* Posts by ElNumbre

663 publicly visible posts • joined 15 Jun 2009

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Google lobs coder's Microsoft badge into rubbish bin

ElNumbre
Stop

MVP Bashers

Why all the MVP hate? These guys & gals know a product and service inside out and are happy to share their knowledge with the community. So MS gives them a badge and a few extra benefits.

Besides, I'm sure Google will come out with a new MVP alike (given that they like to copy everything MS does). How about Google Important Person (GImP)?

Spotify adds PayPal in bid for profitability

ElNumbre
Jobs Horns

Revisit...

Just let me know when the story is "Spotify adds Windows Mobile in bid for profitability".

Until then, I shall remain a freetard.

Cameron escapes Twitter twat rap

ElNumbre
Megaphone

Good News Everybody.

So, I'm OK to take a loudhailer to the Tory Party Conference, stand up and and shout into it, "Cameron, you're a tw@".

Attack of the Killer Tits

ElNumbre

@Brad

Err, putting 'IT' in 'tITs'?

ElNumbre
Paris Hilton

Knee Warmers

Tits like Coconuts - Perfectly acceptable.

Tits like Bats - No thank you.

Paris - Because I'm sure she could point out a man eating beaver.

Post Office will snap and dab for ID card scheme

ElNumbre
Big Brother

GoGoGo.

Desperatly trying to roll it out before they're kicked out of government. Then if Cameroon cancels the ID card scheme, Labour can say that they've wasted x billion pounds on a 1/2 implemented system.

Peugeot to offer in-car Wi-Fi in 2010

ElNumbre

Or....

...I could just use my Windows Mobile phone which can behave as a 3G->WIFI bridge. Simplez.

Anyway, unless they're installing an aerial somewhere outside the car, I can't see it being that useful, especially given how patchy the 3G network is, especially when you go beyond the boundaries of the urban grey.

AMD Eyefinity promises 'six panel, one GPU' gaming

ElNumbre
Go

Avoid Borders....

... Just buy 6 projectors.

TomTom UK and Ireland

ElNumbre
Stop

Multitasking..

I didn't see anywhere in the review that says what the behaviour is when you receive a phone call on the iPhone? Does the app pause, stop or do something else?

Ryanair faces ban on luggage charge auto-opt-in

ElNumbre

Oh well....

I'll never fly with them anyway...

Good Housekeeping readers play hunt the G-spot

ElNumbre
Coat

Good Housekeeping?

So, Good Housekeeping has found a story that's created a bit of a buzz. Well done!

BBC newsreader kidnapped by Phillip Garrido

ElNumbre
Thumb Up

What colour?

Reminds me of "Ron Burgandy" and how he reads anything on the autocue.

PMSL at that!

Post-Vista Windows flaw creates Blue Screen risk

ElNumbre
Thumb Up

PoD

Wow, like the 'Ping of Death' of old....

I guess that's what happens when you use bleeding edge technology like Vista.

CRB checks can take years to complete

ElNumbre
Thumb Up

Simplez....

Compare the IDcard.com, compare the CRB.com - Simplez. Sergei will get a new Computamabob and that way we can link your CRB check to your Biometric ID card guarenteeing 100% accuracies and a 1hr turn around time.

T-Mobile picks Orange for merger

ElNumbre
Thumb Down

Ohh Cock.

I hope TMob customers (me included) don't have to take Orange tariffs - they're the biggest pile of plop going, especially with regard to mobile internet.

Might have to switch to Three in about 16 months.

Music industry cooks UK government's piracy stats

ElNumbre
Stop

Define: File Sharing Software?

I use Windows, Windows Mobile, Linux, Email - All capable of sharing files with others.

How does that make me Johnny Depp?

HTC readies radical Touch HD revamp

ElNumbre
Thumb Up

Good News Everybody!

Hopefully this will give XDA-Developers a better/easier chance at porting Android to other HTC phones. I'd like to have the choice between Android and WinMo 6.5, even though 6.5 is amazing in comparison on 6.1.

BMW unveils futuristic Vision

ElNumbre
Terminator

And?

a) BMW will never build a car that looks like that. Merely the technology will be subsumed into the BMW 1-10.

b) BMW are pulling out of F1

c) I'm still not letting BMW drivers out of junctions.

