* Posts by hplasm

5610 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

No, BMW, petrol-engined cars don't 'give back to the environment'

hplasm
Pint

Seeing as it's a BMW,...

Damn! Beat me to it...

La La La, I can't hear you: FCC responds to net neut concerns

hplasm
Devil

Re: Ajit Pai

...and no charger.

Creepy Cayla doll violates liberté publique, screams French data protection agency

hplasm
Happy

Re: @ Richard Jones 1

@ Pascal...

er.. Woo$$$$H

Guilty: NSA bloke who took home exploits at the heart of Kaspersky antivirus slurp row

hplasm
Holmes

Re- they don't employ morons in the NSA.

[Citation needed]

"A fish rots from the head down."

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: The mind boggles.

"The scourge of stupidity infiltrates all levels of society..."

...from the top down, as well as the bottom up.

Completed that for you :).

WW2 Enigma machine to be seized from shamed pharma bro Shkreli

hplasm
Go

Re: The sole copy of Once Upon a Time in Shaolin

Do the right thing, WTC* - declare it Copyleft and distribute it free.

The he can have it back.

* Or whoever owns the copyright.

Ofcom proposes ways to stop BT undercutting broadband rivals

hplasm
Facepalm

Re: How about opening up Virginmedia's network

You might not realise, but VM use BT cabling where they don't have CATV cable installed to provide ADSL, just like Sky et al.

Muppet.

UK.gov admits Investigatory Powers Act illegal under EU law

hplasm
Thumb Up

Re: Why The Opposition To Court Approval

...parperwork...

Sums up the legal system nicely!

Oops: LinkedIn country subdomains SSL cert just expired

hplasm
Coat

Too late...

"Does this mean that linkedin could be hijacked into some spam slinging / identify theft/ scam operation?"

they were bought out by someone a while ago...

Lauri Love's US extradition appeal judges reserve decision

hplasm
Devil

Re: Just send him over there and good riddance.

"So what's the alternative, that the UK never extradite anyone to the US because our prisons are worse than UK prisons?"

Yep.

Unfit to plead before a US court? You may face 'indefinite detention'

hplasm
Meh

Re: Pathetic.

Pathetic?

Your post?

Elon Musk says he's not Satoshi Nakamoto and is pretty rubbish at Bitcoin

hplasm
Happy

Must be Al Gore.

Al Gore would definitely have made hay out of this.

Or Excelsior at least.

Excelsior!

Give 1,000 monkeys typewriters, they'll write Shakespeare. Give them robot arms, and wait – they actually did that?

hplasm
Coat

Re: Give an infinite number of monkeys and infinite number of typewriters

One handed monkeys can still post on facebook...

Thou shalt use our drone app, UK.gov to tell quadcopter pilots

hplasm
Big Brother

Re: Could they perhaps...

"How do they plan to enforce this?"

More jobsworths in peaked caps.

Munich council finds €49.3m for Windows 10 embrace

hplasm
Windows

Re: Non paid for support

"Shiela in also in accounts says yes and helps Barry."

Barry helps Norm. Norm helps Julie.

...by the end of the week, nothing works any more.

hplasm
Meh

€49.3m for Windows 10

€493m for Windows 10 User retraining.

Wizarding World of Harry Potter awaits Microsoft Office exam winners

hplasm
Coat

Re: HP who?

"Don't you mean H.P. Lovecraft?

Coat with a copy of the Raven in the pocket."

This has got to be a Poe...

hplasm
Happy

"Anyone who will admit to having been there on these pages?"

What? Admit to going to Florida? Never!

hplasm
Holmes

Re: The Dementors of Azkaban

Microsoft Licensing.?

Death Eaters

hplasm
Coat

Re: Harry who?

"They're not interested in HP any more..."

It's not been the same since Fiorina left...

hplasm
Devil

The Dementors of Azkaban

Or Microsoft Marketing as they are usually known.

Abolish the Telly Tax? Fat chance, say MPs at non-binding debate

hplasm
Coat

Its not the programs its the Elitist attitudes of the people that work there.

Didn't get the job then?

'Water on Mars' re-classified as just 'sand on Mars'

hplasm
Headmaster

Rather-

"Strong evidence pointing away from the presence of liquid water in the past, found on Mars".

And now, that is true.

Mythical broadband speeds to plummet in crackdown on ISP ads

hplasm
Meh

Re: Well...

Well, BT's been fucked for ages...

Possible cut to British F-35 order considered before Parliament

hplasm
Happy

Re: Why cats?

"You've not encountered the business practices and out-turn prices of people like Howdens, Magnet, Sharps, I see."

There is the advantage of getting them 'On SALE' for most of the year...

'Urgent data corruption issue' destroys filesystems in Linux 4.14

hplasm
Devil

Re: Slackware-current ...

"Running a bleeding edge distro is a bit like running Windows Insider."

But without the dancing, high-fives and vacuous expressions...

