* Posts by Sir Runcible Spoon

5770 publicly visible posts • joined 29 May 2007

Gov will pay £2.25m compo to ID card suppliers

Sir Runcible Spoon
Coat

Sir

That Blunkett fella, he must be blind as well as stupid.

Coming soon: Die Hard 5 - The Zimmer Frame

Sir Runcible Spoon
Coat

Sir

Hey Lester, I seem to note a touch of cynicism in your article, that can't be right can it?

Tax tribunal finds contractor wasn't employee

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"that may be true but I bet he has a bigger dick than you."

I wouldn't count on it, although I will admit to having bigger balls. Fuckwit :P

Sir Runcible Spoon
Megaphone

Sir

"Or perhaps you can't..perhaps you're not good enough."

I doubt that is his problem, after all, we've all met really shite contractors who somehow manage to hang on for 3 months.

No, I think his problem is a complete lack of BOLLOCKS. Simply because there *is* no security, which is why we are *contractors* and NOT *employees*.

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

Hang on a minute. I take your point about public sector chasing something down because 'it is written' (probably in the book of Cyril) but the *entire* point of IR35 was to claw back taxes that HMRC thought they were owed.

As a taxpayer myself (yes I do pay a lot of taxes as a contractor, probably more than that fuckwit AC above earns in a year) I would expect a scheme whos focus is on recovering money to not only fund itself, but to actually show a return - that is why it was set up wasn't it?

I'm not talking about spending 10 million pounds to catch a murderer, I'm talking about spending £100 000 to claw back £20 000 from some contractor - what is the point?

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

""Each contracted worker was fundamentally insecure, having neither a specified role in the company nor a particular line of duty beyond what was for time being allocated by the permanent staff."

It's about time this piece of shit legislation was binned. With the above statement, so many people that hmrc deem to earn enough to go after are now pretty much in the clear as far as IR35 goes. The people that the legislation was originally targetted at don't earn enough as individuals to make it worth their while to chase.

How much money does HMRC lose by trying to enforce IR35 again? I thought it was supposed to make a profit and pay for itself.

Apple cripples iBooks for jailbreakers

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"I don't see people people feeling too bad about doing it illegally when the legal option is forcibly removed"

Just cut'n'paste into the Sony thread for double the votes :)

Boffins devise 'cyberweapon' to take down internet

Sir Runcible Spoon
Heart

Sir

I used to work on the help desk at a major Uk ISP in the 90's and there were regular periods when there were route flaps on the network generated in US which would result in the eventual melt-down of the entire net.

It used to take around 4 hours to sort out. This was plenty of time to head to the pub for an extended lunch.

However, after about 6 months of this the peering operators got so practiced at sorting it out we eventually got a phone call to come back to the office just as we were about to order our first pint. In the end they could sort it out in about 20 minutes (this was before route flap damping btw).

This whole situation led to one of my fondest memories of the period when someone on the helpdesk stood up and announced (in a VERY loud voice) that 'They've got huge flaps in the States!' (Will you ever live that down Sam? :)

Pink Floyd guitarist pays McKinnon's health bills

Sir Runcible Spoon
Joke

Sir

"Syd was a genius"

Yes, but he flew too close to the Sun - failed to learn from Icarus.

Malware endemic even on protected PCs

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"Far more important than AV is making sure you are applying all the relevant updates for your OS and software, especially adobe flash and acrobat and your browser."

Absolutely agree. I have been running PC's without AV on the net since 95 and haven't had a single virus. Co-incidence?

(I do religiously update my O/S and other software of course, I'm not _completely_ brain-dead)

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

There are other ways to tell if you've been infected than an AV scan you know.

Street View to invade Israel?

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"do not allow certain areas of cities to be photographed "for security reasons"."

What about the areas where they regularly oppress a minority group with forced relocation?

First person to spot a Palistinian getting duffed up on streetcam wins a bacon sandwich.

Apple's casual Xbox: Apple TV seeded for online gaming

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

I already use an iPod touch just as a remote control for my Sonos sound kit, it works great.

And before anyone says that it's an expensive remote, just see how much the dedicated Sonos remote is. 8-O

First reports on XM-25 Judge Dredd smartgun in A'Stan

Sir Runcible Spoon
Flame

Sir

Absolutism is complete bollocks.

You know, I currently work at a bank, banks process money, some of the groups using this service are almost certainly involved in the war industry as it involves lots of money.

OMFG I'M A MURDERING TECHIE CHAIN-LINK THINGY!!!

I'd go and hand myself but that would be murder.

ps the first line is a joke in case you missed it :)

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"Had the allies in WW2 progressed technology and weapons at this peacetime and pathetic snails pace, we too would have lost that conflict."

