* Posts by hplasm

5611 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Google, Amazon, Starbucks are 'immoral' and 'ridiculous' over UK tax

hplasm
Devil

Re: Welcome to the capitalist world...

"We all love good value for money"

That rules out Starbucks, then.

hplasm
Devil

Lawyers and accountants will be going bankrupt by the million.

You say that like it is a bad thing...

Windows boss Steve Sinofsky exits Microsoft

hplasm
Happy

Re: 8almer

Nice one.

iFixit CEO launches open Toshiba service guide scheme

hplasm
Unhappy

Toshiba-

Hiding behind H&S?

It's spreading worldwide like a red weed...

UK's planned copyright landgrab will spark US litigation 'firestorm'

hplasm
Devil

How about

Royalites for Dickens novels ripped off by the US?

EU approves push to get the unknown security in ARM chips into use

hplasm
Devil

Re:should've made your calculation in Excel

or not, rather.

'Perfect' INVISIBLE SHED stuns boffinry world

hplasm
Happy

Re: Better make the shed rock-shaped, too.

Unfortunately the chameleon circuit is bust.

Coders grill Herb Sutter on future of C++ at Microsoft

hplasm
Meh

Hello?

"...World..."?

Doubt it.

Star Wars VII: The Disney Movie signs Toy Story III script genius

hplasm
Happy

Re: Star Wars VII: Rise of the Gungans!

Gungan Style ?

Goatse.cx opens up again - as an email provider

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: I like the idea but...

Perhaps anyone who needs an addy for '"we will not pass on your details ..." signups. Why not for $5? Better than a spam raddled Hotmail account- if you can still get one...

Microsoft Surface Touch keyboards self-destruct – and more

hplasm
Happy

Re: But....

The Surface clicky-clicky one with the Glee types?

hplasm
Happy

Re: Why do you enjoy seeing other people have problems?

He's a designer at MS?

Microsoft to biz: Just so you get off XP, we don't mind if you go Win 7

hplasm
Devil

Windows To Go

What a nice headline that would make...

Apple-v-Samsung $1bn iPhone fine: 'Jury foreman was biased'

hplasm
Devil

Re: Since one US Jury was drunk or stoned through most of a case

As well as the Apple/Samsung one?

Outrageous!

At last, a bionic arm that passes the Beer, Egg and Looks Cool tests

hplasm
Happy

Re: This is what science and technology should be doing.

using a 'mouse'.... right...

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: Good stuff.

'Flesh coloured' plastic never is, looks creepy and scares kids.

Robot stuff, shiny or CF looks cool and not scary. Unless you are Sarah Connor, of course.

hplasm
Gimp

Re: We've got a robot hand grasping a mans penis here!

Code word...or safe word?

Habitable HEAVY GRAVITY WORLD found just 42 light-years away

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: I don't need more gravity.

That's what we need! Artificial Levity!

wizz! (For Atomms)

Apple is granted a patent on the rectangle. No, really

hplasm
Boffin

Re: Why...

I shall invent a device to accelerate and collide lawyers and priests at relativistic speeds, and place it in the public domain.

I wonder what esoteric particles would be produced?

Suggestions on a postcard:-

hplasm
Happy

Re: a cat has had a go at the rectangle with its claws.

On an iPhone 5, yes- they look like that out of the factory, apparently.

Japanese car nuts build racecars powered by shouting 'Brrrm! Brrrrrm!'

hplasm
Headmaster

Re: Braking wind

Probably applied with a 'peddle'...

grr!

Apple seeks cooling fan patent for iPhone, iPad

hplasm
Happy

I shall-

patent the use of audio-output jack as a whistle.

*heard it here first*

Medical scan record that the NHS says will cost £2k to retrieve: Detail

hplasm
FAIL

"He's just looking for attention."

Said jm83, in a string of postings...

What made us human? Being armed with lethal ranged weapons

hplasm
Go

Re: "powerful, lethal ranged weapons is a vital part of what makes us human"

...what *keeps* us human is compassion and empathy.

