten the horses. So if you are going to select random examples, you might as well choose ones that make your point.

I'll take that beer though, and here's one to console you for when the Blackhawks don't make the play-offs!

Maty

eh?

"It is very difficult to legislate against what consenting adults might get up to behind closed doors.

OK. Canada and Wyoming try ..."

Why bring Canada into this? As far as I know Canada did not introduce the extreme porn law (without defining exactly what extreme porn is) or the concept of strict liability for possession of other types of porn. And isn't urinating in public in the UK enough to get you on the sex offenders list?

What happened? Did you get caught with a suitcase full of porn mags at Canada/ US customs?

NO-SH*T CURE FOR BALDNESS discovered by accident

Maty

even better ...

How about a pill FOR baldness?

Anonymous hack showed password re-use becoming endemic

Maty

Three parts

Have part 1 on a post-it note next to your monitor. A list with alphanumeric code and the name of the applicable site. something like 2Hc5i = ebay.

Then add half of old car number plate (or an old postcode, or a chunk of a memorable phone number or whatever). Keep this part in your head.

And finish with a common ending such as x1X, also memorized.

The post-it part is vulnerable only to those physically on site. Someone with physical access to your comp still needs to guess your other details - and even someone who knows you intimately would have trouble with the last three digits.

So an eBay password would be 2Hc5ihe5x1X , and although the corresponding amazon account would have the same he5x1X suffix, a hacker would have to work hard on the unique prefix.

'Suspicious toilet' provokes Maryland bomb scare

Maty

Flushed out the suspect?

I assume someone leaked the information of his whereabouts?

Or was it in the paper?

Dating site and hacker in online spat over security breach

Maty

Yesbut

the details of the 'hack' don't make sense.

'Krebs set up a free account on the site, details of which Russo was able to recite back to him'

-umm which details exactly? Presumably not the details which were available to anyone browsing the site looking for information put up expressly for that purpose?

So are we talking banking details? Presumably not, as this was a free account. Email? Home address? Or was it possible to pwn the acct - and if it was, why not say so?

I guess I could follow up the links and find out, but isn't that kinda what the reporter of this story should have done?

Memo to Microsoft, RIM, Nokia: Quit copying Apple!

Maty

Been in a university lately?

If you think that 'hiding' in a university is any way to avoid redundancy then you have not looked at the UK academic job market lately.

The amount of slash-and-burn going on there is hair-raising. And since the average "professor" is usually on a short-term contract, having to re-apply for your job every three years or so is standard. So you are right - most academics don't face the same risks as the average employee. Their risks are so much higher.

And, if you are a specialist in a very technical market, its not as though there are as many jobs out there as there are for, say taxi-drivers, (which is what some academics have become).

Do try getting a job at a university before you mouth off about it. And here's a hint - learn to spell 'destruction' first.

Gatwick Airport security swoops on 3-inch rifle

Maty
Grenade

how ...

...did the grandchildren of the people who fought in WWII end up as a generation of such abject cowards?

It's not the jobsworths at Gatwick who are to blame here - nor the politicians who passed the damn stupid laws in the first place.

It's the people who elected them. Our generation's unofficial motto is 'prove it is not dangerous' - even if its a 3" plastic rifle.

Hand grenade - to draw attention to the Reg's blatant and probably illegal incitement to violence by allowing the use of this icon.

NYT casts Assange as 'arrogant' (with a little 'Peter Pan')

Maty
Headmaster

nice rant but ...

>>"We live and work in a city that has been tragically marked as a favorite terrorist target..."

That'd be once, then. Not exactly a regular, favourite target by any stretch of the imagination.<<

Since the first attempt to destroy the WTC failed (car bombs in the basement) that would be twice at least.

Aussies demand Poms cough up first 'Australia' map

Maty

Bloody whingeing aussies

Whining that the umpiring was not right for them at the ashes, demanding stuff that's not theirs and never was ... reminds me why we shipped them off to the other side of the planet to start with.