I reckon that H&S is to blame. Sending troops out with experimental weapons every couple of months is going to back-fire on you in the form of casulaties non?

Texting teenager plunges to his death

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

from the bbc link..

"The law on this is vague but the police can - and do - use their discretion in judging these cases. "

I thought it was the Judges that judged, not the Ge^H^HPolice?

If the kid left in charge was 14 and deemed too young, can anyone tell me if the couple of 11 year olds who recently had a kid now have a criminal record? (Apart from making the front page of The Sun)

Kid spanks a grand on Xbox using Mum's bank card

Sir Runcible Spoon
FAIL

Sir

It doesn't help that M$ won't allow you to remove a credit card from the gamer account once it's been used. They only allow you to overwrite it with a new (and currently valid) one.

I had let my CC card company know that the card details had been cloned and to get a new number issued when they refused to remove it.

NEVER PUT YOUR CARD DETAILS ON XBOX LIVE!

Assange fights extradition in court

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"The point is that the Swedes have already answered this point and they do intend to charge him."

At the risk of sounding uninformed :P I was under the impression that an EAW was only valid if someone has actually 'been' charged (past tense) as opposed to 'going to be' charged.

I've seen a lot of rhetoric and quoted legalese, yet this point still remains to be answered does it not?

Sir Runcible Spoon
Troll

Sir

"Their voice or opinion carries the same weight as 'Joe the Plumber' has on Congress, the USDoJ or even the President of the US."

Or perhaps even Oprah? I can't imagine her opinion counts for much either then, but she did manage to put a black president in the whitehouse.

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

It doesn't matter 2 shits that the Swedish Police *might* have enough evidence to charge him or not.

They HAVEN'T charged him, so no-one should be going anywhere.

As for the spurious 'we'll know what to charge him with when we question him' line,

what, as they say, the fuck!

If they have evidence, they can charge him in absentia, issue a proper EAW and then he will *have* to be extradited I expect.

But they don't seem to want to do it the 'legal way' do they? Whyever not?

Critics slam feds for 'unprecedented' domain seizure

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

..and so 'the internet' routes around yet another problem with just a few lost packets.

When will they learn? ever?

Court orders seizure of PS3 hacker's computers

Sir Runcible Spoon
Joke

Sir

It's a virus with an extra eye of course.

Sir Runcible Spoon
Troll

Sir

I may be jumping to conclusions here, but your post reads like you condone rape of young boys - and you want a _hacker_ locked up!

I wish El Reg would change the AC handle to Anonymous Arsehole, because that seems to be the main* reason people post AC - i.e. to post something they are ashamed of admitting to with their regular handle.

*Unless the article is about privacy of course, and then it's de rigueur.

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

I hope Geo has had the sense to load up some virii to his machines before handing them over.

Perhaps a Sony Rootkit based worm called 'Chicken'.

That way it can go home to roost and shit all over their servers.

Mexican woman gets litigious on Top Gear's ass

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"team drinking"

That has fired up the old imagination I can tell you :D

Flickr thinks again about 4,000 pix loss

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"please do not fire the automatic weapons at the THERMONUCLEAR WARHEAD!!!!"

I never quite got that one, unless he was worried about richochets. How the hell are you supposed to set off a nuclear warhead with a bullet? Does the bullet come fully loaded with an activation key for the device?

Bit like the diesel 4x4 that Morpheus blew up in the follow up film to The Matrix. Mind you, I wouldn't put it past the yanks to build a 4x4 that was petrol and nitrous injected!

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

I would also have been more impressed if they had rolled out functionality that made it slightly more difficult to delete an account entirely.

Like starting with disabling access to it for a starters.

ICO drops BT, ACS Law probe

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

The ICO are as useful as..

a) a third nipple in the middle of my forehead

b) a chocolate fireguard

c) a can of petrol when you're dying of thirst

d) oh, whatever, they're just completely shite, let's get rid of them already.

Mexico demands apology for Top Gear outrage

Sir Runcible Spoon
Joke

Sir

Shouldn't that be 'piss off a ducks back' then ?

Oh the endless worldpay.

No new copters for Afghanistan troops

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

Perhaps kickbacks are larger on frigates than they are for choppers.

US lawmakers eye internet 'kill switch'

Sir Runcible Spoon
Flame

Sir

Internet Kill switch, just let some muppet loose in MAE EAST with a bgp update routing everything to Null0 and you're done.

Oh, they mean the 'ENTIRE' internet? Well, fuck the US. Who died and made them God?

They already have the ability to blackhole all US bound traffic at the perring points, just as long as they leave everyone else's advertisments alone. Still, there is a fair amount of stuff on US address space I suppose.

Seriously, if they are 'under attack' it would be simpler to have a protocol to pull the frigging wires out of the wall at the sounds of the siren yeah?

