Posts by Captain DaFt

Re: Naming

"Starshine Bottlerocket"

Whoa, Isn't that a character on 'My Little Pony'?

One more for the list

"The Life of Loonie Lay, Canada's cheapest hooker"

Re: Operational Redundancy Opportunity

"the electronics boys are eyeing more toys..."

More? With all the software and hardware it's already sporting, adding more may just turn the LOHAN launch into the advent of the singularity!

Re: In case you missed the adverts

"teenage old interns"

Does being an intern at the BBC really age you that fast?

Re: Block 1 of new off-shore tax haven

"moor offshore and the US can just consider the installation an international location and impose taxes, tariffs, customs dues, etc. on anything heading to or coming from there."

Wot, and risk retaliation from the Skynet military forces of the Principality of Schmidtland?

Re: You can't beat script kiddies for an unintentional laugh

'Hack' is such an overused word in the Press anyway.

You might say that "Hacks* hack** vandals as 'hackers'***, hacking**** at true hacker's***** reputation, because they can't hack****** proper journalism."

Now if you'll excuse me, I seem to be suddenly suffering a dry cough.

*Hack - A Hack is a colloquial and usually pejorative term used to refer to a writer who is paid to write low-quality, rushed articles or books "to order", often with a short deadline.

**Hack - Sudden noisy expulsion of air from lungs.

***Hacker - Common hack* press term used to describe someone who seeks and exploits weaknesses in a computer system or computer network.

****Hack - To cut, notch, slice, chop, or sever.

*****Hacker - One who combines excellence, playfulness, cleverness and exploration in performed activities.

******Hack - Slang sense of "cope with" (such as in can't hack it)

Re: Pre-filter

" that 11% might also be the people who know a silly survey when they see one, and were really just going for the most entertaining answer each time."

Around here, That description describes the demographic called 'literate'.

(Probably explains why there hasn't been a survey conducted around here since the nineties.)

Re: The problem with Bitcoin @justin - it has no sponsor

"But it is worse bitcoin does not have any strong sponsor backing up it's value."

So you're suggesting something like "iBucks", "Amazon Gold", "Google Cash", "Windows Dollars 8.1 Home and Office", or "Oracle Coins", then?

Ew, I just had a chill... going to go hide under the covers for awhile.

Re: Government by the people?

"I guess the US can now stop pretending it's a democracy .."

Nope all that's come to pass has been voted on and passed by elected representatives, it truly is democracy (at its worst) in action.

Now the USA as a true republic*... That has loong since passed.

*A republic is a form of government in which power is held by the people and representatives they elect, and affairs of state are a "public matter" (from Latin: res publica), rather than privately accommodated.

Re: Sounds about right

"I'll publically admit to knowing very little about MS Windows, so my response when asked about slow-running Windows computers is usually something along the lines of "I can wipe the disk and install Linux if you like."

You're supposed to use the "mindless fanboi" icon when posting that. Unless you were being sarcastic - there's an icon for that, too."

Chill, it's a survival trick, one that I've learned to use myself after nearly chewing my own eyes out* while helping someone fix their mess.

Now I just say "Sorry, I don't run Windows myself, can't help you."

*You really, REALLY, don't want to know the details!

Re: Typically ignorant management response

"nobody gets promoted for preventing 'screwing-up'. Nobody gets promoted for taking preventative actions"

Twas ever thus; Take the time to do it right, you get yelled at by management for being slow, then either laid off or forgotten.

Slap something together in no time that falls over every six weeks, then to management, you're the hero that save the day every six weeks.

Re: One Thing Leads to Another

Maybe Japan'll be nice and lend them Godzilla.

He's kicked smog's butt before!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ox20l8LtE88

Re: Terrorism

"of course UK judges don't have gavels."

Really? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nVt1EY896cY

Re: Some tricks up his sleeve?!

"I'd show up in a polkadot shirt."

Nah, Get one of those narrow striped shirts that 'strobe' in a camera.

That'd probably throw the 'bot into a tizzy.

Re: 18kg? No match for a hooligan!

In fact, they'll probably end up being used as weapons by said hooligans.

"Oi need som'tin heavy ta throw... Er, here comes one now!"

Re: Freaked out ...

"This technology must have been out for ages. How else do you explain my inbox being full of baldness cures, weight loss pills and impotence remedies?"

Well it needs tweaking then. I need neither penis enlargement nor increased bust size, But there's a good chance if I did need one, I wouldn't need the other!

Re: Ball & chain

Prior art to ball steering mechanism: http://www.historyvortex.org/DalekAnatomy.html

And they tend to settle out of court, the hard way!

Re: My favorite version

Oops, can't edit for some reason. Just wanted to add: Konami code!

Re: "Patch Tuesdays" for cars?

"ONLY if the car maker used Windows For Automobiles."

Aw, HELL NO! No way I'm taking a tonne of steel down the highway controlled only by a touchscreen oriented OS!

Re: Collective noun for users of this API

BOO! Hiss! (Upvotes)

Bingo!

"Is this little more than aggressive begging?"

You've finally nailed a handle to his business model!

"Icahn, The annoying Billion Dollar Beggar."

"Before they make the jump they need to talk to the pros. Start with Bo and Luke Duke"

response: "Gun it, and hit the horn to play 'Dixie'!"

Re: Jobs for the boys

"Presumably he was the only contender who looks like Steve Jobs."

I *knew* I couldn't be the only one thinking that!

"This is a spoof of those linkbait sites"

Yeah, I got it... I still stand by my original post.

Lame idea is still lame.

Re: Linguistics

"That everyone knows perfectly well what "pretty unique" means"

Yeah, It's that bird in the bar that looks good, as long as she's not standing near any other women.

Re: QL

"Do marketeers and other noddys have any idea just how small a quantum leap (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atomic_electron_transition) is?"

Of course they do, that's why they use it.

A term that means the least possible change, yet sounds progressive and powerful.