* Posts by Robert Helpmann??

2583 publicly visible posts • joined 31 May 2011

London cops hunt chimpanzee in top hat

Robert Helpmann??
Joke

Re: Apes

They're apes.

If you are you referring to our esteemed Members of the Parliament...

You have apes? You are so lucky! We just have leeches.

Security market to exceed $170 billion by 2020, analysts say

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Extrapolating that X will be worth Y by year Z

True, there are some natural limits on how large the pool of qualified security professionals can grow within a given time, but there does seem to be good growth in this area. Besides government contract positions, there are opportunities opening up in the automotive industry. I would also expect more in the area of IoT (AKA The World of Doodads) and mobile computing, but time will tell whether there be more positions in those areas or if they continue to be ignored by most manufacturers and consumers.

Austrian mayor spunks €40k on virgin-eating dragon

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: I was quite impressed . .

...(introductory offer because I like your face).

Sounds like you are looking for a certain type of customer.

Google overlord Eric Schmidt to run Pentagon advisory board

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Does not mean what you think it means

Q: Who says Chocolate Factory and State Department are too close?

A: No-one who read this article as it was all about the Department of Defense.

Chrome 49 goes live as Google pays bug mercs $51k to patch 26 holes

Robert Helpmann??
FAIL

Exchange Rate?

I cannot access my email with this right now so I cannot send this as a correction, but this is the second article I have read recently on this site that completely screws up the exchange rates when listing the cost of one thing or another. There are five sets of figures listed which use four different sets of conversions, some of which are... implausible. Take these two sets for the sake of comparison:

US$36,500 £33,334 A$49,671

US$37,500 £34,260 A$26,469

The numbers, as they say, speak for themselves.

Uncle Sam's boffins stumble upon battery storage holy grail

Robert Helpmann??
Headmaster

Re: Regenerative towing?

I have seen Tesla's towed...

What's a "towed"? Is it related to what the French call a "crap-owed"?

Turkish hacker pleads guilty to $55m maniac global ATM heist

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Spellchecking budget cut again?

I'll add my 2 cents (exchange rates may vary) as I cannot access email at this time:

$10m (£7.1m, A$13.7m) in an epic 15,000-strong withdrawal spree across 18 countries.

In December 2012 the group pulled some U$5m (£7.1m, A$6.8m)...

Snapchat loses payroll information to phoul phisherpholk

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Short sighted/half hearted

Snapchat could and should have offered 10 or even 15 years of insurance cover.

Exactly. The goal of identity theft is no longer a chance to create a few credit cards and run off with a quick profit. As with many investments, the value of someone's identity is likely to increase with time. Two or three years of identity theft protection is paltry compared to lifetime of potential - even likely - damage a breach of this nature can inflict.

Brit brewer opensources entire recipe archive

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: new project!

It is definitely a worthwhile endeavor. While I sometimes take my enthusiasm for cooking to extremes, I feel there is little more satisfying than sharing a meal in which every item served, both food and drink, I put together myself. Good luck with your first batch!

Hackers aren't so interested in your credit card data these days. That's bad news

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Maybe I should get myself ...

...a couple of spare identities...

Been up playing a marathon game of Paranoia?

FBI says it helped mess up that iPhone – the one it wants Apple to crack

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Roger, Roger 8

I think number 3 is off the table as Apple have no reason to push back if it is the case that they have come up with bulletproof phones. There are a few other ways to go with this. For example, the courts might compel Apple to provide the data but not the method to do so followed by Apple engineering that particular method away.

To steer the conversation in a slightly different direction, if smart phones are based on Unix (or Windows) at some level, wouldn't that imply they have multi-user capabilities? If this is indeed the case, why couldn't an admin account be used to gain access, reset passwords, et cetera? I am more familiar with corporate environments than consumer, but I do not see why a preexisting admin account could not be set up to be used in cases of this nature where the owner of the machine wants to access data on its own property. I am not seeking to address the very real privacy concerns with this, but could someone more familiar with smart phones weigh in?

