Posts by Captain DaFt

Serious question

Not being anywhere close to a Latin Scholar and Google is surprisingly reticent.

How do you pronounce "tabernamque"?

'Taber-namk'?

'taber-nam-que'?

'fruit-john-jelly-roll'?

OK, that last one was silly, but the question is real.

Re: @John Smith 19

"My point was, if we think that security researchers are just one slap in the face -- "free! T-shirt! Yay!" -- from becoming criminals"

No, it doesn't mean they instantly turn criminal*.

It just means that the next time a major flaw in $Megacorp's system is stumbled across that could embarrass $Megacorp, lose it millions or even destroy the company, they'll just ignore it and go on with their life without the grief of dealing with $Megacorp.

*And I thought I was cynical!

Re: Easier said than done

"What's the incentive for developers to go through the extra work to target Modern and produce a full sized GUI and a touchscreen GUI, versus simply producing a Win32 application that they already know how to build?"

Not much. If past actions are any indication, most developers/software companies will develop for their target system. (Phone, computer, or tablet)

Then tweak it just enough to run half-assed on the other systems to get Microsoft's seal of approval.

Re: But sharks can't fly...

"So you do you get the sharks up in the air?"

You don't. This just enables them to communicate with Skynet.

"I vant your clothes and motorcycle. My finny friend here vants your liver."

"there is a real life"

"RUMORS"!

Where do you think the pizza delivery place is?

Real life is that awkward interface that turns online goods into tangible things.

It's housed in that big room called 'outside' with the annoyingly bright lighting that's out half time.

Re: Has nobody seen Pitch Black?

No, but I saw this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWYYkF6DOnk

Made in the 1950s, it was later rebooted in 2011 as Apollo 18.

So, feel free to explore the moon, just make sure Dad's on standby with a hook and ladder truck!

Re: Interesting

"As commenter points out, that is somewhat odd given the 'mobile first, cloud first' mantra."

Look at it as the typical antics of Dilbert's PHB.

Start with a mantra that is total nonsense, "Which goes first? Both! Seriously, in which direction should we focus the company's assets? BOTH!"

Then proceed directly to the Wall street idiots guide to corporate profits:

If it wasn't profitable for the company last quarter, read checklist, choose e.:

a. Cut back it's funding

b. Reduce it's workforce,

c. Outsource it

d. Sell it

e. Any combination of above, and give yourself a bonus!

Re: @Shane McCarrick

I'm thinking lack of air conditioning. Too hot inside for rumpy bumpy, so they just took it outside where it was cooler.

Re: Sad, but hardly surprising

"Microsoft tended to look at a new competitors product (often a smaller start up or a huge expensive rival) and fix the flaws, make it cheaper/easier to use and do well."

Actually, Microsoft has a long history of forming 'Strategic Partnerships', shafting their partners and kicking them to the curb.

These days, there's not many left that fall for that ruse, so Microsoft has to fall back on its own 'innovation', and we see how well that's working out for them.

"We’d like to apologise.."

"Somehow, I doubt it (unless followed by the words, "but we prefer not to")."

More likely followed with: "Because talk is cheap, and easier than actually fixing things."

Re: Not...

So you're saying, Earth *is* the B-ark?

"Is there a better way to keep a nonsense industry moving along than by opening up your secret data to the world..."

"Gentlemen, we are at an impasse, after billions spent on research, we are no closer to getting this bird in the air than we were five years ago. Therefore, we're posting the critical plans online so the Chinese can get them, then hopefully, our spies can find out how they fix it!"

Re: For extra bonus points...

"there are still iron mongers in Spain where you can buy just one screw."

Not to mention numerous bordello's as well.

Re: Retention rate

@ Bloakey1

OK, You've got everyone looking at me funny now.

Best laugh I've had all week, especially since it brought to mind:

"How do you feel about sex on the telly?"

"Oh, I'm against it! I mean, I keep falling off!"

"He needs to have his head bashed on the table a few times."

All that'd accomplish is a dented table.

Re: wtf?

"No habla ingles, Mi nombre es Juan. Tal vez usted tiene un número equivocado?"

or,

"Beedle beep! To insure your telephone experience, all calls to this number are monitored. Thank you for your co-operation."

or,

"HAHAHAHAHA! <snerk> AHHHH-HAHAHA HA HA HAAAaaa... No."

or,

"Dude, I already put those on Youtube."

