nav search
Data Center Software Security DevOps Business Personal Tech Science Emergent Tech Bootnotes
BOFH
Lectures

* Posts by Scroticus Canis

735 posts • joined 2 Aug 2012

Page:

Crooks swipe plutonium, cesium from US govt nuke wranglers' car. And yes, it's still missing

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Facepalm

"... individuals – described as "security experts" ..."

Security experts - my arse!

1
0

Capita strikes again: Bug in UK-wide school info management system risks huge data breach

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Gonna be one less school soon

"Capita just really don't seem competent in anything they do!"

Oh I don't know, they do seem to excel at getting undeserved business from the government while screwing them for large amounts of money for shoddy products.

28
0

UK taxman outlines its CHIEF concerns for customs IT systems

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge

Re: I wonder how many codgers are still mentis enough to work on the 4GL it was written in?

You talking about Quick Build (QB)? Yep, it was a bit crap but good old COBOL worked bloody well with IDMSX under ICL's VME op sys. Still my preferred network-database.

QB was crap at multiphase transactions due to page and table locks being released at the end of each phase. Had to code your own lock system and needed the low level calls available with the VME/B option.

To quote my team manager on an ICL to IBM conversion (last century) "A small step forward for IBM but a giant leap backwards for ...."

It was hard work converting a nicely integrated polished suite of systems to a less flexible architecture. That's just the hardware and op sys aspect. The fact that IBM only did IDMS as a database meant everything had to be recoded as the were no eXtended indexes.

3
0

Cops suspect Detroit fuel station was hacked before 10 drivers made off with 2.3k 'free' litres

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge

Re: @jake - "... thanks for playing ..."

Is it that what comentardery is about?

I see that they have updated the article to include "US" gallons and correct the miscalculated litre values. Was wondering why Detroit would be using imperial measures ;)

1
0
Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

Re: @jake - "wimpy US gallons"

Well it's obvious they are talking 600 full-fat imperial gallons giving 2,728 litres as 600 US gallons would be 2,271 litres. So no need for us non-USAians to mention it! :)

7
1

IBM fired me because I'm not a millennial, says axed cloud sales star in age discrim court row

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Devil

Re: "Our leaders wear jeans"..."I go commando, what does that say about me?"

You own more than one pair of jeans?

10
0
Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: "What they want is partners ... not afraid to try and fail.

So IBM is now trying Crapita's game plan? Getting rid of the experienced employees is a great way of playing catch-up!

22
0

Apple fanbois ride to the aid of iGiant in patent spat with Qualcomm

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

"... naughty children with balls of yellow snow."

"Watch out where the huskies go, don't you eat that yellow snow."

(That line triggered a bit of Zappa nostalgia)

1
0

And that's now all three LTE protocol layers with annoying security flaws

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Meh

"5G will hopefully fix it"

And then probably introduce a host of new attack vectors. Ho bloody hum!

3
0

Not OK Google: Massive outage turns smart home kit utterly dumb

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

Re: "... 7 cats and one dog are all waiting ..."

With reference to your handle. Nominative determinism or consequence?

1
0
Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: "Unless there is a safety feature to override the lock?"

It's called a key.

1
0

UK taxman has amassed voice profiles of 5.1 million taxpayers

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: I'm one of those 5M

I'm just amazed that they claim 5 million people actually got through to HMRC by phone!

13
0

Office 365 celebrates National Beer Day by popping out for a pint

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: "Office 365 ISNT CLOUD!"

It's still fecking vaporware on the cloud or off.

0
0

Four hydrogen + eight caesium clocks = one almost-proven Einstein theory

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Boffin

"Homeopathy - Making Fuck All Difference Since 1796"

One of my favourite T-shirt logos.

"Everything is relative." "Oh absolutely!" - is another :)

2
0

Meet the real spin doctors: Scientists tell H2O to chill out so they can separate isomers

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Boffin

Re: absolute zero (-273.15°C, -459.67°F)

FTFY.

0 K would have worked.

0
0

Smut site offers VPN so you don't bare all online

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Childcatcher

Ummm...... Isn't TOR used for this anymore?

See title.

2
1

The harbingers of Doomwatch: Quist is quite the quasi-Quatermass

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Unhappy

Oh God ... I remember watching that episode on ye olde CRT TV

Strangely enough it was the first thing that crossed my mind when I came across this in the press last week or so.

