* Posts by hplasm

5610 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Which actor should play Steve in upcoming biopic?

hplasm
Angel

Peter Cushing?

or Christopher Lee for the live Steve?

Nanotubes, sulfur expand battery storage

hplasm
Happy

Bloody RSC!

Keep your thespian noses out of out testubes!

hplasm
Devil

Never!

Brimstone. Avoid confusion.

hplasm
Meh

No

More likely due to the $1=£1 thing; even if they come from PRC.

And they will probably be the rong Colour...

hplasm
Unhappy

IUPAC- Isn't he dead?

Anyway, IUPAC can go and hang out with their friends the 'Pluto- Dwarf Planet' lot.

Splitters!

hplasm
Unhappy

Sulfur....

Wot The Phuck.

next- El Reg in txt spk.

Stallman: Jobs exerted 'malign influence' on computing

hplasm
Trollface

Really?

I thought Italians were cultured and polite.

Would you let your car insurer snoop on you for a better deal?

hplasm
Meh

How about making this mandatory for lorries?

They already have tachographs, so not much problem in adapting to it?

Microsoft gets trademark for retail store plans

hplasm
Meh

Let me the first

To copyright the terms whoop-de-do and So and/or What...

Survey: Most TV viewers surf while they watch

hplasm
Unhappy

If- I watched that crap,

and they started that crap; then, like MASH with a 'laughter' track, I'd stop watching.

Starbucks extends gratis Wi-Fi to UK

hplasm
Coat

But

the cake isn't very sticky either...

Post-pub nosh deathmatch: Kapsalon v quesadillas

hplasm
Happy

Mmm

Hungry now...

Gay-bashing cult plans picket of Steve Jobs funeral

hplasm
Happy

Baptards.

That is all...

hplasm
Happy

If God did smite more often-

More people might believe.

Just like the good old days!

More smiting and a cleaner brane!

hplasm
Coat

You mean

Westbarooga?

hplasm
Devil

godhatesmarlborobaptistchurch.com

anybody?

Water like that of Earth's oceans found in comet

hplasm
Alien

Habitable?

But water is toxic to the native Martians!

hplasm
Happy

Ah-

Halleluja = LF

Amen = CR

BT superfast home fibre plans fall behind schedule. Again

hplasm
Happy

BT Trials of blown fibre prove-

That BT blow, but only half as much as everyone thought.

Also, installing without a duct wouldn't last 2 minutes in the UK, as that is the mean time before someone else digs the road up. (MTBSEDTRU).

Ten reasons why you shouldn't buy an iPhone 5

hplasm
Happy

Poor Lewis-

DID you get an iPhone for your birthday then?

'Boss from hell' knuckle-rapped for 'firing contests'

hplasm
FAIL

Comprehension not your strong point?

Boss runs contest on 'who will I fire for nothing next' and you don't see a problem with that?

Amateur troll at best. D-

Ecclesiastical judge tells church: Let there be Wi-Fi

hplasm
Holmes

Obviously!

The Wi-Fearers wouldn't go outside into the seething radiation hell that exists beyond their caves of steel!

Microsoft takes the Android profit, the Wonkas take the pain

hplasm
Thumb Up

You have clue!

You really should have put your name to this- it's spot on!

500 jobs threatened as Virgin Media shutters Liverpool call centre

hplasm
Thumb Up

The cable guys are mostly sub-sub contractors (small 'c' ), and some can't even use the toilet without pissing all over the seat...

don't ask...

007's car outdrives iPhone in battle of the brands

hplasm
Happy

Interesting-

and unknown!

Mighty trash-bag balloon cluster soars above Nevada

hplasm
Happy

Lawchair Larry-

Friend and confidante of Judge Judy?

Boffins invent miracle pill that counteracts effects of booze

hplasm
Happy

I thought it was-

Binge-drinking in alcohol preferring ratboys...

hplasm
Big Brother

Didn't the KGB

Invent a sober-up pill a few years ago (obviously) ?

HTC reckons 'WinPho will give Android a run for its money'

hplasm
Windows

Funny-

That's much what Nokia said...

Nokia axes another 3,500 jobs

hplasm
Linux

Bear, woods, pope-

you know the rest...

Stars say relativity still works

hplasm
Happy

Er, -

the weight is zero, in all units...

Apple loses bid to trademark 'multi-touch'

hplasm
Gimp

Dweeb?

You logged in as AC, but left your handle as a sig...

tut tut.

Taxmen extend biz record check pilot

hplasm
Facepalm

That's going to happen anyway-

for the bod in the street...

Ex-Microsofties' IE6 kill squad hits UK

hplasm
Thumb Up

Unibrowse

For unibrows- who run IE6...

(and PHBs)

Android outsells Apple 2:1

hplasm

MS denies secure boot will exclude Linux

hplasm
Mushroom

Hush.

Grownups are talking.

Neil Armstrong: US space program 'embarrassing'

hplasm
Thumb Up

Listento these guys.

They know what they are talking about.

Faster-than-light back with surprising CERN discovery

hplasm
Headmaster

Schoolboy error, unfortunately...

The biBle says no change from Adam & Eve onwards.

Attention metal thieves: Buy BT, get 75 MILLION miles of copper

hplasm
Happy

The coppery-

Of the exact same thing happening with gold- but with far less usefulness...

Why do these traders get billions to play with, unchecked?

hplasm
Unhappy

Excellent article again!

More proof that we are, indeed living on what will be the Ferengi Homeworld.

Microsoft exec departs after tweet about Nokia phone

hplasm
Happy

The hardware cracks?

Bad QC...

Microsoft milks Casio for using Linux

hplasm
Trollface

You keep yousing the word- "we"...

It echoes under your lonely bridge...

clip-clop.

Hunt for long-lost Apollo 10 moon lander adrift in space

hplasm

Oh Dear...

In the genre, isn't it always an astronomy-minded schoolkit that spots the Earth-shattering comet/asteroid/alien craft?

The hills- run for them!

Verity's secret shame revealed

hplasm

I'm up for it-

-removal of the skirt/bandage.... not replacing it.

Samsung preps anti-iPhone 5 lawsuit before it's even out

hplasm
Thumb Up

"I Five"

*clap*

NASA unveils its chosen Shuttle successor

hplasm
Boffin

As a wise man once said about the Apollo project-

"We do these things,not because they are easy, but because they are difficult." (or similar)

Practical methods don't arise from ease, but from difficulty.

Star Wars: The Complete Saga Blu-ray disc set

hplasm
Happy

A test,

this is, for her.

Blue Screen of Death gets makeover for Windows 8

hplasm
Meh

Like MS care ?

It would be a

Microsoft bans all plugins from touchable IE10

hplasm
Happy

Aha-

I need to upgrade my version of Flash...

Windows 8: Half million previews downloaded in 24 hours

hplasm
Linux

Half-a -million downloads of Win8-

That's what happens when AOL stop sending out free CDs.

You need something to rest your cup on...