D&D geeks were right – their old rule books ARE worth something now

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Has to be a better way

Good point. Also, will the digital versions be simple image files or will they transcribe the text to create searchable documents? If so, then the only real need for high-quality scans would be for the illustrations as the use of digital text will work better than scans will. If not, they are less useful and therefor should have less uptake.

LISA Pathfinder drops its gravity-wave-finding golden boxes

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Major omission in the article

In all of the interviews I listened to concerning the confirmation of gravity waves, the boffins invariably pointed out that this was the beginning of an entire new method for exploring the universe. One visible light telescope wasn't considered "enough" nor were the first telescopes designed to detect radio waves or x-rays. Too, one major advantage of gravity wave detectors is they can "see" farther back in time than electromagnetic radiation will allow. This is a really good start, but it is just a start.

Terrified robots will take middle class jobs? Look in a mirror

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: 80-20 rule?

Helps if you are someone that can do the interesting bits I suppose...

This is what people really should be afraid of! Over time, technological advances have given more and more to people lower down the economic spectrum. While we still have food shortages, famine is a thing few citizens of industrialized nations have experience with. Spices that were once exotic import items are freely available and very cheap (how much does pepper cost?). Want to listen to music? You don't have to hire musicians to play for you as you can listen on the radio or through an internet connected device. Likewise TV and movies have brought the performing arts to the masses. Want a portrait? You most likely have a camera in your pocket as part of your phone. Want to have a sculpture made? 3D printing to the rescue! We are likely to have robot chauffeurs, butlers and maids available to us in the near future (or present in some cases).

The rub as I see it is that if we can all live like royalty, what will then give life meaning? What will provide the drive to do and then do more? What will motivate those who lack the creative genius to produce works that others will appreciate? Obviously, there will be conflicts around the technologies of the future just as there are for those of today but, setting that aside for a moment, I argue we should be figuring out what we will want when we all can have have it all.

Oz town suffers hairy panic attack

Robert Helpmann??
Flame

And afterwards you have...

a town to rebuild. Brilliant!

First, yes, it would be brilliant, especially if lit at night, but perhaps not in the manner you meant, Herr GrumpenKraut. Second, it sounds like a win all around. The local townsfolk gain both excitement from the spectacle and exercise from running around dealing with the conflagration. The firefighters would be better able to justify their positions and their yearly budgets, perhaps with an increase for next FY. The constabulary would likewise be able to get in on the act by filling out reports, gathering evidence, intruding into the lives of all around and failing entirely to catch the arsonist(s). News services would have something with which to fill their daily cycles. The public at large would have entertainment available they might have otherwise done without. Insurance companies and hardware stores would similarly be stimulated, passing the benefits of which to the economy as a whole. What's not to like?

China 'evacuates' 9,000 around monster radio 'scope

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: how many bottles of wine fit in a double decker bus

"if you fill it with wine, every one of the world's seven billion people could get a share of about five bottles".

Around 26,250,000,000 liters which comes to about 10,488 Olympic-sized swimming pools or 15,331,403,620* Bulgarian funbags (unless I misplaced a decimal or made a rounding error or was distracted by poodles).

* A whole lot of fun indeed!

Boffins' 5D laser-based storage tech could keep terabytes forever

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Seriously long-term storage

In 13.8 billion (13,800,000,000) years, it's a pretty certain bet that the entities reading data from such long term storage will not only not understand the file formats, but won't understand our language

Perhaps it would be better to opt for something more akin to HD-Rosetta as analog information may be encoded along side digital. Alas, it is estimated to last a paltry 10,000 years as a storage medium, but a similar approach in different media might be worth considering.

What would happen if Earth fell into a black hole?

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

What exactly do you criticize?

In the article? Given that it is presented in layman's terms (good deal, too, as I am not the best with physics), it should perhaps mention time dilation as a reason that no-one would notice a black hole popping up next to Earth. If we are going to indulge ourselves by using that as a scenario, we might better first discuss the black hole's motivation in doing so.

This article is posted under the Science section. It would have been better to place it directly in Forums or Bootnotes as it does not even pretend to be news... wait a minute... I just went outside to have a look and no black hole, at least none that I noticed.