I demand an old-fart-tard icon.

16
0

Facebook stuck with IRS bill after court tosses $7 BEEELLION appeal

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Meh

My heart bleeds custard for FB

Wonder what the penalties the IRS add will come to?

2
0

Zero arrests, 2 correct matches, no criminals: London cops' facial recog tech slammed

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Wot! - "Using Until is a presumption of guilt."

They may have been referring to the way the police work.

0
0

Shining lasers at planes in the UK could now get you up to 5 years in jail

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Terminator

Paveway LGB

I was thinking more along the lines of a 20mm Phalanx but a Paveway also works :)

4
0

IBM bans all removable storage, for all staff, everywhere

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Trollface

Re: "The only way to stop a bad guy with a USB stick..."

A Remington pump with a tube full of solid slugs works for most things up to Cape buffalo size.

8
1

Australian foreplay: Bum-biting in an underground hole

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Coat

Australian Foreplay - Whatever Happened to "Brace Yourself Sheila"?

Mine's the one with drop bear proof hat above it.

8
0

Pentagon in uproar: 'China's lasers' make US pilots shake in Djibouti

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Binding Protocol? - "is also a war criminal for targeting you"

That's nearly as comforting as being hit by friendly fire.

1
0
Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: "awesomely fearsome 200,000 µW Death Machine!"

Sooo... 200mW or 0.2W. Wow only a tenth as powerful as the "scary" 2W laser.

(I'm hung-over so I might have missed implied sarcasm in the dropped zero)

1
0

Microsoft's latest Windows 10 update downs Chrome, Cortana

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Devil

Windows 10 April Fools' 2018 Update.

FTFY.

4
1

Apple debugs debugger, nukes pesky vulns in iOS, WebKit, macOS

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Trollface

Re: "I let Fowler be my guide"

(6) DILLIGAF or is that covered by (1)?

0
0

Musk: I want to retrieve rockets with big Falcon party balloons

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Boffin

"100 per cent oxygen at 16 psi " would kill you fairly fast.

NASA used pure oxygen but at 21% atmospheric pressure so it was at the same partial pressure as in air, not at 107% atmospheric.

Still burns every thing at a higher rate and temperature as they found out when three astronauts were cooked in their capsule some time back. The very reason that the Russians chose to use just plain air at 1 Atm and take the weight/space penalty.

10
1

Surprise! Wireless brain implants are not secure, and can be hijacked to kill you or steal thoughts

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Unhappy

I'm beginning to regret my neural-net net now

Hub? Hub?

1
0
Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: "The lesson here,..is that security-through-obscurity is a dangerous design choice."

Actually it should be the first step in a multi-layered approach. Always laminate the armour.

2
0
Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Devil

Re: "Next thing you know you'll need a dolphin to get the information out !"

I believe the mice also have a solution but you may not like it.

7
0

France building encrypted messaging app for politicians

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Thumb Up

I got a 'U'. Beat that.

I got told by the French teacher to "never never darken his classroom door step again" after forgetting to go to an exam! Do I win?

Yep, I also ended up living in Paris (long ago) and learnt French in the Tabacs and Cafes. Crap pidgin French but good enough to insult the locals :)

2
0

Facebook admits it does track non-users, for their own good

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Blocking FB cookies - Firefox Preferences

Privacy & Security

1 - accept third party cookies = never

2 - keep cookies = until I close FF (so they all get deleted when you close the browser*)

*for the few sites where you do want the cookies go to the site and click the circled 'i' at the left of the address in the tool bar and set accept cookies to allowed, these will then be kept until manually deleted

3 - check clear history when FF closes and check - cache, close active logins, forms & search history and off-line site data (no need to check the cookies box due to step 2)

4 - Use NoScript.

5 - there are new options which also allow you to deny location, notifications, camera, and microphone usage.

Some data like site preferences (preferred zoom, etc) does stay but can be clear at step 3.

Hope that helps.

6
0

US, UK cyber cops warn Russians are rooting around in your routers

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Big Brother

Problem is that most home routers are supplied by the ISP and updated by the ISP.

Well I have had two firmware updates from BT* this year, last one on the 7th April, now whether that is a good thing or not I have no idea.

* presumably British Telecom and not Babushka Telecon :)

5
0
Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Devil

Re: Crying Wolf - @Mark 85

So that's where the the Orange Prune in the White House got the idea.

