* Posts by Captain DaFt

3821 publicly visible posts • joined 16 Jun 2007

Corporates ARE sniffing around Windows 10, says Computacenter

Captain DaFt

Re: Corporates will change there O/S only when they have too

"would you chance running the entire corporate fleet on an unsupported OS with a long and well founded reputation for insecurity?"

You yourself pointed out how Microsoft is leaving a shorter and shorter time the latest Windows is supported.

So therefore, most do, every time they move to the latest version of Windows.

Larry Page snuffs out ‘too expensive’ Google Fiber project

Captain DaFt

I'll get the shovel

Just another body for the Google Graveyard.

WhatsApp is to hand your phone number to Facebook

Captain DaFt

Re: To FB or not FB, that is the question.

"Thank the gods that I don't have an Facebook account!"

Yes you do, you just can't see it... unless you open an account.

Captain DaFt

Re: FUCK OFF

"but they have all your data not from you but by your friends and so who do use these services"

Too true. Facebook tracks you via your friends that use Facebook, and via trackers on the websites you visit.

They maintain so called "Shadow Profiles" on non face book members:

http://www.zdnet.com/article/firm-facebooks-shadow-profiles-are-frightening-dossiers-on-everyone/

And track or infer 98 data points from your web behaviour.

http://gizmodo.com/all-of-the-creepy-things-facebook-knows-about-you-1785510980

Facebook makes the old Stasi look like a bunch of slackers.

Radicalisation? UK.gov gets itself in cluster-muddle over 'terrorism'

Captain DaFt

Re: Alternatives

"I am not convinced that being scattered in pieces on a battlefield either from wearing a bomb or just being hit by one is an advert for a better life."

But it is an enticing escape for a lot of people suffering hopelessness, despair, and violence, especially since they're told it's a sure ticket to Paradise.

It's not just them either. World Wars 1 and 2 had chaplains on the battle fields exhorting the troops to lay down their lives for God and Country™, and God would welcome them to Heaven with open arms.

Pizza delivery by drone 'trialled' in New Zealand

Captain DaFt

Re: Stooopeed!

Alternative alternative plan, satellite delivered pizza!

(Please step outside before ordering)

Kindle Paperwhites turn Windows 10 PCs into paperweights: Plugging one in 'triggers a BSOD'

Captain DaFt

Re: Drivers everywhere

"Our IT folks are running short of keyboards, and the looks they are casting in my direction are not friendly ones..."

You might want to invest in some cling wrap to cover your keyboard before reading El Reg. It never pays to get the BOFH's attention. :)

Captain DaFt

Re: is there a comprehensive list of cockups?

"How exactly didn't they listen to their customers...every heard of the Windows insider program."

It's just a modern version of the old corporate suggestion box.

Only difference is this one dumps to /null instead of a waste bin.

Windows Update borks PowerShell – Microsoft won't fix it for a week

Captain DaFt

Re: Repair

"Someone above posted that it would be a good time to open a Windows repair shop. In brief ; I would rather gnaw my arm off rather than try to fix Windows 10."

Rather than repair, collect. Just emulate the plague scene from Monty Python and The Holy Grail:

Pull a cart through the suburbs labeled WINDOWS 10, ringing a bell, and chanting, "Bring out your dead.", Profit!

Captain DaFt

Ah, Microsoft

Is there anything about Windows they won't screw up?

NASA's free research trove may have broken arms trafficking rules

Captain DaFt

Re: NASA: past its sell-by date

"Read a space book today and it's pablum."

I dunno, this site: http://www.projectrho.com/public_html/rocket/index.php is a pretty good read, discusses a lot of rocket theory and practicality.

(Scroll straight down to the bottom to get to the actual links. They push their Patreon pretty hard.)

French, German ministers demand new encryption backdoor law

Captain DaFt

Re: Easy Solution.... For Da ter'rists

Defeat all back doors by couriers carrying hidden micro-SD cards, or just swap "family snaps" on Facebook with the occasional stenography, or with coded messages like "Look how well the wife's dahlias are doing this year"*.

Backdoors are useless at best, harmful at worst. They're a placebo for the paranoids in power.

[Look how well] -Louvre, France- [the wife's dahlias] -10:00 UST, April 12- [this year] -next year-

Watch the world's biggest 'flying bum' go arse over tit in a crash

Captain DaFt

Optional Headline:

"Flying Butt Lands Arse Down"?

