* Posts by hplasm

5611 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Linux in 2013: 'Freakishly awesome' – and who needs a fork?

hplasm
Windows

Re: And yet, and yet ...

"...nothing but a clapped out Ford Anglia..."

The thread is not about Windows.

Google tells Microsoft IE shops: We can help you with those 'legacy apps'

hplasm
Meh

"First do no harm"

I think that is doctors, rather than GOOG...

Hardware hacker unifies 15 retro consoles in format frenzy

hplasm
Thumb Up

Very good!

Hardware good... too many emulators these days.

Sophos picks up axe again, 'plans to DECIMATE staff'

hplasm
Devil

Re: Industry ??

Banks don't exist?

Boffins: Tireless star spurted deadly jets for half an hour at a time

hplasm
Happy

"...a newly formed black hole in the heart of the star"

I suppose 7 billion years ago is 'newly', in the scheme of things...

Gov.uk named THE BEST THING Britain has made all year

hplasm
Facepalm

Hark!

Whalesong!

Man the harpoons- 'tis a Brown-nose, by God!

Angry Birds fire back: Vulture cousins menace UK city's mobiles

hplasm
Coat

Re: Cow

Vodaphone replied: "Er, don't have a CoW, man."

TalkTalk ads banned by watchdog over 'misleading' YouView offer

hplasm
Unhappy

Re: like they say though...

In this case, though, there is no mechanic, no hammer and no hitting required.

Eerie satnav boffinry claims it can predict THE FUTURE

hplasm
Mushroom

This could be useful-

Considering how many Audi drivers do drive with their heads up their arses.

Internet Explorer makes modest gains against Google Chrome

hplasm
Big Brother

Re: Meanwhile in the DPRK...

Kim Jong-Un uses drugs...

Distilled from the tears of the NK people...

Will Google's rivals swallow the 'labelling remedy' pill?

hplasm
FAIL

Great.

Harrison Bergeron comes to the internet.

Wales slams Amazon over lack of Kindle support

hplasm
Meh

Re: The welsh lobby

A BBC programme that wasn't London-centric. That must have been a shock, alright.

LOHAN chap to launch Raspberry Pi eye in the sky

hplasm
Thumb Up

Pi. High.

Touch the sky!

Microsoft Xbox exec quits after ENRAGING the INTERWEBS

hplasm
FAIL

Re: Holier than thou wankers

Shutit, Orth.

Foot-long slab too big? Microsoft 'has a 7-incher' to stroke

hplasm
Meh

New ads!

Higher pitched clicking!

Dancing midgets!

Now with extra WTF!

Hard luck lads, todger size DOES matter: Official

hplasm
Happy

Re: Also

That's not very wide!

Microsoft follows Apple into the dock over warranty terms in China

hplasm
Meh

I would lay odds-

That there will be very few Surfaces about in two years, alive or dead.

Climate change set to bumpify transatlantic flights, say researchers

hplasm
Meh

Re: Excuse me, I need to paper the shelves in my kitchen cabinets.

The Sun's output has nothing to do with climate- the IPCC said so!

Microsoft leads charge against Google's Android in EU antitrust complaint

hplasm
Windows

Ha!

Cheeky Bastards!

BT boss barks at TalkTalk for being 'copper Luddites'

hplasm
Boffin

Nearly

BT fibre to the cab, as do VM- the it's BT cooper to the house, and VM run 2x copper pairs for phone lines and co-ax for broadband/TV, all in one cable.

Windows XP support ends a year from … now!

hplasm
Happy

Re: "Windows XP dies a year from … now!"

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh XP T'urtle's wgah'nagl fhtagn

Website which 'could have prevented Rwandan genocide' goes live

hplasm
Big Brother

Re: Nonsense

Sounds like a job for... Zombie Thatcher.

Hold on! Degrees for all doesn't mean great jobs for all, say profs

hplasm
Happy

Re: How Victorian.

Close but only banana/2 for you...

Those who can, do.

Those who can learn to pass tests, teach.

Those without clues become the rulers...

Microsoft: 'Facebook Home just copies Windows Phone'

hplasm
Windows

is it a fan? is it a boy?

Sadly, both.

