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* Posts by Anonymous South African Coward

1764 posts • joined 6 Jan 2010

Can't get pranked by your team if nobody in the world can log on

Anonymous South African Coward
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ctrl+alt+left/right/up/down arrow rotated the screen.

Do that then walk away. User comes and goes all ????

But it is a major PITA on dual-screen setups as the display on both monitors will be rotated, but only the main screen will be rotated back.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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In the days of Win95 and Teardrop, I teardropped one technician's Win95 PC. He was supposed to work on computers, not waste time by surfing the Internet.

Its hard drive then chose that moment to die when he rebooted.

Happiness :) He was nost unhappy, but could prove nothing. Muhuhahaha.

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Happy 60th birthday, video games. Thank William Higinbotham for your misspent evenings

Anonymous South African Coward
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Ahhhh... Atari 2600 had a tennis/pong clone in its Video Olympics games cassette.

Hours of fun.

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GitHub.com freezes up as techies race to fix dead data storage gear

Anonymous South African Coward
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Ah, the wild and wonderful world of the cloud

people tend to forget that cloudy services still is connected to the wibbly wobbly web

if it wobbles, off your data goes

same with the cloud, if it wobbles, off your data goes as well.

Recovery in the first instance depends on the level of damage (power failure, vacuum cleaner, lightning strike, BOFH act, backhoe digging into a crucial backbone) - no data will be lost except downtime for which the company have to pay in lost hours if it does not have a redundant internet link in place... (the BOFH act may range from a simple upload of the wrong firmware to the router, to an epoxy-resin welded circuit breaker, to a rm -rf * on the Boss's terminal)...

Recovery in the second instance depends on the cloudy provider's IT crew (and hardware should it be required)... and yes, data may be lost, depending on the severity.

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Haunted disk-drive? This story will give you the chills...

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Smoker's Condensation on the heads...

Skid marks in the loo...

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Yale Security Fail: 'Unexpected load' caused systems to crash, whacked our Smart Living Home app

Anonymous South African Coward
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Isn't Android 4.x now EOL? Why even try and code apps for that generation of droids? If the (l)user really want IoT Yale keys, then surely said (l)user will be happy to shell out £££ (or $$$) for a new Android device running 6.x (or higher) as part of the requirements.

Three words : lowest common denominator.

If, by using an old Android version they unwittingly causes grief for themselves, then it's their own fault for doing so.

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Alphabet in the soup for keeping quiet about Google+ data leak bug

Anonymous South African Coward
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And, in other news, all 4 of G+'s users is starting a petition to stop Google from killing off G+

G+ moderators complain that their reports regarding spammers and spam goes unheeded, and spammers is havening a field day in the death throes of G+

Will be interesting going forward. Will investors also take Google to task for dropping G+?

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Mobe networks battle to bring comms back after Hurricane Michael smashes US Gulf Coast

Anonymous South African Coward
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why not stick the fibre underground?

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Scanning an Exchange server for a virus that spreads via email? What could go wrong?

Anonymous South African Coward
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Remote Desktop in the ILOVEYOU virus era?

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In Windows 10 Update land, nobody can hear you scream

Anonymous South African Coward
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Lovely.

So all you need is a couple dozen borked Ickdoze boxen/laptops and screaming lusers to make your week more hellish.

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Samsung: Swanky hardware alone won't save a phone maker

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Fuck everything

Five lenses, eh,? Twoflower will be very interested.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Can confirm re bloatware.

On my three Huawei devices (one work, two private) I absolutely had no bloatware or unwanted apps (like zuckerbook etc). And a Xiaomi Redmi 4A. Sheer bliss, to use MY device with the apps I HAVE SELECTED. After all, I paid for it and it is MINE.

Prior to my first Huawei device I had a Sagsmug S3 mini. It was loaded with bloatware which I did not want, and sometimes (frequently too, to add insult to injury) some crap app would go berzerk and drain the battery flat in record time. I totally swore Sagsmug off then.

