* Posts by BongoJoe

1327 publicly visible posts • joined 3 Apr 2010

Major outage at broadband biz 186k

BongoJoe
Flame

Re: no future?

"If you are currently experiencing an outage with your broadband service, please be advised that you will need to find an alternative provider as we are unable to continue to supply your current service."

This is all I am getting when I call 186k and Firenet Hosting.

Time to move the website and the IPS Tag too. The trouble is getting them to move it so I hope that Nominet can help...

Bloody hell, etc..

BongoJoe

Re: Web Hosting

Thanks for the reply. Looks like its time to find a new .asp host somewhere in Blighty.

Is they do go TITSUP then who releases all the pointers and records to the site? The databases and .asp files are all backed up, of course, so that that's not an issue but it's the clever back end admin stuff that I don't fully follow.

BongoJoe

Web Hosting

I have one of my major sites hosted by one of 186k's subsiduary companies and, at the moment, things look fine.

But one question that I have. How do the hosting companies connect and will this outage have any impact on hosted sites other than, of course, the risk of the company going TITSUP?

Can anyone who is more knowledgable in these matters care to pass on an opinion?

Icelandic Pirate Party sails away from attempt to form government

BongoJoe

Re: government wanted

How about getting the Eve Online players to form the government?

They have all the skills: economics, defence, construction and, er,c spreadsheets...

Men! If you want to win at board games this Christmas, turn off the rock music – scientists

BongoJoe

Re: Given the option of board games or rock music ...

Alas I can't find any relative willing to play a 'quick' game of 1825 or Civilisation. And neither can I get anyone to get hammered at Monopoly (the game where 99% of the players think that they know the rules but don't).

So it's the drink for me as the wife and daughter will be playing 50s 'cheerful' Christmas music. Another reason to sit in the kitchen with a good book whilst 'looking after' the turkey.

BT will HATE us for this one weird 5G trick

BongoJoe

Re: Streetlights? What are they?

You're lucky.

We have one streetlight in our village and that's about a quarter of a mile from the phone box; which is due to be removed in a few weeks as no-one has made a call from it in years. Not surprising as it doesn't accept coins and no-one understands how these are supposed to work.

We don't even get mobile coverage worrth speaking about apart from one bar of Vodaphone every now and then. No data unless one accidentally gets 'downwind' of EirComm over the water...

Information on smart meters? Yep. They're great. That works, right? – UK.gov

BongoJoe

Re: Gosh, but it is sooooo useful

But as far as smart meters go, I'm sure my neighbours in the hills with a large attic don't want to have to explain to the plods why they're using 20kW of lighting

Which is why Yr Ploddiau have helicopters...

Firmware freakout sends Epson Wi-Fi printers into reboot loop

BongoJoe

Alternative Solution

Buy new ink cartridges from our store. Guaranteed not to cause reset loops*.

*Mostly because the current overpriced cartridges didn't in the first place.

Uber is watching your smartphone's battery charge

BongoJoe
Coat

Re: I vote for "can't resist grabbing everything"

But continuing with

"Your purchasing history suggests that you wear your genitals on the outside. In that case we'll forgo the shoeshop..."

Microsoft says LinkedIn will make Trump, Brexit, voters feel great again

BongoJoe

Re: What will LinkedIn actually do then?

>Boland's Right Hand. Thanks for those links.

Both worrying, the second one more because there's this stand industry of creating news out of no news at all. Plus the list of self important job titles that people have given themselves.

The terminology used: "thought leader" for example. It just makes me shudder.

Anyway, thanks for the links and it reminds me why I left the mind crippling LinkedIn years ago if these are the sort of people who live there.

As for the main article. I have wondered many a time whose job it is to go through each company merger and plough through reams of corporate management documentation, have countless internal meetings of one's own and then produce judgment. That has got to be one of the most soul crushing non-jobs ever created.

Take that, creationists: Boffins witness birth of new species in the lab

BongoJoe

Up until the fat bloke in a Coke-Cola suit part I was shouting out "I know this one; it's Mithras, isn't it?"

