* Posts by Paul RND*1000

406 publicly visible posts • joined 9 Jul 2009

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SCO gets sale approval

Paul RND*1000
FAIL

How to make $100,000 in the UNIX business

Start with $25 million and try to extort Linux users with a dodgy lawsuit.

Paul RND*1000

It makes no sense!

Nothing SCO did in the last 7 years or so made sense. Why change anything now?

US undergrads crash NASA satellite into Arctic

Paul RND*1000
Coat

Afoot?

No no no no! The apocalypse is quite clearly a *hand*, poised on the controls and ready to drop white-hot satellites on our heads without warning.

Unless they used their feet to steer the thing with because their hands were busy texting their mates and Twittering.

IT engineer fights spider with improvised flamethrower

Paul RND*1000
Flame

Win!

I salute your action in the service of humankind.

The only good wasp is one that's done to a crisp, doused in chemical death or smeared very thinly between two surfaces.

Drunken employee pops cap in server

Paul RND*1000
Big Brother

Maybe not

Wonder how many offers he'll get from reality TV producers?

Paul RND*1000
Grenade

Caliber/projectile

Easy answer: the bigger the better, ideally explosive or incendiary. Hell, I'd call in an air strike if I had the option...

Paul RND*1000

Dangerous Weapon

There are non-dangerous weapons? Isn't the whole purpose of a weapon the danger it poses to those on the receiving end of it?

Energy-saving LEDs 'will not save energy', say boffins

Paul RND*1000

Two ways this could be true

1. You replace that single 100W equivalent CFL in the middle of the ceiling which you only run while you're in the room with lots of trendy accented/spot lighting which stays lit for longer because it's part of the decor and would be pointless switched off.

2. You want to have the interior of your home make the inside of the sun look dim by packing as much lighting as possible into it and leaving it on in every room 24/7.

#1 is not just plausible, but a near-certainty.

#2 assumes that you have a real need for that level of brightness. If you have a TV, movie or photographic studio, getting sunlight equivalent brightness with continuous sources could be very useful, but I wouldn't want to light my living space like that.

Stockholm schoolgirls fined for bugging staff room

Paul RND*1000
FAIL

You know...

What they did required a reasonable amount of time, effort, planning and even some intelligence (we'll assume the one who didn't blow their cover on Facebook was the criminal mastermind, and the blabber was merely the sidekick).

I can't help but think that had they applied the same amount of effort into just learning what they were taught, they could have improved their grades anyway. I'll admit though that what they *did* do is a hell of a lot more fun sounding than study!

Google tests 'streaming' search engine

Paul RND*1000
Thumb Down

This is why...

...I firmly believe that ALL people involved in web design and development should be forced to work on a LAN connection that's been throttled down to about 5kb/s one day per week, to remind them that not all users are fortunate enough to even have a reasonable faster option available.

When dial-up has finally gone the way of the dodo (which in the USA will be "never", unless universal access requirements are applied to broadband just as they now are to landlines), then they should be throttled to whatever the slowest commercially available broadband option is. Just to make the experience complete, they should have any bandwidth beyond a certain amount taken out of their paycheck, to simulate how real world broadband users have to live.

Facebook Places - why, and why not

Paul RND*1000
Big Brother

Opt in

Ridiculous, yes. Surprising, not so much. This is classic Facebook behavior after all. Add some "awesome new feature", turn it on by default, and make it a PITA to turn off.

Extra Big Brother Bonus Points for allowing your "friends" to flag up where you are and making you change a different setting to prevent that. Consider it as training for the next generation of people who are being conditioned to watch and report on the activity of those around them.

On a related note, when you spend more time playing security settings whack-a-mole than you spend using the site, you have to wonder why bother at all.

George Lucas names Star Wars Blu-ray release date

Paul RND*1000

Nailed it...

...I think you have.