Dixons blames PC World for falling sales

ElNumbre
WTF?

Offerings/Confusion.

Oh yes, and the other problem with DSG, certainly round by here is that we've got a massive new Curry's (I believe its their flagship store) and PC-World moved to a bigger store opposite a couple of years ago. Both sell TV's, both sell Computers. Both are doing home entertainment and computer accessories. The only difference is that Curry's does white goods as well.

Are there really that many people left who don't realise that they're the same company, offering the same products at the same price? Thats the only explanation I can see for building two stores from the same company, competing for the same customers opposite each other. Either that or poor management.

ElNumbre
Badgers

TBF..

My spending at DSG has actually increased in the last year. I've bought two internet radio's (MSRP £179, purchased at £24.99 each on clearance sale), a couple of wireless keyboard/mouse combo's on special at £29.99 ea (cheaper than off the 'net when factoring in postage) a mobile phone holder (£5, again, cheaper than off the net when factoring in postage) and a USB extension lead (a bloody rip off, so much so I've expunged the cost from my memory, but I needed it in an emergency!). I would however never buy anything 'big' from them like a computer, TV, iPod e.t.c. as the better deals are off the high-street. But they're a useful place to go and prod and poke the stuff your interested in (and gawp at the 100" telly) before shopping online.

One tip though given by a friend who shopped at Curry's for white goods - pick your product, open up your internet enabled (non O2/non iPhone), check the price on their website. Its often cheaper, and you can reserve it on the website right there AT THE WEB PRICE, walk over to collections and pay the discounted rate!

Google blames Gfail on 'availability' upgrade

ElNumbre

Meh but Duh.

Hasn't this 'failover' issue happened several times before at Google? IIRC the last time it took out the Google Search engine? Their upgrades do seem to throw spanners into the cogs on a regular basis, and the cause often seems to be other data centres refusing to take the extra load and shutting down.

But hey, its not like I pay for the service (other than handing over the wholesale records of my life), its not like I couldn't still receive the emails (my non-iphone not on an O2 network uses IMAP) and since when did email become something that required immediate response? Guys, if its that critical that you need to communicate with someone, there's a few inventions out there such as a "telephone", "pub" or even if you need to send written communications a "fax".

Gmail in massive web outage

ElNumbre

It was down?

I never even noticed. Mind you, I was spending the evening at the pictures with a chicken dinner afterwards. And my non O2 non-iPhone was still able to receive emails via imap from gmail.

Meh, you pays your money, you takes your choice.

Sony explains PS3 Slim's loss of Linux option

ElNumbre

Recompile my idea's...

Well, I've constantly revisited the PS3 as an ideal linux machine - powerful, small, inexpensive - and only now is one of those criteria being met (the ?small? part). Where it falls down is the lack of decent support for the cell processors, certainly in the area I've been looking at - video transcoding.

Developers don't seem interested in rewriting/optimizing their code to support the massive potential power available in the PS3, probably because there arn't enough people using it in the first place. Why bother when the 'standard' code will work across multiplatforms, especially when you can get good performance from standard x86/PPC type equipment without having to rewrite your code.

So, anyone wanting a cheap linux box - will buy a netbook.

Anyone wanting decent linux processing - will buy an x86 based machine.

Anyone wanting a blu-ray player - wait, does anyone want a blu-ray player?

Fire at Google UK

ElNumbre
Troll

Feeding the 5,000?

According to ElTel, "Around 5,000 Google staff and employees of other firms based in the six-floor building were evacuated",

5,000? I suspect they may have to be Umpa Lumpa's to be able to fit that many in, it doesn't look that big, either from Street View or Google Maps.

FSF launches Windows 7 anti-upgrade letter campaign

ElNumbre

H is for Oss.

Horses for Courses - I think its foolish for the FSF to say replace all your Windows with Penguins, people will just think you're crazy.

BUT, what can be done is to replace some machines running Linux. Particularly in the server environment where the end user doesn't see or care what the back end is running. Or, if you're using Terminal Servers, why not replace the local Winblows copy with Linux to host the terminal software. Simples!

UK population to abandon Midlands

ElNumbre
Joke

In the beginning, God created this Joke...

