Posts by Fluffykins

If it's anything ike their handling of Phorm

It'll all be too complicated

But as it's a BMW

It'll still be driven by complete twunts

Oh - HERPA

I thought it was Herpes

@sandman

I'm not!

推擠您的頭入您的直腸並且打噴嚏

@Graham Marsden

Are you talking schist?

Just

W T flying F

False positives, popup advertising.

Time to move on.

@ eJ2095

"Speaking of that sodding cat I stuck down double sided tape on top of my case the cat never slept on it ever since (Cat had half its fur missing)"

You now owe me a (dust and cat hair free) keyboard. Earl Grey all over the old one.

When it turns out so-one is very interested

They'll start embedding the thing in the installers for all sorts of innocent sounding applications, with the "Don't install Yahoo Crap" tick box buried in fourteen pages of licence popups.

Just like the bloody Yahoo toolbar.

Hate parasiteware.

@ Nick Kew

Bastard. I was gonna say that.

I was going to expand a bit, tho and point out that TV transmission in the UK for all channels has been via transmitting stations owned and managed by Crown House, which is now owned by Arqiva, which was formed by National Grid Wireless (originally the UK subsidiary of Crown Castle) combining with Arqiva (formerly NTL Broadcast) in September 2008.

So, why the blazes don't we just get one aerial per area, rather than multiple aerials and muletple planning spats.

O2 have recently had their collective testicles kicked over erecting yet another an aerial near me, without proper consent. They have to get it down by Feb 2010.

News from Planet Livingstone

"the service in our operations around the globe is of very similar standards."

Ye Gods

On the basis of my direct contact with BT customer service, I take it that the "similar standards" include customer service agents with the intelligence and conversational ability of a thermos flask.

I did try once - quite hard - to talk to BT customer service.

It was about as inspiring as having a conversation with a piece of cheese.

The agent simply couldn't or wouldn't understand that I was calling on behalf of my elderly in-laws to ask why a product they'd didn't want and had not ordered had started to appear on their bills, get it removed and get a refund.

In the end I quite simply gave up tryiing to talk to the idiot, even after resorting to words of one syllable.

I wrote to BT customer service.

The in-laws told me the unwanted service eventually disappeared form their bill and that they received a healthy credit.

They never once actually got any other communication - even an apology.

I never, ever had any kind of reply or acknowledgement from BT at all.

Knobwits, to a man.

Puts a whole new meaning

to "HARD Gums"

and probably humbugs as well, if only I knew it

@ Paul Kinsler

"they could repackage their product as an application for users to install on their own computer, and which makes recommendations to that user. If it was useful, it might sell."

Would that be similar to things like the Yahoo Toolbar, say. The Yahoo Toolbar is just so darn good and wanted by so many prople that it has to be distributed as a half (or fully?) hidden parasite application to be loaded with genuine applications?

Hate Parasiteware.

I wonder

If a male weightlifter would use a jock strap, could she use a fan belt?

I can go one step further

How about "Pre-Eaten Egg?"

It's kinda brown, so I gave it the second name: "Chocolate Surprise"

Why? Well, I'd be surprised if it's chocolate.

See through specs! What next?

Drive-in carparks?

@Fifty Eight? - Anon Coward

Connecting wiv the younger generation - innit?

@ Simon Neill

Everyone: tap in a search for "Paris Hilton" - do it NOW!!!

By Google's definition, we'll all have had her

Not that good with stocks either

Or maybe it is.........

tried to find out what it knew about Phorm (ptah!) but it insisted that I was trying to find out about Pharm, even when I put in the stock code for Phorm (ptui!) PHRM.L

So definityly Fail(ure)

Or even Phail(ure)

H'mmm

The thing is: Will 'ee survive or won't 'ee?

This should be for registered subscribers only. It looks more like a "members only" story.

What do think the PI used for his case notes? A dicktaphone?

You Tube blocked by the UK?

Oh, yes, PLEASE!!!

Can I have an iPhone

And pay you for it when I damn' well feel like it?

Thought not.

Parasites

Two Options, not one, to make glowing puppies

Option 1:

Injected fluorescent genes (from an unspecified source)

Option 2:

Hot Curry

I for one

Welcome our new overlords, whatever their name

Does Kurt's attack on Mr Hanff make him..........

A Nappy Slapper?

You can have a Ford car, sir, of course.

But you can only use it on the A505, the A5 and the short bit of road that goes through Wigan, just before the bakery by the pie shop.

Yeah, as if.

I really hope

That the people canned include the fuckwit(s) responsible for punting Yahoo flavoured parasiteware (Toolbar, etc,. ) as all-but unavoidable add-ons to other applications.

And more idiot observations

"We can't be guilty of interception - it's too difficult to explain"

- BT

"Phorm/Webwise is a good thing"

-BT

"Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."

- Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949

"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."

- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943

"I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year."

- The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957

"But what ... is it good for?"

- Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip.

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."

- Ken Olson, president, chairman & founder of Digital Equipment Co, 1977

"This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us."

- Western Union internal memo, 1876.

"The telephone will be used to inform people that a telegram has been sent."

- Alexander Graham Bell.

"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"

- David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.

"The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C,' the idea must be feasible."

- A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.

"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"

- H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.

I for one

Welcome our snot-spraying overlords.

Rocket Pod?

FRIKKIN' LASER

@ Anonymous Coward, Re: oblig.

keyboard, please.

And coffee

And there's still hope it'll get a kicking over Phorm

That's all

Can someone please explain

What's the point of sending me adverts about what I was interested in yesterday?

I saw it and, if I needed it, I bought it: I am no longer interested.

Tell me about what I'll be interested in tomorrow and I may think that's useful.

@Tim

"velocity of a sheep in a vacuum"

Sir - we salute you!

Buggrit

Millenniumn hand and foot

At last

An article about BT which doesn't mention PHORM!

Oh,bugger

A good first stop might be

Phorm and BT - stop the buggers pilfering my IP for profit, thank you very much.

Ha ha rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh

Roger the cabin boy?

C'est le BOFH

KZZZZZZZZRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTT is the same in any language.

BMW Driver

'nuff said

Wouldn't it be nice

If Microsoft could design a crowser that simply conformed to the standards of the thing it is trying to serve?

I bet MS would bitch if I bought a product or service and paid for it with something nearly, but not quite, money.

e-pistles!

Dear God

Can I please have a new keyboard and a fresh cup of coffee.

Love

Fluffykins.

@DR

I can definitely detect a void in my smaller passages. It's nearly dinnertime.

Sounds like a great reason

to have a Palm Pre