* Posts by BongoJoe

1327 publicly visible posts • joined 3 Apr 2010

Lead ONTO your pencil: Bill Gates pours cash into graphene condoms

BongoJoe
Coat

Re: To paraphrase

Well... a condom does Embrace, Extend and Extinguish doesn't it ?

What? it gives the lady a cuddle afterwards?

Half-blind Glassholes rejoice! 'Prescription' Google goggles a-comin'

BongoJoe
Thumb Up

Re: And what about people with hearing aids?

An excellent post.

BongoJoe
Mushroom

Re: And what about people with hearing aids?

To be honest I am utterly intolerant towards those with umbrellas. In rural parts they are plain silly and a hat would do better. In urban areas they are an inconsideration towards others and, again, a hat would be better.

And, yes, I have had 'discussions' in the past with those in cities, particularies knobs with golf umbrellas who take up one fathom of pavement and then stick a pointed part in one's face.

Intolerance towards umbralla users should be tolerated.

Vintage wine laid down in 1600 BC was 'psychotropic'

BongoJoe
Coat

Re: Bring in Dogfish Head!

Well, if I were living in America then I would hope that the research into ancient ales would finally create something drinkable.

Mystery traffic redirection attack pulls net traffic through Belarus, Iceland

BongoJoe
Thumb Up

Re: Datacentre Question

Don't forget the home of the wonderful CCP Games...

BongoJoe
Black Helicopters

Re: Nice sales pitch at the end...

I was wondering if I ought to tell my eighty-two year old aunt to start monitoring the IP packets between her and the local WI. After all, that recipe for plum jam may be hijacked and stolen.

Tiny, invisible EXTRATERRESTRIAL INVADERS appear at South Pole

BongoJoe
Facepalm

Re: Who to truly believe

And 100 years ago + cancer used to be 1 in 1000, now 1 in 2.

If science truly knew the truth, why is science killing more humans more than ever.

Common sense is weak in this one.

Okay, I'll bite. Cancer happens to all of us if we live long enough. A hundred years ago we weren't living as long and neiher was it as detectable as it is now. A hundred years ago, as we were about to be queing up to be slaughted in the trenches, when someone died it was perhaps due to malnutrician, TB, industrial accident or an ealer old age. No-one would bother to cut open Old Man Higgings to find he had cancer.

Using this statistic is like saying "Air bags in cars causes more broken legs than before".

I think that you're either Steve Hillage or Eric von Dankein and I claim my five pounds.

BongoJoe
Facepalm

Re: Who to truly believe

I can guarantee you that the "frequency" of Earth differs from the frequency of Mars (or any other planet).

Enlighten me. In terms of Hertz, what is the frequency of Earth and and how does this compare with the frequency of the other planets?

BongoJoe
WTF?

Re: Who to truly believe

If one "lived" on Mars (or any other planet) the maths would have different outcomes due to the frequency output of that planet.

I think that if this were the case and, say, pi were an integer then the Mars Rover's wheels would have fallen off my now.

Winamp is still a thing? NOPE: It'll be silenced forever in December

BongoJoe

Re: Forgot all about that

...always easy to spot the drummers on here, isn't it? :)

BongoJoe

Re: useful features

I use FoorBar via a DAC through an USB port (i.e. avoiding the Windows mangling of the sound) and it's simply wonderful.

+1 from me too.

PANIC OVER DROOPING house prices hits MEMBER-shaped estate

BongoJoe

Hmm

Must be rather chilly there....

No more Service Packs for Microsoft Office? HA! Think again, Ballmer!

BongoJoe
Windows

Re: Oops. I'm ten years behind

Just trying to create styles in 2007 is painful, in 2010 it's sheer torture.

It's easier to write code in VB which links via COM to the temptate and via home-brewed code and dilog boxes to make the styles there. Only this morning I was trying to edit some tab positions in a style and I was almost driven to tears/drink/typewriters.

In 2007/2010 the ribbon is just chock full of useless styles invented by the cockwombles in the MS Marketing Division which are no use to man nor beast.

As an improvement on earlier versions of Office, 2007/2010 isn't.

MANUAL STIMULATION: Whack me with some proper documentation

BongoJoe

Re: Postcode expansion

Alas most of these aren't too intelligent to understand that not everyone is fortunate to live in a propery which doesn't have a number or a street name.

BongoJoe

Other moronic assumptions:

- All houses have house numbers or street names.

- That I can find my county in a list of dropdowns which was accurate only up until 1972

- Pigeon holing my job as in Forestry, Accounting, Insurance, etc..