Paul RND*1000

"tidy them up"

For "tidy them up" read: "it's taking longer than expected to render the newer, improved-er end sequence for RotJ. The scenes where Jar-Jar dances with the Ewoks are proving particularly vexing, but fear not, we'll have them sorted in time for the BluRay release!"

ASA: You can't say 'f**k'

Paul RND*1000
Grenade

2/1000

So, to sum up: Based on a sample of 1000 households the most fragile, easily offended 0.2% (at *most*) of the population can effectively overrule the other 99.8% who don't see what the big fuss is, or who are grown-up enough to not force their own personal moral views on others (they're free to not do business with that company, and find one which fits in with their own views, after all).

This is why we have the creeping insanity that is political correctness.

Court slaps down coppers in photography case

Paul RND*1000

It's implicit consent

If the law-abiding public generally cooperates with plod, plod can do his/her job effectively, i.e. they are able to police. The public are consenting to their doing so.

If the public don't trust the cops, they won't cooperate and may even actively resist policing efforts. Implicit non-consent, making PC Plod's job difficult if not impossible. Hard to investigate a crime when the general public won't tell you anything and the less civil members of society are lobbing half-bricks at your head just for being in the area.

Liberal Google, Yahoo!, Apple hurting America claims Reagan

Paul RND*1000
Joke

Pen?

I thought green crayon was more their level...

Is it all over for Mars Rover?

Paul RND*1000
Unhappy

Is it wrong for me...

...to feel a little bit like crying just now?

Apple ditches video evidence

Paul RND*1000
FAIL

Uh, no.

If "textbook PR" equates to "turning me off Apple, possibly forever" then good job, Apple PR.

All I got out of the "textbook response" you speak of was "Mistake, what mistake? We never make mistakes, we don't give a crap what you say, you're just dumb customers who should stop whining and enjoy the awesome product we sold to you. Here's a video we pulled out of our ass to prove that we're better than everyone else".

Of course I'm not a PR professional, so obviously I don't know what the hell I'm talking about. But I can't help thinking that's not such a good impression to be giving to potential customers, most of whom are NOT PR professionals.

Police chief: Yes, my plods sometimes forget photo laws

Paul RND*1000

Oh, just wow...

You *do* realize that every time some innocent civilian is harassed, beaten or murdered in the name of "protecting us from terrorism" or "won't somebody think of the children", public resentment increases just a little and those "difficult circumstances" faced by officers become just a bit more difficult?

What is the "poor fellow" supposed to do? Obeying the bloody laws he's supposed to uphold on our behalf would be a damn fine start.

Photography only causes problems if it's blatantly intrusive to someone who isn't already pimping themselves out in the name of celebrity anyway (sorry, but public figures are fair game within reason, after all their career depends on being in the public eye), or if you're some sort of paranoid whack-job who seems criminal activity in *everything*.

Paul RND*1000

I think...

We have just discovered amanfrommars' true identity!

Paul RND*1000

How Hard Can It Be?

It's really rather simple, isn't it? If photography isn't expressly prohibited in a certain area, then it's within the law. If it's "acceptable" for coppers to sometimes "forget" this, how the hell can the public be expected to trust them with any of the other laws they're supposed to uphold and abide by?

And if they're making it up as they go along, based on whether or not they "like the look of someone", then why should we trust them, ever? As for terrorism, don't even bother going there, it's been a convenient excuse for abuses of power now for far too long, the real terrorists are masquerading as public servants these days.

Sure, this could all be attributed to a few bad apples, but the problem runs deeper. If the system worked and punished the abusers of power, the rest would quickly figure out how to remember laws a bit better, lest they themselves fall foul of them.

3D films fall flat

Paul RND*1000

Damn straight!

Every time I see the brutalized version of Return of the Jedi, with the "young Anakin" ghost at the end, I want to find George Lucas and insert a light saber into his "where the sun don't shine" place. Seriously, what the hell was he thinking there?

If movies could apply for restraining orders, Lucas wouldn't be permitted within 100 yards of the original Star Wars trilogy.

