* Posts by VinceH

3483 publicly visible posts • joined 26 Nov 2009

Another investor pulls out of Habbo Hotel after grooming claims

VinceH
Joke

Re: Just a thought

"if these investors are selling due to moral outrage, who do they expect to buy the stake?"

Paedophiles.

And, possibly, terrorists.

Tim Cook reveals 'great' update for Mac Pro

VinceH
Trollface

'"Our Pro customers like you are really important to us. Although we didn't have a chance to talk about a new Mac Pro at [this week's] event, don't worry as we're working on something really great for later next year," he wrote.'

After which, he immediately picked up the phone and rang the Mac Pro team. "Start working on an update that we can call 'really great' when we announce it next year..."

Microsoft develops mood-matching ad engine

VinceH
Big Brother

" The platform works across devices, tracking and monitoring the online activity data of consumers stored in logs including browsing history, web page content, search queries, emails, instant messages, videos from webcams, gestures from a computing device, e.g., Microsoft Kinect and results from online games."

So on the one hand we have the so-called eu cookie law, which is a pile of crap but at least the idea is to protect privacy from tracking on the web, and on the other hand we have Microsoft who want to take tracking to a whole new and far more sinister level.

World+dog discovers hi-res aerial maps, thanks to Google and Apple

VinceH

Re: Daily Mail

What?

Nooooooooooooo!

Say it isn't so!

Raspberry Pi safe and warm in TINY Lego fortress

VinceH

Re: Plastic - ack!

Guess: There are missing words, such as "when it arrives".

Facebook tears wraps off its own app store

VinceH
Joke

Yes, but each of those four words is one word.

Last.fm tell users to change passwords IMMEDIATELY

VinceH

Re: You know how I know they have iPhone apps?

Unless, of course, there's someone else out there who happens to use the iPhone app, and just happens to have the very same password as me - which doesn't seem likely to me.

VinceH

Re: You know how I know they have iPhone apps?

Yes.

VinceH

Re: You know how I know they have iPhone apps?

Self correction: you didn't say, as I quoted, "those sites" but your wording still reads to me as though that"s what you meant.

VinceH
FAIL

Re: You know how I know they have iPhone apps?

"Those sites" - so presumably you're including LinkedIn in your claim.

In which case, the icon you chose is incorrect; Sherlock wears a deerstalker, not a tinfoil hat.

(I have never accessed LinkedIn on my phone, let alone on a brand of phone I will not own)

Twitter bird reborn to the sound of whalesong

VinceH

Re: How many circles?

To be fair, the quote is actually "three sets of overlapping circles" rather than "three overlapping circles". What defines a set in this case, and how many circles is in one, is anyone's guess. (Mine is that by "three sets..." he really meant there were three different sizes used. It looks to me as though a number of circles at three different sizes could be used to create the logo.

LinkedIn users buried in spam after database leak

VinceH

Re: Idiots

According to that page, my password was on the list. "Was" because I changed it as soon as I read about the problem - I haven't seen any emails from LinkedIn, though. (I suppose it's possible they're only sending the email to those who's passwords are unchanged but, somehow, that seems unlikely.)

How to put "Stuxnet author" on your CV

VinceH
Black Helicopters

"So, you say you developed software while working there. Would you like to provide a little more information? What sort of software did you write?"

"I could tell you that, but then I'd have to kill you."

Apple seeks resurrection of HTC importation ban

VinceH

There's a part of me that wants to turn to Twitter and say something like:

"Crap! Apple are trying to get the competition banned yet again. They've a week to get their shit together or I'm blowing Cupertino sky high!"

Problem is, either some damned fool will take it seriously and I'll be facing extradition to Overpuddle, or, if that fails, Apple's lawyers will contact Paul Chambers and offer to sue me on his behalf for copyright infringement or something.

Earth bathed in high-energy radiation from colossal mystery blast

VinceH

We were being scanned by a race of alien patent lawyers, to see if we had anything they could sue us for.

Microsoft and Nokia dub Google troll moan 'desperate', 'frivolous'

VinceH

Re: Spreading the shit

"in fact the motorola action is arguably all about defending against patent abuse"

There. Fixed it for you.

Firm applies for .sucks domain

VinceH

Re: Why not just...

And not forgetting dotsucksdotcom.sucks.com? Just for completeness.p

VinceH
Facepalm

"that would forbid registrants for, for example, setting up a porn site on disney.sucks."

But what about <insert porn star name>.sucks ?

Dish Networks locks horns with broadcasters over ad skipping

VinceH
Trollface

Well, according to the first sentence of this article, which says "Apple’s iCloud service crashed for ninety minutes on Monday, US time" it seems that Overpuddlian time may indeed differ from hours - though how by much isn't made clear.

