* Posts by Evil Auditor

2630 publicly visible posts • joined 13 Jan 2009

Serendipitous discovery nets security researcher $70k bounty

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Now may also be a good time for Booz Allen to consider changes to its hiring process.

Rather time to consider changes to its DLP processes. More often than new hires it's longer-term and formerly gruntled employees who commit criminal acts against their employer.

BOFH: We're an industry leader … in employing idiot managers

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Re: Industry Leaders

TL:DR but haven't come across amanfrommars 1 in quite a while. Which must mean: I don't spend enough time at El Reg...

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Re: Industry Leaders

Surely very much second in that regard to a certain blue chicken coop.

That'd rather be the industry leader in firing staff indiscriminately and then having to close shop completely because no one's left who knew how the termination procedure worked.

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Re: Shut up already!

Sometimes this is not even required. As in a former life when I learnt about the company being sold. There was a non-private appointment in the boss' calendar which took place off-site and involved the CEO, CFO, L&C, and a law firm specialised in M&A... (And yes, my access to that calendar was licit)

Just follow the instructions … no wait, not that instruction to lock everyone out of everything

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Why do you care what other people drink, eh?

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Agreed. But before understanding it needs to read it. Don't think mine would at that time and state.

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At 3am my brain's so low on caffeine that it entered a vegetative state. So, for it to start it needs strong tea in sizable quantity, which takes time to prepare - that's before I'd even be able to locate the laptop let alone its VPN connection. And that's why I better don't do on call.

Worried about your datacenter carbon footprint? Why not put it in orbit?

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Holmes

On the plus side: no worries about fires or flooding and neither much about intruders.

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Re: A daft idea

Pointy-Haired Boss: "I want our data and stuff in the cloud."

"But... it already is?! We use Azure for this, AWS for that, and PhantasiCloud for all the rest."

"Okay, and where is it, I mean physically?"

"Well, there's one data centre in Ohio, another location in the Netherlands, and and and..."

"No, you don't understand (are you stupid, or what?), I want it IN THE CLOUD! My golf/fsck/whatever buddies tell me that they all put there stuff there and it's much better. So put it IN THE CLOUD, no matter what it costs!"

"M'kay, I'll see what I can do..."

Run a demo on live data? Sure! What could possibly go wrong? Hang on. Are you sure that's not working?

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Re: Checklists!

On the interwebs no one knows you're a horse. Until now, that is.

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A Swiss authority investigating a Swiss pilot flying a plane of a Swiss airline into the soil of a Swiss hill... But Helvetica, I believe, it is not. Although I just found that this font is no longer installed in my work computer and hence cannot verify.

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Re: Checklists!

Why didn't your friend use theirs?

Moderately experienced pilots tend to be at highest risk of jumping the checklist.They are certainly no beginners anymore and develop an overconfidence: "I know what I do!"

What it was in this case, I certainly do not know but I really wanted to reply to a dog replying to a cat.

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That was, unfortunately, many years before Youtube.

But here you'll find the Investigation Report, see section 1.5.1.4.2 Unintentional retraction of the landing gear on the ground on page 24. And yes, that report was not about the unintentional retraction but about the unintentional touching the ground with sudden deceleration done about ten years later by the same pilot.

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"ohnosecond"

Reminds me of the flight instructor who bet his students that it is not possible to retract the landing gear while on the ground. One Saab 340 was totalled in the process.

KFC bot urges Germans to mark Kristallnacht with cheesy chicken

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...KFC said, its internal review process wasn't followed...

I tend to rather believe that their review process was indeed followed as designed. But the meatsacks who approved the message had no feckin' clue what the Reichskristallnacht is. "Es klingt so schön romantisch..."

Musk tells of risk of Twitter bankruptcy as tweeters trash brands

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Same surprise here. But as someone much cleverer than I am once said: never underestimate a man who overestimates himself.

Go ahead, be rude. You don't know it now, but it will cost you $350,000

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Re: You get what you order

That is one of the great things* of my employer: I get full support for firing or not accepting clients that I don't want to work with.

*no, not everything is great - cf. another of my comments within this section.

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Re: You get what you order

Absolutely. One of the best things is when someone phones and wants to bring their business because of a recommendation. All we have to do is not to fsck up. Well, and if something goes pear-shaped, fess up and correct.

It also goes the otherway: when I stop doing business with crappy clients and put them on our black list.

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Coat

Re: Now ask me why ...

Cornish, Scottish? I find your comment slightly discriminatory.

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Devil

Crappy support? Unfortunately, I cannot change our own IT department.

Look! Up in the sky! Proof of concept for satellites beaming energy to Earth!

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Microwaves, the ESA notes, operate at a non-ionizing frequency that won't cause cellular damage

The dead cat in my microwave oven tends to disagree. Seriously though, 2GW spread over 10 square kilometers is in the same order as regular solar radiation on European soil, on a sunny winter day. Or did I miscalculate something here? I'm slightly underwhelmed by the fact that this microwave beam wouldn't even heat my porridge.

Unlucky for some: Meta chops 13% of global workforce

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Re: Two things...

A certain ex-chancellor being fired by a now ex-prime minister comes to mind...

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Couldn't agree more.

But to be fair with Zuck, he probably doesn't have the slightest clue what responsibility means.

Tired: Data scientists. Wired: Data artists

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Re: Poor models

Well, call me uninformed but how can data scientist do any meaningful work without having a thorough understanding of the real world?

Catching a falling rocket with a helicopter more complex than it sounds, says Rocket Lab

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Facepalm

Re: Which is it?

