* Posts by Stevie

7282 publicly visible posts • joined 12 Jun 2008

Schrödinger's cat explained with neutrinos

Stevie

Bah!

Yesyesyes, the cat, good.

Now explain Schrodinger's haircut. What, did he lose a bet pr something?

Dying! Yahoo! writes! off! half! of! the! $1bn! it! paid! for! Tumblr!

Stevie

Bah!

A four hundred and eighty two dollar write down doesn't seem excessive to me. I spent more than that on Amazon this year buying useless tat.

Hardball hacker thrown in the cooler for 46 months for guessing rival team's password

Stevie

Re: Adam 1 clearly this much more evil than

My memory of the SubPrime Fiasco is slightly different:

The dodgy loans from many, many sources (including Fannie Mae and Freddy Mac but not by any means limited to them) were bundled by banks into instruments that were then fraudulently represented as solid investment vehicles by colluding with the SEC in a blatantly illegal fixing of the system.

Then said banks colluded to work an insurance scam under the blanket term Credit Default Swap. Not illegal mostly, on account of the deregulation begun under Reagan and continued by every President since having created holes you could drive a bus through.

No, those in charge of the banks did nothing illegal (at least, nothing that can be proved) when they bet against themselves, but what they did was unethical and downright stupid, bringing the nation's (and eventually the world's) economic engine to the brink of absolute failure. Treason might be a word to be tossed about here, given that the officers of the nation's superbanks are supposed to understand they have the stewardship of the economy, and that includes protecting it as well as exploiting it for personal gain.

But if you want me to believe that "President" Bush (does anyone believe he was the one running the country rather than the old guy with the oversized safe in his office?) had a grasp of the financial situation his ship of state was sailing, I'm going to need to be administered some very strong drugs of the hypnotic/psychedelic family before being locked in the machine from The Ipcress File for a week.

Opera sells open-source Chromium browser for $600m to Chinese bods

Stevie

Re: Good one !

The US regulators are worried that people will have too much privacy.

UK's climate change dept abolished, but 'smart meters and all our policies strong as ever'

Stevie

Bah!

All this means is that the current 3.6 million meters will have to be swapped out for post-Brexit-law compliant ones sometime in the next few years.

Like when they change my water, gas and electric companies.

"But I already *have* a smart meter".

"Not one of ours you don't".

OpenSSH has user enumeration bug

Stevie

Bah!

Ten kilobyte password?

How about just using a simple "more than X characters and you are obviously a fucking Chechnyan Phishbot" rule to bounce the tactic? Pick X to be reasonable for your users and away you go?

Gordon Bennet.

Dear Tesla, stop calling it autopilot – and drivers are not your guinea pigs

Stevie

Re: Do we want to advance or not? 4 checkri

Tesla safety risk: a soundbite answer to a question involving dozens of complex variables. It completey evades the driver's risk of adopting a more relaxed attitude to situational awareness because "the autopilot has it covered".

The comment regarding accident stats connecting seat belt usage with increased accident rates is also overly simplistic and a clear example of correlation rather than causation. I could, for example, point out that in the same time period cars began shipping with all-round disc brakes as standard, resulting in drivers using them more agressively in traffic, and turbocharging became ecconomically viable and mechanically reliable, resulting in drivers using accelleration more agressively. I know this because I Was There.

And there is a difference between a Luddite and someone who would rather their kid, raised carefully and dutifully to all the proper standards espoused by SINKS and DINKS posting on El Reg forums these days, not be killed as collateral damage when some fucktard with more money than sense doesn't RTFM or does and fails to recognize the gap between designer hyperbole and engineering reality.

The Tesla is being developed in this case as one would develop software in a post-www world when it should be being developed more traditionally with the knowledge that even fancy expensive cars can kill people, just like the conventional auto industry does. A bad driver for a flatbed scanner will ruin your day. A bad driver for the Tesla "autopilot" will ruin someone else's life.

Also: naming the feature "autopilot" invites stupid people to act stupidly. We live in a world where I dig about a car a year out of my front lawn because young people equate cruise control and automatic gearbox with "I can fiddle with center console gui stereo controls while exceeding the speed limit in perfect safety".

Stevie

Re: About the naming...

As for beta - that doesn't mean it is an untested feature that is not of sufficient quality to be rolled out. It is an indicator to people to not entirely rely on the feature.