The Wrath of Jobs' latest victim: Motorola

Paul RND*1000
Jobs Horns

CEOs named Steve

What is it lately with CEOs named Steve? We've had Steve Ballmer going unhinged and paranoid, and now Steve Jobs' head appears to be coming undone and it's only a matter of time before furniture starts to fly.

So you screwed up. Fix the problem instead of trying to whitewash it.

Steve Jobs denies Judas Phone antenna problems

Paul RND*1000
Jobs Horns

So, to sum up

Steve doesn't see any problem.

Well, I suppose it *is* hard to notice that your call has been dropped when you've got your fingers jammed firmly in your ears and are singing "LALALA LA LAAA!!" at the top of your voice to drown out the, like, totally unfair criticism and stuff.

Pressure mounts on Apple to recall iPhone 4

Paul RND*1000
WTF?

Toyota != Apple

Look, someone at Cupertino clearly cocked up. This happens to Apple occasionally, when their designers get just a little too clever for their own good and turn out incredibly stylish computer cases which crack, or screens which scratch if the wind blows hard enough past them, or whatever. They're undeniably good at what they do, but they do NOT walk on water despite what some fans might care to believe. This is a design flaw, and you can be sure it'll be fixed in the next iteration of iPhone regardless of what they do with the existing 4G.

But comparing this with the Toyota recalls? Seriously? Dropping a call will aggravate you, but it's something you expect from a mobile phone, now and then. That's just the nature of mobile telephony.

Whereas your car accelerating out of control will do a whole lot more than momentarily inconvenience you and is not something you expect to have happen once in a while under normal conditions.

It's not the end for stop and search

Paul RND*1000
Big Brother

Almost sounds like...

"The indications were that our borough was not doing enough of these."

There's a quota for stopping suspected terrorists? Awesome, I feel SO much safer now.

NSA setting up secret 'Perfect Citizen' spy system

Paul RND*1000
Big Brother

Unnecessary

When they can determine where anyone is based on cellphone location data anyway and nearly everyone old enough to talk has one.

Of course you could always "forget" to bring your phone with you.

SCO rises from the dead (again)

Paul RND*1000
IT Angle

SCO's mission statement should be

BRAAAAAAAAIIIIINNNNNNS.

Remember, aim your improvised weapons at the head and neck and do NOT, repeat NOT, split up or attempt to burn them with fire.

"IT angle?" because SCO is no longer relevant to the IT world.

'The internet's completely over', declares petulant Prince

Paul RND*1000

%s/the internets/Princes career/g

There...I fixed it for you.

Secrecy fetish drove Steve Jobs' analytics bust

Paul RND*1000

Location data

That strikes me as a little bit "chicken and egg". You need to know location data to decide which languages to localize for, but unless you've already localized for that language, the only users will be those who understand a language that's already supported.

OS version and (non-unique) device details are all fine and dandy, and very useful information to have as a developer. Anything uniquely identifiable (GPS coords + time, IP address + time) is out of bounds as far as I'm concerned because it *can* be used to ID an individual user.

Romford coppers try to stopper young snapper

Paul RND*1000

Wonder which will run out first?

Public support for a police force which is increasingly busy harassing people who are not breaking the law, while letting real criminals slide (those pesky real criminals are so hard to catch after all)

or

The annual Met Police budget, from paying out compensation to the people unlawfully harassed by their jackbooted thugs^W^W officers?

Vauxhall Ampera extended range e-car

Paul RND*1000
Thumb Up

Yes, big improvement

I read once how the Prius' much-hyped "Hybrid Synergy Drive" works. It's a wonder of technical achievement in that it's so ridiculously technically overcomplicated it's a wonder it works at all. It's as if they were so fixated on finding a clever solution to the problem that they missed the bleedin' obvious simple one. As a programmer, I can appreciate how that happens. :) GM have a mechanically much simpler, lighter system working here, fewer complex bits to break and the dino-juice motor only needs to be large enough to power the electric motors and put a charge on the batteries. Much more efficient than turning the wheels directly.