BongoJoe

Re: Spot on.

Dcumentation? I remember the old Microsoft C (before the days of Visual Studio) when the documentation came in a box four feet long.

Google deletes Maps satellite photos of 14-year-old's unsolved murder

BongoJoe

That'll be Bob Shaw's SLOW GLASS then.

iSpy with my little eye: Apple wants to track your every move

BongoJoe
Windows

Puzzled

I have never been into an Apple store. In fact I have never seen one and I don't even think that the nearest one in this country is less than four hours drive from here. Which is, of course, how it should be.

Anyway, I am curious as to how all this works. If I am walking around the store looking at things and their price tags would I want to have my phone beep and there's a message telling me what I now already know?

After the fitfh or six thing I am looking at and message received wouldn't I get a little tired of this? Or have I missed the point entirely?

Post-Profit Prophet RUSSELL BRAND is the HUMBLE CHRIST of STARTUPS

BongoJoe
Headmaster

eh?

Ninety Nine Red Balloons, Floating In The Summer Sky. (Thank you for that timeless classic, Nico!)

I remember the Nina Hagen version of this (the German version was my favourite) but was it really Nico's?

Whovians, your Doctor needs you: Take back the Day from One Direction

BongoJoe

Re: Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

You were doing so well until the last paragraph.

Mind you that line with the snot running down his nose was rather good, I have to say.

BongoJoe

Re: Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

Exactly. I remember the T Rex/Slade thing back in the 70s.

Bitcoin mining rig firm claims $3m revenue in just FOUR DAYS

BongoJoe

Diversity?

BongoJoe

Re: Huh?

Saddam Hussein was very rich and decided to do just that. He announced that he was no longer going to sell oil in dollars.

Within two months the tanks were moving...

BongoJoe

Re: I really don’t understand?????

By that I meant that they were no worse than any other country kicking off the first world war. In fact it could be argued that they were dragged into it by The Austria-Hungarian Empire who forced them into it by their multualy protective treaty.

None of the other European countries comes out with any credit.

But this, I fear, is beyond the scope of the topic.

BongoJoe

Re: I really don’t understand?????

Maharg

A good question. But I will try to respond as this is a complex subject of which I understand a little. But I think that the gist is this.

Once upon a time money was used. say gold, as medium of exchange. Now, I remember from my Commerce lessons back in the 70s that money had to be three things to make it useful and therefore 'valuable'. These were scarcity, durability and portability.

It was no use having money made out of leaves (see HHgttG) nor having money too large to cart around and it was no use it falling apart. So gold became the de-facto standard because, essentially, gold is gold is gold. One could have used diamonds, for example, but some diamonds are bigger than others and some are better than others. So we all settled on gold. it could well have been any othe precious metal but it was gold.

Once upon a time the wealth of a nation was how much gold it had. The money in circulation was backed by gold. If you look at a British Five Pound note today it still says "I promise to pay the bearer the sum of five pounds" (or words to that effect) and that is signed by the chief cashier of the Bank of England. This meant that I could wander down to Threadneedle Street and swap my note for some scraps of gold.

And that's how commerce worked. Gold was mined, stord in vaults and notes were used in place of the gold.

Then some bright spark decided that we ought to liberate our money from the gold. Which meant that the countries can print as much money as they like. Now this is where the complete bonkers Magic Money Tree comes into life. If you print more money then you have, er, more money. Of course it becomes that slightly less worth but no-one minds especially if you call it Quantitive Easing and say that it's a Good Thing. But don't look too closely, play the game of musical chairs and hope that no-one points out the Emperor's New Clothes.

Before the second world war, Germany had to pay repairations for the first world war. They were found to be 'to blame' for all. Only in the sense that they lost and, therefore, they were the Bad Guys. As if having a good proportion of its young men killed wasn't enough the Allies punished them with crippling debts that they had to pay.

They had no choice to pay but paying them would mean that the country would go broke. If they paid it all back in installments then the bankrupcy would have been long and painful and would have gone on for decades or more. So what they did was was rather clever; the Weimar Government printed all the Marks it needed and paid off the debt. Of course the Marks were effectively worthless as they were backed by thin air (as in your message) and then hyper-inflation set in as a loaf of bread costs millons of Marks when it cost only thousands yesterday.

Hyper inflation is what happens when one has too much money trying to chase too few goods.