Touchy iPhone 6, 6 Plus chips prone to breaking down and giving up

Captain DaFt

"BTW does anyone else have 69 minutes to edit their posts now?"

>Fnar< Maybe El Reg thinks you're too sexy for your posts?>fnar<

China's $30bn VC fund

Captain DaFt

But of course,

"Dozens of countries have tried – and largely failed – to recreate the extraordinary culture and innovation attitude of Silicon Valley. The post-mortems on most of those efforts have concluded that the over-involvement of government agencies and the existence of too many rules and regulations have been behind their lack of success."

Most countries that tried went the route of insuring taxes will be paid, rules and regs applied along treaty lines to ensure that toes aren't stepped on with other countries and corps.

China sets itself up as a major stockholder in ventures, so no taxes needed, just profits. And as for regs and treaties?

The major stockholder (China), and consideration for the largest market (China), dictates how those will be followed.

Watch out World, this could be a major game changer!

French submarine builder DCNS springs leak: India investigates

Captain DaFt

" DCNS outbid Germany’s ThyssenKrupp, as well as a Japanese government-supported bid by a Mitsubishi and Kawasaki joint venture, to win the Australian contract."

Hm, able to get the winning low bid by cutting certain corners, like IT security, perhaps?

No, we haven't found liquid water on Mars, says NASA

Captain DaFt

Re: Grasping at water straws

"To establish a colony on Mars we'd first have to send the shielded structures for people to survive in while they assemble the machinery needed to excavate the sub-surface habitats - that's a lot of very heavy stuff that has to be got from Earth to Mars."

Or we could land at existing caves, and set up temporary shelters inside them whilst we build the permanent ones.

Take Olympus Mons, for example. Huge, HUGE, volcano, riddled with caves and tunnels.

Find an underground dome about 1-2 km across, preferably near the top for ease of getting on/off the planet (Did I mention that it's HY-UUUGE?), and set up a habitat in there for long term, or use smaller caves for short term outposts for exploration.

Natural rock shielding from solar/cosmic radiation, plus insulation from cold.

Google broke its own cloud by doing two updates at once

Captain DaFt

Re: Still planning to have these clown in your infrastructure?

"If you want some of the world's best engineers fixing it then do."

News Flash!: Google doesn't have some secret farm where they breed "the world's best engineers", they use the same labour pool that you do.

However, if you're just hiring someone to shout at, Then just hire someone that passed his exams because his mother passed him notes. All you're looking is a body to yell at, apparently no skill needed and works cheap.

If you want "the world's best engineers", expect to pay a decent wage.

The bonus you get is that when things go tits-up, you'll have them there and working on your system first, instead of fixing some other company's system so that they can get around to yours... eventually.

Captain DaFt

Re: Change management 101

"However, if you go by a few measures:-"

I'd add one more:

8) Do you have a mitigation policy in place for the problem(s) you've warned management about, that they either chose to ignore, or simply waved away as "not in the budget"?

North Korea unveils its home-grown Netflix rival – Manbang

Captain DaFt

Re: @AC Typical monolinguistic anglophone

"Please give us a few examples for our education and amusement."

A couple of stateside companies, Wang Laboratories and Fannie Mae.

One from France, DiC Entertainment, pronounced 'dick'.

Always brought a smile when a cartoon ended with a little girls voice chanting "DICK!"

Blizzard blighted by another DDoS storm

Captain DaFt

Re: Probably not a DDoS

So what probably happened:

Blizzard IT worker:"Server down? No probs, I... Crap! my shoes use Velcro, and I'm all out of gum!"

Corbyn lied, Virgin Trains lied, Harambe died

Captain DaFt

I think you mean: 1.0224443355643st?

Microsoft buys Genee's lamp, tips it into Office 365, smashes lamp

Captain DaFt

"Microsoft has bought aspiring digital assistant start-up Genee and will roll it into Office 365."

OK, when did MS start hiring Hollywood moguls for ideas?

The last thing any computer needs is, "Clippy: Rebooted!"

Windows 10 Anniversary Update completely borks USB webcams. Yay.

Captain DaFt

Re: Satisfaction?

