* Posts by Thomas 4

1519 publicly visible posts • joined 11 Jun 2009

Bank whips out palm-recognition kit - and a severed hand won't work

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Taking bets

...that within a year of this technology becoming widespread, someone will attempt to sue Fujitsu for hand cancer caused by exposure to IR light.

UK injects £88m into Euro bid to build Hubble-thrashing 'scope

Thomas 4
Unhappy

Re: Daily defence spending...

Holy shit, when I read the first comment I thought I'd wandered onto the Yahoo comments section.

*shudders*

Twenty classic arcade games

Thomas 4

This is an outrage

No Afterburner on the list? For shame, sir!

US gov cash slash threatens manned trips to asteroids and Mars

Thomas 4

Re: Bah@Thomas 4

True but just imagine how much more *useful* it would be to take that $46bn cut from the military and give it to Nasa.

Thomas 4
FAIL

Bah

We've got no money to send rockets to other worlds but we've still got plenty of cash to send them slamming into other countries.

WHY would survey-slingers give YOU a free $1,500 Google Glass?

Thomas 4
Pint

A novel idea

I feel that Google Glass has terrific potential. You could feed your glasses prescription into them and have a bluetooth based sensor that sends your current blood/alcohol ratio to them too. Then your Google Glass recalibrates itself so that no matter how drunk you are, your vision is not impaired. That way, the cute boy or girl you hook up with at the end of a session remains cute when you wake up next to them the following morning.

Keyboard, you're not my type

Thomas 4

The best kind of keyboard

...is one you can beat a man to death with and type his obituary on afterwards.

Strategic SIEGE ROBOTS defeated by 'heavily intoxicated' man, 62

Thomas 4

Re: Valid tactics

"THE...HUMANOID....IS HUGGING....ME! HUGGING ME!!"

Thomas 4
Thumb Up

Re: Sense of déjà vu

That...is hilarious.

EU web chief: Europe's slow on 4G, but 5G GLORY WILL BE OURS

Thomas 4
Trollface

I can't wait for 5G

That 20Mb data allowance will be the fastest I've ever had, if 4G tariffs are anything to go by.

Apple patents situational awareness for oblivious fanbois

Thomas 4

This isn't actually a bad idea

A phone that actually says to you "Hey dumbass, stop looking at me and watch the damn road."

New social network is for DEAD PEOPLE

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Oh!

So *this* is what you IT people were talking about when you were going on about zombie networks!

That Firefox OS mobe: The sorta phone left behind after a mugging

Thomas 4
IT Angle

A somewhat harsh editorial...

...especially when it comes to Firefox OS. I have a Lumia 820 and like it as much as the next man, as long as it isn't Eadon. Yet even I recognise that a new OS entering the market can only be a good thing. Is it going to cause Google and Apple to quake in their boots? I doubt it. Will it inspire Windows Phone 8 and BB OS 10 to fight tooth and nail for the third spot, thus improving their own OSes and setting a benchmark for newcomers to aim for? I hope so.

Even the mighty Android and iOS had issues when they were first launched and had extremely small markets for their first year or so.

Review: Sony Vaio Duo 11 Ultrabook

Thomas 4

Didn't Asus do something similar a while back?

The was a whole bunch of gawping at the Transformer Prime but I vaguely recall something about an Asus Slider as well that worked in pretty much the same way as this Sony one.

US insurer punts 'bestiality' to wide-eyed kiddies, gasp 'mums'

Thomas 4

Re: Broke out the popcorn, clicked to the comments...

Is this what Shakespeare was harping on about when he made that comment about "The Beast With Two Backs"?

Boffin shows pics of germs grown on SPOTTY STUDENTS' MOBES

Thomas 4
Unhappy

I'm sad to say...

...that the class was wiped out when they decided to do a follow-up experiment involving a standard office keyboard. Those that weren't killed by a cocktail of disease were devoured by a QWERTY-based blob monster.

Is world's first space tourist Dennis Tito planning a trip to Mars?