Newest PS3 firmware hacked in less than 24 hours

Sir Runcible Spoon
Pirate

Sir

" as each unit pirated is a sale lost"

That's a very crude assumption.

When I were a lad, I used to obtain copies of games to play because I didn't have enough money to buy the games, so there was no lost sale, just someone playing their stuff for free. If you could have taken those copied games away from me, it wouldn't have generated a sale.

When I earned enough money, I bought the games - no need to pirate.

Your statement is an incorrect absolute I'm afraid, as I am the exception to the rule, and I'm sure there are others.

Yarrr.

Wanted: 1 solution architect to fist bankers' asses

Sir Runcible Spoon
Headmaster

Sir

Don't you mean a grammar fail? Fist is a valid spelling after all :)

Judge rebukes 'World's No. 1 Hacker'

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

I didn't know the US had their own equivalent of Cpt. Cyborg! i.e. a nutter/pundit

LCD pushbutton sunglasses issued to US Navy SEALs

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

And there was me thinking US special ops put their sunglasses _on_ before entering a building with a view to destroying everything inside.

Still, these do sound pretty cool, where do I sign up?

YouTube honours shuttle dead with 'Workplace Safety' ad

Sir Runcible Spoon
Joke

Sir

I remembered the 7up and need another 7 astronaughts jokes, not so sure about the 'over there and over there' joke, although I did hear that the crew of Challenger went on their holidays, destination: all over Florida.

Oh, and the last thing said on the challenger?...

What does this button do?

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

Talking about inappropriate, I remember all the black humour that did the rounds at the time.

Why is it in the UK that it's possible for us to be horrified by something, yet able to laugh at a joke about it as well?

Toshiba intros laptop that CHANGES COLOUR

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

Did anyone else read the name on the lid and think 'Quasimodo' ?

No? Just me then.

Microsoft insists autistic Xboxer is a cheat

Sir Runcible Spoon
Joke

Sir

"if it was me, I'd spin kick you in the throat!"

Would you say it was society, or perhaps your homelife that has made you sound so violent?

I hope to hell it isn't all the fucking shoot'em ups your playing because that would just suck to realise all the nanny-staters were right all along!

FBI serves 40 search warrants in Anonymous crackdown

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"they actually have to pay the Plod to start an investigation "

I can just imagine the Scientologist coffers being depleted as we speak.

Blackadder style chemists transform gold into purest ... purple

Sir Runcible Spoon
WTF?

Sir

I'm assuming the down-voter doesn't know his BA :/ otherwise, wtf?

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

So, you think there's a market for jewellery that looks like snot do you?

Single complaint sparks police raid and total ban on rental movie

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"If there was a middle-class white guy singing lyrics like "that stupid nigger with his gold and his baseball cap" (when *meant* and not some sort of irony or parody) do you think that would be deemed to be acceptible for airplay? Of course not - people would be offended, and rightly so."

So, it's ok for a black person to use these words in a song then?

By that Logic, if Mark Knopfler is a faggot*, then he has every right to use the word he did, yeah?

</IRONY>

*In the UK this is also a term referring to a meatball.

Sir Runcible Spoon
Paris Hilton

Sir

My wife is pretty fucked up with regards to viewing material, so I've added both 'The Serbian Film' and 'The human centipede' to my lovefilm list.

Once she's watched them for us, I'll get her to write up a proper review and I'll post it on Lovefilm :) (or here)

US Wikileaks investigators can't link Assange to Manning

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"why would wikileaks be concerned about his defence costs ?"

Um, because that's what they said they would do? $15k isn't going to go very far, is it? hence the 'paltry' term.

Completely numpty celebrities offered more than that for Assange's bail ffs.

And although it does seem that Assange == Wikileaks, this isn't the full picture, even if he does seem to use the wikileaks pot'o'cash as his own personal fund-bag.

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"Wikileaks has contributed $15,000 to his legal defence fund"

"Wikileaks has contributed a paltry $15,000 to his legal defence fund"

fixed.

CoD: Black Ops 'not fit for purpose', fans claim

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

"And let's not forget the bugs in the likes of Jet Set Willy that prevented you from completing the game!"

Jet Set Willy was a journey, not a destination :)

</zen>

ACS:Law turns back on file-sharer court case

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

I was only just thinking that ACS Law are probably due a re-branding.

Beeb say sorry for Stephen Fry A-bomb quip

Sir Runcible Spoon
Troll

Sir

PC Madness <- there's your IT link right there.

Have you got a vendetta against El Reg having a vendetta?

If so, the rules of vendetta are clear.

WikiLeaks accused of tapping P2P for secret docs

Sir Runcible Spoon

Sir

Why are they worried about Wikileaks if they've got arseholes out there with secret documents being leaked onto p2p networks?