Perhaps you've worked it out. :)

Roman roads get the web maps treatment

VinceH

I welcome our new Roman ove... oh wait, that already happened, didn't it?

Britain has 10 million twits, tweets Twitter

VinceH
Joke

Re: 10,000 000

" +1 "

So that's ten million and one, then. :p

Watchdog bites bar over 'offensive' Facebook ad

VinceH

Re: Sir

I think it's FF Enzo Black

In my defence for being such a sad git that I looked it up, I was hoping I could legitimately identify the font and then suitably pun its real name. I was wrong.

75,000 Raspberry Pi baked before August

VinceH
Thumb Up

Re: Prince

Not until now, no - but now you've put the connection in my head!

"She wore a raspberry pi-i, and if it was warm, she wouldn't wear much more..."

I demand a PlayMobil mock up of what that might look like as an advertising campaign! ;)

West Midlands plods get mobile fingerprint tech

VinceH

iCloud blows away 15 million users for 90 minutes

VinceH
Joke

" Apple’s iCloud service crashed for ninety minutes on Monday, US time "

Do they have different length minutes in Overpuddle now, as well, then? :p

Yahoo! CEO! didn't! even! read! his! own! CV!

VinceH

Re: Totally Honest

You get paid?

VinceH

Re: As we used to say to suspected porkies when I were a lad.

"Itchy chin" hereabouts.

Study reveals high price of porn addiction

VinceH
Joke

Sometimes scientists have personal axes to grind

I think you might have just invented a new euphemism.

Best and the Rest: ARM Mini PCs

VinceH

Re: RISC OS wasn't first

I'm not aware of a RISC OS 1, and the first version of RISC OS released was RISC OS 2 - not too long after the Archimedes was brought out with Arthur.

I've always assumed, therefore, that (although it's never been said anywhere, AFAIK) Arthur was, in effect, RISC OS 1, but just wasn't called that at the time.

And having said that, even if my assumption was correct, it still might not have been the first: Wasn't there a ARM processor for the BBC using the tube interface? If so, what ran on that? (Or was it just an internal thing, when they were developing the ARM?)

NASA spots the light of a ‘super-Earth’

VinceH
Joke

See the term "super heated junk" in my head... ;)

ARM creators Sophie Wilson and Steve Furber

VinceH

You could always use the "Rate this article ..." gadget underneath the link for the comments.

(Disclaimer: The only time I ever do that is by accident, when reading on my tablet.)

NHS trust goes 100% over IT budget in patient records rollout cockup

VinceH
WTF?

The Lost City of Holby (Head for Atlantis, but turn right at the traffic lights).

I'm confused about where Holby City even is.

Casualty used to be filmed in Bristol, but set in the fictional Holby. As a result, Holby just happened to share a number of landmarks with Bristol, even having its very own Clifton Suspension Bridge. (My, Brunel was busy that week!). Now it's moved to Cardiff, and suddenly all of Holby's familiar landmarks have vanished, to be replaced by others.

Holby City, on the other hand, as far as I know isn't even filmed in Bristol to start with, except exterior shots, which are - or were. If they're still using Bristol, are the two shows not somewhat inconsistent now?

Why embossed credit cards are here to stay

VinceH

Re: A minor irritation with the numbers

I couldn't agree more.

What's worse is a combination of inconsistency and lack of labelling.

If the site doesn't say "Keep your filthy spaces off me, you damned dirty serf" I instinctively enter the spaces. And if I'm able to enter the full number with spaces (ie the field isn't limited to 16 characters), I'll carry on... and only find out they didn't want them when the transaction fails.

Because programming the system to automatically remove them is such a difficult task.

Or maybe some twat's gone and patented doing that, so everyone else has stopped doing it.

ARM creators Sophie Wilson and Steve Furber

VinceH
Pint

Re: Your phone, your tablet ...

> ... My PC.

Two on my desk. One sitting in a little box behind me somewhere. A few in the loft.

comp ended

VinceH
Facepalm

big beats

Am I the only one who did a double take at that, initially reading it as 'big breasts'?

New fake anti-virus shakes down frightened file-sharers

VinceH

Re: " ... the use of Dropbox as a delivery mechanism ..."

I wondered that. Perhaps it specifically looks for shated drop box folders and attaches itself to stuff in there?

VinceH

Re: Hmm

" As usual, this type of scam best benefits small indy computer repair shops and IT savvy friends who can get a decent income in removing these types of malware."

In the case of my friends (and family) that IT savvy guy is me - except there's no decent income from doing it, becauseI don't usually charge them.

However, I have decided to change that - if they have to pay for my time then maybe, just maybe, they'll learn to be more careful in future.