Or else Sagsmug can lease out phones with crap bloatware installed for maximum slurpage (and so delight the Zuckerborg) and they can control it since it is theirs. (Oops, did I gave somebody a Very Bad Idea?)

Wife's phone (a Sagsmug Neo) is on its way out, but I will be getting a new phone for her, and this time it will NOT be a Sagsmug, she complained about not being able to uninstall the faceboob app (for starters).

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Take my advice: The only safe ID is a fake ID

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: I love your internetpage! Can I register?

C.Y.B.E.R.T.R.ASH III?

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Casino Royale

"Hello Mr Bond. My name is Dick Gleeballs and this is Pussy Galore. Our evil overlord have decided that you most certainly need to visit a certain Mr Johnny Aws".

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Dick Gleeballs?

Now that is a name... :)

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Yale Weds: Just some system maintenance, nothing to worry about. Yale Thurs: Nobody's smart alarm app works

Anonymous South African Coward
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Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Another score for flaky IoT stuff.

I may be old-fashioned, but I prefer a mechanical lock (or two) and a couple of four-legged friends instead of an electronical thing...

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Microsoft Windows 10 October update giving HP users BSOD

Anonymous South African Coward
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Going to revert back to Ickdoze 8.1 - let others be havening fun with Ickdoze 10, I've had enough.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Got WSUS to act as shield between unwanted ickdoze updates and company's PC's.

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Powerful forces, bodily fluids – it's all in a day's work

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Just the Usual...

Lady knocked over cup of coffee on her HP laptop.

When I got it, it was dripping wet. I immediately removed the battery and rinsed it thoroughly with cold water from a tap.

Then let it sit in the sun for the rest of the day to dry out.

The next day it started up just fine, there was a small discolorated area on the monitor, but otherwise it was fine.

That was two months ago. It still is running.

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With sorry Soyuz stuffed, who's going to run NASA's space station taxi service now?

Anonymous South African Coward
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will a helium balloon work with a remote-controlled payload/drone (thruster/rocket-powered) attached to it?

Once it is on the fringes of SPAAAAAAAACE and the balloon pops, manoeuver said drone via remote control towards the ISS...

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I find your lack of faith disturbing, IBM: Big Blue fires photon torpedo at Pentagon JEDI cloud contract

Anonymous South African Coward
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Muad'Dib is making plans for an invasion.

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Russian 'troll factory' firebombed – but still fit to fiddle with our minds

Anonymous South African Coward
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You cannot troll a troll.

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Pentagon's JEDI mind tricks at odds with our 'values' says Google: Ad giant evaporates from $10bn cloud contract bid

Anonymous South African Coward
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Joke

"A spokesperson told Bloomberg:

Shouldn't it be rather "spokesdrone"?

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Anonymous South African Coward
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First casualty then.

Who will fall/fold second?

But, who will be the ultimate winner?

I'll go out on a limb and predict that said winner will be fat, bloated and lazy close (or after) the 2-year mark.

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Google now minus Google Plus: Social mini-network faces axe in data leak bug drama

Anonymous South African Coward
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Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul,

Ash nazg thrakatulûk agh burzum-ishi krimpatul.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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I'm part of three G+ communities :

IT professionals

Retro computing

IT security

The knowledge you can find in those communities is most excellent, and something you will not find on faecebook.

Most members of those communities are most upset, and we're deciding where to go from here.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Meh

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On the third day of Windows Microsoft gave to me: A file-munching run of DELTREE

Anonymous South African Coward
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On day 4 Microsoft gave me a rolled back update....

What will day 5 bring then? (Moanday)

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Indeed. Doing a CHKDSK /F on DOS produced a couple of crosslinked files (if you're unlucky enough) which you can salvage, but it will not delete stuff.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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What will day 4 give us? Much more joy? And hopefully a good expletive-laden rant from Bombastic Bob... :)

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Will WSUS stop Bloat10 from upgrading itself?