Thomas 4
Stop

Re: NO return missions is what we need to do!

Screw that, even if it was a one way trip, to walk on another world in our lifetime is a priviledge that no banker or politician in the world is deserving of.

Thomas 4
Alien

The whole idea is absolutely barking...

...if the notes about the equipment not being ready are correct. Yet despite all this, I am hoping and praying that the launch goes ahead and that this madman gets his dream of walking on Mars. Godspeed, righteous fruitcake. o7

John Sweeney: Why Church of Scientology's gravest threat is the 'net

Thomas 4

It says a lot

...when I read something that puts even the frigging Mormons in a more positive light than the CoS. All the Xenu stuff - surely this is a joke right? Surely this *can't* be what the CoS belives right? Right? Oo

New blow for Microsoft Surface: Touch Chromebooks 'on sale in 2013'

Thomas 4

Not sure what to make of the Surface

I did briefly look at getting a Surface but the thing that puts me off the most is that the one I can afford uses Win RT. RT seems like the odd one out somehow because it's the only device so far that uses this operating system and (although I'm not a dev myself) I can't really see developers spending time and money creating applications for such a small market. If the smaller Surface had run Windows Phone 8, I suspect it'd be a more popular choice (although the pricing weighs it down unfavorably versus its rivals).

It's the same problem they had back in Round 1 of the Smartphone Wars, when there was the three-way between them, Symbian and Palm OS. They had the Pocket PC version of their OS (Windows Mobile), the smartphone version that cropped on on the SPV 500 phones and then Windows CE as well. Although Symbian had three different versions as well (Series 60, Series 80 and the very limited Series 90) they had a far larger resource pool to draw from, having several companies chipping in for R&D rather just one alone.

Google stokes hype machine over Project Glass robospecs

Thomas 4

Re: "No one really likes to wear glasses at the best of times"

I like seeing glasses on a woman. They give a wonderfully sophisticated and sexy look.

Quit the 2D internet, flee your cave, and GET LAID, barks rock star

Thomas 4
FAIL

Bullshit

Not to put too fine a point on it. My first real relationship was with a friend I'd met online and through many months and years of conversation with, eventually blossomed into the best two years of my life. If you tell me there's no romance to be found in a mouse click, you're doing it wrong.

EDIT: And as for the "no beauty to be found in games", do we really have to re-tread this tired ground again? Even Roger Ebert admitted he fucked up on that score.

Clarkson: 'I WILL find and KILL the spammers who hacked me'

Thomas 4
Meh

Uh-huh

Nice try but it sounded a lot more scary when it came from Liam Neeson's mouth.

EE's revenues dip, but smartphones lure in 200k new contracts

Thomas 4

Maybe...

...and this is just a shot in the dark here, if they weren't charging ball-bustingly high tarriffs with fuck all data allowance, I might have gone with them. Most normal folks balk at paying above 30-35 a month for their phone bills and if it's a choice between a larger allowance and slightly slower speed or fast and gone in the blink of an eye, most folks will go with 3G. The other thing to bear in mind is that even in London you can't get a 3G signal all the time, so what are chances of 4G?

Apologies for the generalisations there.

CEO Tim Cook: Apple retail stores are 'like Prozac' to me

Thomas 4

In fairness

I meant to edit both of these into the original post.

Windows Phone is the archtypal gold digger. She's managed to sink her claws into a moderately rich old man that's lonely but she seethes with envy that she's not one of the popular or fashionable types.

iOS is part of one of those smug self satisfied couples that you know will just be together forever and a day and sneers at all the lesser mortals. They're successful but that doesn't necessarily equate to everyone liking them.

Thomas 4
IT Angle

A metaphorical near miss

Ann Droid as a publisher doesn't really work as a metaphor. Ann Droid as a woman of ill repute does. She "flirts" with everyone and anything these days, is cheap and rumoured to carry nasties.

Apple tech FOUND ON ANDROID: Passbook gets pay-by-bonk

Thomas 4

I really wish...