Apple iPad 4 Wi-Fi only tablet review

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: I just got one for work

Now *that* is a Review.

Take note.

Microsoft offers cut-price Win 8 PCs and fondletops to UK schools

hplasm
Windows

Shape the future

“Give me the child for his first seven years and I'll give you the Microsoft User.”

Same Old.

Microsoft mulls 'Xbox Surface' slate for games

hplasm
Meh

Surface to Games Slate?

Remove keyboard.

How hard can it be?

Apple iPad Mini 8in tablet review

hplasm
Gimp

Re: Sheltered Life

Don't sit under the Apple tree, with anyone else but i...

Sing along now!

Apple's poisonous Touch silently kills the GNOMEs of Linux Forest

hplasm
Happy

Re: XFCE

ok, just "ooo" then...

Post-pub nosh deathmatch: Souse versus scrapple

hplasm
Devil

Re: I'm proud of my kids as well

Social Services?

*Put them in the curry*

/Milligan Dalek Voice

hplasm
Devil

Re: cultural preferences

Always interesting are people who like things until they find out what they are- then they go off them.

Freud would have a field day...

hplasm
Meh

Re: Yukk

Nah- cat food needs salt- which is really not! good for cats; otherwise...

Felix Baumgartner sadly turns out to be blinkered FOOL

hplasm
Trollface

Re: Usual whining drivel from the Reg's resident Victor Meldrew

Perhaps you shoud leave off the Red Bull.

And stop reading stories you know will make you rant.

Nobody knows what to call Microsoft's ex-Metro UI

hplasm
Windows

Re: Acro-monious

NUTS

Nobody Uses This Shit.

hplasm
Devil

or

Ftumch!

hplasm
Happy

Re: 20 Billion for this?

I agree- call it WTF?

That's what most people will say when they start to use it.

El Reg acquires wildly dangerous laser cannon (with lightsabre option)

hplasm
Unhappy

'a consumer'

Is that how you see yourself?

hplasm
Stop

Re: Is that really a good idea?.

You'd better be wearing hi-vis and carrying a clip board when you say that...

Asus: we ship a million Google's Nexus 7s monthly

hplasm
Gimp

Re: There is a lot more value to the iPad than just the price.

No. No there isn't.

The retina display is wasted on the blinkered and the blind.

Forgetting Microsoft: How Steve Ballmer's Surface could win

hplasm
Meh

Re: I'm buying a surface.

It must be better than being a dimensionless entity, I suppose...

hplasm
Happy

Re: "Nun on nun action"

Penguin Wrestling.

hplasm
Meh

Re: We are not the product-

Demographics are worth nothing except to demographics companies that sell them :)

Stupid consumers are where the money lies.

hplasm
Holmes

We are not the product-

We are the target.

You can ignore an advert (GOOG )- you can't ignore an invoice. (MS)

Sandy takes out NYC colo facility

hplasm
Coat

Re: A bit unlucky

A server centre without ports? At least it's secure...

Volunteers sought to see if anyone actually can hear you scream in space

hplasm
Devil

Er-

How many cell towers will this phone confuse?

hplasm
Facepalm

WTF?

here's another experiment-

Give me a £20 note, and see if I can make it disappear.

Look! It's gone.

Let's see if I can do it again- give me another twenty...

heh heh heh

WinPho 8 fans now able to order HTC handsets

hplasm
Unhappy

Re: Weird, isn't it.....

So looking like a nerk is the new cool? Who knew?

Timmy Mallet for fashion icon

Hitachi buys Horizon to save UK's nuclear future

hplasm
Holmes

Re: Lord Brunel Resurrection!

A Steampunk Revolution?

hplasm
Thumb Up

Finally!

A step forwards. Everything seems to have been going backwards recently into darkness and gloom, lit only by the optimistic glow of LCD backlights.

Microsoft Surface popped open, poked, prodded

hplasm
Linux

Re: betting on linux to rule the worlld

Whilst you were pissing about with MS, it did.