Blighty cops nab Brit teen for 'hacking' CIA Brennan's AOL email

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Emphasis Added

Released documents were not highly classified and Brennan said he did not violate his security responsibilities by using the account.

It is not whether they are highly classified, but whether they are classified at all that is important. "Spillage" is a word no-one who has a clearance wants to have mentioned in conjunction with their name.

Ransomware scum infect Tinseltown hospital, demand $3.6m

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Air F**king Gap

...decent IT always comes second in a care environment.

Not even second. It takes a back seat to more than one effort (basic care, patient confidentiality, et cetera) even though it should be an integral part of the process. The biggest issue I would imagine hospital administrators see is that of liability (sad but true in my opinion). With any luck, this will be the wake-up call that encourages changes in many similar environments. If not this, then we will eventually see a story involving patient's implants and life support systems being hacked resulting in loss of life.

Backdoors are bad, Euro security wonks ENISA tell governments

Robert Helpmann??
FAIL

Re: With the evidence before your eyes, does your brain accept and mine the trail before you ‽ .

AMFM: "...steganography is the encryption that hides in plain sight text."

No, steganography is by definition not encryption, though they can be used for similar purposes. Encryption is the process whereby a meaningful set of data is rendered into a seemingly meaningless jumble, but which can be retrieved by reversing the process. Steganography is the process by which information is hidden within a larger set. I can understand your apparent confusion on the subject as I am not sure which process you applied to your post.

Post-pub nosh neckfiller: The gargantuan Gatsby

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Par frying chips

Frying potatoes twice with a complete cool down in between produces better texture in the finished product as the starches will set after the first heating but will not turn gluey when reheated. It also makes it quicker for restaurants to get food to table. I am not sure what might be going on with the milk there, but I will have to give it a try if only for the novelty.

Norks stabilise non-threatening space speck ... for about five minutes

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Dirty bomb

It's called "off site storage." I look forward to the day the Nork's glorious leader calls for one of his favorite movies to be recovered after it is accidentally deleted.

Microsoft researchers smash homomorphic encryption speed barrier

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Snooping

... encrypted "not databases" ... could be sent for analysis by third party clouds ... whilst still keeping both the data and the results of the analysis encrypted at all times.

But by doing this, wouldn't it open the door to data capture and eventual decryption? It seems to me that such an approach would be putting a large amount of trust in encryption alone instead of a more layered approach of encryption, access controls, et cetera. How ironic it would be if too much reliance was placed something intended to increase security and thereby allowed unauthorized access*.

*Not that anything of this nature has ever happened before.

LIGO boffins set to reveal grav-wave corker

Robert Helpmann??
Coat

Re: How many events ?

Perhaps they could set up a gravitational field generator nearby to calibrate?

...leaving now.

Verizon!–Yahoo! takeover! inches! ahead!

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: not looking good

I feel sorry for Yahoo! users.

So pretty much maintaining the status quo, then?

Security? We haven't heard of it, says hacker magnet VTech

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Great, blame the user... blame the children...!

Can people spank them on Amazon...[?]

Sure! Here's a listing of their products. I recommend using the review section from the Haribo Gummi Candy Gold-Bears product page as a guide for writing your own.

Forget Tiger Woods – here's Cyber Woods: Robot golfer hits hole-in-one during tournament

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Robotic golfers - Weaponised?

And should the human your cohort manage to overwhelm the 'bot by dint of numbers, the meatbags might find out why they are referred to as "clubs".

Norks uses ballistic missile to launch silent 'satellite'

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: National Insecurity

Ted Cruz punked the Sierra Club bad in a senate meeting.

While Ted Cruz is quite a good debater, I fear you confuse sophistry with actual punking. He threw something out as an implied standard that he himself does not follow (e.g. link).

Thirty Meter Telescope needs to revisit earthly fine print

Robert Helpmann??
Joke

No tangible benefits?

All the same, apart from the fact that the first three actually have tangible benefits, and bring happiness rather than the oppressive guilt and fear that religion bestows.

Bloodbeastterror, you make that the statement as if guilt and fear were not beneficial when in fact they are a pair of extremely useful tools for keeping the hoi polloi in line. I expect the next things you will be on about are the dole, threats of violence and control of the media.