Re: Some of those redditors...

"Because of Tetsuo Shima?"

No, Piccolo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7KWykbYNqs

Re: "Disney and Lucasfilm are, of course, saying nothing about the plot"

Um, I'm going out on a limb here and leaking the entire plot for the entire planned series of movies:

Cameos!

Fan Service!

Plot twists!

Unexpected romances!

Jedi battles!

Epic space battles with space ships acting like fighter planes!

Light Sabers!

All *NEW* and exciting special effects attributed to 'The Force'

Epic Land battles with light sabers, Weird aliens, droids, fantastical and extremely unlikely war machines, ray blasts, and...

EXPLOSIONS EXPLOSIONS EXPLOSIONS!!!

arblegarblegarble <foams at mouth and head explodes>*

*Yes, that was actually in the transcript.

As parodied here: http://freefall.purrsia.com/ff2500/fc02464.htm

"If I was exchanging semi secret stuff in the clear, I'd use brainfuck just to mess with them"

Actually trying to use brainfuck to do anything useful is the one sure way to get off any watch list, since you'll be a harmless looney.

It's called 'Brainfuck' for a reason, y'know.

Re: Go Japan Go

"You may hope, but where will the energy come from for electrolysis of water to hydrogen & oxygen?"

Obviously, once hydrogen production has increased consumption of oil and natural gas so much that they run out even more quickly than anticipated, we'll all be forced back to safe, non-nuclear coal!

Then wondering where all the smog is coming from since everything is using non-polluting hydrogen.

(of course, if they ever harness the power of sarcasm, people like me will power the future!)

Re: They're just sick and fed up of seeing terrorists use encryption to hide their plans!

I'm still waiting to hear who these terrorist groups are that jump onto the internet in hordes, swapping their nefarious plans willy-nilly across the internet.

So far, all the ones I've heard about on the news use runners that either deliver plans orally, written on paper, or loaded on USB sticks.

Of course they *could* be using Google+, no one ever looks there.

Re: Picture caption of the week

Now I want the tee shirt!

http://shirtshovel.com/sex-dickenscider.shtml

Re: Well then-

I don't know... It is rather thin, and those wings do rather resemble spread legs.

http://regmedia.co.uk/2013/09/22/lohan_team_vulture_2.jpg

Re: You mean you don't know?

Meh. Human caused/natural causes, real or scaremonger generated, I found a quote that puts the whole furor in perspective:

"What happens if we clean up the environment and it not the cause of global warming? All we'd have then is no smog, non-polluting power and clean water."- Art Challenor

Re: If gravity bends light...

The speed of dark is obviously faster than the speed of light as you can demonstrate with a simple experiment:

Open your closet door. You can see light enter the closet, but dark moves so fast that you can't see it leave.

As for the heat question, Radiant heat is just another form of light, but shiftier, as it doesn't let us see it. Who knows what it's up to.

Conductive heat is just agitated matter. Some photons, usually from the shifty Radiant heat mentioned above, seek to keep matter agitated. Most respectable photons just move a little faster when they see agitated matter, they don't want to get involved.

Convective heat is just conductive heat trying to escape the gravity of the situation, therefore the same rules apply to it.

Sexual heat is the odd situation where intellect has shifted from between one set of limbs to between the other pair. This may cause passing photons to stop and stare, usually yelling "Get a Room!"

So, as you can see there is no easy answer to that question... Er, what was it again?

Re: Perhaps Predictable

"How do you get a Tiger to pee in a bottle?"

Simples, the tiger is a cat, ergo, you make it clear that it can urinate anywhere *except* in the bottle.

Re: Timezones

Well, I've never tried one myself, but an old New-Englander did once share the recipe:

Clean and dress seagull as you would any poultry.

Preheat oven to 350F (175C)

Place seagull in a pan, add one brick, place in oven.

Bake 3-5 days.

Throw away seagull, eat the brick.

Here's a link for anyone interested:

https://diasporafoundation.org/

Re: Lovely. Not.

"More pretty but meaningless diagrams, based on arbitrary and unstated datasets extracted as meta-statistics from larger datasets from unknown and/or unchecked sources. If that's 'intelligence' then give me ignorance, please."

Hey! If it's good enough for the NSA...