BongoJoe

Re: Its not just the creationists ...intelligent design, my arse.

And the appendix.

Furthermore; why the nipples?

Local TV presenter shouted 'f*cking hell' to open news bulletin

BongoJoe

Re: Good for ratings!

I tell you, after seeing a few of their programmes they're going to need all the help they can get.

The whole day's programmes appear to be presented by the same three people and the level of professionalism has never been lower. Imagine three students* during Rag Week doing an all-day news channel and this would be the result.

It was compulsive viewing when we were in the North East just because it was so bloody bad.

(* when students were students)

Eugene Kaspersky is now personally defending your feet

BongoJoe

Size Eight?

I have always wondered how people with such small feet manage to stay upright in strong winds.

Whiffy kitchen after last night's chips? Clear the air with SPACE PLASMA

BongoJoe

You're right, if it does cause sufficient RF interference to bugger up the neighbour's telly then there is a problem.

They live half a mile away.

BongoJoe

The noise

Would be the only thing that would put me off this. Sort that out and I'm sold.

Virgin Media is so rustic and artisan you get to hand-sort your own spam

BongoJoe

Re: FYI

An asshole is what you get when you drop a donkey through the roof

Small ISPs 'probably' won't receive data retention order following IP Bill

BongoJoe

Re: If I said the next thing a say will be a lie and the last thing I said was the truth

What they will have to do is remove the part about not saving anything, thus alerting everyone to the fact the government has knobbled them

Eggsactly! This is much the reason why the AA patrolman used to salute you if saw your car. Because if he didn't you were supposed to stop and talk to him.

The reason why he wouldn't salute is that around the next bend is a speed trap that he wasn't allowed to tell you about. But getting you to stop and restart would be sufficient...

Allow us to sum this up: UK ISP Plusnet minus net for nine-plus hours

BongoJoe

About 900Kb/s outside of aptly named Analog. So as good as ever.

More than half of punters reckon they can't get superfast broadband

BongoJoe

You stop moaning. I live on Pen Llŷn and I can't get more than 1Mb/s.

BongoJoe

Re: Disruption

I live on the thirteenth floor of my block... ...and you're not digging up my window box.

China cites Trump to justify ‘fake news’ media clampdown. Surprised?

BongoJoe

Re: Who to punish...

There goes then classics such as "World War II Bomber Found On Moon"...

Emergency services 4G by 2020? And monkeys could fly out of my butt

BongoJoe
WTF?

4G on the Llŷn Peninsula within the next four years?

Or will that be

No emergency services on the Llŷn Peninsula within the next four years?

WileyFox Swift 2: A new champ of the 'for around £150' market

BongoJoe

Re: Original Swift and Storm suffered compass problems

Oh yes, the compass.

Either I am standing at the south pole and north is all around me or I an standing on a massive electro-magnectic doo-dah, or I have a WileyFox Swift.

BongoJoe

SD Card

I have the Swift (not this new version) and I am not impressed when I was informed that I couldn't use my SD card for memory (I have dual SIM) and the same happened to my wife who was only using one SIM.

This resulted in us both nothing having anything like as much memory available as we had the day before the 'upgrade' so that didn't please us much.

She's now put her Swift to one side and has now bought a Galaxy S7 Edge. There are a number of issues with this new Swift which concern me; first is that the screen display doesn't appear to be an improvement, I am dubious about the SD card memory given our recent experiences. And, lastly, which is an issue with the company themselves; they never honoured our Cashbacks on our previous purchases of these two phones despite sending documentation and all follow-up eMails have been ignored.

I am looking for a new phone and, so far, with my experiences and this review I feel that this isn't going to be it as this feels just a little like too much of the same.

Married man arrives at A&E with wedding ring stuck on todger

BongoJoe

Re: A wedding ring...

Wonder how many thumbs up?

Depends on up where, I suppose...