Tell you what: you beta test your Tesla on a private road away from me, my family and friends until it isn't in Beta any more and we are good.

Until then, what is called for is a siren about as loud as those used at football matches to sound inside the Tesla's cabin whenever some twat takes his or her hands off the fucking wheel in traffic so he/she can take a selfie.

Anyone caught photoblogging from the backseat of their Tesla while beta-not-ready-for-prime-time-autopilot is in charge should be recycled for organ donation.

It's not our fault we don't hire black people, says Facebook

Stevie

Re: @Jimmy2Cows 4TeaLeaf

Newspapers?

I don't "do" Facebook, but I'd be very surprised if they didn't have a "want to work for us?" link on, you know, Facebook.

If so, job done. Links are colorblind.

Alleged Aussie plum plucker pleads guilty to motel tissue swipe

Stevie

Bah!

OW! OwowowowaaaarrrrghOW!

UK gov says new Home Sec will have powers to ban end-to-end encryption

Stevie

Bah!

Once Brexit has had its way with the economy, this law will complete the transformation of the UK into a third world police state.

I wonder how long it will be before we see the Great Atlantic Firewall come into being?

Azathoth on a bike.

Software bug costs Citigroup $7m after legit transactions mistaken for test data for 15 years

Stevie

Bah!

SEC fines customers of Citigroup. Ftfy.

Ah the SEC, so culpable in the sub-prime TITSUP, so evasive when it comes to anyone doing time for collusion.

Smartphones aren't tiny PCs, but that's how we use them in the West

Stevie

Re: Cheques???

And yet in Starbucks and Barnes & Noble and IHoP and any NY diner and any NY restaurant you'll see cash, and credit cards and debit cards being used to pay. Can't remember the last time I saw anyone so much as *try* and pass a check for their lunch or their books or their posh yuppie coffee.

Stevie

Cheques???

US financial transactions are overwhelmingly done by debit and credit cards. Cash is always an alternative. Paypal for mail xfers, though I dislike using it (it seems to be strangely popular with UK web stores for some reason, possibly due to usurious merchant account fees charged by British banks) is the norm.

But for web and face-to-face sales, credit card/debit card is the norm.

Only the Electric and Gas companies will take a check (proper US spelling since we are discussing US banking practice) and they typically process the transaction as a direct debit (the equivalent of getting a cheque cleared immediately through the aegis of the Bank of England).

Theresa or Teresa May? Twitter confuses nude model and new PM

Stevie

Re: Bah!

Oh John, you impetuous boy, I was born and raised in The Heart of England, and lived and worked there for 30 years. Even had my own consultancy when that was considered a low-class form of IT employment. Belive me, I know how The Sytem works.

Stevie

Bah!

In other news, poorly constructed headline lures readers who think that PM non-elect May doesn't know how to use Twitter.

It's 2016 and Windows lets crims poison your printer drivers

Stevie

Bah!

To borrow a phrase from the FOSS community: Found and fixed, where's the problem?

IBM scraps loyal staffer gifts in favour of... a congratulatory social page

Stevie

Bah!

So I imagine that management bonuses have been replaced by "likes" on the individuals' arsebook pages?

Why is everyone laughing?

Rolls-Royce reckons robot cargo ships are the future of the seas

Stevie

Baaaar!

We sees no dowsides, so we don't.

Yarr!

Debian founder Ian Murdock killed himself – SF medical examiner

Stevie

Re: Bah! 4 BlitheringBob

TAKE YOUR MEDS!

Stevie

Bah!

Mixing Aspberger's with an addictive personality disorder and you have the recipe for an unhappy life.

Reading the subtext it would seem that the man had few people left in his life who gave a damn, he having alienated his friends and neighbours to the point they would avoid him.

Sad. I am currently enjoying evangelizing the Pi3 as a proper work desktop computer to anyone too slow to get out of range and would have liked to thank him for doing the heavy lifting of the end-user experience.

You can’t sit there, my IoT desk tells me

Stevie

Bah!

Crikey, that leather-substitute topped desk looks like Inspector Clouseau has been playing billiards on it.

What a load of drivel stand-up desks are. I've worked in IT for over 35 years and can say without fear of knowledgeable contradiction that the desks are fine the way they are. What's needed is a new concept in chairs.

