* Posts by hplasm

5611 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

YES, Xbox One DOES need internet, DOES restrict game trading

hplasm
Meh

Re: Xbox One already broke Pre-Order records...

True. Never has so much apathy been generated by a console launch.

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: Microsoft: "We're always listening to our customers"

"- it's a sort of indistinct muttering, an annoying sort of buzz; we tend to try and ignore it."

IT staff clamouring to pay for their own BYOD kit, says survey

hplasm
FAIL

Re: Get over it

Waaa! the network's slow!!

*clickety* No. It's your piece of shit BYOD. Get it off my network.

Or bring your own.

'I can’t believe Jobs made the statement … Incredibly stupid'

hplasm
Coat

Re: Trivia

Perhaps the spelling would be kaki ?

Google's Schmidt calls climate-change deniers 'liars'

hplasm
FAIL

Re: @hplasm

I make no case. You make a claim, the onus is on you to prove it.

hplasm
Meh

Re: What's his angle?

It does if you get paid to tell people to stop them. and then sit back and watch .

hplasm
Meh

Re: But there sure is OVERWHELMING evidence.

Present it.

Whitehall grants copyright pirates safe haven until 2015

hplasm
Paris Hilton

Re: "Fair and Balanced"

Like Paris on 8in heels. Not very.

hplasm
Pirate

Me too-

Busy filling my shed with usb drives.

Study: US iPhone owners tend to be rich, educated, white

hplasm
Happy

Re: iPhone owners are rich

Well, they did claim to be Barristers...

Al Gore: Stop using the atmosphere as 'an open sewer

hplasm
Big Brother

Re:Al Gore is a tool.

Yes he is. But whose tool is he...?

Obama administration defends mass call-data slurping

hplasm
Big Brother

Re: Terror vs. Crime ... Which is the greatest threat to you or me...?

USAF- United States of Animal Farm.

It has a certain ring to it...

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: Hopey Changey the Community Organizer lands another one

Possibly with posterior anal pouches for heads? More likely.

Reg readers tumesce as they get their tongues round 'podule'

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: Translator podule

Schzlogadadit!

All major UK ISPs prepping network-level porn 'n' violence filters

hplasm

@ chrisn

You use IE6 then?

Albert Einstein brings cheese and clean pyjamas to space station

hplasm
Happy

Re: "...treats such as peanut butter..."

They probably send non-vomit inducing peanut butter. It's rocket science, after all...

Raspberry Pi DUMBS DOWN to target world+dog

hplasm
WTF?

Re: Not dumbing down

Shall we get off your fucking lawn too, AC?

Internet pioneer Vint Cerf predicts the future, fears Word-DOCALYPSE

hplasm
Meh

Re: Vint says:-

If they hasn't won documents would still be in someone ELSE'S proprietary format.

Perhaps...

hplasm
Meh

Vint says:-

"I'm not blaming Microsoft..."

Why the hell not? It's their fault.

Microsoft parades Windows 8.1, the version you may actually want

hplasm
Windows

Re: a zoo where every device works a tad different, speaks different formats etc.

Sounds like MS Office to me.

hplasm
Meh

Re: we don't need a start menu/screen that takes up a whole screen

" You can't use any apps while the menu is open "

Why would you? Tiles are for 'apps', menus have Programs.

hplasm
FAIL

Re: What would really make a huge difference is fixing the license

"Thanks but no thanks. I stick to free licences like Apache"

I think you mis-spelled 'Unenforceable shrinkwrapped EULA; there.

Might have been a slip of the penable pen.

hplasm
Meh

Re: Start Icon != Start Menu. This the problem.

What key? I ask, you tit- this is a tablet.

It's a fiddle! Funnyman's Irish tax flashmob floods Apple flagship store

hplasm
Big Brother

Re: $100Bn cash pile

It's the US tax way- even the 2012 Olympics winners from the US had to pay tax on the cash and a percentage of the medal's worth...

New Tosh 'droid slabs include Newton-like scrawl-pad: We try it out

hplasm
Windows

Re: Easy to see that Win8...

