* Posts by Bob Vistakin

1578 publicly visible posts • joined 24 Dec 2011

Apple is granted a patent on the rectangle. No, really

Bob Vistakin
Big Brother

Re: Can't go on forever

The patent system is preventing evil idea stealers from such innovations as chucking a stick for your dog to fetch back too: http://www.google.com/patents/US6360693

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

Re: It's called a DESIGN patent for a reason...

No need - just refer to its video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQ8pQVDyaLo

Nokia Lumia 920 Windows Phone 8 handset review

Bob Vistakin
Devil

Re: Notifications

@Kristian Do these "many people in the world" include Microsofts former mobile "partners"?

http://www.asymco.com/2011/02/11/in-memoriam-microsofts-previous-strategic-mobile-partners/

Bob Vistakin
Big Brother

Re: Spyware

Careful - you're liable to get a lecture on your life's experiences for saying stuff like that round here.

Bob Vistakin
Linux

Re: Notifications

No, and the fact they aren't present shows the software is half done as they claim to be coming later. What you get now is this half-assed fail, cynically rushed out in time for Christmas in the bizarre hope someone will not mind being forced to use ee and their comedy tariffs.

It's a prefect example of exactly what Nokia pre-Microsoft would never release in a million years. Nor need to fake crowds outside stores, or fake photos to market it or flood online forums with shills in order to astroturf interest etc.

Bob Vistakin
FAIL

With such a great camera why fake the pictures then?

http://www.gsmarena.com/nokia_lumia_920_sample_images_found_to_be_fake_as_well-news-4769.php

Apple kicked out of China smartphone top 5 by, er, Yulong and pals

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Re: Even the most brainwashed iSheep can see the pattern now

Better stock up on ammo - there's truckloads more messengers need shooting:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/11/08/canalys_q3_china_apple_sixth_place/

http://gulfnews.com/business/media-marketing/android-now-has-as-many-apps-as-ios-report-1.1100553

http://news.cnet.com/8301-13579_3-57546777-37/bond-guru-predicts-apples-stock-price-will-fall-to-$425/

http://www.indeed.com/jobtrends?q=Android%2Cios&relative=1&relative=1

Bob Vistakin
Mushroom

Even the most brainwashed iSheep can see the pattern now

http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2012/nov/07/peak-apple

Judge denies move to ban ad-skipping DVR

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

See what happens when he loses his inside man

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-19472688

Apple tries to add Galaxy Note, Jelly Bean to patent slapfest

Bob Vistakin
Big Brother

Re: Pathetic..

@Greg J Preece

I'll take your two words and raise you Widgets and NFC.

And don't forget 4.2's multi user capabilities. The Cupertino photocopiers no doubt started with the usual mad scramble when that was announced and might hit iOS next year - all nice and ready for Apple to sue everyone for it the year after. And they'll once again use the best courts money can buy, natch.

Bob Vistakin
Happy

Re: So much evidence Apple has lost the plot

One more thing:

http://techcrunch.com/2012/11/07/u-s-court-orders-apple-to-pay-368-million-damages-for-facetime-patent-infringement/

Bob Vistakin
Unhappy

Re: Judge Koh won't throw this out...

Tis now but a short leap before kids are taught Apple invented the mobile phone itself. Once that lie is also repeated enough, as these current rounded corner ones are, we'll see some Texan court they bought starting to sue competitors over their "speaking from one hand held device into another remote one" innovation.

Bob Vistakin
FAIL

Re: Pathetic..

AA@ 15:33 Well said sir - those who came up with the concept first should jolly well be able to stop anyone copying it forever more: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_O_dOMG3oo

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

So much evidence Apple has lost the plot

Look beyond these desperate acts to see form another angle what the actual market thinks, and from the jobs point of view it's certainly thinking different:

http://www.indeed.com/jobtrends?q=Android%2Cios&relative=1&relative=1

Are you an IT pro? It's no longer safe to bet your career on Microsoft

Bob Vistakin
Linux

And the public *still* hasn't really seen Win 8

The shitstorm when it does will be in a whole different league to Vista.

Google expects Apple to block its not crap iOS maps app

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Siri, I'm a big James Bond fan

Show me a route suited to the car he drove in The Spy Who Loved Me:

http://theamazingios6maps.tumblr.com/post/33227350355/turn-left-into-the-water

Accidental discounts land Apple in NZ's Disputes Tribunal

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

You're disputing it wrong

That is all.

Windows Phone 8: Exceptional tools, but where are the devs?

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

You *must* have Win 8 for development?