I envisage a Davros-like thing with integral karzi, wifi and Keurig. No more need one break train of thought with inconvenient trips to the bog or coffee machine (which in all likelihood will have only half-burned dregs in it because I'm the only bugger in this place who can fathom the workings of the drip coffee maker, a machine only marginally more complicated than the wheel for fuck's sake and what that says about the code you buggers are turning put doesn't bear thinking about).

What was the question?

Facebook ‘glitch’ that deleted the Philando Castile shooting vid: It was the police – sources

Stevie

Re: "I think I'll just leave this link from Not the Nine O'clock News here."

"Our government has become indistinguishable from parody"

*Looks gluimly at current presidential candidate field and the records of the Do Nothing Congress and Do Nothing Senate*

Tell me about it.

Wannabe Prime Minister Andrea Leadsom thinks all websites should be rated – just like movies

Stevie

Bah!

Where do I apply for a "ban this filth" rating for my incoherent and grammatically questionable blog? I could use the traffic.

Blighty will have a whopping 24 F-35B jets by 2023 – MoD minister

Stevie

Bah!

This use of carrier space follows closely the Long Island Rail Road's maths when designing the Hillside Service Facility, which was touted as being able to fix all the broken crap they own but actually can only cope with 1/3 of the fleet.

The Great Brain Scan Scandal: It isn’t just boffins who should be ashamed

Stevie

Bah!

So the Monsters From The Id are just a buffer overflow bug?

I'll nip down and tell them to switch off the force field and stow the death ray then.

Oracle says it is 'committed' to Java EE 8 – amid claims it quietly axed future development

Stevie

Re: Die Java Die

In the same way, JavaScript has no right to even exist (I think Lovecraft wrote about that language in "the thing on the doorstep")

You are thinking of Ambrose Bierce's The Damned Thing.

Stevie

Re: Die Java Die

If we take deloyed running code doing a real-world job as the importance metric, I believe Cobol wins the race.

Stevie

Bah!

Oracle quietly redeploying "software engineers" is just a sign that something else they sell is more broken.

Sociology student gets a First for dissertation on Kardashians

Stevie

Bah!

The Kardashians are bad for Feminism?

I'd argue otherwise but it would probably save time if I just opined that this bright young filly should not worry her little head about it all.

WIPO chief trying to 'fix the composition of the Staff Council' – lawyer

Stevie

Bah!

Nothing will suffice but that the UK hold an immediate referendum on whether to stay in this "UN" political body, whatever it is (I mean, what is it? I don't even know what it does) or assert our national sovereignty and show those johnny foreigner types what's what - and, if I may venture so bold provide a shining example to them of what real leadership looks like - by voting with our British Feet in Brexit II, The Wrath of Farage.

Australia's ABC suspends presenter over 'Wi-Fi is dangerous' claims

Stevie

Bah!

Gotta love the Smart Meter Loons bleating about having "no alternative but to relocate". Perhaps a little more attention paid to real science would have suggested the cheaper option of sheilding the back of the meter with a ground plane. The thing only needs to be read from one direction FFS.

Get ready for mandatory porn site age checks, Brits. You read that right

Stevie

Bah!

I imagine one can avoid these "age checks" by only browsing European> porn in the post-Brexit UK.

Peter Gabriel-backed music startup goes titsup, takes £500k of your money with it

Stevie

Bah!

Red ink is falling down

Red Ink

Red ink is falling down

Falling down

All over me.

You can be my wingman any time! RaspBerry Pi AI waxes Air Force top gun's tail in dogfights

Stevie

Bah!

Can it tell the difference between a civillian aircraft and a military one?

Can it differentiate between a house and a hospital?

If so then I say the Pis have it.

Vodafone hints at relocation from UK

Stevie

Bah!

Vodawho?

Gun-jumping French pols demand rapid end to English in EU

Stevie

Re: Bah!

Genders? Not if you are talking about impersonal nouns. You can call people "miss" or "sir" using a modification of the same root. Not really the same thing. Finding this out yourself would have been very easy, certainly less onerous than making sense of the average man page.

I only really suggested it to see how fast people would see the shiny and start waffling about needing yet another new artificial language.

As for cultural baggage, I think there's some confusion between that brought to the table by the language and that being touted by certain loud parties speaking it.

The language has no baggage. I quit the local Esperanto club largely because of people who were attempting to hijack the term "samideano" to much the same effect as some of the comments here. That and the claque on the other end of the scale who were denying the local culture at all costs.

