* Posts by jai

2310 publicly visible posts • joined 8 May 2007

'Alien' lifeform wakened from 120,000 year Arctic slumber

jai

and yet...

...across the gulfs of space, microbes superior to ours regarded this Earth with envious eyes, and slowly, and surely, they drew their plans against us.....

jai

take off...

...and nuke the site from orbit! it's the only way to be sure

iPhone owners are superior beings, says survey

jai

another statistic

as this comments page shows, the vast majority of non-iPhone owners are loud, vociferous and above all jealous, but unwilling to admit it

Tube Deluxe 3.1

jai

re: And you need this ... why?

i'll give you perfect example why apps like this are useful

yesterday i was traveling in to London, my overground train was taking me to St Pancress. I wanted to go to Regent St, and so checked the Tube map on the London Tube app on my iPhone.

This map allowed me to work out that when I reached St Pancress, I should take the Victoria Line.

As you say, I could have worked this out for myself once I reach St Pancress and made my way to the Underground station, but what I was also able to do was check the status of the Underground lines and I discovered that the Victoria line was suspended all day due to engineering works.

So i checked the map again and re-planned my route to use the Picadilly and Central lines instead - having confirmed that both of those were working with a good service.

Software to turn iPhones, Pres into virtual pens grabs award

jai

why?

i can't see when this would ever be more useful than just opening a Notes app and typing using a keyboard (viritual or real)

Zaphod Beeblebrox home sun 'shrinking', may have blown up

jai

well..

...i for one welcome our froody overlord-dudes who always know were their towels are

AT&T squeezes wannabe iPhone upgraders

jai

contracts

the point is, O2 forced us into these 18 month subsidised contracts. there was no option to be an early adopter last year without buying into the subsidy contract.

personally, i'm going to get a PAYG 3GS if i can - that way I can detach the hardware from the mobile phone contract. leaves me free to upgrade to the 2010 iPhone next summer if i wish instead of being bound in another O2 contract until 2011.

that said - my 18 month contract means i'll have paid 790 quid for my 3G phone (including the subsidised cost)

so by comparison, the cost of a PAYG phone saves me at least 200 quid in the long run

Apple punts batterylicious MacBook Pros

jai

re: So the 'macbook' line is looking rather empty

the worry is that the gap in the MacBook line would be very nicely filled with an iTablet

only, instead of coming in gorgeous aluminium, it'll be white plastic to match the laptop :(

Man creates third-gen iPhone rumours picture

jai

iPhone bingo

excellent - we get to print this out now and watch the Keynote and the first person to get all the items of one colour can yell out BINGO in the middle of the keynote :)

Microsoft uncloaks invisible XBox controller

jai

fail gadget is fail

so.... how exactly does this help me play Halo3 or CoD any better?

Jobs sighted, reality distortion field primed for WWDC?

jai
Jobs Halo

RDF in full effect

i'm already getting too excited to sleep and there's still so long to go until the show

i'd assumed that Apple had found a way to synthesize the RDF and had got it running early, but now i realise, with 6 months out of action, He's obviously just flexing and exercising his RDF muscles, limbering up, ready for the WWDC

'Supermodel' glow-in-the-dark pocket monkeys created

jai

it's just the begining....

it seems a bit like the start of the Hulk movie, next they'll be splicing the monkeys with startfish to give them regeneration abilities and so on

so cool!

i for one welcome our glow-in-the-dark primate overlords

Google toys with plug-in free YouTube

jai

re: Yes, please

and i'd love to see a flash-free The Register

there's nothing more annoying that to see my browser freeze while loading the page, and i know it's nothing other than a poxy advert that i don't want to see anyway that is causing it

Microsoft announces Zune HD

jai
Jobs Halo

feel guilty

i quite like the styling of that

but why would the font on the menu be so big? even if it's a prototype build, it doesn't make sense that the font would be so large

and if it's a promotional, artists impression, you'd spend a few minutes in photoshop to fix that

and who has such text-orientated menus these days anyway? all main menus are large icons, small text, because that way people can see more options

if that is the main interface method, then you'd best hope there isn't any App Store equivalent as it'll take you all day to scroll through 30 apps, let alone the 80 apps i have on my iphone

Summer debut for Judge Dredd computer smart-rifle

jai

but where is

the "double whammy" ammo that he uses in the film to great effect?

and is it compulsory, after using this weapon, to stand up and shout "I AM.... THE LAW!!!"