The most likely answer is that they have a profanity filter on their survey, and anyone telling MS exactly how they fell about Win10 can't get past it. :)

Captain DaFt

Re: MS is in decline, but Linux will never replace it

"Linux Mint and Linux Lite work straight out of the box."

Might I add, "While still in the box!"

Just set your computer to boot from usb, plug in stick with a live distro, and boot.

Doesn't even need installing these days to try out.

Captain DaFt

Re: The beginning of the end

"We are watching the beginning of the end of Microsoft."

Been watching that for way too long. Can't I just fast forward to the good part?

ISS astronauts begin spacewalk to install new docking adapter

Captain DaFt

Re: Don't drop that wrench

Wrench? They "dropped" a whole tool bag.

It floated away and later re-entered Earth's atmosphere.

On the plus side, it wasn't a classic Nokia. :)

Five-hour Azure wobble

Captain DaFt

Henceforth

I shall refer to Azure as "a raspberry jelly".

Because it's blue and wobbles every time they poke it.

Banking system SWIFT was anything but on security, ex-boss claims

Captain DaFt

SWIFT management responds:

-Why bother with computer defenses when billions are at stake, eh?-

SWIFT: "It's all somebody else's money, and we get paid up front, so No worries, eh?"

Microsoft promises free terrible coffee every month you use Edge

Captain DaFt

Whoa, hold on there!

"Microsoft's daily earnings restrictions which limit users to scoring 25 credits a day across 50 searches, 20 of which must be made on mobile."

So you have to use Edge, on mobile, to qualify?

And give up all privacy while doing so?

MS, Even you don't have enough money to pay me to do that!

Scared of mobile banking

Captain DaFt

OK, I'm curious

If three fourths of the people that refuse to bank online cited security as the reason, what reason did the other quarter give?

Couldn't remember their password?

Two G4S call centre staff sacked over 999 answering scam

Captain DaFt

Re: I chose the wrong career

"Turnip theft is no joke..."

And don't forget all those yokels falling off turnip wagons!

Windows 10 needs proper privacy portal, says EFF

Captain DaFt

Let's face it

The eternal game goes on, Once it was Bell Telephone ,today it's Microsoft.

To big to care, and powerful enough to ignore the Plebs.

You'll just have to wait until they inconvenience the Powers That Be™ before anything happens.

Captain DaFt

Re: "17.6946 metres, or about 118 pint glasses"

"126.39 standard linguini, for those of us prefer modern units of measurement"

Shows how far downhill El Reg has run... Pint glasses not a standard of measure here? Tsk.

If this headline was a security warning, 90% of you would ignore it

Captain DaFt

Re: I'm sorry ...

What?

Physicists believe they may have found fifth force of nature

Captain DaFt

Re: Matter/antimatter vs "regular"/"dark" matter

"The simple answer is "heat". The particles are speeding around and can't dump their kinetic energy (because they don't interact with anything)."

But if they don't interact with photons, how did they heat up in the first place?

Captain DaFt

Re: Matter/antimatter vs "regular"/"dark" matter

"so what keeps dark matter diffuse?"

Whatever it is, it helps create the Universe as we know it.

If dark matter wasn't kept diffuse, it'd clump inside regular matter, increasing the mass of stars of and planets until they collapsed into black holes.

(Most of the Universe's mass is allegedly dark matter, so the mass increase would be >ahem< astronomical.)

It's demonstrably not EM, strong or weak force, due to the lack of interaction with normal matter, so it must be another type of force(s).

Possibly the same force that's causing the Universe's expansion to accelerate?

Captain DaFt

Re: Matter/antimatter vs "regular"/"dark" matter

"Gravity, in fact, tells us where the dark matter has to be - in a relatively low density halo around galaxies - where it is diffuse enough not to have us wondering why some of the stars are apparently in small tight orbits around nothing."

And that's what makes my head hurt about dark matter.

Apparently it interacts with regular matter via gravity, but doesn't interact with itself that way, otherwise, it would form "dark planets", or somesuch.

Is there some force interacting in dark matter, but not regular matter, that overcomes gravitational attraction, keeping it diffuse, or does gravity only work dark-regular, or regular-regular, but not dark-dark, and if so... HOW?

Guaranteed Nobel for whoever figures that one out, I'll wager.

