Posts by Captain DaFt

Pabst Blue Ribbon?

Well, I'm definitly not a hipster then. I didn't even know they still made that swill!

Actually, I'll pass

Only cultured muscle cells? Even they admit it it only tastes "acceptable".

Real meat contains fat, muscle, connective tissue, nerve, blood vessel, blood cells of various types, plus other things that make up a living organism.

Just muscle cells alone won't have much flavor or nutrition.

Sitting at the desk in the office, IM, e-mail, voip, and visual chat on the computer, a cellphone for when you're away from the desk. Office phones have become a bit redundant these days.

*But*, a big, important looking phone covered with bells and whistles is still a status symbol among office types, even if it's rarely used.

So I guess you could say... Niagra Falls!

Please... PLEASE!!

Throw away your perfectly good TVs and monitors and buy a new one every year! We're desperate here! We've tried 3D, higher DPI, added tons of bells and whistles, bent the screens, now we're throwing in a touchscreen and computer for twice the price!

C'mon people! We're running out of gimmicks here!

... Our CEOs need bonuses! Won't you think of the CEOs?

[The preceding message was brought to by the World Television Corporation's Bonuses For Our Corporate Leaders Foundation]

(Ahem enough jocularity), How about we call a spade a spade, and just call them Gimmick Screens?

Sigh...

Headline: Apple, Samsung and BlackBerry go to WAR... in the Pentagon

And no one's posted this yet: "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here, this is the War Room,!"

It's about time!

sarcasm/It's about time the government took action and did something about these gangs of immoral toddlers roaming the streets with their porn-pads, ganging up around wifi hotspots, viewing porn and having orgies in the streets, outrageing decent moral adults! Have they no shame? Have they no parents?

I say round the ankle biting perverts up and put them in workhouses where they belong, and get British industry back on its feet!

GAWD SAVE THE QUEEN! /sarcasm

Big reason it won't happen

No military will advocate autonomous killing machines (other than extreme circumstances), for one simple reason. It'd take all the fun out of war!

"Other" may be "swill"

But I noticed their combined sales are greater than any one major brand.

The company with tomorrow's "must have" device probably lurks in that "swill". There are some lean, agile companies, ready to try something new in there.

It happens to the best of us

"Uh, I have some screws left over, is that a problem?"

The formula is simple

All you have to do to sell a PC Is:

Make it well, nobody wants a noisy, flimsy piece of crap.

Make it attractive. Nobody wants it if it looks like crap, and that includes gaudy, blinged out cases as well as dull, "we're all clones" boxes.

Make it accessible. If I can't find it, I can't buy it, now, can I?

This goes for both online and traditional outlets. If I have to wander a maze of webpages on your site just find it, fuck it, I'll go elsewhere, but if your closest retail outlit is only in select major metropolis' it won't be there.

Make it affordable. No, I don't mean cheap, I mean make it at least appear to be value for the money spent. I'll pay a reasonable premium for a quality machine.

Now see? That's not so hard!

Steve Jobs figured it out... Hell! Even I can figure it out, why can't you? What? Bottom line? Haven't you noticed yet that if you're only aiming for the bottom, you'll get there?

OK, I'm done ranting now... for now.

And?

What if he doesn't want to come back?

"Sorry, I was fired, I don't work here anymore! Now about my severance and termination bonuses?"

"But you want me to stay, you say? Well... You can rehire me on a new contract, unless I get a better offer elsewhere."

It's getting there

Man-made skin, blood vessels, bones, and now kidneys and brain cells*!

Soon some wacko in a run down castle in Eastern Europe will be heard shouting "IT'S ALIVE, IT'S ALIVE! ALIVE!

*Read the article on BBC yesterday, The Reg should have an article by next week.

My my...

Dell certainly has a track record for picking winners, doesn't it?

(Yes Virginia, that was sarcasm.)

Netbook dead?

Nobody around here got the memo. The stores couldn't keep'em in stock over the christmas season.

Of course, these are running unsanctioned Android ICS, so fly under the radar.

Hell, I bought one, and guess what? Using it for this post.

A word to MS, ICS does just fine with a wireless mouse and keyboard, no touch screen needed, and it interfaces with my TV via HGMI perfectly!

Hardly surprising

Of course a large number of bots are business machines, they're the last refuge of IE6, and many still depend on software using Active X.

The old "embrace, extend, extinguish" philosophy and lax security standards of the day at MS had the unfortunate repercussion of embracing malware writers and extending them a helpful hand. Too bad they are hard to extinguish easily.

And exactly what is supposed to power the ring?

A teeny-tiny battery with a life span of days?

Rechargeable, so it needs to spend time on an induction pad every few hours? (It'll get lost in no time!)

An Underdog super energy pill?