This might be the first EV/hybrid which is practical for my needs. My 5-days a week commute is 17 miles each way with easy access to electricity at both ends. I run into town maybe once a week (about a 60 mile round trip) and only rarely need to go really long distances. If the batteries come even close to their rated range, my biggest problem would be having to add fuel stabilizer to the petrol so it stayed fresh for the several months it took to use a tankful!

Whether it's cost-effective or not would depend on how much it costs to charge, from mains power, compared to the same mileage covered in a similar sized petrol-only car. I suspect it'll be much cheaper to run in most places.

As for being greener, that all depends on the way the mains power you use is generated, and how the batteries etc. are manufactured. EVs aren't as "green" as they're made out to be when you look beyond fuel mileage, but from a purely selfish view (spending less money on fuel) this car looks good to me.

Paul RND*1000

No stick = no problem

You forget that the only reason internal combustion powered vehicles even need a gearbox and clutch/torque converter is because of the ridiculously narrow power and torque bands they provide, the upper and lower operating limits on RPMs (too low = stall, too high = floating valves, oil shear, self-disassembly - which is why modern mills have limiters) and because they can only turn in one direction. With a gas or diesel engine, I'm with you; automatics suck.

OTOH an electric motor can operate at a wide range of speeds from completely stopped to very high RPMs, do it backwards or forwards and push out lots of torque to get things moving from a total standstill. You don't really need any more than one gear ratio with a well-designed EV, don't need a clutch or torque converter for low-speed operation either. Seems to work for Tesla's Roadster in any case.

Future quantum computers could be made of... silicon?

Paul RND*1000
Coat

letters and/or digits

So, exactly like the last computer to be built which had the word "Quantum" associated with it?

Mine's the one with the Microdrive cartridges in the pocket.

Nobody trusts anything - shock poll

Paul RND*1000

Trust

Well, I trust the big media as much as I trust Facebook or Twitter. Which is not much at all.

There's also the issue that nobody trusts polls either. So, erm...yeah.

Google claims Wi-Fi slurp legal in the US

Paul RND*1000

Not buying it

A mistake? A "rogue coder"? So Google don't have code audits as part of their QA? None of their big brains noticed this? And when they did "find out", they kept the data anyway?

Their defense basically depends on them selling the idea that they were stupid. Google are many things, stupid is not one of 'em. This was deliberate, their only regret is getting called out on it.

ThinkGeek trembles before Pork Board's pork sword

Paul RND*1000

Hmm

The other other white meat?

Except it isn't really white, it looks more like radioactive corned beef to me.

Unicorn, the other sparkly meat (post-"Eclipse" vampire being the first, obviously)?

Virginia cops liberate bound goat from car trunk

Paul RND*1000

Unexpected

Never expected Yr.Humble Correspondent's home county to appear in a Reg article, ever. We barely have Internet around here after all.

Anyway I'll keep this in mind if I ever have to transport a goat, it'll just have to ride shotgun. Presumably, having only one cupholder, I'll have to do without so the goat can have fresh water.

Then again, the A/C is out on my car and it's been frickin' hot lately, the trunk might be a more comfortable place to ride than the passenger cabin.

Apple iPad

Paul RND*1000

Very Cool, but...

It's undoubtedly cool, in the "gadgets for gadgets sake" way. If money was no object, I'd own one already.

But money *is* an object, so what it can do and where I can take it become important, how cool it is stops mattering. And there's the rub, in it's current iteration the iPad strikes me as the worst of several worlds: the sort of limitations usually associated with smartphones, but in a form factor that's not "everywhere, all the time" convenient.

If I'm going to put up with even one phone-like limitation, I want the thing to fit in a trouser pocket. On the other hand, if I'm going to be stuck with a device that won't fit in a pocket, I'd quite like it to be a fully-functional computer, even if it does have a touchscreen keyboard by default.