HPE CEO Meg Whitman QUITS, MAN! Neri to replace chief exec in Feb

hplasm
Happy

Re: The queen is dead

" Long live King Neri."

First of his Name!

...Oh, he's dead.

hplasm
Holmes

Re: Take the money and run

"Universities must be handing out lobotomies with MBAs these days."

I thought they were mandatory?

From Vega with love: Pegasus interstellar asteroid's next stop

hplasm
Coat

Re: spinners

"But what kind of object would have a shape like that?"

Mimas?

hplasm
Unhappy

I wish...

"Such an endeavour would have required a small automated science craft, atop of a very powerful rocket, ready for launch at a very short notice"

they do have may many of these- where the science involves fission/fusion airburst experiments...

Baaa-d moooo-ve: Debian Linux depicts intimate cow-sheep action in ASCII artwork

hplasm
Coat

How SAD...

Fake GNUs.

Microsoft's memory randomization security defense is a little busted in Windows 8, 10

hplasm
Devil

Re: Conversation at Microsoft during Windows 8 development

"Don't you think people will notice?"

"Do you think anyone will use this mess?"

iPhone X: Bargain! You've just bagged yourself a cheap AR device

hplasm
Devil

Re: Haven't we just been around this?

"But at least we know you like to live on the cutting edge of technology "

Windows Phone, there- more the disposable razor end of 'cutting edge'...

For goodness sake, stop the plod using facial recog, London mayor told

hplasm
Coat

Re: Oh that, Chelsea Flower Show v Notting Hill Carnival Question of where to 'trial', hey Amber?.

"I think the MET's recent use at the Cenotaph"

+++Positive Match+++: First Class Stamp Detected on Camera 1.

(I can't recall if Liz was there...?)

Car tax evasion has soared since paper discs scrapped

hplasm
Happy

Re: No car tax?

"Petrol angle grinders are becoming cost effective alternatives..."

But a lot harder to ride on!

Sparks fly as Databricks buddies up with Microsoft in the cloud

hplasm
FAIL

Azure Databricks

This name does not fill me with confidence.

Official: America auto-scanned visitors' social media profiles. Also: It didn't work properly

hplasm
Coat

Re: the DHS: it's only a state of mind

"No, Sherlock. That's 'martial' law. "

That would involve the Armed forces - perhaps he means Cowboys With Tin Stars

- Marshal Law...

US govt to use software to finger immigrants as potential crims? That's really dumb – boffins

hplasm
Coat

Re: Pre-cog

"...please create a "pre-cog" machine..."

One that only uses pulleies, obvs...

hplasm
Alien

Re: I've already seen this movie ...

It's the reboot:

Minorities Report

Illegal alien! --->

Inside Internet Archive: 10PB+ of storage in a church... oh, and a little fight to preserve truth

hplasm
Happy

Re: More of this sort of thing

"ISTR that Christ himself was well known for..."

Jeez, your'e old!!

Pastry in a manger: We're soz, Greggs man said

hplasm
Coat

Re: Who'd have thought

"We've got evidence for the existence of a bloke called Jesus, and the trouble he and his followers caused."

Good garden and pool maintenance people are hard to find...

hplasm
Devil

3 men, wise.

"According to the 'story', didn't the three 'wise' men actually spend a bit of time trying to find the right barn?"

First they did visit Pound Bakery, but lo, the Holy Roll(er) was not there...

hplasm
Angel

Re: But surely...

Take, eat - for this is my... sausage. *wink*

hplasm
Angel

Re: Who'd have thought

At least there is evidence that the sausage actually existed...

*burp*

Proof!

Confusion reigns over crypto vuln in Spanish electronic ID smartcards

hplasm
Big Brother

Are you hearing this, Blunkett?

This is the sort of half-arsed shit the UK would be in if you and your ilk had prevailed in 2006.

(We are just in a different flavour of half-arsed shit now...)

Black Horse Down, we repeat... yes, Lloyds Bank, again

hplasm
Paris Hilton

"Hi, I'm SO.."

>>.what? Overwhelmed by service desk calls? Pissed off? BOFH'y...

Rocky Ross 128 b might harbour aliens – and it's headed right for us

hplasm
Happy

"Everyone is gnoing to die!"

You don't gno that for sure! Have a bit of money, yu Gnostic!

TalkTalk sees red after chucking £75m on restructuring bonfire

hplasm
Meh

Re: hopefully

"It did."

After paying £58.9M to Dido as bye-bye money...

How can airlines stop hackers pwning planes over the air? And don't say 'regular patches'

hplasm
Holmes

Re: Here's a thought

"As always common sense becomes road kill in the rush to profits/convenience."

maxim: any problems may be traced to either Accountants or Lawyers, eventually.

hplasm
Coat

Re: How can airlines stop hackers pwning planes over the air?

"Airgaps. Airgaps. Airgaps!"

Aren't all 'planes airgapped, by their very nature?

I know, I'm going already!