Android's US market share continues to slip

hplasm
Happy

Re: The real success story ...

Nokia are pining for the fjords!

Microsoft's developer conference sells out at $2,095 per head

hplasm
Happy

Re: If You Don't Like The Surface...

And leave with a nasty infection.

Steve Jobs' 'spaceship' threatened by massive cost overruns

hplasm
Happy

Re: Honestly

Area=1 iDonut

Tech is the biggest problem facing archiving

hplasm
Headmaster

Re: No archive

"Is required to have..." is not the same as "need to have..."

Federal lawyers, MIT threatened following Aaron Swartz' death

hplasm
Happy

Re: And two rights don't make a wrong

Three rights do make a left, though.

Copyright troll Prenda refuses to explain legal strategy

hplasm
FAIL

Thanks for your input.

Back to work Dredd.

Microsoft's summer update will be called Windows 8.1

hplasm
Devil

Re: 8.1? but then what would they call 8.3?

I Can't Believe It's Still Crap!

How the iPad ruined the lives of IT architects

hplasm
Devil

A testing!

iPad vs Fryingpan.

iPad can have the first swing.

Let the games commence!

Rocket boffinry in pictures: Gulp the Devil's venom and light a match

hplasm
Big Brother

Re: I aim for the stars

More likely that UK politicians are denser than a dwarf star and more myopic than cave fish.

And greedy- don't forget. Short term wins over long term every time.

Bastards.

Congress plans to make computer crime law much, much worse

hplasm
Meh

Re: Pick & choose laws

I think they only come in one type now- competition has been eliminated.

Pyongyang Photoshop tomfoolery shows wet Norks, skirts blown up

hplasm
Happy

Yes

A big one and a slightly smaller but otherwise identical one.

hplasm
Happy

Re: i can't see the obvious fakery either

second wave (clone of clones brush) has 16 hovercraft. And so on.

That's a lot of eels!

Forget the invisibility cloak: Boffins invent INVISIBILITY FISHNETS

hplasm
Happy

Re: Invisiblity fishnets

"I can't feel my legs!"

"What legs?"

Wealthy London NIMBYs grit teeth, welcome 'ugly' fibre cabinets

hplasm
Devil

Re: Abusing the legislation

In a word- Cantenna!

Scan your branes LIVE IN REAL-TIME, thanks to GPU-surfin' boffins

hplasm
Boffin

Sigh.

Recently- 'Speak you're Branes' (ifyoulikeitsomuchwhydontyougolivethere.com/)

As any fule kno.

Kids today...

Spanish Linux group files antitrust complaint against Microsoft

hplasm
Mushroom

RedmondRoller.

I agree. Take it and go.

Then the EU can revoke copyright on the crap.

Experts agree: Your next car will be smarter than you

hplasm
Devil

AUDI-

It's German for ADHD.

(Not really...)

Microsoft LOVES YOU: Free Wi-Fi on the British railways for a month

hplasm
Devil

Office 365 vs British Railways

Most reliable? Discuss.

Next from Microsoft: 'Blue', the Windows 8 they hope you don't hate

hplasm
Happy

Re: I like W8.

Lose W8. For your future health.

hplasm
Happy

Re:King Zongo

i think you're confusing Eadon with 'Clueless Wintards'.

Microsoft splashes coat of paint on Windows 8 comms apps

hplasm
Meh

Re: That is work, not life.

"improvements to your Windows experience"

I draw your attention to the above, and restate- the only improvement would be it's absence.

Roomba dust-bust bot bods one step closer to ROBOBUTLERS

hplasm
Happy

Re: Needs to be housewife proof

Then it would need to be connected to a massive bank of other computers- possibly all of them- to do Female Logic

hplasm
Happy

The ability-

To tell the difference between Pringles and toilet paper is paramount in a Robo-butler; unless you have a penchant for that sort of thing...

iPads in education: Not actually evil, but pretty close

hplasm
Happy

Re: Loads of artists just fat brushes!

Just try calling one that...

hplasm
Meh

*IT as in

I have a copy of the IT curriculum.

Branson, Berners-Lee, Google, £2m: LET'S SAVE THE WORLD

hplasm
Meh

Re: it's life or death to some poor wretch!

The chief exec of a UK charity?