Head transplant candidate sells souvenirs to fund operation

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Promising young man.

...Canavero has previously appealed to the world’s billionaires to step up and foot the cost of the operation.

I have to hand it to him, it takes a lot of guts to go through with something this radical; I certainly wouldn't have the stomach for it even if it would add to humanty's collective body of knowledge. He is obviously eyeing this as his opportunity to achieve his 15 minutes of fame. Still, it would seem unrealistic to expect others to simply hand him the money. When it is all said and done, I hope he doesn't let the experience and attention go to his head.

Official UN panel findings on embassy-squatter released. Assange: I'm 'vindicated'

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: @Hans Won't make a bit of difference.

It would seem that the SC has a different opinion: "Zee repurt ooff my deet ves un ixeggereshun. Bork Bork Bork!"

Cisco's purple princesses gush workplace joy

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: WTF?

FFS, this is news?

No, thus the article is filed under the Bootnotes section.

Are US companies really that controlling?

Some are. Disney is a good example of a company that likes to get into its employees' personal lives, even for non-public-facing jobs. On the other hand, I supported an agency at the Pentagon for several years while I had a fairly long pony tail (I'm a guy) and it was a non-issue. What constitutes "business appropriate" has certainly evolved over time.

UC Berkeley profs blast secret IT monitoring kit on campus

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Revised to make sense

The phrase should have been, "people should know that their admins can see literally every site they visit from university-owned infrastructure...." This should be made perfectly clear to all students, faculty and staff when the acceptable use documents were handed to them during orientation or on-boarding. We would like to think that schools have a much broader range of what constitutes acceptable use, but they still have an obligation to provide basic security across their networks in addition to the IT services needed by the organization.

To the point, though, I have yet to run into one that actually does a good job with any of this. My experience has been that machines intended to be used as kiosks are left logged in with admin privileges, AV and antimalware packages are absent, network defenses are... well, the setup described in the story is hardy amazing. In as much as we complain about government screw-ups in IT projects, school administrators seem to be less capable in this regard.

It killed Safe Harbor. Will Europe's highest court now kill off hyperlinks?

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Take down all road signs...

Where are we?

Amateurs! There is an entire roadway that could be covered in signage ( as shown in this picture of I85 in Atlanta). Also, there are no ads, no construction signs or equipment and no signs covered in shredded plastic in anticipation of replacing or being added to existing signs.

Smart toys spring dumb vulns. Again. This time: Cuddly bears, watches

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

So many flaws, so little time

Researchers with arguably too much time on their hands have discovered security blunders...

Nuts to that! There are so many security holes in so many products these days, it's hard to argue that they have too much time. The individuals involved could work for several lifetimes and still only scratch the surface. Because of the pervasive and invasive (even if self inflicted) set of network connected devices in consumers' lives these days, the chances of there being a flaw in at least one of them is simply more likely than at any other point before. It does not seem to matter which device is compromised as they all can open a person up to unwanted attention or actions.

Dutch cops train anti-drone eagle squadron

Robert Helpmann??
Joke

Re: 40 MM Bofors

Meh. Better to use Dragon's Breath rounds. If the drone was within range, it had it coming.

Uni of Manchester IT director resigns after chopping 68 people

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: his work there is done

Because they know very well how to sell themselves, to people who have the power but not the brain to make the right choice.

Foreshadowing the results of now-ongoing US elections?

Netflix picks up Molly at university, scores harsh character assessment

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: All I want to know is

I'm sure netflix more than anyone would love to see this done away with and to be given free hand to make all of their content availble univerally...

Sounds like a reason for Netflix to fund advertise on free-to-use anonymizing proxy services.

I love you. I will kill you! I want to make love to you: The evolution of AI in pop culture

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Does the machine choose the greater good - or avoid a direct action that would deliberately kill the man on the spur?

Indeed, Asimov added the "Zeroth Law" to the previous three in order to explore similar issues. To bring the great writer's work into focus on the developing issue of self driving cars and perhaps who is liable if one should cause harm to a person, I recommend a jaunt through Asimov's "Sally".