That's amazingly stupid, even for them. Now, not only will more Symbian handsets than Microsofts continue to be sold as we just saw in the last quarter, but more fucking Symbian apps will be released for them too.

Android: Google's baby ate 75% of smartphones in just 4 years

Bob Vistakin
Linux

Re: Beware flying chairs in Redmond

I find the Android unit of currency useful when discussing Microsofts handset sales per quarter.

3.5 million = By Wednesday lunchtime.

http://techcrunch.com/2012/09/05/eric-schmidt-there-are-now-1-3-million-android-device-activations-per-day/

Ballmer: Windows Phone 8 'WILL ramp quickly', god dammit

Bob Vistakin
Happy

Yup, the Nexus 4 looks awesome

I'm going to get one of those - Awesome price too!

Windows Phone 8: Everything you need to know at a glance

Bob Vistakin
Happy

Re: Out of the box...

(Taking the unprecedented step of replying to myself)

Speaking of market share, here we see Android 75%, and iOS on 14.9%, so microsoft are welcome to whatever dregs blackberry etc leave them from the remaining 10%:

http://www.mobile-ent.biz/news/read/android-takes-75-per-cent-smartphone-market-share-in-q3/019760

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

Re: Out of the box...

Correct.

Market share for both is indistinguishable from floor noise, so if you can't measure it you can't say what the competition level is.

Microsoft building its own Phone hardware: Not 'If', but 'When'

Bob Vistakin
Pirate

Re: you could drive the Torrey Canyon through the wriggle room

It's captain claimed to be on a burning platform, but it was a huge lie his true masters had told him to parrot.

Bob Vistakin
Linux

Re: Tetra 3 slower than Intel Core i5

Microsoft shits on its customers then its partners and this is news, how?

Apple must apologise for its surly apology on its website on Saturday

Bob Vistakin
Happy

Re: Highly respected online forum????

I've always tried my best here to make it so.

Bob Vistakin
Happy

Just one more thing

Want to buy an iPhone in mexico? Think different:

http://www.muktware.com/4738/lawsuit-happy-apple-may-not-be-able-sell-iphone-mexico#.UJPZyMUxrBt

Nobody knows what to call Microsoft's ex-Metro UI

Bob Vistakin
Linux

TuxLunch

For when the cloud (Google, Linux based) and mobile (Android, Linux based) converge for a snack, its time to check out who's left to laugh loudest.

Bob Vistakin
Linux

Microsoft SuicideNote

Since that's how history will record it.

'We invented Windows 8 Tiles in the 1990s', says firm suing Microsoft

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

"We couldn't get anyone to like them either"

Correct.

Asus: we ship a million Google's Nexus 7s monthly

Bob Vistakin
Mushroom

That Death Star thing..

The difference being, of course, is they are not alone. Samsung makes the new Nexus 10. After these figures are out, do you think the other manufacturers are going to let the market slip away and do nothing?

Nokia primes Lumias for Windows Phone 8 push

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

Re: Meh - 2010 specs - no thanks.

Perhaps that's why these phones are bright yellow as favoured by simpletons - to wake you up after yawning at their specs?

Bob Vistakin
Paris Hilton

"unlikely to be as impressive as the fake footage used in Nokia's advertisements"

Nor greeted as enthusiastically as the fake fanbois rumbled in the queue for surface:

http://www.theatlanticwire.com/technology/2012/10/microsoft-fakes-excitement-its-surface-tablet-launch/58417/

Paris, for even she could spot the obvious pattern here:

Asus gets paid handsomely for swallowing Google's Jellybean

Bob Vistakin
FAIL

Re: In the other corner is poor old HTC

Who'd have thought it? If only there were some kind of record of how things worked out for anyone who "teamed up" with Microsoft. Oh, wait...

http://www.asymco.com/2011/02/11/in-memoriam-microsofts-previous-strategic-mobile-partners/

Forstall ousted from Apple after refusing to apologise for Maps

Bob Vistakin
Pint

Re: Guess the fairness of it depends on the situation

"Siri - what's the fastest way out of this place?"

Forgetting Microsoft: How Steve Ballmer's Surface could win

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Re: Gartner's predictions are meaningless

Speaking of stunning insights regarding the iPhone from a visionary tech guru:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eywi0h_Y5_U&noredirect=1

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

Re: Confused

It might be informative, or it might not be. The only thing not in doubt is how fucked microsoft are.

Google goes ahead, unveils Nexus 4 and 10

Bob Vistakin
Linux

Leapfrogged again

Higher quality at a lower price than all their competition - gosh this sounds like an advert rather than a statement of fact.