Apple counts $1bn for mystery data center

jai
Flame

@nate

ODFO

Apple Schmucki to sue over fake iPods

jai
Jobs Halo

odd ritual??

what's the odd Swiss ritual then?

that looked just the same as all the Apple store openings i've been to in the UK

Sony eyes smile, smirk-controlled music phone

jai

another technically impressive idea that's utterly useless

the amount of people that i see, listening to music on their phone, while staring at the phone's screen the whole time is..... well, it's none actually

everyone starts playing the album or playlist, then shoves the phone in their pocket and either goes back to sleep on the train or carries on walking to work

if i'm listening to music while at my desk, the phone is face-up on the desk, i'm not holding it in front of me.

so i don't see how this device is ever going to get a chance to see what a person's face looks like apart from the 2 seconds when something rubbish gets played and i'm already reaching for the skip track button

Spielberg: Games consoles doomed

jai

VR games

when i were a wee lad in late 80s and early 90s, they had these VR arcades in the Trocadero at Leicester Sq (that's in London, England for you sceptics)

and during the summer holidays, we'd inevitably make the pilgramage to London a couple of times to see whatever the big blockbuster movie was, check out what was new on CD in HMV and play on the arcades. These VR machines looked awesome - took up the space of 4 arcades each, there were big queues for them, and each game cost 5 times what it would cost to play Street Fighter 2 or Bonanza Bros.

and we queued and we paid and we played

and we weren't terribly impressed - driving tanks around and shooting at each other, was different, sitting in a machine, but the game itself was a bit poor and a bit dull

the next year they had stand up ones, where you turned around and pushed on button on the 'gun' to move forward and the other to fire the weapon at the other players

graphics weren't much and again, the game was boring to play

i haven't seen any VR games since then. I'm sure in nearly 20 years they must have come on in leaps and bounds, after all, the quality of console games has. except, i don't see them anywhere.

who goes to arcades anymore? we're all playing our PS3s and Xbox360s instead. and if VR gaming really is the future, surely it'll start on consoles - so we should have them here now with VR peripherals

while i'm skeptical about the whole "thin-client" cloud gaming anyway - i can see that it is a possibility - although we'll be playing on our Playstation thin-client or our xBox thin-client, not a Speilberg one.

but VR gaming has died a well deserved death, hasn't it?

Amazon juices Kindle iPhone app

jai

re: Give me paper anyday

i'm going to stick with Stanza then until they get the Kindle app upto the same standard

but like OrsonX - it's going to be a while before i'll give up reading books in their traditional format - there's something about reading a book and turning the paper pages that the electronic versions are missing - it's like they've taken the soul out of reading and sterilized it

Palm Pre to sell like hot cakes, Sprint CEO proclaims

jai

@ Will Re: Still no news...

did you not read the article? Palm do not have a version of the Pre that'll work on the UK networks. It will only run on the US network. Therefore, no UK launch for the near future.

And if it is correct that they've only been able to manufacture so few, they they're going to have their hands full for the next 6 months or more just producing enough units to sell to US customers before they'll be able to start thinking about the rest of the world and setting up new production runs with GSM chips in them

Palm: Pré to launch on 6 June

jai
Jobs Halo

how much?

so it's 300 bucks?

so three times the price of an iPhone 3G

does it have 3 times the features?

Fox terminates The Sarah Connor Chronicles

jai

it wouldn't be so annoying...

but Fox do seem to get a lot of decent shows - and then they cancel them just as their fanbase really gets going

but is it Fox that is to blame? They are, afterall, just watching their ratings

surely the blame lies squarely with the american public for not knowing a good show when they see one - and then complaining AFTER it's axed instead of watching it when it's on telly

if less people were capping these shows and up'ing them to the interwebz then people would have to watch the shows as they broadcast and so the ratings would be higher

Debbie Gibson battles Mega Shark and Giant Octopus

jai

@ Smallbrainfield

i recon you are quite correct sir

seems to film is available via the nefarious parts of teh interwebz and a look a thumbnail preview image of the film shows 20 still images taken spaced evenly throughout the film - only the 19th one shows a bit of shark - no sign of the octopus though