...that I could use my NFC phone as my Oyster card. I suspect a lot of other folks do too. Oh in the grand scheme of things it wouldn't make a world of difference but it'd certainly save plastic and whatever metals are used to make the NFC chip in the Oyster card.

Kiwi cops to buy 6,500 iPhones, 3,900 iPads

Thomas 4

Re: "each cop gains 30 minutes of time a day"

#AboutToArrestTheGuyWatchingThisFeed

Sorry, I have no idea how Twitter actually works >.>

Fashionably slate

Thomas 4

Re: I want dumb TVs

Seconded. I want an idiot box.

Nokia's Elopocalypse two years on: Has Microsoft kept its side of the bargain?

Thomas 4

Hmmm

I just bought a Lumia 820 last weekend and I'm quite pleased with it so far. The interface is fast and responsive. and the phone itself has a pleasing solidity that's been lacking in my previous handsets. More applications need to take advantage of the Live Tile feature though. I understand Live tile is supposed to function in a similar fashion to widgets in Android but aside from providing shortcuts, they don't seem to offer much else. I'm still getting used to the phone so I might have missed something.

Journo says Elon Musk apologized for Tesla battery fiasco

Thomas 4

Re: An idea springs to mind

Ninja'd by an entire goddamn Reg article. Wow.

Thomas 4

An idea springs to mind

To get around the whole charging point thing, why not just have wireless charging built in to the parking spot? No need for adapters or power cables that way. =)

Thomas 4

Re: Yes but

I think electric cars have potential for those that live in cities for short frequent trips to work and back, or going across town. I'd be a little dubious about taking even the very latest one on a long trip (say London to Wales or even further). The only catch with that is that London has pretty good public transport compared to some of the other places I've lived, thus rendering an electric car somewhat pointless. =/

Plus I don't have a garage, so I'd need the world's most monster extension lead to reach the car park next to my flat.

El Reg contemplates the ultimate cuppa

Thomas 4

Re: I must defend American coffee drinkers

I went to stay with an American friend a few months back and she made me a coffee. It was divine. She uses a locally grown bean and goes to all the extra lengths of grinding it herself, using filter papers and the net result is like drinking dark silk. <3

Of course, when I got back to Blightly and had Costa Coffee from my local shop it tasted like poison. So essentially she ruined coffee for me. =(

Thomas 4

Re: On second thoughts

Rich tea, or one of those Millie's Cookies that are the size of a dustbin lid with chocolate chips like bricks.

Thomas 4

Re: Assam only

My perfect tea is also Assam:

0) Get a large mug and I do mean a large mug. I like my tea delicious and in gargantuan quantities. Tea cups are for folks that want to sample different blends of tea, rather than brewing a drink. Besides, Assam is the way to go. Samples are unnecessary.

1) Boil a kettle and make sure the water is *actually* boiling, not lukewarm.

2) Add *two* bags of Twining's Assam tea to the mug. The double bag ensures a rich strong flavour permeates all through the water but more importantly does so *rapidly*, so that you don't lose heat while waiting for the flavour to build in strength.

3) Add the boiling water to the mug. Ensure space for a small amount of milk.

4) Add one or two teaspoons of sugar depending on the gargantuan-ness of the mug.

5) Stir the tea bags in a circular motion at first and once the water starts to darken, then squeeze the tea bags with the spoon, probably no longer than about 30/45 seconds worth of stirring.

6) Remove the bags and add the milk. Ideal colour should be a slightly-pale tan. If it's starting to look even remotely white, you've screwed up.

7) Sit at desk and enjoy. Feel free to make contented slurping sounds if it will irritate the asshole working next to you.

Pro tip: Never, ever add the milk before the boiling water. If you do this, it causes the tea leaves in the bag to clump together and you lose most of the flavour. Don't ask me why it does this, it just does.

NASA melts mysterious 'metal Martian flower' myth

Thomas 4

Re: Who?

amanfrommars1, obviously.

Time to rid ourselves of the tech channel zombies

Thomas 4

Re: Nice article!