Damn impertinent colonials.

Beeb say sorry for Stephen Fry A-bomb quip

Maty

er ...

This is a 'cleaver' attempt to prove Julie Burchill right, yes?

These days life resembles satire so closely I'm having trouble sorting out which is which.

Badness-browsing Belgian busted on Brit break

Maty
Headmaster

er ...

'....possessing indecent images of children while on a visit to Manchester.'

Shouldn't we be told why the children were visiting Manchester?

Chinese crack down on 'money-sucker' Androids

Maty

Silly me

And there I was thinking that Troy does still exist, albeit as a heap of ruins on the shores of Asia Minor. Pompeii is probably a delusion as well.

But surely Trojans are an orbital point in astronomy, or am I thinking of a US basketball team? It's surely not the wooden horse, because that was made by Greeks (well, Achaeans since we are being pedantic) and filled with Greeks.

However as the Trojans did not say at the time, timeo Danaos et dona ferentes. Don't these Chinese read Virgil?

Lawyers fear Assange faces death penalty in US

Maty

e.g.

Um, didn't they redefine their privacy laws a while back ...

a) To make it easier to intercept all internet communications passing through their country

and

b) To enable the passing of that info the the USA

Maty

The law ? Don't talk to me about the law ...

The CIA has to operate within the law, but that's no help if the government gets all elastic about it. After all if the British government could redefine Iceland as a terrorist organization in order to freeze their bank assets (they did, really, look it up) then defining Assange as a terrorist ought to be a doddle.

And torture is out of the question, though the US government redefined waterboarding as not torture, even though they themselves imprisoned Japanese for doing this during the second world war. So all they need to do is make it legal to apply the 'manual digit reshaping devices' (formerly known as thumbscrews) and 'readjust Assange's height specifications' (put him on the rack), and bingo, all is done within the law.

Or of course, the US govt could do as they did with Al Capone, and pass a law effective retroactively, which makes it a crime to have done something which was legal at the time.

But of course, this is as improbable as the Swedish government redefining the meaning of rape in order to get Assange extradited in the first place.

Isn't it?

Apple slapped with iOS privacy lawsuit

Maty

yeah ...

When I first got an iPad, I considered Pandora. A quick look through reviews showed that it required a lot of personal info which was totally unnecessary in functional terms. If users knew about this issue six months back, I'd be surprised if Apple did not.

Double-clicking patent takes on world

Maty

It's all a cunning plan

By the end of 2010 everything patentable or conceivable will have been patented. By 2030 or thereabouts, nothing will be patentable as all the current patents will have expired, and since those patents were so broad they covered EVERYTHING, the patent system will finally die an unlamented death.

(Dying, the act of popping one's clogs, was patented by me in 2010 so before you go to the great Sysadmin in the sky, don't forget to pass me my royalties.)

Prosecutors kick Phorm case upstairs

Maty

Dear CPS

Let me help you.

The law in question is called RIPA. BT and Phorm broke it. Prosecute them.

There, that wasn't hard was it?

Txt tax would wipe out half UK deficit, claims union baron

Maty

capitalists?

' They demonstrate an a (sic) fearsome addiction to money and attempt to create alternate realities and economic models which almost always eventually collapse or are simply reset and allowed to collapse again once the current disaster is a long distant memory...'

Oddly enough, that pretty much sums up the last Labour government.

Google revives ‘network computer’ with dual-OS assault on MS

Maty
FAIL

This was a tech guy?

"He also said he hoped this would put corporate systems administrators out of work because software updates would be made automatically over the web."

Because sysadmins do nothing but install software updates. Yeah, sure.

What planet did the Reg say this genius was from?

iPad to lose weight, gain eye

Maty

Ok, let's try explaining it this way ...

On a five day overseas trip last month, I used email to keep up to date with work, I watched my usual TV programmes, and a movie on the airport bus. I read my normal newspapers and listened to my usual radio stations. I talked once or twice a day with the family on Skype. I read two books and bought one more.