Verizon fingered in Android bloatware-for-cash cram scandal

Captain DaFt

And exactly how much value does it have to me...

If someone has to pay someone else to force it on me?

NSA blames it on the rain

Captain DaFt

"one of the data centers hosting the NSA.gov website fell victim to a storm"

Uh, guys? I think you're taking this "cloud computing" thing a bit too literally.

Ford announces plans for mass production of self-driving cars by 2021

Captain DaFt

Re: Exciting times

"this will cause a serious contraction in insurance revenues."

I already see the answer to that coming, and I don't like it.

Mandatory traveler's insurance.

Insurance companies will lobby for laws that anyone getting into any vehicle, car, bus, aircraft, ship, whatever, must have fully paid up traveler's insurance for that type of vehicle, or no travel for you!

Most likely a default "personal" policy allowing travel in land based vehicles.

A "business" policy that allows air travel.

A "Holiday" policy for air/ship travel.

Etc, etc, and so forth.

The Future is coming... for your wallet. :/

Chip giants pelt embedded AI platforms with wads of cash

Captain DaFt

intelligence isn't easy to replicate

Especially since defining intelligence is about as futile an exercise as arguing about "How high is up?".

Intelligence is a combination of many factors, sentience, self awareness, sapience, maths, curiosity, and on and on.

Some points are easy, like maths. Even a simple calculator is faster/more accurate than 99+% of the human population.

Self awareness, my computer can already do a much faster and accurate job of monitoring itself than I can.

Sentience is coming along at a frightening pace, sapience is probably decades away, and curiosity is, so far, completely lagging.

Other things like empathy, is anyone even working on that?

Captain DaFt

Re: Can we have an AI

"That learns I do not want tips, news, music choices etc. suggested to me .."

Ad AI:"AH, I think you'll want to view this fine line of Ad blockers then!" >Screen fills with ads for ad blockers<

(AIs don't appreciate irony... yet.)

Microsoft to overhaul Windows 10 UI – with a 3D Holographic Shell

Captain DaFt

Re: "Mixed reality"

Not homeopathy, this:

In the beginning was the plan.

And then came the assumptions.

And the assumptions were without form.

And the plan was without substance.

And darkness was upon the face of the workers.

And they spoke among themselves saying,

"It is a crock of shit and it stinketh."

And the workers went unto their supervisors and said,

"It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof."

And the supervisor went unto their managers and said,

"It is a container of excrement and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."

And the managers went unto their directors, saying,

"It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."

And the directors spoke among themselves, saying to one another,

"It contains that which aids plant growth and it is very strong."

And the directors went unto the vice presidents, saying unto them,

"It promotes growth and is very powerful."

And the vice presidents went unto the president, saying unto him,

"The new plan will promote the growth and vigor of the company, with powerful effects."

And the president looked upon the plan and saw that it was good.

And the plan became policy.

This is how shit happens.

http://ogun.stanford.edu/~bnayfeh/plan.html

Some Windows 10 Anniversary Update: SSD freeze

Captain DaFt

Re: Leaving Microsoft

"Oops, better post anon, because I disparaged 'free' software!"

Actually, the only thing you're disparaging is the corporate mindset:

"We've paid a fortune for this, and keep paying small fortunes to keep it running. It has to be superior! Our infrastructure is addicted to it!"

Native Skype for Windows Phone walked behind shed, shot heard

Captain DaFt

Damn!

And here I thought I was only kidding!

More gums than Jaws: Greenland super-sharks live past 400 years old

Captain DaFt

Re: Typical specimen is older than America

If anyone had bothered to read the links, They'd have seen that "I could care less" is sarcasm.

Amazing, Reg readers unfamiliar with that concept. Wotta World!

:)

Captain DaFt

Re: Typical specimen is older than America

-The proper expression is "I couldn't care less..."-

Nope; "I could care less." is the proper term.

I always take it to mean, "I could care less, but it's not worth the effort."

Business users force Microsoft to back off Windows 10 PC kill plan

Captain DaFt

'Fraid not

"Surely someone senior inside Microsoft will be principled enough to ask if all the ill-will its nagging efforts have generated are really worth it?"

More likely, someone in marketing is saying, "If only we'd pushed Harder, we'd have hit that billion mark!"

"If it don't fit, use a bigger hammer.", is the marketeer's credo.