And, as an aside, this is one of the dangers facing the US Treasury. We all know that the US Debt is alarming. However, to pay the bills more money has to be printed which means that the dollar is getting to be less and less valuable. And sooner or later unless the US actually reduces the deficit (I don't mean slowing the increase, I mean making the debt smaller) then some day soon someone is going to say "Oi, these dollars; they're not so valuable now, are they?" and then the US is going to have major problems all because the dollar isn't backed by anything but goodwill (at the end of the day a currency is either backed by an agreed tangiable asset or goodwill). If the dollar is devalued then there's quiestions about the PetroDollar as this is the only thing that's keeping the country afloat -- because of this Magical Money Pump (money comes into the Treasury from the sale of the oil somewhere, it goes around the US and then out again) the dollar is seen to be a strong currency.

But devalue the dollar and the lads from the Middle East may decide to go into another currency and then there's no limit to the potential plunge.

It's not only currencies which are subject to this. We had, not in living memory, the Tulip Bulb Bubble when people decided that tulip bulbs, especially rare ones,. were worth a small fortune. The mayhem and madness of the markets as people wanted to get in on these is much the same... until the music stops and then the market comes to its collective senses and says "I am not buying a tulip bub for the price of a town house" and then the price comes crashing down. All currencies which aren't backed by something, be it gold, good will or the Magic Petroleum Money Pump are liable to this.

BitCoin is not dissimilar in that it's not backed by anything so in that sense it's "worthless" but on the side of the coin (excuse pun) there is only going to be a limited amount of these BitCoins so, in theory, they ought to settle down in value.

What is the value of a BitCoin? Well, if you deal wth stocks at all then you will know that the price of a share is determined by one person thinking he wants to get out, that the share is undervalued, whilst the other party thinks it's undervalued and wants to get in. Value is just one person's peception and when two people have two different opinions on value then we have a market and that is what determines the price.

The same applies to any free markets; what I peceive to be good value I will buy into or go long and what I think is poor value I will sell or go short. If I wished to trade in BitCoin and think that the price will increase, ie the coin is undervalued, then I will buy them. If I think that the whole thing is overvalued, as I do as I believe it to be a bubble, then I will either short or keep away.

And yes, they are writing "IOU 5 Internetz" but I may sell that IOU tomorrow for six to someone else who may think that they can get seven for it.

All I am saying is that scratch down far enough and you'll find thin air which makes economics both interesting and frightening at the same time.

This is my take on it. Cue to downvoters...

Google SO CAN scan ALL BOOKS onto its sites - judge

BongoJoe

Re: Eh

But as an author you would know that under copyright laws extracts of your book can be quoted.

I would imagine it would be more like Amazon's Look Inside but to a lesser extent as, from what I gather, this Look Inside contains more text than an extract would so special permission would have been sought.

So, there you are. A budding author. Your book is up there with a link from Google to your blog along with the tens of thousands of books from other first time novelists. Wouldn't it be good if the public, who found your blog, could find a paragraph or two of your purple prose within the search engine?

This law has been present for as long as I can remember. Somone is finally using it properly. I would imagine there are a lot of authors who wouldn't be happy with this; those would be the ones with a deserved one star rating from me on Amazon who took, under false pretences, money for literature.

Microsoft fears XP could cause Indian BANKOCALYPSE

BongoJoe

Re: XP 2.0?

Any IT department with a clue will be able to workaround them and migrate to XP, the only barrier being cost.

Exactly. (my emphasis)

BongoJoe

Re: XP 2.0?

XP 2.0... like W7 then?

Yes, but without the newly introduced features which tend to get in the way. In fact, a good XP2 would be XP with a few of its bugs killed.

Adding new bugs and bits that annoy users is not the way to encourage take-up. If W7 worked as promised then there would be about three XP machines left running in the UK. The fact that there's a strong reluctance to regrade must indicate to someone that there's not a real compelling reason other than scary stories of trolls under the bridge watiting for the unwary who don't have Aero to protect them.

I would be a massive fan of W7 if the following basic conditions were met:

1. It would run as fast as XP

2. XP Compability mode were compatable with, say, XP

3. The networking would be stable and not lose shares, machines or even forget where the machine was

4. That File Explorer would refresh if two, or more, instances were open

The last two, I would have thought, were basic and relatively easy to solve. The second should have been mandatory before W7 left the 'manufacturing plant' and the first point, whilst I can't expect miracles, it ought to come close.

Fix these four things and I will say Goodbye to XP forever.

BT Sport scores own goal with £897m Champions League footie rights deal

BongoJoe

Re: BBC

One will happen. The other will not.

Do you need to guess which?

The TRUTH behind Microsoft Azure's global cloud mega-cock-up

BongoJoe

Re: GM Foods

Is there a need? Won't these plants just die on their arse when challenged by the natural variety in their usual habitat?