Granny upstages Microsoft, storms stage at Surface launch

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Re: It gets worse

@AC 14:01 Yes, that shows handsomely microsoft are up to their old tricks again.

They think their new turd has been polished with marketing money just enough so no-one can tell what a stinker it is. As this story shows, it will catch out a few gullibles before word gets out, but at least they back tracked their original evil stance and offer refunds.

With all this "new Windows devices don't run Windows software" confusion, and fewer apps than Babbages mark 1 analytical engine, it looks destined to never trouble the needle of market share in the same way WP8 doesn't.

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Re: It gets worse

The gift that just keeps on giving. And no-one outside the microsoft shill bubble has seen it yet - wait till the real reviews from real users start.

Judge GIVES APPLE THE FINGER in multitouch iDevice patent case

Bob Vistakin
Happy

Hey, Apple

Think fucking different.

Apple unveils iPad mini, upgrades its big brother

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Re: Nonexistent Nexus?

Does it come with a file?

This guy said a 7" tablet doesn't work - guess he meant Apple would release one over, err, his dead body.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFAjfUT8wZI

US patent office prepares to kill off Apple's bounce-back patent

Bob Vistakin
WTF?

Florian Mueller is to law what Jimmy Saville is to child welfare

WTF do idle journalists keep regurgitating what he spoonfeeds them?

Google adds 25 million grey building 'footprints' to Maps

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

It has to be said...

Presumably this would have automatically been rolled out to iOS, whereas instead their users get to marvel at wibbly wobbly bridges showing routes which were removed in 1957:

http://theamazingios6maps.tumblr.com/post/33227347622/the-lions-gate-bridge-in-vancouver-looks-a-bit

Google 'uniquely positioned' for move to mobile internet

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

Re: when life gives you lemons, make Lemon Meringue Pie

It's hard to imagine where Google would be now if, when Apple launched the iPhone, Jobs hadn't been so greedy and been forced to deal with the only carrier which would accept his terms - AT&T, the worst of the lot. Just a little more openness at the time and no matter what Google and Android did they could never have caught up. Even one more carrier would have been enough. Apple survived Antennagate etc virtually unscathed - it had the market to lose. Instead, it *forced* its competitors to develop an alternative, which is why we are where we are today, with their sheep fleecing antics still giving them the most revenue (whilst that lasts), yet seeing Android outsell them 4:1 last quarter.

Apple loses UK 'Samsung copied us' appeal: Must publicly GROVEL

Bob Vistakin
Happy

Re: Oh my sides!

Apple: Sorry.

Samsung: You're apologising wrong. Do it again.

Apple: Pretty please, sorry.

Samsung: On one leg.

Apple (standing on one leg): Pretty please, sorry.

Samsung: Your'e only saying that because you have to. Say it like you mean it.

Apple: Oh, we really mean it now. We won't do it again - honest. Pretty pretty please.

Samsung: Now give me your dinner money.

Protestors target Google over that video

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Re: That attitude, protestors said, mean we have entered an "age of mockery".

Behead those who say Islam is violent.

There's one part of Sharia law those who want it to the UK keep very,very quiet about. I can't think why - it's not like it's not going to be welcomed with open arms by the indigenous population, and reported fairly and rationally by our noble elite journalists. I am referring, of course, to the public floggings for drunkenness.

Apple to drop chip-baking partnership with Samsung?

Bob Vistakin
Mushroom

Re: Here a Troll, there a Troll, everywhere a Troll Troll@ Bob Vistakin

Eeek! That "dorothy" observation really hit a nerve!

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

Re: Here a Troll, there a Troll, everywhere a Troll Troll

Whereas all Apple fans are the true friends of dorothy - the obvious "elephant in the room" reason prettiness matters above such trivia as dodgy antennas, comedy maps and - what's this latest one? - oh yes, purple photos.

Bob Vistakin
Facepalm

Hope so

What could possible go wrong? The recent ongoing comedy of them ditching an essential component in their toys because they could do better wasn't anything to worry about, no siree.

And as their customers all chant each day: "Nanny knows best."

"Siri - modern cities such as London are often described as a concrete jungle for good reason. Do you know a secret place there where I can escape to and enjoy nature's greenery at its best?"

http://theamazingios6maps.tumblr.com/post/33227357714/some-parts-of-clapham-london-appear-to-be

Windows 8 pricing details announced as preorders begin

Bob Vistakin
Holmes

Correct.