* Posts by J__M__M

245 publicly visible posts • joined 8 Jun 2012

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World recoils in horror as smartphone maker accused of helping government snoops read encrypted texts, track device whereabouts

J__M__M

Re: Just one problem with this article...

Americans like Trump can't read. duh.

J__M__M

Re: RE: sarcasm meter

My trusty sarcasm meter humped my leg then burnt my house down. My insurance agent is going to love this.

Let's see what the sweet, kind, new Microsoft that everyone loves is up to. Ah yes, forcing more Office home users into annual subscriptions

J__M__M

Re: Shameless RIP OFF!!! 32x price hike

And who says that the $49 subscription fee is cast in stone for the next 10 years...

The only question is, will It go up before they start charging us monthly rent to use Windows, or at the same time.

Microsoft middlemen rebel against removal of free software licences

J__M__M

Re: Subsidised & free MS Licenses?

You say that like there's no pain involved.

Time for a cracker joke: What's got one ball and buttons in the wrong place?

J__M__M

Re: Power to the people

The bad caps thing has been over for a long time, but that doesn't mean the caps still aren't the first to go.

Surface Book 2 afflicted by mystery Blue Screen Of Death errors

J__M__M

Re: Windows 7 to the rescue!

I hate to discourage the positive thinking, but that ain't gonna just work

'Frontline workers' of the world, unite! And grab yourselves a Surface Go White Van Man edition

J__M__M

These are the most unfixable devices on the planet. Want to replace a bad battery after a couple years? You have to remove 52 screws to get there, but none of the screws are on the outside. They used roofing tar or some such nightmare adhesive to put the two halves together. Oh, once you get to the battery, it's still glued to the freaking back of the case.

I was going to say think bic lighter, but the lighter would be far easier to fix so never mind. How about those ink tags they put on clothes as a theft deterrent.. it's like fixing one of those.

Which? That smart home camera? The one with the vulns? Really?

J__M__M

Yahoo?

One extra? question mark makes a sentence more difficult to read than an exclamation point following every word.

You! learn! something! new! every! day!

Lawyers for Marcus Hutchins: His 'I made malware' jail phone call isn't proper evidence

J__M__M

He then pretended to be the hero that saved the day by "discovering" the kill switch?

Stop being a jerk. First, he tried to remain anonymous until somebody outed him. Second, if you're going to set yourself to be the nerd hero, you don't code a kill switch that any jerk with a godaddy account and a hex editor can activate. He fully admits he stumbled into it.

But hey, if you need to dump on him to make you feel better about yourself, I guess that's what you're gonna do.

Off with e's head: E-cig explosion causes first vaping death

J__M__M

Re: FEMA? Why FEMA?

There was a FIRE at the site, too. Fires are an emergency. That's why FEMA was involved (the E in FEMA).

Uh, no. The governor of the state in which the disaster occurs must declare a state of emergency and ask the president for help before FEMA gets involved.

House fire, no. Volcano eruption, yes.

Happy having Amazon tiptoe into your house? Why not the car, then? In-trunk delivery – what could go wrong?

J__M__M

Re: Would love to see the look...

Note the YOU must lock the doors (it's actually emphasised in the policy document)...

So claim denied if your mechanic locks the door? Or the valet? Or the car wash attendant?

Stupid.

J__M__M

Re: Would love to see the look...

"For those unfamiliar with the ADO17 - imagine what you'd get if a chrome bumper MGB mated with a chronically obese Dalek - let Pininfarina loose on it for a while and you have the 1800 and 18/85"

While I appreciate your trying, it really didn't help so I'll just take your word for it.

You say Halo and I say goodbye: Microsoft has a word with unauthorised mod devs

J__M__M

Re: Release the game on Russian servers

Q: anybody know if Putin likes Halo Online ?

A: yes, as long as the mod lets you play without a shirt.

Washington (no, not that one) to pass hardcore net neutrality law: All ISPs in state must obey

J__M__M

This is flat out illegal

So is pot, yet here we are.