In other words, make the second generation iPad be half-a-Macbook, and we'll talk. Until then, iPad is for other people who are cooler and richer than me, and who consequently don't have to justify every purchase on the basis of actual usefulness.

Queuing for an iPad? Why?

Paul RND*1000
Happy

They cancelled Big Brother?

YEE-EEESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D *fist-pump* THERE IS A GOD!!!

Now get rid of the other ten dozen useless "reality" shows it spawned and we'll be onto something.

Massachusetts man in vacuum marinade shocker

Paul RND*1000
FAIL

Failed first attempt

DiLuigi's attempt to break into the untapped market for Soylent Green didn't go quite according to plan.

Garage worker prangs £200k Ferrari

Paul RND*1000
WTF?

So conflicted

I want to down-vote you so badly for that smug-arse "idiot buggy" comment but I'm with you on Murdoch, so I also want to up-vote you. Damn, damn and double-damn. :-)

City Police still using Terror Act to bother photographers

Paul RND*1000

Yes, they do a difficult job, but...

You're right, most people have no idea what police sometimes face in their day-to-day duties, but those same people are those whose trust is vital to the police being able to to their job at all. Harassment of those who are not committing a crime *will* destroy that trust. Difficulty of working circumstances is no excuse, you need the public's trust even if they *don't* get how hard your job is sometimes.

Sure we all make mistakes, but this particular mistake has happened often enough and been publicized widely enough recently that it's hard to see it as anything but deliberate thuggery and abuse of power when it happens now.

Make those "mistakes" enough times and watch how much more difficult policing will get when even law-abiding people treat you with suspicion. Want an example? Go find someone who was in the RUC and had to attempt to police areas where they were at best unwanted and at worst a target.

Brighton goes Green

Paul RND*1000

True equality

What's wrong with making a decision based *solely* on suitability for a task? That's what true equality should look like, and if some men can't handle being overlooked because a woman really was better for the job, that's their problem and they've got no right to whine about it.

But offer the possibility that they were overlooked based on something besides merit and you can expect that shrieking to continue. If it's proven that's what happened, the complaints become justified and could even lead to situations where someone who genuinely got the job because of merit can have that merit called into doubt because of their gender, colour, whatever...hardly a bold step in the right direction for equality, that.

Javascript guru calls for webwide IE6 boycott

Paul RND*1000

It's about staying sane

Spoken like a true end-user. Try working in web development for a while then tell me you don't want to hold IE6 face-down in a bathtub until it stops struggling, too.

You should be free to look at the web however you see fit, that's kind of the point. But like it or not, the web has changed since 2001, sites are more demanding of browser accuracy in how they interpret well-defined standards, and if your choices mean you're part of a fraction of a percent of visitors, it's not realistic to expect that developers will go out of their way to accommodate you. It's essentially impossible to test for every possible combination of OS, browser and personal settings, so you test for the most common ones that cover nearly everyone. If the developer did their job right, and your browser follows standards, and your personal settings choices aren't completely off-the-wall, you're probably OK anyway.

This is where IE6 raises havoc. Getting websites to work properly in every other browser, even IE7, is generally not hard. If it displays normally in one, it should display normally in the rest without too much effing around, at least in my experience. But IE6, even in default out-of-the-box configuration, just doesn't play nice when it comes to rendering pages. It comes from a time when standards were being crapped all over in an attempt to grab market share and it shows. It's by far the biggest waste of developer time to get sites working right with it, but as long as it has some noticeable market share then there's a need for businesses to at least partly support it. Which means countless wasted hours that they're having to pay someone for to support a browser which should have gone the way of Netscape 4 by now.

I look forward to the day when IE6 share is low enough to ignore and if someone actually chooses to use it, well that's their choice and they have to live with the consequences. We still see occasional visits from NN4 and IE4 and 5, but I sure don't lose sleep over whether those 0.01% of our visitors had a good experience.

Jobsian Vendetta - Flash stabbed by Mac the Knife

Paul RND*1000
Gates Halo

Just wow.