While I tend to agree with you, it didn't help that my brain read "catching a falling rock with a helicopter" and thought someone completely lost their mind to describe a rocket as a rock. Oh well

University of Edinburgh staff paid late due to Oracle ERP troubles

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In June 20191582, Oracle announced the university was moving to the Cloud.

Funny that even more than 400 years ago this sentence would have made some sort of sense. Mind you, uttering that back then might have caused terrible consequences. Terrible as in: thrown in the loch with hands and feet bound to see whether you float or drown.

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Facepalm

Re: 8-{ Wot, no migration planning?

see icon, 'nuff said.

Elon Musk reportedly outlines horrible Twitter layoff process

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Devil

Re: I've never used it but...

Hey, I'm an auditor. It's my job to have an opinion on stuff that I don't use and don't know how to use. Pays pretty well.

Crowds not allowed to leave Shanghai Disneyland without a negative COVID test

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Re: I would have thought it was impossible

...if "Zero COVID" is indeed an effective policy...

As Fr. Ted Crilly very accurately quoted 1984China's Communist Party Book, it's been decided long ago that the policy is indeed effective and therefore it is. That is the truth and anything else is ridiculous and implausible and who says otherwise is obviously insane and will be treated in suitable institutions for their own good.

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Boffin

Re: Trying to escape IKEA

Ever since I figured that it's easier not to enter an IKEA than to leave it, my life improved considerably.

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Coat

Re: I would have thought it was impossible

...I would have thought it was an impossible target.

As it turns out, and China keeps demonstrating, it is an impossible target. The problem (i.e. one of the problems) there is, the governing structure is unable to admit a mistake and must continue with whatever inept decision was taken in the first place. Anyhow, this is obviously only my totally unfounded opinion, and see icon.

The world was promised 'cloud magic'. So much for that fairy tale

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Re: Are you saying ....

You and you and many others, too. To no avail.

Minecraft's 'first luxury goods collection' features real-world $3,000 Burberry coat

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Must have been a freaking inflation rate in the U.S.of A.! 1'000$ for ahoodie?!

InSight Mars lander has only 'few weeks' of power left

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Re: Use inclined solar panels

I use a hose to rinse off the dust...

And this is exactly why they are so eager to find water on Mars.

Your next PC should be a desktop – maybe even this Chinese mini machine

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Re: DisplayPort in 2003?

Jep, but not in 2003 - while HDMI was around but not very common (DVI was, though), DP still took a few year before seeing daylight.

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Holmes

DisplayPort in 2003?

HDMI to DisplayPort cable (which I have no recollection of acquiring) that snakes a short distance from the PC's second HDMI port to drive an ancient Dell 13" LCD monitor (that I do recall acquiring in 2002 or 2003)

DisplayPort's not a typo on the front page, but some sort of typo nevertheless.

Nvidia RTX 4090: So hot they're melting power cables

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When I dump some crap, I flush it with water, perfect potable water where I live. What a waste! Shall I also get government approval for taking a shit?!

India's – and Infosys's – favorite son-in-law Rishi Sunak is next UK PM

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Re: Counting?

You won't find me saying anything positive about Corbyn. Well, except that he's no longer leader of the Labour party. But your comment is spot on!

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Devil

Re: Can't be right.

Biden or Sunak?

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Re: Talking points

You may be right. And no doubt, it did play a part amoungst some Tory members. Although, I'd like to believe his losing against Truss was mostly because of his involvement in BoJo's exit. Anyhow, I was more referring to what I heard -or rather didn't hear- in public debate during his campaign.

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Re: Talking points

I had been positively surprised that Sunak's origin and colour of his skin weren't an issue during his "ramp-up"* to become PM. I even caught myself thinking what a mature society this is. Well, and probably it's again only my very limited perception, now I get the impression that left and right it's always been a big issue, just kept under the rug for a little while - anything for «look, how feckin progressive we are!» to «we're never going to win the next general election with a non-white boy as PM».

* yesterday, we could clearly see that he wasn't fully operating yet. Sure, reading capabilities were up and running. But not much else. SCNR

Data loss prevention emergency tactic: keep your finger on the power button for the foreseeable future

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Only reading this, the pain kept creeping back into my index finger - a numb finger from feeling a button that seems to be pushing back with increasing strength, And slowly losing the sense of how much of a push is really needed to keep the button pressed....

Yes, been there, pushed that, and simultaneously heard «DON'T!!!» It wasn't the NHS though, only some local server for the CAD. What I cannot remember though is whether is was a colleague or my own brain who shouted the «don't».

Liz Truss ousted as UK prime minister, outlived by online lettuce

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Re: If a mistake is bad enough ...

You've got a point there. If the Tories continue with the exponentially increasing incompetence of party leaders, the next prime minister will likely be a fucking ixodida (although, that does sound a bit unfair towards ticks).

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Re: If a mistake is bad enough ...

Totally agree.

Tories, though, are not unrivelled in their incompetence. Just to name one Corbyn and I could mention more of them, too.

Just $10 to create an AI chatbot of a dead loved one

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Would you pay $10 to create an AI chatbot to talk again to a dead loved one?

First confusing thought, early morning: why would I pay an AI that talks to dead people?! Urgent need of strong tea.

Nvidia admits mistake, 'unlaunches' 12GB RTX 4080

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Re: I don't believe it

Unlaunch Meta? I find its forthcoming crash landing more satisfying... (wishful thinking)

Boffins grow human brain cells to play Pong

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Re: I'm old

Pong? I get at blank stare* from my staff when I mention Win95.

* not in horror, just a clueless blank stare.

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Pint

Re: Does no-one read science fiction any more?

Though I'm not sure what they promised the cells in return for cooperation?

Booze, obviously.