BOFH: In-depth IT training needs a single-malt distillery

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

You bastard!

...the PFY is coming along nicely

Yes, it wasn't "game in one". Still, he should realize that even if he wins the right to go on the junket, it will not end as well as he might have hoped or imagined. That much is predictable.

Home Office lost its workers' completed security vetting forms

Robert Helpmann??
Coat

Re: OPM

Yes, but the OPM has modernized to the point where all the theft was electronic and thus more efficient. Looks to me as though the Home Office still has some catching up to do.

Mine is the one with the personal documents missing from its pocket.

Baikonur hosts satellite laser comms node launch

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Popcorn time

Have an upvote for the Real Genius reference. Happy Friday!

Reg readers speak out on Thin Client technology

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Still alive?

Government usage, at least in the US, is on the upswing. In fact, I have helped implement a VDI solution in one agency and am currently using one in another. The points about user and software requirements are pretty obvious, so it should be no surprise that there is little thought toward making this a universal solution. However, in terms of savings, it has always been the support staff that costs the most and scale the least. For a large, physically dispersed organization of mostly desktop users, it is well worth spending the money to migrate to a VDI solution. Any equipment costs should be offset by the improved productivity of the support staff.

On the other hand, providing under-powered equipment or infrastructure ends up costing more than the cost of upgrading to fit actual needs as the people using it will waste plenty of time waiting for their systems to work... but that holds true for every piece of equipment I have ever dealt with.

Pay up, Lincolnshire, or your data gets it. Systems still down after ransomware hits

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

If it was that good to get past, escalate privileges and go on a rampage without being noticed straight away then why phish a council?

The handy thing about ransomware, at least for the black hats, is that it doesn't necessarily need to escalate privileges in order to do damage, at least on a Windows system. It only needs to get at your data to cause you problems so it only needs your access rights. This may not be the case in this instance as it obviously spread beyond the original... person who opened the infected email, but for a single user it should be enough to just lock up the files that matter to them personally. This skirts system and program files as the goal is for them to eventually use their computers to send the ransom.

As far as the skill level needed to get past the council's cyber defenses, why would you expect it to be all that difficult to compromise their machines or network?

Ban internet anonymity – says US Homeland Security official

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: The right to anonimity

He played the "Think of the Children" card right off, didn't he? The problem is that people saying this never are concerned with the actual children and want us proles to focus on the horrible predators out in the wilds of the internet. When we stop to consider what we would actually want for our children (and ourselves), the answer is usually the opposite of what is being requested.

Google patents robotic 'mobile delivery receptacle'

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: Would a...

Needs to be a robotic dog. Rather than building a better mousetrap, it looks like Google have re-invented the mail box.

'Here are 400,000 smut sites. Block them' says Pakistani telco regulator

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: "... 429,343 banned-smut Websites."

It's a veritable hotbed of bare ankles, women standing within 10 metres of men and of consensual sex....All apparently controversial things in Middle Age civilisation...

Well, once you hit middle age, you might be doing quite well to get within 10 metres of obtaining consent...

BOFH: I want no memory of this pointless conversation. Alcohol please

Robert Helpmann??
Pint

Good Idea

There is snow coming and we are being sent on our merry way earlier than normal. I think I will implement at least the happy ending part of this story right now.

Virginia man charged in intriguing 'suspicious bacon' case

Robert Helpmann??
Childcatcher

Re: I grew up having to eat nasty Brit bacon occasionally...

...My bacon mission around the world....

You missed:

Jowl bacon (American) - Streaky, wider than other varieties. Quite nice for sandwiches.

And for the non-pig-eating people of the world:

Beef bacon - Streaky, from the same cut as most American bacon, but more meaty as it is beef.

Macon - Made from mutton. Just found out about this and now have to try it.

Gribenes - Turkey or chicken skins. Pushing the envelope a bit, but satisfyingly crunchy.

Vegetarian bacon - See comment concerning turkey bacon.

Dulse (Palmaria sp.) - Mercifully contained to labs somewhere on the campus of Oregon State University, this horror was covered by El Reg not just once, but twice.