Motorola waves in gesture-sensitive phone

jai

doesn't make things easier

having to shake, flip and jerk your phone around doesn't make it easier to do. it's far quicker and easier to just use your thumb to press the cancel button to skip a call, or tap the screen to start an application

this is why no one likes motorolla phones anymore

whatever "innovative" ideas they have are stupid and useless - they don't add appeal to the phone, they take it away

Snow Leopard, Jobs to miss Apple geekfest

jai

interesting

this is interesting, because there's been some theories that there are elements of Snow Leopard that haven't been in the beta releases so far

could be that this Final Dev Preview will contain these and they'll use the WWDC keynote as a way of showing them off

Fanbois squeal over Mac OS X upgrade

jai

re: YAY!!!!!11oneone

really Mr O'Brien, is that the best you can do? epic fail

bring back Webster Phreaky, at least that dude but some thought and effort into his trollin'

Playboy to take on World of Warcraft with Bunny-themed MMORG

jai

epic fail is epic

surely this has fail written all over it, no?

as a game, it's going to fail, because it's going to be everything that a MMORPG should not be. if it'll be playable on the phone or in the office that suggests the gameplay will consist of "go meet agent, perform on casting couch, go do photoshoot, appear on Howard Stern show..." horribly linear step-by-step "quests" with sod-all form of character leveling and gaining exp.

as you correctly point out, the hoards of gaming freaks that are addicted to WoW and Eve etc will find nothing challenging here. this is pretty much going to end up like the Sims with hot birds. In fact, didn't they already do a Playboy Mansion game that was like the Sims in lingerie?

and for the one-handed fap brigade it's just going to be pointless. they'll be too frustrated at having to go through the games hoops to get their reward that they'll just give up and download some hardcore donkey action from the pirate bay instead

that said - it does present an awesome opportunity for plenty of jokes and innuendos by merging gaming and rpg terms with the world of Playboy bunnies

now if you'll excuse me, i'm off for a grind with Miss February before i ding to the next level up

ModBook Mac tablet turns up in Blighty

jai

Re: A few things...

agreed, that's an ugly mofo piece of hardware

i think i'd rather wait to see what piece of pure sex design Apple's engineers turn up instead

still - i do like the idea and I think OS X is the idea OS for a touch screen interface

that, and I'd love to play EveOnline on a tablet

Apple bars 2.0 code from App Store

jai
Jobs Halo

re: Wow & @Rik_Myslewski

yes - it's next month

@ Rik :

"Apple bars 2.0 code from App Store" and "iPhone 3.0 or nothing" are not actually true, are they? your being a tad tabloid and sensationalist here

all apps will need to be 3.0 compatible, yes, but there's nothing stopping them from being 2.0 compatible also

you're headlines make it sound like anyone who doesn't upgrade to 3.0 won't be able to download any apps going forward.

Arnie pops up in Terminator Salvation

jai

only 6.5??

if it only warranted 6.5 then that's very dispointing

i think perhaps i'll just watch the original one at the weekend instead then

Duke Nukem Forever developer defunct, says staffer

jai

Nukem 'till they glow, then shoot 'em in the dark!

"Duke Nukem Forever, probably the best known example of vapourware in PC gaming, may now never be completed"

Last decade just called, they want their news back!

but if Take2 own the rights, perhaps they can give the franchise to Rockstar to complete. R* are certainly capable of the right humour

Virgin Media pilots 200Mbit service

jai

yes please!!!

although, they haven't even gotten around to making the 50meg service available in my neck of hertfordshire yet, so gawd knows if they'll ever manage to give us this

but if they do, i want it

if it gives me some anti-lag advantage while playing Eve, then it's all worth it

and besides, if i don't have it, i'm gonna get pwned by some git who does have 200meg and blasts me when i lag

actually - does this make the whole dubious OneLive thing a little bit more plausable?

Star Trek Klingon lingo hits cutting room floor

jai

re: Losing the nerd facor

ODFO

Apple medical leave halts Jobsian jet-setting

jai

more likely

he's gotten himself sucked into some MMO like WoW or EVE and hasn't left the house for months as he's too busy grinding away, mining for metal

Go, Brown, go!

jai

re: Schoolboy error?

"That's a campaign for an infinite loop (which might have been the intention)."

you mean, like a divide-by-zero-error?

