* Posts by JeepBoy

23 publicly visible posts • joined 12 Jan 2011

Using the datacenter as a dining room destroyed the platters that matter

JeepBoy

Ah Memories

I worked on Ferranti Argus years ago too.

My abiding memory is of my team leader flicking switches from memory to enter the program that allowed the computer to boot from disk instead of paper tape.

I also witnessed my first head crash. Because of the size of the Winchesters, it was a memorable event. The room was filled with the sound of a buzzsaw and the same team lead leapt up like a startled rabbit and hit the big red button. Too late of course, and we mounted the disk platter, with the silver ring inscribed in the middle, on the wall... alongside the others. It wasn't a rare event I learned!

Being very junior, my task was to rewind all the paper tapes. One day, I looked down to discover that I'd carelessly rested my finger on the edge of the paper tape and several yards of tape were bright red instead of pale green. My boss wasn't greatly sympathetic when I went to tell him with blood dripping from my finger. He ignored the blood, and complained that I'd ruined that tape and it would have to be re-generated.

If you fire someone, don't let them hang around a month to finish code

JeepBoy

It's a wise manager who immediately calls security on any terminated employee to show them the door, and it's not just software.

A manager I knew at a car dealership, which closed, locked out all of it's mechanics for fear that one of them would take their revenge on a customer car, or nick some of the more expensive garage tools.

The mechanics arrived one Friday to discover all the doors locked, and they were allowed in one at a time (under escort) to retrieve their tool lockers and overalls. Everyone got their stuff, and all the money that was due to them, but nobody got the chance for "revenge".

The manager kind of regretted having to do all that. He knew most of the mechanics were good guys, but it would only take one to cause immense reputational and potentially legal damage.

RIM: 'Faulty switch took out faulty-switch-proof network'

JeepBoy

I expect the wrong kind of leaves were on the line.

BlackBerry users back online after outage

JeepBoy

Yup.

Now, I realise it's a joke, but a similar jokey reference about blowing an airport sky-high if his holiday flight was delayed led to an arrest under the terrorism act.

Just sayin'

Amazon revamps E Ink Kindle line

JeepBoy

When have electronics *ever* been sold at an exchange rate price?

The UK market has and will ever be a "Treasure Island" for importers.

I was pleasantly surprised that the usual £1=$1 idea hadn't been applied and we can get the touch for *only* £89 instead of £99!

Winter for webOS, winter for Droid, but springtime for iPad!

JeepBoy

Yup... me too!

Hu-hmmm, hu-hu-humm, h-hu-hum-ha, Winter, for Poland and France.

Damned subliminal advertising! :)

Galaxy Tab remains illegal in Germany

JeepBoy

Prior Art?

Star Trek being one of those prior art examples of course. :)

I recall many episodes with the crew using their "smooth and simple" tablets to display info, and communicate. I watched an episode only the other week... it looks like an iPad to me! :)

Is prior art restricted to the "real world", or can fictional precursors be cited as prior art sufficient to cause a patent app to fail? Lawyers... feel free to comment, I don't know the answer.

Expect Apple to be sued by Paramount Studios imminently! :)

Don't buy your iPad in a McDonald's car park

JeepBoy
Happy

It's older than that...

The expression "Never buy a pig in a poke" shows a variant of this scam was practiced in "Merry Olde England" (where's the Gothic font El Reg?) back in the Middle Ages.

The stupid dupe bought what he thought was a piglet at McD's Market Stall... hands over the groats... Then the switcheroo... and he gets a cat in a poke (small sack) to take home.

Some scams never get old! :)

Chinese lecturer demands his students acquire iPads

JeepBoy
FAIL

I wouldn't hire you either!

Whilst I agree the Chinese bloke is a nutter, I think you may soon be destined for receive a life-lesson in how society works.

I wouldn't hire any idiot - or give additional plus points - solely because he happened to be wearing a suit. My job as an interviewer is to reject idiots and identify stars by careful questioning.

However, I also wouldn't hire anyone who thought they were too good/clever/"modern" to conform to the dress-standards that prevail in my industry and/or showed complete disrespect to their interviewer by turning up in "something comfortable". Why any firm would wish to hire such an arrogant social misfit is beyond me!

You aren't going down the pub with your mates - dress appropriately to the situation!

Good luck in the interview BTW.

Apple pilfers rips off student's rejected iPhone app

JeepBoy
Stop

Move along, nothing to see here...

Story so far:

Apple behaves with questionable morality (yes,yes, it wasn't patented, trademarked, or copyrighted - who cares - morally it stinks).

World complains that Apple (bizzarely painted as some altruistic commune by many) behaves as a commercial enterprise trying to maximise their market share and make a buck out of an unprotected idea that they've seen.

Apple Fanbois complain that their champion could never do wrong, and there must be a misunderstanding.

Vitriol is swapped.

No minds are changed.

World continues spinning.

3D-printed bikini goes on sale

JeepBoy

Irony Huh?

"If this is what she wants, taking your girlfriend to the lingerie store is going to leave a whopping hole in your wallet"

As some other posters have mentioned, it looks as comfortable as an outfit made from lego and seems as supportive as a carrier bag - basically it fits where it touches. Custom made.... lol... I think they need to calibrate their measuring equipment.

It might appeal to geeky boyfriends (neat 3d-printing app huh?) but I can't see any girlfriend of sound mind wanting anything to do with this.

Russian computer programmer buries himself alive

JeepBoy

Mythbusters

... did a show on this.

