Posts by Lilolefrostback

Even today

Two years ago, we installed a new program that requires a default printer be selected or it won't run. Program does not have a print function.

Re: Ah, a first time user

You can also get conversion kits to turn real manual typewriters into computer keyboards. I'm tempted to do so and bring it to work. I'm sure the sound would really encourage my co-workers.

I do, on the whole, like the idea of shorter, simpler functions. However, out of curiosity, I recently wrote a program twice - once to just get it to work and once using the "shorter, simpler" paradigm. The former took maybe two hours (tested, documented, deployed). The latter took two days (tested, documented, deployed) and was more than twice as long.

Sometimes it's better to be simple about things.

NB: for a much larger program, shorter simpler functions would probably be desirable.

Re: IT managers were always the most difficult

Recently asked a user to send me a screen shot of the error message on her screen. She pulled out her phone, photographed the screen and emailed me the picture. But our management insists that all of our users are perfectly competent computer users. And pigs fly.

Re: Yes the users are bad

To be fair, sometimes we do the same. Last week, I received an email from a colleague (same IT dept, same job title and description) saying that when he'd run a program, it had given him an error. No details profferred, just that there was an error.

I had to actually email him for details on the error. Got the details, but no apology.

If we cannot do things sensibly, why should we expect our users to do so?

Re: "Cars of the day... " Harumph. I owned an original shape Ford Ka from new.

I thought the Ford Ka was made in Boston. 8^)

Re: Proper lash up

If your government works like ours, it will be renamed the Permanent Overpass the day AFTER plans are announced to remove it.

Re: heefee, heefy, weefy, wiffy....

I had a Japanese co-worked ask me whether I like kanigee. Took quite a while to figure out he was a jazz fan talking about Kenny G.

Re: In pre-computer days people were used to memorize sequences....

I've been calling these things "magical incantations" for several decades (crap). I hate them. They inevitably break and the users have no understanding of how things actually work. I've seen some cases where the users don't even understand what the dratted things actually accomplish. "I do this every Friday afternoon because it's part of my job. I don't know what it accomplishes."

Sorry. Actually encountered this today at work. TGIF.

Re: Key workers

Oddly, we software types have been asking for years for the ability to work from home (at least occasionally) only to have the infrastructure types say that it cannot be done securely so "NO".

Last week, management decided that we were essential workers and that all essential workers that could do so would work from home. Lo and behold! We were told by infrastructure that yes we can work from home and that we've had that capability for years. That did not improve their reputation.

Re: Hair today, gone tomorrow

The barbers at the shop I attend all use their smartphones, including as POS terminals. Since they all had smartphones anyway, the whole setup was effectively free. I'm quite impressed.

Re: They were left with a rather large bill

I see what you did there. Well, toucan play at that.

Re: Twas ever thus

So that's what quantum entanglement is all about. Excellent.

Re: He should be proud that of that guy

Do companies still even use internal phone systems of any type? I've been with my current employer for 6 years and there's been no internal phone system during my tenure. Cell phones and the odd land line (I know of only one actual wired phone). Just shy of 2000 employees. There has been talk about getting a few voip phones for the meeting rooms, but they've been talking for several years.

Re: Bah!

It's always amusing to see security for tech firms set up by non-technical types.

Years ago, I landed a job with a tech company in Texas (no names). Not knowing anyone in Texas, I figured I spend some evenings roaming around doing some photography. I didn't want to leave my (film) camera in a HOT car, so I asked the head of security (retired police chief) if I could bring it into the building. No. Could I leave it at the security desk? No. Ah well.

Now, the interesting bit is that I could bring in a briefcase or backpack and it would never be searched. Never. So I could sneak in a camera. Or I could just print documents out and lug them home. Or I could fax the documents (no PIN needed) anywhere in the world.

Yes a camera could be used to steal valuable IP. But it would be the least efficient method at my disposal. SMH.

Re: Let's face it, who amongst us hasn't lost a tie to the...

At my first real job, it wasn't just dangling jewelry, rings (even wedding rings) were verboten and for good reason. The computers contained batteries and capacitors that held sufficient power to amputate a finger if the ring touched the wrong spot.

Re: Error Messages

Yesterday (Friday) 30 minutes before the end of my work week, I received a support request from one of our departments. One of their computers had had a pop-up stating that the hard drive was reporting imminent failure. Since I support SOFTWARE not HARDWARE, I was a little peeved.

When I read the full details of the request, I really did not know what to make of things. The pop-up had appeared more than a week prior. They had rebooted the computer and had been using it ever since. They were filing the request "for information purposes".

I reassigned the request to the fellow who manages their hardware. I still really don't know how to respond to this, but I decided to leave my work phone at work this weekend (I'm under no obligation to carry it outside work hours).

Re: Leap Out And Let It Burn

HR being Human Remains?

Re: Simplified?

First book I ever threw in the trash was Webster's dictionary when I discovered they considered imply and infer to be synonyms. I'll stick with the two-volume copy of the Oxford dictionary I inherited from my father.