McDonald's sues Italian city for $20m after being burger-blocked

BongoJoe

Re: The real reason

To my mind, there's nothing on par with a good cask blonde beer. I wouldn't drink Newcastle Brown if you paid me

Nor I. It used to be a good brew until they moved the brewery to a factory across the river.

BongoJoe

...and the litter? And, that bloody smell which can only come from a McUnfood place?

BongoJoe

Re: *GOOD*

...You mean there isn't a Florence in Las Vegas, like the rest of Europe which appears to be there?

And, yes, I have met Merkins in Los Angeles who do think that it's just as good to go to Las Vegas to see the sights rather than the real thing.

And, yes-yes, I am glad that that they have built this in Las Vegas to.... (fill in the blank yourself; I have lost the the will to type)

The Reg seeks online community manager

BongoJoe

But surely not as good as

"Blind sculptor seeks volumtuous model"

which was spotted many years ago in a New York publication.

No spin zone: Samsung recalls 3M EXPLODING washing machines

BongoJoe

Re: At least they're recalling them, unlike Whirlpool.

They're offering to take my drier off my hands and replace with a new one for over £90. That's ninety quid of my funds!

Cheeky bastards! In the meantime it's still "safe" as long as I don't leave it plugged in overnight or use it unattended. I am hoping that it catches fire (just slightly, mind you) so I can sue the bastards.

Oh, the part will be replaced, they say, next March.

Teen in the dock on terror apologist charge for naming Wi-Fi network 'Daesh 21'

BongoJoe

Re: medieval murder bastards

...the name of which I won't be embroidering on the back of my denim jacket.

A British phone you're not embarrassed to carry? You heard that right

BongoJoe

Re: Great phone - but dodgy support

Fast forward 11 months and (1) I am still being spammed by Wileyfox and (2) I am still waiting for the free screen protector I was supposed to get when I registered.

I am still waiting for the rebate on the phones I bought back way-when. In fact, I am waiting for them to respond to the emails that I have been sending them.

The chances of me getting new WileyFox handsets for BongoJoe Villas is, excuse pun, swiftly diminishing.

Bookmakers William Hill under siege from DDoS internet flood

BongoJoe

"The DDoS attack is only doing what the government should have done. Online gambling should never have been made legal in the first place."

You can sod right off, Mr Anonymous Coward and shove the Daily Mail up your arse whilst your'e at it. Restricting a legitimate trade because it doesn't suit your world view.

Let's get rid of insurance web sites (you know where we risk a small stake if we're 'lucky' enough to back the event that the contents of the house catches fire), life insurance, forex and so on and so forth.

If you can't understand probability, risk and such then perhaps you need to go to some Nanny State someplace elsewhere.

BongoJoe

Re: What are the odds...?

Maybe some kids might eat better this week.

Not at all. Most of the people in my circle make a living from punting.

So a DDoS would more than likely make mine eat less.

Not all of us are whining puritantical Yanks.

BongoJoe

Re: Big picture

> 2. Who gets to gain most? (mmm...other betting sites? Someone who put a VERY large bad bet on)

What you would do here is to put another very large bet on the same event thus getting the bookmaker to reduce the odds.

The price will be reflected on the exchanges and then you can lay off the event there. And, if you do it right you can have an arbitration position where you make a profit no matter which what the outcome is.

No nudes, bloated apps, Android sucks and 497 other complaints about Apple to the FTC

BongoJoe

Re: Extended coverage

I have a bulging crotch -- worship me...

No, doesn't seem to match up with those cheerless bastards in Corinthians, does it?

Groupon buys Living Social

BongoJoe

Re: Are they still around?

Ah, but group buying is a good way to get services.

Our council, for example, have organised group buying for gas and electricity. I don't have mains gas but use heating oil which, yes, we get through group buying.

Web devs want to make the Internet of S**t worse. Much worse

BongoJoe

Re: Why the F...

Quite.