"Professional organisations need professional products. Bear that in mind and say 'No' to Windows 8"

Microsoft waves white flag: We'll put Outlook on Windows RT slabs

hplasm
Meh

We'll put Outlook on Windows RT slabs

Like that is supposed to be an improvement? Outloook!

Steelie Neelie: Crack down on wicked ISPs so we can Skype

hplasm
Happy

Re: Tabloid tone?

ooo- it's back again. Ta.

hplasm
WTF?

Re: Tabloid tone?

Hey- I can't edit any more... where's my badge gone???

hplasm
Unhappy

Tabloid tone?

You haven't read the tabloids recently, have you?

El Reg is not 99% shit.

Pen+tablet bandwagon finally rolling, Nvidia leaps aboard

hplasm
Happy

Where's mmeier?

He's missing this- penables!

Boffins build gesture recognition using WiFi

hplasm
Happy

Re: Spying

You may be interested in my pattern for brillo-pad underwear?

Exclusive Halo game coming to Windows 8 and WinPhone 8

hplasm
Meh

Also meh.

What next? A free hat?

Microsoft touts business features of Windows 8.1

hplasm
Windows

Re: Too little, too late ....

Not to burst your bubble, but no-one gives a fuck about Windows anymore.

hplasm
Devil

"how easy it will be to use these new "features"...?"

It will probably require CMD and Powershell and much RegEdit...

It just works.

hplasm
Meh

An impressive selection of features.

I wonder how many will work?

Remember Longhorn. That turned out well.

Shorteurs rejoice as Vine comes to Android

hplasm
Gimp

Wow-

aren't the Appletwatters getting their knickers in a twist?

O dear how sad, never mind.

Review: Philips Hue network enabled multicolour lightbulbs

hplasm
Boffin

Re: blutooth

There are X10 versions- they need X10 adapters for the power to the lamps though.

Ex-Microsoft man plans brand of consumer marijuana 'fine cigars'

hplasm
Happy

Re: I thought it was de criminalised in the uk

Nah- they just changed the subnet mask.

hplasm
Happy

Re: Paper Clip returns

Just Bing for Bong!

hplasm
Happy

Re: Win8 SP1

Maybe it's exactly that, the ability to think sideways.

And scroll sideways!

I think you may be on to something there...

hplasm
Alert

Win8 SP1

Puff. Puff...Oh wow....look! It does make sense now!!

Graphene QUILT: A good trampoline for elephants in stiletto heels

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: Another SF scenario in the making

Stand on Zanzibar, by John Brunner. A terrorist/activist attack on a bus- only one fatality, IIRC, whose head was turning when it was severed- the rest, had decaptations that just joined back up due to the thinness of the cut...

Doctor Who? 12th incarnation sought after Matt Smith quits

hplasm
Meh

Re: dr normal

Wow. Aren't you dull?

Sacred islet Rockall defeats Brit adventurer

hplasm
Happy

Britannia does rule the waves.

But sometimes the waves win.

Motorola shows off tattoo and swallowable password hardware

hplasm
Headmaster

Re: But 666 is a wonderful number!!

Caustic means it burns- acid or alkali, it doesn't matter.

NASA: Trip to Mars would exceed 'fatal cancer' radiation risk

hplasm
Coat

And don't rely on-

any anti-radiation drugs from those hippies on Skaro- didn't work for Roy Castle...

Former Microsoft Windows chief: I was right to kill the Start button

hplasm
FAIL

He killed the Start Button.

But he didn't make sure it was dead, and just like in the movies, it came back and killed him.

Microsoft's Windows 8.1 secrets REVEALED ... sort of

hplasm
Meh

"Their customers have not been screaming for a Start Menu."

True. They are Win8 customers, and therefore merely screaming because of that.

Windows 8.1 Start button SPOTTED in the wild

hplasm
Meh

This seems rather half-arsed

and I don't think it will satisfy the requirements of the masses.

Tim Cook: Wearable tech's nice, but Google Glass will NEVER BE COOL

hplasm
Meh

Cook says:-

"Nothing that will convince a kid that's never worn glasses or a band to wear one* - until we stick a half-eaten fruit logo on it?

He's also never heard of sunglasses...