Poole? In Dorset?

Yes, its really quite agreeable.

Anyway, yes, Birmingham & the Black Country - yeah its pretty turgid, but at least there's only a stabbing/shooting every OTHER day. I would like to move out of the county and perhaps out of the country should circumstances allow.

Mobile snooping for everyone in weeks

ElNumbre
Paris Hilton

Hmm, I can't wait..

I'll get the relevant aerial/software e.t.c. and be able to hear

"Yeah, I'm on the train".

"Oh OK, I'll put your dinner in the oven".

Joy.

What I actually want is a way to listen into text messages - I bet some filth flies through those airwaves, especially late at night! :)

US Navy aims to make jetfuel from seawater uranium

ElNumbre
Coat

Anything like Uranus?

They can try making that, but I don't know where my anium is. I do excrete a sticky brown/black liquid though, usually after several pints of Guinness.

A quarter of Brits packing multiple mobiles

ElNumbre
Paris Hilton

Many years ago....

I only carried one phone many moons ago. Then they started building phones with Internet, Calendar synchronsiation, EMail, Camera's and the like, which work won't pay for. So I have a crappy Nokia something or other with a green and black screen for work, and a Touch Diamond2 to get out in the pub.

Its not the size of the phone that counts, its whether it can get pictures of puppies off the Internet to impress women with...

Devon force divulges ANPR towns online

ElNumbre
Coat

Sheepish..

Do the CCTV installers dress in Sheepskin jackets and when they've finished say

"You Ain't Seen Me, Right?".

I'll have one of those coats too.

Directgov farms out web content across Europe

ElNumbre

Concerned...

Its not the data being mirrorred at the front end in the EU I'm worried about, its the stream of information going out the backdoor to Redmond and Langley in the US.

But apart from renewing Car Tax, does anyone actually use direct.gov for anything?

Boffins build World's tiniest 'laser'

ElNumbre
WTF?

Whut?

Surely they should be investigating bigger, more powerful lasers. On the moon. That shall be renamed the "Death Star".

100 freetards an hour join Pirate Party UK

ElNumbre
Thumb Up

BetFred?

I wouldn't mind placing a bet that they could win a seat!

The big 2 are all inept corrupt inglurious barsterds.

The liberals are far from that.

Unless your a hippie or a racist, you've got nothing. Myself and at least 5 of my friends are considering a vote for them, depending on how their manifesto pans out...

Blaster anniversary recalls network worm heyday

ElNumbre

When I were a lad...

Ohh I remember those days - 200+ sites struggling to work because their WAN link was flooded with traffic. I had to build a patch CD to send to sites to allow users to apply the patch, install any other updates and run a 'cleaner' to remove it from every PC in the office.

It certainly got our 'strategy leaders' to consider proper patching procedures rather than believing that if it wasn't broke, it didn't need changing/fixing. They wouldn't accept previous arguments that changes prevented things breaking...

Exploding iPhone injures French teen

ElNumbre

Whut?

He didn't loose an eye? Whut?

May as well say "It didn't blow his cock off" or "His toe didn't fall off".

CESM...

Crystal ball torches woman's flat

ElNumbre
Flame

Not unforseen!!!

I've been hearing about these sorts of things for years, as long as I can remember in fact. But usually the culpret is 'Goldie' the Goldfish and his spherical tanks of destiny.....

Tourist magnet blows off Speedo-wearing men

ElNumbre
Coat

Iz nice?

I wonder if my mankini will be acceptable?

Coat because.. well, they'll ask me to cover up.

UK border control can't count

ElNumbre
Thumb Up

An Excel Formula.

DIV/0 errors are so messy, I suspect someone just tided the spreadsheet up a bit...

=IF(UKBA=147,"6",UKBA/IMCR)

T-Mobile UK starts shifting iPhones on the quiet

ElNumbre
Badgers

Big Spenders...

Funny, I spoke to retentions yesterday to try and get my HTC Athena/TMob Ameo with a HTC Diamond2/CompactV and they couldn't do any good deals at all. It would actually be cheaper for me to get a jPhone on O2 PAYG and buy top-ups over the 18 months than it was for any TMob direct contact. Even the HeroG2 chinnymabob worked out to be more expensive than a contract jPhone!