Time to make a slight adjustment to our backup policies then.

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Convenient switch hides an inconvenient truth

Anonymous South African Coward
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So... was some Halon released?

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30 years ago, NASA put Challenger behind it and sent a Space Shuttle back out into the black

Anonymous South African Coward
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I salute the men and women who risked their lives - and who is an inspiration to us all.

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Brit mobe operator O2 asks cut-off customers: Have you tried turning it on and off again?

Anonymous South African Coward
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Merger from hell - TSB and O2 :p

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China's going to make a mobile OS and everyone will love it, predict ball-gazing analysts

Anonymous South African Coward
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But you'll be relieved to hear that "smart clothing remains a highly niche product category serving specific segments such as professional sports". Nobody wants to talk to their trousers.

Dabbsy, here's one for you :)

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Microsoft: OK, we have no phones, but look how much we love Android

Anonymous South African Coward
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Meh, not working on my phone. I can connect and everything, but when I open the icons to do... work... nothing happens.

I have a Xiaomi Redmi 4A.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Pint

Thanks for mentioning AirDroid. Will download and try it out.

Thanks!

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Windows 10 1809: Now arriving on a desktop near you (if you want it)

Anonymous South African Coward
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Will wait a bit until it get the all-clear from world+dog.

Also explains why my WSUS server is churning like crazy. Meh.

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Free for every Reg reader – and everyone else, too: Arm Cortex-M CPUs for Xilinx FPGAs

Anonymous South African Coward
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Excuse my ignorance, but what can this be used for in the real world?

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Rookie almost wipes customer's entire inventory – unbeknownst to sysadmin

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: New contractor

"P45" is the UK government standard form used when one is invited to seek alternate employment.

Ahh, a "pink slip" then.

Thanks for letting me (and others) know :)

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: New contractor

....resulting in a nice shiny new P45.

I have to assume that a P45 is a civil court case?

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Reminds me of the classic

https://www.ee.ryerson.ca/~elf/hack/recovery.html

Was about to post the same. It is a legendary classic by now.

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Why are sat-nav walking directions always so hopeless?

Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Too many apps

If lost in a forest go always down. You will reach a stream or gully and leave the forest along it. Going up will inevitably end on a hilltop.

Baaaaah. Tell that to the sadistic programmers of any Adventure text game featuring forests.

Gah.

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Anonymous South African Coward
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Re: Frogger

Ribbit!

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Anonymous South African Coward
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In the old days when visiting clients, you'd consult a paper map, make mental notes where to go, and you'll arrive safe and sound at your client/destination. This also have the advantage of you "optimizing" your route especially if you knew which shady parts of the city/country to avoid.

Nowadays you just plonk your destination into your GPS, and if you land up in the middle of a squatter camp late at night.... (Happened to me once).

I prefer the old way of doing it, by mentally plotting and remembering your route, gives them brain cells a good workout.

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Facebook: Up to 90 million addicts' accounts slurped by hackers, no thanks to crappy code

Anonymous South African Coward
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Patch one bug and create a couple of other fun bugs in the process.

Evil laughter. Muhuhahaha.

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Microsoft gets ready to kill Skype Classic once again: 'This time we mean it'

Anonymous South African Coward
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Skype in violation of GDPR? Eh?

I stopped using it when they pushed that newfangled UI crap out.

It'll go the same route as WinPhone, Mxit, and so on.

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Perfect timing for a two-bank TITSUP: Totally Inexcusable They've Stuffed Up Payday

Anonymous South African Coward
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Nice way to start off payday....

...NOT.

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Pain spotting: Russia's Aeroflot Docker server lands internal source code, config files on public internet

Anonymous South African Coward
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Coat

If you try to hack Aeroflot's website, you'll get a prize.

One-way ticket to the Gulag.

Leaving for a safe house at an undisclosed location post-haste.

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