J__M__M

as long as they do not preempt the feral minimums

Washington State doesn't really care what wild cats think.

puff puff give!

$14bn tax hit, Surface Pro screens keep dying – but it's not all good news at Microsoft

J__M__M

the disgruntled surface owners website

somebody let the admin know they have been hacked. No, I don't want or need to install an updated version of flash, thanks.

I'll assume the grammar problems (unlike those found in the comment you're reading right now) are due to trying to type on a flickering touchscreen while in the freezer.

FYI: There's now an AI app that generates convincing fake smut vids using celebs' faces

J__M__M

well I'll bet this guy is kicking himself

https://www.theregister.co.uk/2018/01/25/college_nude_selfie_hacker_jailed/

IT 'heroes' saved Maersk from NotPetya with ten-day reinstallation blitz

J__M__M

Re: 20% drop going to manual

Beancounter: 'How much are we spending on IT?'

IT spending is what pays my bills, and that number has me asking the exact same thing.

Blockheads changing company names to surf crypto wave get a warning from the SEC

J__M__M

Re: we have spirit yes we do we have spirit how about you

"Complaining that there are too many laws is rather like complaining that there are too many lines of code in a program when all that's really needed is a "Do What I Meant" button."

Not exactly. Complaining that there are too many laws is rather like complaining that there are too many lines of code when the same thing can be accomplished using fewer lines of code. The user interface has nothing to do with it.

Unless you and your 14 downvoting friends are federal prosecutors, I'm pretty sure you missed the point (if you are, then you probably got it but don't care since you're more likely to be promoted than held accountable). If federal law is going to span 96 bazillion pages, another bazillion isn't exactly going to cross over that blurry line of human comprehension. We passed that one a long time ago. So basically either define the law or fack off. You can't have it both ways. The word "can't" rather than "shouldn't" is just wishful thinking to those of you still not getting it. Or denial. Whatever.

If ignorance of the law is no defense, maybe there should be an alternative. Defense, I mean. Or you know, like, fair.

The spirit of the law is a euphemism for ambiguity. Ambiguity is step one in the prosecutorial overreach handbook. Go read Three Felonies a Day by Harvey Silverglate (or some other helpful amazon suggestion) and get back to me.

I am not unreasonable.

J__M__M

we have spirit yes we do we have spirit how about you

If Jay Clayton wants to wear a cheerleader's outfit to work every day that's cool, but the spirit nonsense should end right there.

US federal law now consists of about 96 bazillion pages worth of codes, which together span nearly 34 zillion volumes. If the spirit part ain't in there, either add it in or let it go (preferably the latter).

P.S. If people are dumb enough to invest in a strip club just because they accept bitcoin for tips, then so be it.

Serverless: Should we be scared? Maybe. Is it a silly name? Possibly

J__M__M

Re: Don't care about how their applications do what they do?

All those people who used to write crap Lotus Notes applications are now 20 years older and in more senior positions....

You'd rather they were still coding?

VW engineer sent to the clink for three years for emissions-busting code

J__M__M

Re: Did He Have An Option ???

Until you go to court how do you know it's illegal?

You don't, which is exactly and precisely the point. People plead out instead of going to court for a reason, and this is it. Call it creative prosecution, prosecutorial overreach, or whatever... it shouldn't be ok for the so called good guys to pay informants and witnesses, threaten friends and family, "make examples" of people, and most importantly be free of any accountability or responsibility after the fact.

Hit them with what they deserve, but do it without being worse human beings than they are (too much to ask).

J__M__M

the asshole test

If you ever find yourself "making an example of" anyone but your own damn kids, guess what?

I say this knowing full well my uninformed knee-jerk reaction might mean I'm also an asshole, but at least I didn't destroy anyone in the process. I'll click-through now... and if it turns out I'm wrong I'll drop back in to admit exactly that (unlike any federal prosecutor that ever lived).