Sends message to toaster: makeToast TWO_SLICES, LIGHT_MEDIUM_BROWN

Error message received: ERROR_BREAD_STILL_IN_BAG

So unless I want dried bread being toasted and left hanging above the toaster over night and folding over so it won't go in automatically when the toaster starts its best that I do it myself. Manually.

Unless of course I get a toaster which has a magazine for bread above and which keeps the flies off then this isn't going to work and I am going to have a massive ugly hunk of metal/plastic in my kitchen.

And since toast takes about a minute to make; you know the amount of time it takes to locate a plate, a knife, butter and spread of choice then there is no reason to have this automated because bone has to be there to eat it still warm.

Idiot idea.

So long Vine, your six seconds of internet fame are over

BongoJoe
Facepalm

Oops

I came here thinking it was the old networking doo-dah, Banyan Vines.

Got a great IoT story to tell? You have until Friday to let us know

BongoJoe

Re: IoT a bit overrated

No-one has managed to explain how my fridge knows when my locally sourced bacon has run out or that the veg in the bottom needs replacing or even that I need more eggs.

Moreover, what does it do if it can? Tell the local farmer, smallholder or chap with a box full of eggs for sale down the lane?

How does that all work? How does it know which apiarist to contact for more honey or chap with own still for the gin?

Note that all of the above items will have no barcodes nor RFI chips and the producers, as I like my food local and fresh, will be on grid.

So how will this work for me?

My Nest smoke alarm was great … right up to the point it went nuts

BongoJoe

Re: @ Andrew Jones 2

I suspect the reason for your down vote collection was that you failed to use the Headmaster icon...

UK will build new nuclear bomb subs, says Defence Secretary

BongoJoe
Mushroom

PPI for the future

Since we've hived off current electricity production to the French, the transit systems to the French (again) and to the Germans, the water to about everyone with a cheque book, the future power production to the Chinese; why not go for the full sweep and see if we can get the Russians to build Trident for us?

icon (just because) ---->

In the name of love, don't scalp your U2 aka Dreamfest tickets, warns Salesforce

BongoJoe

Re: Achtung Baby, LOL

Not quite what I imagine angst-ridden rock and roll to be when I was growing up in the seventies...

Criticize Donald Trump, get your site smashed offline from Russia

BongoJoe

Re: Trump will win

United Kingdom != England

<sigh />

User couldn't open documents or turn on PC, still asked for reference as IT expert

BongoJoe

Once? I do this daily.

Samsung: And for my next trick – exploding WASHING MACHINES

BongoJoe

Re: Flood

1) Never buy a Hotpoint

We've got a Hotpoint clothes drier. We're on the list to get it repaired because the model we have tends to catch fire.

Our date for when the engineer comes around is March of next year so either they have millions of units to fix or they're not taking our safety and well being as strongly as they claim.

Anyway as long as he doesn't come during the Cheltenham Festival week then that will be fine.

BongoJoe

I had one of these top loaders explode on me when I was living in Norway. It turned out that the spring on the door of the stainless steel drum failed causing the inner door to open when on maximum spin cycle.

Needless to say the bits from the drum catching on the inside of the external box at full speed wasn't at all healthy for the washing machine as a whole and 'explosion' is a good description of what happened next.

Though it was purely mechanical in nature and nothing to do with expanding gases; other than of mine as I was about two feet from it at the time...

HP Ink COO: Sorry not sorry we bricked your otherwise totally fine printer cartridges

BongoJoe

HP 4000

My black ink workhorse of a printer, the aforementioned HP 4000, is still going strong and I do buy third party cartridges for it.

I would go as far to say that for a non-colour printer it's more or less perfect for my needs and is certainly better than the modern 'home use' one-shot printers which are around these days.

Yes, this is the reason for sticking with a great printer: the modern consumable printers in which when one runs out of ink one buys a new printer is a disgrace and I refuse to go down that line, especially when I have a fine printer that works well.

Will US border officials demand social network handles from visitors?

BongoJoe

Somewhere I have a CiX and a Compuserve account but, I am buggered if I can remember what they are/were.