One exception: I was offered payment once: an ex colleage rang me when his laprop had an infection. He said he was near my place, and could drop it in to fix it, and said he'd give me a tenner for my time, describing it as 'a nice cash in the hand job' - what a crying shame I was out, then, because I'm always looking to undervalue my time by such a ridiculous amount (not charging at all notwithstanding)

DoJ could start Apple ebook price-fixing lawsuit this week

VinceH

Re: Observations

Aren't those comments hostile to publishers (and Apple) rather than authors?

'As seen on TV' claims can't be made about unbranded props

VinceH

Re: "As seen on the Internet!"

You're right - me!

When I exhibit my wares in person, I like to have a little joke or two in the flyers etc, and I think that will fit the bill nicely for a new one. Using it on the web might be fun as well.

Mega-star HD 10180 could have more planets than the Sun

VinceH
Alien

Re: Bode's law is really the result of gravity and time

Way back in the mists of time <cue strange swirly effect> I used Bode's Law for the coursework in a maths GCSE I took (for fun - already had an o level). I aimed to prove it by applying it to Jupiter's moons. There were a few anomalies (just as in the solar system itself), but it broadly fit.

(I think I then took the coursework in the direction of using Bode's Law to fill in some of the numbers in the Drake equation...)

I ought to try searching for the original document. I must have it still, somewhere.

Facebook's facial recog bots can't eat your face without your say-so

VinceH
Joke

Re: Anonymous

Wow, that's an almost spooky coincidence, because for me it's: my friend always looks the same.

Five charged after fanboi sells kidney for iPad and iPhone

VinceH
Facepalm

Re: I don't get it

" I'm always puzzled when people come out with this sort of thing. What exactly has Jessica Alba got that thousands of other women don't have?"

Nothing. He was probably just naming an attractive woman that a large umber of readers would recognise to illustrate the humourously intended point that bagging a gorgeous, but out of reach woman should be a higher priority to a teenage boy than getting a couple of shiny new toys. That if you're going to put your life at risk, there are better things to aim for as a reward.

Personally, I'd rather keep my organs - I'm rather attached to them. Badumtish!

Lords give automatic smut censorship bill the once-over

VinceH
Joke

Re: So hows this going to work then?

" The number of porn sites on the internet is one of the closes approximations to infinity known to mathematics. Their rate of expansion is also astronomical."

"Yes, I'd like to register as over 18, please, so I can access pornographic websites. I'm an astronomer, you see, and I'm attempting to make a comparative study of the number of stars with the number of pornographic websites, as well as the rate of growth in terms of that number and the size of the Universe..."

Arizona bill makes it illegal to 'annoy or offend' online

VinceH

Re: Yeah, I know...

" Seriously, does no one remember that old chestnut about stick and stones, or am I just showing my age?"

Do you mean the one that goes, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can cut much deeper," by any chance? :p

VinceH
Facepalm

Re: Loophole

" If you can mangle the spelling and grammar as well, that adds reasonable doubt over what you actually said, or meant. Some might argue that a large proportion of internet users have been doing this for years."

And there was me thinking the vast majority of internet users were just thick. The reality is that they're all clever bastards who saw this coming, and it was me being thick all along.

Dr Who scores new companion from Emmerdale

VinceH

Re: Who's better, Who's best

You appear to have made a typo. Clearly V1 should read V2.

LOHAN's fantastical flying truss menaces kiddies

VinceH
Thumb Up

Re: The village idiot - I think I might know him. And him. And him.

"One, if it's big enough."

Ha, yeah, I like that. I'll give it as an answer if I'm ever asked that again. :)

VinceH
Facepalm

The village idiot - I think I might know him. And him. And him.

> After an hour of banal gibbering, he said: "What's your favourite car?"

> I replied: "I don't like cars."

> Undeterred, he insisted: "Yes, but if you did like cars, what would be your favourite?"

This does remind me of the sort of question I get from time to time, when asking about something where the answer depends on oh so many different factors. Probably the worst one was when I upgraded someone's hard drive, and they asked how many files the new drive would hold. Answer: "It depends what you put on it." Response: "But you're an expert, you must have some idea."

New iPad sales hit 3 million in first 4 days

VinceH
Trollface

Re: Correction

"Where's the iPad killer?"

I have a good, solid sledge hammer here, if you have an iPad that needs to be killed.

I'll even waive my usual fee.

Apple wants ebook price class action suit thrown out

VinceH
FAIL

Re: The big problem is the "can't be cheaper elsewhere" clause

Yes, most of those titles are cheaper on Apple's store, but that's the point - the allegation is that Apple are mandating the same book* can't be cheaper elsewhere, not that it can't be more expensive elsewhere.

* I'd guess that means the same edition, which might (or might not) explain the one that's cheaper on Amazon in your list. Or there might be another explanation.