Then I found another supplier that could do a deal on a Diamond2 with Tmobz, so all is well.

China seals town after plague deaths

ElNumbre
Coat

Good News!

At least we don't have to worry about Swine Flu or SARS any more!

Mines the coat with the toucan style nose mask in the pocket.

Sky switches on 3D TV channel in 2010

ElNumbre
Paris Hilton

Mint Tray...

And all because the lady... Cant see the point in forking out 50 quid a month for that bloody sky telly. Why don't you do some chores Malcom? There's plenty DIY that needs doing round the house rather than you staring at that goggle box all day. Ohh, is that that David Beckham? Ohh he does look extra muscley these days, ohh, thats nice, very nice, ohh yes..... When's the soccerball on again Malcom?

Paris, because I await her movie in 3D...

Windows 7 Ultimate product activation hacked?

ElNumbre
Stop

Yellow Pages.

I wouldn't be surprised if Microsoft changes the locks within a few hours, revokes the leaked key, and makes Lenovo rebuild any currently mfrd machines with the new key and makes them pay a chunk of cash as 'make good' money.

Cameron condemns Tweeters as tw*ts

ElNumbre
FAIL

Commenturds?

I have to chuckle at everyone saying that Twitter is a waste of time, on the comments section of ElReg. Because this is really helping further human advancement...

Spotify: iPhone sideloads for £120 a year, unlimited

ElNumbre
Go

wmPhone

I love spotify, although their advertising seems to be becoming a little more pervasive in recent weeks, however without a client for Windows Mobile (and the associated subs) I can't justify coughing up.

However, they need to ensure that it supports 'streaming' or 'caching' on the move, otherwise I may as well just continue to copy my MP3's to my phone as and when I want to listen to them.

And for those complaining that you loose access to the music when you cancel your subscription - well, yeah, but then you just sign up with someone else. I don't mind paying £10 a month for someone else to rip albums, setup the album art, make sure the ID3 (or equivalent) tags are in place and then have a decent network connection to serve them up.

One final point though, they need to expand their range of "classic" artists. No Flloyd, No Oasis, No Zepp. Or rather, these artists need to see that music rental seems to be the model of the future and they should embrace these new ways of working, rather than ignoring it, then taking legal action against it, then embracing it 5 years after Napster and P2P appeared.

Beeb and co offload failed Kangaroo platform

ElNumbre
Go

Project Phoenix?

This is an excellent and cunning approach by the parties involved.

You can't launch an 'Anti-competitive' VoD platform that you've spent money developing.

You sell it to a 3rd party (one which is mainly interested in the broadcast of content supplied by content producers, rather than producing content themselves).

That 3rd party renames it Project Wallaby then offers it as an ideal VoD platform to broadcasters who then don't have to maintain loads of infrastructure, and pay a rental or 'maintenance' fee to add & serve content to it.

Everyone's happy, other than Murderock, who renames 'Anytime' to 'Pademelon' which everyone continues to ignore, despite constant and excessive marketing to the subscriber base.

PC repair shop caught trying bank fraud

ElNumbre
Coat

And in other news...

"Sky either misdiagnosed the fault or overcharged for repairs."

That was the only sentence I extracted from that bulletin.

Too-tall terror snapper stopped by cops again

ElNumbre

Unwelcome...

I for one do NOT welcome our Stazi copying overlords.

Wheels come off O2's data network

ElNumbre

.Re: Openreach #

BT Engineer's use the BT Mobile MVNO which offers connections on both the Vodafone (primarily) and O2 networks. The O2 is a hangover from BT's past, but a useful one. We as a customer of BT Mobile find this useful as each network has coverage in different areas, the hardest decision is deciding whats best.

Microsoft embraces Linux 'cancer' to sell Windows servers

ElNumbre
Paris Hilton

20,000 lines under the sea?

20,000 lines? Bah, Ms Hilton can do that many lines in a day....

Come back to me when they've added a few zero's to that line count.

Digital Spy fights second malware attack

ElNumbre

Standard Greetings...

Standard Greetings, standard response from last time.

However in the last few days I've started blocking ad's from DS, simply because their css was broken so didn't render in various browsers, particularly on the flaky forums..

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