They didn't do the maths, but did several practical experiments involving "coffin breakout".

It's doubtful anyone could break-through the lid (no leverage or room to hit hard)... and even if you broke through it was doubtful you'd shift the soil (weight) before being suffocated.

Conclusion: Busted.

JeepBoy

Stupid is as stupid does.

Forrest Gump said it best!

Bloke drives with knees while manipulating two mobes

JeepBoy

Curlers

Years ago I saw one of those small column 8 stories in my newspaper... Can't remember it verbatim now, but it was along the lines of:

"Police have been unable to trace the lady motorist, reported by several other drivers, who was using curling tongs while driving in the fast lane of the M4 yesterday morning."

Now that's scary!

Not in the same league, but I've certainly seen women applying make-up whilst driving along at some speed. I'm guessing they were also steering with their knees. They didn't see me as they'd adjusted the rear-view mirror to apply the mascara!

Rapture postponed as world inexplicably fails to end

JeepBoy

Nope...

... the preacher predicted that a rolling wave of earthquakes would occur in each timezone at 6pm, and that the righteous would be "raptured" to heaven to sit a God's right hand.

The rest of us sinners (plus the cats!) would have to hang around until mid-October when God would destroy the Earth and put us out of our misery.

What a Cat-astophe!

Oh Noes. Will no-one think of the cats... erm, children

CATS to be saved by BLASPHEMERS after the RAPTURE

JeepBoy

erm... yes He can

Santa Claus manages to be everywhere in the world on a single day... I'm sure an omnipotent being such as God can manage the same trick.

Fast-fingered oldster relieves shop worker of iPhone cash

JeepBoy
Happy

But at least it's reliable :)

Way back when mobiles cost several arms and legs... my Uncle bought a fake phone (as a joke, I think). I recall the box it came in being "in" on the joke by making a plus of the fact that it was just an empty shell.

"Highly Reliable..." , screamed one box sticker which went on (in smaller type) "as phone contains no working parts that can wear this product will *last*"

"Low Operating Cost" screamed another.... "non-working phone means no expensive phone calls".

Menorcan politician flashes substantial chesticles

JeepBoy
Coat

Snap

Not quite as "In Yer Face"...., ...., ...., erm, sorry... mind was wandering there... but it reminded me of a political advert from a busty German politician in Angela Merkel's party showing a picture of both of them in low-cut dresses flaunting their wares with the caption "WE HAVE MORE TO OFFER!"

Made me laugh anyway. :)

http://iaindale.blogspot.com/2009/08/campaign-boob-or-masterstroke.html

Lads from Lagos pop up in Libya

JeepBoy
Happy

Bad Grammar FTW!

I'm sure I read somewhere that the atrocious spelling and grammar of the Lagos lads’ posts was actually a neat psychological trick.

The idea being that the email would suck in the terminally stupid – no surprises there! – but would also tempt a few cleverer folk. These clever folk would realise it was a scam, but they’d reckon that as the scam was being perpetrated by a bunch of clearly illiterate morons, they’d be able to turn it around and so scam the scammers!

Some folk are too clever by half… the scammers realise that... and hope that these “clever folk” will try to prove it.

Amazon splatters ads to cut Kindle price

JeepBoy

I Don't Fear The Ads... BUT

I doubt very much that people fear the Ads... they fear the intentions of Amazon and suspect that this is merely the thin end of the wedge.

As the article says, Amazon's dystopian vision for the Kindle as some kind of portal to a hyper-linked book full of embedded "we thought you might also be interested in" and "J.Smegins thinks this is a great bit of prose" links isn't a vision that is shared by all of the Kindle owners that I know, or I suspect most Kindle owners that I don't know!

We just want to read the book thanks. Like many others, I prefer to do this reading on the Kindle for its convenience and sheer portability (100's of books and never gets any heavier).

Adverts and Links won't improve the user experience of the Kindle as an e-reader in any way. Once this facilty is added to the Kindle software, wait and see how soon it becomes compulsory to receive Ads everytime you download another book, and how soon those Ads will move off the idle screen and start to invade the book text.

IT grad claims £5m for crap degree

JeepBoy
FAIL

Oh Dear

Surely the worrying thing is that this evident moron was actually awarded a 2.2.

I think I'd be quite insulted and feel devalued if I'd also got a 2.2 from Bradford - they can clearly be obtained by any fool!

* FAIL - for graddie attempting to play the racism card. Stupidity is colour-blind!

The Last Airbender up for nine Razzies

JeepBoy

Why are they doing that, what are they doing, who is that, etc ?

Re: The Last Airbender.

I watched the animated series with my son (12). The 'toon is actually very good and tells an intelligent story populated with well-drawn (in all senses) characters. It has all the themes - love, betrayal, revenge, redemption - and was an outstanding series. Certainly good enough to hold this adult's attention.

At my son's prompting, I later saw the film. Oh dear!

It deserves to win all of those Razzies. Unintelligible plot, poor acting, poor effects. I had difficulty working out what was going on even with the advantage of having seen the animated series. No standalone viewer would have had a clue!

Ombudsman slams DWP, HMRC data dumbnesses

JeepBoy
Paris Hilton

Audit Trail ?

As I'm sure El Reg realises, the "additional steps" would involve building in audit trail functionality to track the data changes going into the system - and who made them.

If it wasn't thought about when the system was built/designed, it ain't gonna happen anytime soon!

Paris... coz she'd have made a better job of designing the system!