The point of the language and the reason it was invented was to provide an auxillary way of communicating to the people of Warsaw, whose population had six distinct cultures each with it's own language. The idea was't original, but it was the best implementation of it to appear at that time and more people speak it today than any of the other alternatives, inclding Klingon (which steals liberally from Esperanto grammar).

Amusing aside: the Encyclopedia Britannia once had an article on Esperanto in which it stated that the language would never be adopted in the East because Chinese and Japanese people couldn't pronounce some of the letters. Which would come as a surprise to the large community of Japanese Esperantists, some of whom I've met and spoken with (they didn't speak English and I don't speak Japanese)

Stevie

Bah!

Trust the French to illustrate the sort of cash-by-the-shovelful waste projects that got the whole messy ball rolling in the first place.

How about making Esperanto the official language and having done with it? No irregular verbs, no national or cultural baggage and takes about six weeks to become fluent.

Also: most respected full immersion Esperanto school is in France.

Meet the grin reaper: Password manager now snaps login SELFIES

Stevie

Bah!

So no-one else caught the need to carry two devices around to use this on-the-go?

Parliament takes axe to 2nd EU referendum petition

Stevie

Bah!

Some 39,411 signatories came from Vatican City, even though the city state has a permanent population of only 450.

Only numerically speaking.

Cray explores options for supercomputing-as-a-service

Stevie

Bah!

Very witty subtitle, Wilde, very witty.

Ooh, if you use it to run fission sims are you doing it in the mushroom cloud?

IRS 'inadvertently' wiped hard drive Microsoft demanded in audit row

Stevie

Bah! (4 Eddy Ito)

The perceived wisdom *before* any "new rules" were enacted was to keep SEVEN years worth of tax records.

Israeli researcher fans fears: here's another way to cross the airgap

Stevie

Bah!

I have a better exploit that requires *no* access to the computer to steal passwords.

Instead the computer user is gassed through the front door keyhole by men dressed as undertakers as he or she sleeps. Then, the dwelling is broken into and a small camera embedded surgically in each of the computer user's fingertips, and connected via bluetooth to a powerful tranceiver surgically embedded next to the spleen.

The user is then partially revived, dosed with strong hypnotics and conditioned to believe his or her sore fingers came from trying to cut their fingernails in an electric pencil sharpener.

A van equipped with a receiver is positioned within range of the spleenomitter and the password read from the keycaps as they are struck.

No need to access the amchine at all.

PM resigns as Britain votes to leave EU

Stevie

Bah!

Interesting. Most of the "immigration" and "culture hijacking" comments were made in a book I just read.

"Rhubarb Rhubarb"; selected columns from the Daily Mirror by Keith Waterhouse.

He was mocking those who said such things.

The book was published in 1978.

Patriotic Brits rush into streets to celebrate… National Cream Tea Day

Stevie

Re: “tea before milk”.

Lapsang Souchong tea drinkers! Don't waste money on expensive swank tea; simply stir your PG Tips with a sliver of old railway sleeper for that smoked creosote flavour you crave!

Professor slams digital efforts of 'website-obsessed' government

Stevie

Re: Bah!

But it was done sans internet, which was the point.

Stevie

Bah!

"Before the internet no one would have set out to transform government and public administration by redesigning forms and guidance pamphlets. They would do that to make life easier for people, and save time in administration, but that's all: they wouldn't expect to alter anything else."

Bollocks. In 1985 in th US a half page tax form used by consultants to maximize shareholder value was replaced by a four page document in order to "simplify" it. Caused such a fuss the boss tax man had to come back from his holiday in the Caribbean to sort it out.

US Senate strikes down open-access FBI hacking warrant by just one honest vote

Stevie

Bah!

Good old Mitch, the only person in the game who read and memorized the rulebook, at least the "slow things to a crawl" bits of it.

The Do Nothing Senate. The Do Nothing Congress. Two chapters in a future history book. Short chapters, to be sure. So at least these lazy f*ckers will be doing something in the fight against global warming whether they believe in it or not.

Two years in and they get Tax-Payer Funded Healt Care For Life. Not a bad little con when you think about it.

Rejoice, fatties: Giving chocolate electric shocks makes it healthier

Stevie

Bah!

Scots Scientists then went on to deep fry the Mars bar and declared the results "Inconclusive, Jimmeh".

Stevie
Pint

Re: Fruit & nutcase 4 Fruit and Nutcase

I'll vote each of you a beer for that.

Drink up, Fruit.

Drink up, Nutcase.