Oldest flying 747 finally grounded, 47 years after first flight

J__M__M

Re: A venerable workhorse

Of course there were cases of 4-engined aircraft losing all 4 engines - the most famous being the BA 747 being flown by Capt Ron Moody through a cloud of volcanic ash - but there are very few.

Eric Moody, not Ron. And he made the best in flight emergency announcement in the history of aviation, by the way.

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress"

Private sub captain changes story, now says reporter died, was 'buried at sea' – torso found

J__M__M

Personally

I would never get in any submarine. Ever. Screw that.

NASA agent faces heat for 'degrading' moon rock sting during which grandmother wet herself

J__M__M

Re: Not again...

Could you please step outside for a moment? If you live in a quiet neighborhood, don't mind the very faint buzzing noise overhead.

Smart guns are a neat idea on paper. They'll never survive reality

J__M__M

Re: 'Smart guns' - an inherent failure

Why is it everyone outside the USA can see what the problem and solution is, but is seems no one inside the USA can?

One possibility might be that you aren't as smart as you think. Do you know how to unring a bell? How about 400+ million of them? Japan has restricted gun ownership since the 16th century and banned them flat out since WWII. In other words there weren't any guns there in the first place, so shut the hell up about Japan already.

And please let us know when you smart guys decide to come down off your high horse and invent a time machine. We'd like to book a seat on the first available flight back to when the 2nd amendment was still relevant to the discussion (about 399,999,999 guns ago).

P.S. Rather than a show of hands, please just click the downvote icon to indicate your lack perspective. Thank you.

Apple kills activation lock check, possible dirty stolen device hack

J__M__M

Seriously, whoseyourdaddy? Better glue next time?

No glue next time, I'm sure you meant to say (repairability and whatnot)...

Cisco emits new branch box

J__M__M

Re: Sales pitch

"but it really sucks hard that now you have a box that is actually capable of much faster speeds with no features enabled, that sits idle under max rated throughput because it is now crippled by a license."

Host/user count licensing is better? I'd rather go slow than not at all.

Boffins predict web scams with domain registration data

J__M__M

Re: Stats Error!

And 100% of those false positives deserve it. Why? Because they picked a shitty domain name.

Like it or not, here are ALL your October Microsoft patches

J__M__M

Re: Dear Microsoft.

Signed, a pissed off MS customer whom has a lawyer who, sorry whom, would laugh at working on a contingency basis so I'd be looking at $200 an hour billed in 15 min increments for every email, fax, and phone call he can dream up.

Good luck with that.

Ludicrous Patent of the Week: Rectangles on a computer screen

J__M__M

now hiring coders for new OS development

I need a couple dozen devs willing to work for peanuts now and filthy effing rich compensation levels later on, and I need them asap. I'm not going to get into the details here, but suffice it to say my new operating system, Portholes 3.1, will be virtually litigation proof. Or at least as far as this scumbag patent troll jerkoff a-hole in the article is concerned, anyway (which is almost reason enough by itself).

⌘+c malware smacks Macs, drains keychains, pours over Tor

J__M__M

No, you were premature (that's what she said).

"Always avoided using Keychain with any Apple branded stuff. Was I right?"

"Keydnap isn't exploiting OS X-level bugs, and default Macs are protected by security settings"

Is Windows 10 ignoring sysadmins' network QoS settings?

J__M__M

a quiz

Right now I have 6 vm's running on this machine... guess which one just can't seem to shut up until I remove the default gateway or otherwise kill it's internet access?

1. Win 7

2. Win 7

3. Win XP

4. Server 2008

5. Server 2012R2 Core

6. Win 10

Computerised stock management? Nah, let’s use walkie-talkies

J__M__M

yeah, right

So if they would have been computer-eyes-duh, it would have been a very similar story with the exact same net result.

Says we have four pair in stock... huh, that's weird.

US military tests massive GPS jamming weapon over California

J__M__M

Re: @Gray ... Military aggression

They have always had control.... everything but the OFF button, anyway.