Like Japanese Knotweed, American Stink Cabbage, Himalayan Balsam to mention just three?

One of the problems with these invasive plants is that the insects which would normall be expected to devour them haven't yet been imported/designed.

Stuxnet infected Russian nuke power plant - Kaspersky

BongoJoe
Holmes

methinks

that after the latest PR debacle with Kaspersky borking Windows machines, they've come up with this one to spin some positives.

</mode cynic=off>

Thought you didn't need to show ID in the UK? Wrong

BongoJoe

Re: @Bongo Jo What exactly is the problem here?

Well, I can't "prove" why, but being there and witnessing this many a time I can give evidence.

You there. Moroccon chap. ID now. No, not you dozens of clearly white Europeans, you move on.

The racism of the police in Belgium was horrendous at the time; I don't know what it's like now. We used to have a few of the Rikswacht (the 'red' or state police) drink in our local bar and they made no bones about their attitudes to how they picked on people. Again, can I prove this? No, but I have heard it from them.

It goes further.; run a cafe and soon you'll be asked to pay to enter an offical tourist guide of bars and restaurants that no-one has ever seen. Refuse and you don't get your sticker in the window and then the fun starts. Expect to then be raided frequently by the police and shut down repeatedly for fire hazards until you pay for a sticker in the window and, lo and behold, your care/bar is now safe from fire risk.

Again, I can't prove this but I have first hand evidence of this.

And the police in the UK? My father was a copper in Yorkshire. He left the force after what he had seen within the ranks. I was thinking of coppering as a career until the Miners' Strike. So, kindly don't give me any bollocks as to how good the police anywhere are.

BongoJoe

Re: What exactly is the problem here?

As a Belgian you ought to be aware of the problem.

I have lived in Antwerpen and I have seen on a number of occasions the police stop people in the street for no good reason and demand to see their ID card. No ID card? Then off to the police station with you and an immediate fine of (in the 80s) of around 7000 BEF and a night in the cells.

The police were just picking on people in the street for no good reason other than to pick on them.

BongoJoe
Black Helicopters

My ID Card...

...when I lived in Norway* stated that my date of birth was the 32nd of February 2099.

I had no end of fun and games with that. I was often requested to ask for a replacement but I always refused.

*yes, I know they don't have an official ID card, at least not then, but you got an offical bank card with your official Person Number which included the date of birth as above.

Does F-Secure's antivirus turn a blind eye to spook spyware? CEO hits back

BongoJoe

Re: Only one company has any street cred with me..

Thanks for the suggestion. I have got tired of Kaspersky making my machine slow as molasses. It's now gone into the same 'File 13' as did Panda when they brought in their all singing, all dancing, all stopping system.

Off to try Emsosoft on my test machine.

Dying HealthCare.gov bagged JUST SIX registrations on first day

BongoJoe

Re: My experience

As an aside I registered for an NS&I account the other day where in the UK so that I could do stuff with my Premium Bonds. I was told to choose a password which had to have upper and lower case characters, numeric characters and at least one special character.

After failing to have a password approved by the system ("You must have at least one special character") despite the thing being littered with them, I was forced to ring the help desk.

Many levels of security questions later I found out that 'special characters' didn't include $, %, * and anything with those in (clearly concerned about SQL injection) would be rejected. But was there any indication of this anywhere on their site or literature? No.

Google barge erection hypegasm latest - What's in the box?

BongoJoe
Black Helicopters

Two coasts...

Since it's over on two different coasts I wonder if it is a quantum computing project or demonstration.

The Colosseum, Hagia Sophia, Tower of London... and, er, Steve Jobs' GARAGE

BongoJoe
Headmaster

Re: Find the odd thing out

The Tower didn't have any 'torture cellar'. Any forms of persuation of mechanical means were done in the imates own room.

No doubt for early Health and Safety reasons.

SECRET Google store touts pricey accessories to Glasshole shopaholics

BongoJoe

Two words

Fuck. Me.

Digital radio may replace FM altogether - even though nobody wants it

BongoJoe
Headmaster

Re: I love dab

Living in the country side we keep loosing stations on fm whilst with dab it can stay tuned in.

I live in the same countryside and I can't get it. Now I know why; you've loosened it.

BongoJoe

Re: All you DAB naysayers forget one thing

Privacy? If I had DAB then I wouldn't be bothered by any reception either.

Someone here mentioned that DAB has been going for over a decade. Not seen a sniff of it here.

