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* Posts by Captain Jack

16 posts • joined 18 Feb 2010

No small iPhone 5, says mole

Captain Jack
Joke

Fingers

The fingers you are using to dial are too big, please mash the keypad with your palm to obtain a special dialing wand :-)

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Becks offloads Posh Porsche on eBay

Captain Jack
Joke

Colour

Comes in any colour... as long as it's black.

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BOFH: Pain fear games

Captain Jack
Thumb Up

I second this!

Totally agree, love the BOFH stories they always brighten my Friday.

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BOFH: Robot wars

Captain Jack
Happy

Advert

Mine said "Pin down problems 90% faster, right down to the device".

When the problem is two homicidal sys admins sending you attack robots I imagine it doesn't take that long to narrow down the problem... here's a hint, it's the fire axe embedded in your desk :-p

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419ers take council for £100k

Captain Jack
Thumb Up

I was going to argue...

Until I saw the footnotes at the end of your post :-)

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Captain Jack
FAIL

Muppets

That is all...

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Moms stand firm against antenna madness

Captain Jack
FAIL

People with mobiles against Moms Merrick

How long before someone starts a campaign to get the masts put up because they can't get any signal?

Also I'd hate to be on the helpdesk for the phone providers having to explain that it's really not their fault that nobody can get a signal it's ludities on the line.

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Game-addicted man scores rare win over software lawyers

Captain Jack

McDonalds

You joke but someone sued McDonalds for making them fat

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Assange denies 'sexual assault' allegations

Captain Jack
Joke

Hope they don't get confused

That's all good until they get confused as to who's slandering who and we end with the story "FBI rapes Assange"

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Plane crash kills 'series of tubes' Senator Ted Stevens

Captain Jack
Stop

Why?

Seriously? In a totally unrelated article you felt you had to shoehorn in a joke about Apple?

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Vodafone upsets customers with upgrade downgrade

Captain Jack

Rabid Fans

Watch as anyone who even remotely likes the iPhone jumps on this chance to give droid owner a kicking.

I'm not saying it's undeserved as the iPhone has got quite a kicking over the last few weeks so they're probably looking for payback :-)

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Broadband advertising speed gap widens

Captain Jack

Might only be me

When I got my mum's house upgraded to 50Mb (through Virgin) most speed tests I did were actually getting that speed, I might be the exception that proves the rule though.

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Jobsian remote access app comes to Android

Captain Jack

Umm...

I could be wrong here but "Ignition" was originally built for the iPhone, the logmein client was built to allow easy remote access but the specific "Ignition" software was an app created for the iPhone to allow it to connect to the standard logmein desktop client.

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Lost iPhone 4G vendor loaner outed

Captain Jack

Opps...

My mistake I read "He reached for a phone and called a lot of Apple numbers and tried to find someone who was at least willing to transfer his call to the right person, but no luck. No one took him seriously and all he got for his troubles was a ticket number." as what he'd done instead of what Gizmondo said he'd done.

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Captain Jack

Years Ago

Years ago when the banks thought they we infallible my Grandad found he had an extra £1000 in his bank account (a lot at the time) being a good person he called the bank and told them they'd made an error on his account only to be told 'We don't make mistakes' so he kept the money and brought new furniture.

Seems Apple is in a similar situation, they fobbed off this guy when he called saying he'd found a new iPhone because they believed they were infallible and now it's comes back to bit them just like it did for the banks all those years ago.

As Bon Jovi said 'It's all the same, only the names will change'

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Castleford locals storm Tickle Cock bridge

Captain Jack
Joke

Umm...

I think you'll find they probably already do :-p

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