J__M__M

uh, whut?

"The lack of ground jamming indicates that the device is airborne and the increasing size of the jamming cone at higher altitudes suggests a very powerful device indeed"

I'm no rocket surgeon, but wouldn't this indicate it's pointing up (and not much else)?

Surface Book nightmare: Microsoft won't fix 'Sleep of Death' bug

J__M__M

Re: You cannot install another OS on the Surface Pro

One more time: his problem is with Secure Boot, not UEFI...

No, his problem is with Microsoft. Downvote away, you pussies.

Microsoft won't back down from Windows 10 nagware 'trick'

J__M__M

Re: My opinion on this?

The problem is, your opinion does not matter anymore. MS flat out sucks it.

Seattle Suehawks: Smart meter hush-up launched because, er ... terrorism

J__M__M

Re: Security?

If you hire a contractor that isn't worried, both you and the contractor should be fired.

------

They clearly aren't very confident about how well they wrote their software then, if they're worried that it's vulnerable to terrorists. Someone ought to push for an independent review of it all, just in case, before they're allowed to deploy the network.

------

J__M__M

Yep? Try nope.

Hey popular know it all comment guy, unless you and your 27 friends would like to post your full, complete, and unredacted network documentation right here for everyone to see, you are full of crap.

Not fit for the purpose? Whatever. You're not fit for the purpose.

And don't call me shoeless.

Apple pulls iPad BrickWare

J__M__M

don't even

With the way you guys are cramming updates down our throats these days, if you brick anything of mine, well, your stores sure do have a lot of glass and, well, bricks will be bricks. Not really. Really. No, not really. Well, you never know.

Seriously, I'm not going to upgrade my damn phone when I'm 3000 miles away from home, you egotistical effing morons. So shove off.

How to not get pwned on Windows: Don't run any virtual machines, open any web pages, Office docs, hyperlinks ...

J__M__M

Would it really that effing hard?

for MS to include this sort of info in the general vicinity of the freaking update window? You know, were you see the list of updates they want you to install. I hate Microsoft. Why? Because I can't avoid them and they suck.

Cisco says CLI becoming interface of last resort

J__M__M

the real reason

People don't like CLI's because they can't fake it. You know it or you don't.

J__M__M

Re: History repeats itself

"In my own experience,the introduction of GUIs for use by DBAs ..."

DBAs aren't network engineers...

And even if they were, this take would be totally and completely wrong. GUI's on network equipment just flat out sucks it, so help me God.

Cisco's gone soft: Networking giant tries to wean IT bods off boxes

J__M__M

Re: Oh, look!

Cisco has been claiming they are a software and not a hardware company since the stone age (if I remember correctly). Wrong then, wrong now.

LA hospital coughs up $17,000 to free PCs held to ransom by hackers

J__M__M

Re: bovine fecal matter!

this points to exactly a failed backup and recovery methodology...

Maybe, not exactly. Unless a lot more than one user clicked the wrong thing at the same time, the principal of least privilege failure comes first, then the disaster recovery failure.

But there were probably a few more before either one.

Reluctant Wikipedia lifts lid on $2.5m internet search engine project

J__M__M

4 easy steps

1. provide a discussion group filter option

2. don't ignore +'s -'s, or double quotes

3. don't give 1 & 2 only to take away later on (for my own good or otherwise).

4. win

Parallels opens new Windows with app virtualistion upgrade

J__M__M

Zubarev is betting... lower price tags will lure mid-market organisations.

Lower price tags-- right up until a version or two from now when he:

1. removes core functionality

2 adds a handful of synthetic barriers

3. kills the perpetual license option in favor of annual rent at twice the price.

Hey Zubarev or whoever, if you need to raise prices then do it, but don't be effing weasels about it. Whoops, too late.

Hacker predicts AMEX card numbers, bypasses chip and PIN

J__M__M

All I know for sure is this guy, Samy Kamkar, is a better person than me.

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