(and there's your IT Angle for all you lot complaining about the lack of relevance of this article)

:-)

jai

politics

surely, El Reg is just generally anti-politics - i don't see this as a pro-Tory article, it's just anti-establishment like most of the rest of the articles. if Cameron were in power, there'd be the same article about him, no?

Revealed: Mega City One's top e-car - according to Peugeot

jai

OMFG i want!!!

cannot adequately put into words how much i want to drive that thing

it's awesome

however, living in the UK, i'm concerned that when it rains here, it is very rarely vertical - even a small bit of wind and you're gonna end up wet driving that

still - by the time this goes into production, global warming will have evapourated the seas and chances of rain will be negligable

Apple eyes patent for web silence

jai

re: @"in Vista? oh really?"

but obviously Microsoft haven't got a patent for it - if they developed this function for Vista before then, surely they'd have patented it first?

but also Apple thought of this in 2007

yet i do not see it in Safari yet - not even the betas for version4

so were they waiting for the patent to become public before implementing it? or more likely, it's just another Apple patent that's never going to be turned into anything the user gets to use

jai

in Vista? oh really?

that is interesting, cos Apple filed the patent in November 2007

so can Apple now sell the patent to some two-bit pointless company in Texas who'll then sue Microsoft for every version of Vista under the sun... oh that's right, there aren't many so it's not worth it

AT&T reveals slipping iPhone sales

jai
Coat

re: How Much

i'd be surprised if it was just 10%

i think Apple a well aware that there's a recession, but they're equally aware that some of us will make the cuts in our yearly spending elsewhere (like food and heating) before we're prepared to consider not getting the latest model of iphone

mines the one with the RDF glow

Google splits with Mozilla on 3D interwebs

jai

re: Tried the plugin

Oh yeah, if it proved to be a better alternative to Flash, that'd be good

but i fear that it's being developed to make online 3d texas hold'em websites.

Apple rides fanbois to popularity crown (again)

jai
Jobs Halo

"more intuitive and pleasurable to use"

not just for the average Joe and Jane, as you put it, but also those of us who know what we're doing with a computer seem to prefer them too

iPhone beta OS cracks before release

jai

a little foolhardy

to release the crack for the 3.0 while it's still in beta, no?

this isn't going to be the final beta and it's certainly not going to be the build that gets released, so all they have done is shown Apple a couple of the holes they've missed. which Apple will fix

Pirate Bay fans: Lay off our neo-Nazi Sugar Daddy

jai

adblocker

so if we visit TPB but will all the adblocker plug-ins enable and images switched off and so on, so we are sure to avoid being shown any advertising, are we safe to assume we're not support those nazi scum?

it's far easier just to go to usenet i think

Google nabs purse snatcher

jai

re: The Real Story

I agree - sounds suspiciously convenient for Google that this story suggests the Latitude service actually can be useful. more like a dogey advertising scam to my mind

Researchers dissect world's first Mac botnet

jai

Re Mac Owned / Re Shock and Awe

so there's one botnet exploit on OS X

ONE

how many are there on windows? even if those 20,000 macs are infected and spamming DOS attacks, that's a drop in the ocean compared to the damage being done by infected windows machines

Wanted: Creative spark for iPhone games

jai

@John

killer apps on the Wii? which ones, exactly?

i don't know any serious games players that carry on using their Wii after 2 months of owning it. they all switch back to the real games on their 360 or ps3

Fourth antivirus firm buys into behavioural blocking

jai

re re 8e6?

and microsoft - micro implies small, soft implies flexible - and how many gigabytes does it take to install windows?

or maybe the OP is a penguin abuser - because Linux (or SuSE or Fedora etc etc) are perfectly reasonable names aren't they?

it's a good job we're not all so xenophobic about strange sounding names, eh Mr Ettel?

Teens reject Microsoft's Zune

jai

new zune?

rumours are that there'll be a new Zune coming soon, aimed at competing against the iPod Touch - big hd screen and.... that's about it

maybe they'll make it so you can run windows mobile apps on it as a way of compensating for the AppStore.

somehow, i can't really see it doing much to dent the Touch's marketshare either. but i'm sure M$ have a cunning plan, they'll probably roll out their ingenious Apple Tax theories (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/04/11/microsoft_flames_macs/) to convince people to get a Zune