5
1

SpaceX's Falcon 9 poised to fling 350kg planet-sniffing satellite into Earth orbit

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Windows

Re: Well now, - Umm, maybe stay off the purple pills.

The dried frog pills are soooo much better ....

1
0

'Dear Mr F*ckingjoking': UK PM Theresa May's mass marketing missive misses mark

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Unhappy

The "public" or Open register is the cut down version sold to spammers.

FTFY.

3
0

Fear the Reaper: Man hospitalised after eating red hot chilli pepper

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: "And it makes a fiery ring"

Well it does come from the Puckerbutt Pepper Co. of South Carolina. No, honestly it does; and the guy who bred it is Ed Currie!

(the icon is a reminder 'not to' without a bucket of ice cubes)

1
0

Penis pothole protester: Cambridge's 'Wanksy' art shows feted

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Devil

Re: "Or a DIY enthusiast"

Given the handle it prompts the question - just how flexible are you?

11
0

Patch or ditch Adobe Flash: Exploit on sale, booby-trapped Office docs spotted in the wild

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Unhappy

Flash is good, the BBC recommends it so it must be!

Aunty Beeb still uses this for it's on-line weather forecast video (and other stuff) and recommends you install Flash Player if it doesn't find it; tantamount to recommending downloading malware IMHO.

Killed Flash on my machine yonks ago and don't have or need M$ Orrifice in any form.

1
0

How life started on Earth: Sulfur dioxide builds up, volcanoes blow, job done – boffins

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: Curse you, Noah Webster! - Well phuck'em!

Is all I can say to that.

6
0

Law's changed, now cough up: Uncle Sam serves Microsoft fresh warrant for Irish emails

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge

Re: Cloud Act ? ... F*ck yee-haa ...

FTFY

1
0

No chance of flying too close to this: Icarus, the most distant star seen, is 9bn light years away

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Hawking's Star? - Relatively speaking... ... Oh Absolutely!

More a quantum fluctuation in the Grand Scheme of Things but what beautiful ripples he left in our understanding; they will continue to spread for a long time.

1
0

Any social media accounts to declare? US wants travelers to tell

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Coat

Re: It's a good thing someone built a semaphore-to-Internet gateway then.

The clacks have gone electronic? Since when?

(where's the Wizzard Hat icon then?)

6
0

Tantalising Tabby's Star teases watchers with big dimming event

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

I do like how it got it's nick name

Let's hope the lady gets us some answers soon.

1
0

What the @#$%&!? Microsoft bans nudity, swearing in Skype, emails, Office 365 docs

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Coat

Re: It's a feature - Scunthorpe

So you can't ask Cortana "If Typhoo put the T in Britain, who put the .... in Scunthorpe"

7
0

BOFH: Give me a lever long enough and a fool, I mean a fulcrum and ....

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

Re: Just don't try it for Scotland and England..

Sage advice, a heed to the nose or a punch in the face do tend to offend.

4
0

Pharma bro Martin Shkreli to miss 2024 Paris Olympics

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Unhappy

Price Hiking of Drugs only in the US of A

It's not just this oxygen thief's fault that he could hike the drug's price; that action was enabled by the USA drugs patent system blocking the generic drug from the American market.

$750 a pill in the USA while 10¢ a pill as the top end price just about everywhere else. American democracy in action or inaction?

28
0

Brit semiconductor tech ended up in Chinese naval railgun – report

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge

Re: "What's with the fortified islands then?"

They don't sink like aircraft carriers and don't need special aircraft for take off and landing on them.

2
0

Bitcoin heist with a twist: This time it's servers that were stolen

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: 600 Servers = 1 truck and lots of muscle

The article said there were four raids not one. So say 150 servers each raid so not such a big truck as no packaging and also less muscle required.

I would also imagine they have trolleys and forklifts in Iceland which would have figured in my plans to do something like this; just like planning an installation in reverse.

1
0

Oh honey! Oxfordshire abuzz with reports of a MEEELLION bees stolen

Scroticus Canis
Silver badge
Happy

Re: I also use a brand with my logo - @Johnny Canuck

What exactly have you been using in your bee hive smoker?

1
0

Page:

The Register - Independent news and views for the tech community. Part of Situation Publishing