Hmmm, I'm going to take a stab in the dark and say Thorntons. You see lots of their bars and boxes in Tesco and WH Smith, so why do they need their own independent shops? Anything that they can't do via their partners they could convert into an online business like Montezumas.

But we shouldn't fret about the loss of another High Street chain. After all it's been at *least* 50 metres since I walked passed a Costa or Starbucks - that's prime shopfront space going to waste there.

Public told to go to hell, name Pluto's two new moons

Thomas 4

Could do with something really classical

Dante and Virgil?

Named after the The Divine Comedy, rather than the Devil May Cry series.

Montana TV warns of ZOMBIE ATTACK in epic prank hack

Thomas 4
Unhappy

This was an extremely cruel joke

You raised Max Brook's hopes and then utterly destroyed them, all in the space of an hour. Bravo!

Thomas 4

Re: The government are VERY worried about zombies...

Bloody zombies, rising up from the ground, taking our jobs and claiming benefits....>:(

</ DailyMail>

New Zealand court hands out second peppercorn downloading penalty

Thomas 4
IT Angle

With logic like this, this could be really successful

I have a 40Mb fibre optic line at home. What on earth do I need such a large amount of bandwidth for?

"It must be piracy".

I have a tower PC with two 1Tb hard drives. What on earth do I need such a large amount of space for?

"It must be piracy".

I have BitTorrent installed on my computer. Why on earth would I need such a program?

"It must be piracy".

I have a computer. Why on earth would I have such a device?

"Release the lawyers!"

Illicit phone rings in Sri Lankan inmate's back crack

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Thought exercise for the day

Well, if one was going to go into prison and needed to conceal a mobile phone, which would be best suited to the task? Things to consider:

* Size

* Battery life

* Rounded corners

* Ease of cleaning

I'd probably go with either one of the early Series 60 Nokias. Other strong candidates for rectal phonage include the Sony Ericsson T68i (just make sure the camera and MP3 accesories aren't attached!) or possibly the Sendo X.

HP clamps down on student labor in Chinese factories

Thomas 4

It's not a pretty picture, is it?

Someone's got to pay for the technology we want. We just don't want it to be us.

Paper computers: Not mere pulp fiction

Thomas 4

A paper-based computer could work

You draw a 1 on one side of a sheet and a 0 on the other. Might take up a wee bit of room though and every time there's a gust of wind the system crashes.

'You get burned out on Facebook after a while'

Thomas 4

Cillit Bang

Named after the sound an exploding server makes?

Looking for some Windows Phone advice =)

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Looking for some Windows Phone advice =)

Good morning El Reg,

I could use a little guidance with regards to getting a new phone tomorrow. I've settled on Windows Phone 8 as my OS of choice (I politely ask that we refrain from discussing Android / iOS / Tizen / BB10) but I'm uncertain as to which type of Windows Phone I should go for.

My two front runners are the Lumia 820 and 920. I like the cheaper price, Micro SD and changeable covers on the 820 but the tank like quality of the 920, combined with the high quality camera is also a big draw. For those that have used either of them, I'd love to hear your experiences of them. The poor battery life on the 820 is a concern, the hefty price tag of the 920 is another.

The other alternative is the HTC Windows Phone but I confess I don't know much about them. Is the build quality likely to be the same as the Nokia phones? Is there a considerably better battery life with the HTCs?

I'm also free from the hellish clutches of Vodafone so now I need to decide who I'm going to leap into bed with for the next 24 months - Three or 4GEEOrangeWhatevertheHellTheyreCalled?

If anyone can offer me some advice with regards to these, I'd really appreciate it!

Earth-like planets abound in red dwarf systems

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Re: Entropy: Big Problem!

Neat! Learned a little bit about deep sea marine photosynthesis this morning. Not bad for a tech website.

Ubuntu for Galaxy Nexus phones to arrive in February

Thomas 4

Re: This would be good

Weren't there a couple of Android attempts at something like this? The Padfone and something that Motorola put out?