Re: First step, tell them to fire security

Yeah, personally learned the hard way that stopping break-ins can be more expensive than a simple break-in.

My car was broken into twice at my apartment parking lot, resulting in several hundred dollars damage to the door handles each time (about the same cost as my deductible, so mostly twas me out of pocket). After the second break-in, I simply left nothing of value in the car and left it unlocked.

If you're wondering, the car radio was the cheapest third-party radio I'd been able to find. No thief ever tried to steal it.

Re: Top-posting makes sense unless you're reading your emails weirdly

Don't know where you work. Where I work, the vast majority of top-posted email I receive is the end node in a chain of emails (i.e. I have NOT been involved in the email chain until long down the chain). And I do have to do the stupid reading process from scratch to really understand what I'm being asked.

What I really want is an email system that can dynamically reconfigure a received email from top-posted to bottom-posted and from bottom-posted to top-posted (I throw in the latter for the sick, twisted preverts who like top-posting).

Re: Help! My stiffies stuck in the slot

It wouldn't be too bad, having printers on lots of desks except that, inevitably, there'd be a boatload of different makes and models, all needing different drivers and requiring different configurations. A couple of our departments have just that. There is no need to have different makes and models of printers. But the purchasing guys have to buy what's cheapest when directed to buy, so the printers are always different.

Re: Well if the US ships want the Chinese to keep out of the way

"Handy how it's always a woman who's doing the stupid thing as well in the story."

A lot of these stories come from teh 80s and 90s. Back then, computers in offices (and homes) were new. Typically they first wound up on desks of secretaries, most of whom were women and had never seen the silly things before. It's entirely reasonable that silly stories like this from that era feature women. That said, my best stories from that era feature men.

Re: A modern twist

"I had to Google to work out how to shut a Windows 8 PC down.

I work in supercomputing..."

There is nothing super about Windows.

Re: "While you're here, could you just..."

And the tickets may show a pattern that might lead to a more effective resolution.

"Gee, printer XYZ needed to be repaired N times last year. Replacing it would actually save us money, now that it's past warranty."

Re: Driving staff away

I've encountered the reverse. My very first business trip ever was a short single day trip for a meeting in another city (specific details omitted to protect the guilty). Got up, ate breakfast, caught the red-eye (90 minute flight), took a taxi to the meeting, took a taxi back to the airport, had lunch (burger, fries, soda) at the airport, flew home, had supper at home.

My expense report requested reimbursement for two taxi rides, 8 hours parking at the airport, and lunch. And I got yelled at. For not claiming enough. I was told I should have claimed three meals for a total of at least $50 (this was mid 80s), not one meal for $6. I was making my coworkers look bad.

I claimed exactly what I had receipts for. When it comes to restaurants, I'm a paper napkin guy, not a cloth napkin guy.

About that time, I was working for a major telephony equipment manufacturer. Yeah, it sound like a lot of money, especially when multiplied by the number of installs. However, it's very likely that the features paid for themselves within a month of installation.

A co-worker and I spent 6 months, so one-geek-year, working on a feature for 800 service. We charged the telco $100K per switch for that feature. We were talking to the telco rep a few months later and he mentioned that, on most switches, the feature paid for itself in a week. Needless to say, we were not encouraged.

Before you stomp on the equipment manufacturers, consider how much the telcos make.

Re: Mice are not particularly intuitive

You cannot leave it there: what <emphasis/> are you driving?

Re: Error messages

Ah yes. "screen shot". I'm horrified by the number of "screen shots" I receive wherein the affected user has used his cell phone to photograph the error message on his computer monitor and then emailed me the photograph.

This is done because the users do not understand how to take an actual screen shot in Windows.

Re: Not me...

Not a clothing story, but along similar lines (not as happy an ending).

One of our engineers stayed late one night to solve a problem for a customer. Worked about 5 hours extra, but managed to get to work the following morning, only about 10 minutes late. Well, one of the gits from mahogany row was at the employee entrance with a stopwatch and gave him an earful for being late (didn't even ask why he was late, even though he knew that engineer was a very professional lad).

Engineer took the full brunt of it and then proceeded to find his manager to inform him that he, the engineer, would be working normal hours and nothing more thereafter. He left a few months later, and it was a definite loss to the company.

That was my first introduction to MBAs. I've see little to indicate that that incident was not representative of the typical MBA.

Re: Speaking of shitty equipment

Wow. I wish.

One group at work puts together large document stacks to be sent to a client (before anyone starts in on "why don't you do it electronically?", there are LEGAL reasons for paper. Every person in that group has their own printer. Just about every printer is a unique make/model. Nightmare. There is no reason for it at all - any of the printers in use would suit all of the users. The folks that buy printers simply look for the best deal. Except that having to support umpty different printers is not the best deal.

Not technical, but appropriate ...

Have you noticed that (bag) pipers often walk around whilst playing? Do you know why? They're trying to get away from the horrible noise.

Re: Diagnostic process

Thanks for using "chresmomancy". It was a new word to me, and I love encountering new words.

Re: It happened to colour TVs, too....

Just imagine what that did to their lungs.