This nonsense has got to be giving Microsoft a sort of warm, fuzzy feeling. Their competition is looking worse by the day, and they're not even having to lift a finger to make it that way.

Palin email jury reaches verdicts on 3 of 4 counts

Paul RND*1000

Yes, name-calling is pointless

The right wing have also thrown plenty of name-calling, ad-hominem attacks and even thinly veiled threats at people they don't agree with, rather than debate views. So don't try to pretend that it's only "leftists" who resort to name calling. That would be a lie and you know it, even if you refuse to acknowledge it.

That said, instead of name calling, Palin should be attacked for the things which really do point to her being unfit for public office. There are more than enough to choose from without ever having to resort to being childish and they're relevant whether you agree with her policies or not.

* There's a laundry list of ethics investigations, not all of which are frivolous or trouble-making in their intent. The most recent was filed by a registered Republican, who I doubt is a "trouble-making leftist" somehow. A lot of them relate to illegal use of state resources in electioneering, or illegally using her position for personal gain (like claiming travel expenses when not actually traveling, or drawing her salary as governor while off-duty during the 2008 election campaign).

* There are various abuses of power, well documented. She basically got away with a slap on the wrist over "Troopergate" but the fact that she even got a reprimand shows that allegation had truth to it. No reason to believe she wouldn't abuse power in other ways too.

* There's the core of this case: that she used a private email account for state business (which is illegal). The official state email she was supposed to use is traceable and accountable, which is no doubt useful while investigating ethics lapses and abuses of power.

* Did the RNC ever get all of those expensive clothes she bought with campaign money back?

* Alaska Independence Party, ties to.

* Her recent book "Going Rogue", accused by McCain campaign staffers of rewriting history to settle scores. Steven Schmidt, the campaign manager, was quoted as calling it "total fiction". I'm looking forward to his, or indeed McCain's, memoirs of the campaign if they ever choose to write them.

* Highly inflammatory statements made during the election campaign. There's a fine line between "stirring up the base" and "inciting hatred". Whether she crossed that line is a matter of opinion but she sure strayed dangerously close to it. She acted in a similar manner recently during and after the healthcare debate; gunsight graphics pointing at congressional districts whose representative voted for the legislation? Really? That's quite the statement she made, right there.

I get the feeling that's the tip of the iceberg, and look! No childish name calling or ad-hominem attacks required. Just verifiable facts which show her to be unfit for office, but admirably qualified to be a talk radio or cable news opinion host.

Hackers crack Ubisoft always-online DRM controls

Paul RND*1000

Since forever

This has been happening since the early 1980s. I played more than a few Spectrum games back in the day which were derivative, thrown together crap delivered with copy protection which had been given much more thought and development time than the game it tried to protect.

It usually took about 5 minutes for someone to crack those early DRM systems too, and the infinite lives hack would be in the pages of YS a month or two later. Besides, none of them were a match for a decent twin tape deck.

I'm sure all the other systems of the time had similarly pointless copy protection.

Jobsian drones shackle gamer with 'lifetime' iPad ban

Paul RND*1000
Jobs Horns

Lifetime limit

I do believe I've reached my lifetime limit for ridiculousness from Apple.

Sure, this was probably just some store employee getting his wires crossed, but why the cloak and dagger "we can't tell you why" nonsense?

More importantly, with Apple's recent control freakish behavior a lifetime limit carved on stone tablets^W^W iPads by the very hand of Jobs himself actually sounds plausible at first glance, which doesn't speak well for the image they've been projecting.

Nazi soldiers pose for Red Army calendar

Paul RND*1000

Not sure that they'd be thanksful for that, really

I'm not at all thankful that these memories are fading, and somehow, I doubt any veterans would be either. In fact it makes me worry for the future; how long until we repeat history that we've forgotten?

I wonder what will happen when the atrocities of WW2 have fallen out of "living memory" and become just another bunch of dry facts in a textbook, taught to disinterested teens by teachers who are just reading from said textbook and have no real connection to events themselves?

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