In a meeting with a woman? For pity's sake don't read this

BongoJoe

Go to a meeting, deal with other people. Turn off the phone or put it on silent and deal with missed calls during a suitable break.

It's common courtesy which, alas, appears not to be common any more.

A steam punk VDU ?

BongoJoe

Actually the light erases the charge IIRC so the moment you've looked at it you've erased it. :(.

Well, that ought to confound the boujders and other assorted enemies of Her Imperious Majesty.

As for the laser printer part; yes you're right. I just imagined something that bangs and crashes with massive sparks from the van der Graaf generators and the flickering limelight behind.

And, what's more it could be portable. In a fashion.

BongoJoe

I would imagine a large typewriter striking the back of something which is statically charged which is translucent. Then we have a continual fall of carbon down the back which sticks to the whatever has been struck.

Some sort of lighting burning behind the whole thing to make the thing stand out and there you have it.

editing? The same way as in vi or ed.

Malc

Please, PLEASE, Skype... Don't kill our apps and headsets, plead devs

BongoJoe

Re: What they need is more...

You have hit the nail on the head there. I have a massive Visual Studio 6 project (which works still though ADO is now crap with the new improved operating systems called Vista, Win 7 etc) and the only course for me is for a massive rewrite, which could take months, into .Net.

But what guarantee is there that that won't be dropped and made incompatible in future releases of Windows?

Once upon a time one could choose alternate compilers such as Borland C, Turbo Pascal, Delphi, Objective C and so on and they'd work. Now it just feels that it's .Net is the only way to go and this frightens me because who is to say that we won't be having threads on here soon saying ".Net is now twelve years old, it is now obselete".

Silverlight? I don't think that I ever saw that live in the wild. Windows Live? I see a lot of these applets appear on new machines as does crapware on new computers.

Pac-Man GHOST nebula is literally the coolest thing in the universe – boffins

BongoJoe

Isn't that the evidence that our somewhat less than levelled headed chums in the Hubbardian Cult are looking for that Xenu exists as a ghostly hooded figure?

Samsung patent points to hi-tech glasses project

BongoJoe

This design is of a type [of glasses] with earphones integrated, allowing [users] to take phone calls and listen to music during workouts.

What sad and pathetic lives they must think that we live if this is the sort of stuff which we aspire to be doing. If we aspire to having a lifestyle with 'workouts' then aim higher; live in the country, get a dog and go for walks. And if your aspirations are to be connected to the office 24/7 then aim higher and aspire to heave the bloody thing into a lake. But don't have the aforementioned dog fetch it.

As ChrisG above describes it; this was the reason why Sam Tyler went back to 1974.

If people think that they need to be plugged in like this then they really, really ought to wake up, get out of their houses of ticky-tacky and consider what they are doing with their lives. Get out, slow down and burn that frigging suit and consider that the phone and connected technology away from the desk is for cinema listings, restaurant reviews and not to be plugged into the Hive Mind.

Obama to Merkel: No Americans are listening to you on this call

BongoJoe

Re: Its like when you have proof that a politician is lying...

Just of out morbid curiosity, how do you propose any nation "punishes" the US?

Simple. Stop using the Dollar as the currency for the international petroleum trade. Without the PetroDollar the US would go bust overnight.

Baywatch babe Pamela Anderson battles bullfighting

BongoJoe

Re: Not a fair fight

Don't they always let the bull live in a Portuguese corrida?

Yes, the bull leaves the ring alive. But not the stadium.

Microsoft boffins test rival 'Google Glass' geek goggles, say insiders

BongoJoe
Flame

The Inconsiderate Nature of These

One of the things that I detest about the mobile phone culture is that if I am taking to someone who is standing in front of me then most of the time an incoming call will take priority. We've already, thankfully, have had a backlash from a supermarket till assistant who refused to serve someone who was talking on their mobile and not engaging with them.

I see this all the time in the local supermarket and the assistants feel quite put out by people on the phone whilst being served.

It's worse with the Uhuru style Bluetooth attachments that are placed in the year. Not only will the wearer break the immediate face-to-face conversation but the message implied by the wearer is "if I get a call then it's going to be more important than you and I won't listen to you at all"

These glasses are going to go one step further; they're saying that the wearer is going to disengage at any moment from the person in front of them without warning.

Thankfully here in the sticks we get precious few tossers with phones implanted in their ears and, as a whole, they are not accepted as a social norm by the locals. I can see these glasses being accepted even less.

Living in a city or, as it seems to be called, a metro area should be no excuse for bad manners and ill consideration for others.