I found where I needed to go with google maps, and checked I was at the right place on streetview. Changing planes on the way home, I played a game of Civ. All the while I kept an eye on our web server, and though I didn't need it, I had ssh set up for emergencies.

And I used nothing but the iPad for all the above. It's small and light enough to just slip into my luggage. A few years back, the kit I needed to do all the above WAS my luggage. The iPad doesn't let you do anything new. It just makes doing it easy, hassle-free - and expensive. It is a very Apple product.

If you need it, it's wonderful. If you don't need it, don't get it.

Maty

Why ....

Does the Reg keep calling this a 'fondle slab'?

Excuse my Kryten-like literal-mindedness, but why should one fondle an iPad more than a laptop or mobile phone? You hold it and tap it, and if this is what Reg writers consider fondling, then perhaps they do indeed lead geeky solitary lives.

Death of ID card scheme left £6.5m of kit going begging

Maty

early adopters are a resource

Perhaps the government should leverage the financial value of the early adopter database to defray some of the costs of this white elephant?

I mean these early adopters are people with a proven tendency to accept information at face value. Think how much certain types on the net would pay for their details. There would be a boom in seaside property in Oxfordshire purchased with the money from Nigerian dictator's widows.

Meanwhile we - the public - managed to pay £41,000,000 for 'developing the policy legislation and business case' (a case which anyway failed in every respect).

We've all been mugus.

Bloated US patent holder sues 9 tech companies

Maty

yeah ...

"However, some companies have chosen to ignore our requests for good faith negotiations and discussions."

Rather as a bank might ignore the good faith negotiations of the men with crowbars and balaclavas who are 'requesting' access to the vaults.

Just because one is being blatant in trying to extort money does not mean there is any 'good faith' involved.

iPad 2 to arrive around Valentine's Day - Taiwanese reports

Maty

Ever powered up an iPad?

It takes like half a second. And in my part of the world, when I'm buying a coffee I access the net at the same time from the coffee shop's wi-fi, so the iPad is already out.

Mass mind control artist condemns El Reg to obscurity

Maty

Actually ...

*I* am the first to break the news about wikileaks on Amazon servers.

But since I got my scoop from an obscure tech rag reporting on how an obscure radio hack got it from aforesaid tech rag, it seems only right that I should report it here first.

US politician: 'homosexual agenda' behind TSA groin grope

Maty

alternatively ...

"Defender of everything that is upright and not part of a gay male's anatomy"?

Just asking.

'ALIEN' LIFE FOUND in California

Maty

the point being...

That this discovery doesn't show that extra-terrestrial life exists, but it increases the probability. Just a few decades back we didn't even know if other stars had planets (which most species would consider kind of a basic starting point.)

Now we know planets are ten a penny, and that life can exist in anaerobic environments. If life can also develop in different ways -e.g. using arsenic instead of phos. then it may be able to develop on non-earthlike planets.

None of this does more than increase the probability that we are not alone, but this discovery has significantly increased that probability, so IMHO it's important.

ISPs under pressure to control online porn

Maty

We've got the data ...

For about the last decade the internet has been an unrestricted all-the-porn-you-can-take buffet.

The evidence of whether the world is collapsing into moral depravity (well, collapsing faster than usual) should by now be pretty clear.

Have sex-crimes gone up dramatically? Teenage pregnancies? I'm cynical enough to believe that if there was any er, hard evidence that porn on the internet was seriously, or even noticeably damaging society, the dear old Daily Mail would have let us know.

OTOH, maybe some frustrated individuals can now blow off steam in front of a computer instead of pestering real-life humans.

Just a thought.

Indian village bans single girls from mobile use

Maty

erm

I can understand banning mobile phones for female babies - but doing so in the medieval period certainly shows forward thinking on someone's part.

Start-up offers frozen-pea-finding app

Maty

www.shortcrustpastrysex.info

there you go ...