* Posts by Stevie

7282 publicly visible posts • joined 12 Jun 2008

Startup remotely 'bricks' grumpy bloke's IoT car garage door – then hits reverse gear

Stevie

Bah!

Ban from community forum for bad language?

Well ok, but that won't end well. A timd suspnsion would have worked better, as would a coherent, thought out policy on how to deal with this inevitable situation before rolling out the product.

Turning off service? Moves the "company" (and we all know this is a one-man operation right now) i to the same part of the dickhead or not Venn Diagram as the irate customer.

Issuing an Amazon return authorization was a good move, but likely would have been necessary anyway under TOS eventually.

Solid fail by the company. If you sell IoT tat, idiots will buy it. It is unintelligent not tomplan for that contingency.

And hire someone to deal with customer support from now on, Mr Entrepreneur. Your mad skillz do not include problem escalation.

Mac Pro update: Apple promises another pricey thing it will no doubt abandon after a year

Stevie

Re: We've let you down...(4 Updraft102)

I know of no-one who would contemplate paying the Apple Tax to get off Windows. Them that can't simply say "Windows 10 takes some getting used to but is really not that bad" and those that can will build out a Linux based answer. People who belive that there is an audience waiting to fork over 3 grand for a computer for home use either are barking or work for Apple.

As for buying a Mac to run Windows, that is the gaming crowd. For much as people hate to hear it, y' can't get "all the good games" on all platforms.

Apple continuously fail to properly identify the target audience for their high-end kit, and use the same idiotic form-over-function calculus to make design choices. If Apple were not so obsessed with the pretty they might pause and consider what they could do if the owner did not want to look at the blood thing while he/she worked.

Not that I'm in the market. I cracked my brother-in-law's G3 once as a favor and was appalled by what I found inside the case.

Alabama man gets electrocuted after sleeping with iPhone

Stevie

Re: the memories of John Brown (no body)

Possibly in old house, not recently rewired (for the time period), but my memories of the 70's in the UK was that everything was a standard "13A" plug.

Oh there were ubiquitous 13 amp sockets, I'll grant you. I remember the standard being introduced. Everyone stampeded to fit those nice shiny square pin sockets.

But I know for a fact that very few people understodd the need to properly assess the wiring and replace it where necessary. The comment I made about underfloor heating was not a joke. actual experience at a friend's house when we pulled floorboards and stuck a mirror down there for a new cable pull. No torch needed. wiring proividing nice orange glow. No smell on account of the insulation having slagged off years before they bought the house.

No, I don't know how the house didn't burn down or the wires short out. Just dumb luck.

Stevie

and things like chargers tend to have plastic prongs with metal tops.

In what alternate universe do chargers have plastic prongs?

I have at this moment five "wall wart" chargers, including an official Apple iPad charger, right in front of me and not one of them follows this "plastic prong" design you cite.

I'm not sure why you feel that sleeping on a charger plugged into a live extension cord could only end in sadness in America but I question your logic process in arriving at that conclusion.

Before you wade in: Lived the first 30 years of my life in the UK, father was a chartered electrical engineer and so we did all our own rewiring, and plug installation was taught to me at school since (and American readers will find this hysterically funny) things like hair dryers, washing machines and soldering irons didn't come with a plug fitted out of the box - nominally because in the 1970s you could find upwards of three different plug standards in the same house but actually because UK manufacturers were tight as a crab.

Yes, every purchase mandated a trip to the local hardware store to buy a plug (almost always left fused at 13 amps no matter what the application was to be - so much for the much-vaunted safety) or the removal of a plug from something else.

When I was a teenager, every home had at least one small electric appliance with a cord ending in two pathetic dangling leads because its plug had been scavenged for another device. In summer you would steal the plug from an electric fire to equip, say, a reading lamp, then in the autumn you'd disable your sister's curling tongs so you could have warm feet *and* be able to see to read.

Eventually someone would break down and go and buy a plug, at which point a new appliance would appear in-theater.

And there are some classic pix out there of how people could subvert the "safety" of British sockets to extract juice without the need of a plug or perhaps only needing the pins from a plug shattered in some accident because, despite the charming belief of clever young things, UK plugs are nowhere near indestructible and the people who want to use the magic wall juice are just as cunning and just as unintelligent was those who do the same sort of thing Stateside when they have a shortage of the proper equipment needed.

Stevie

Re: Bah!

That's President Comrade Trump!

Stevie

Re:US "Edison" plugs fall out of the socket

First of all, no they don't. They fall out of superannuated pre WWII sockets that should be replaced as a fire hazard anyway, just like those 5 amp sockets in old English houses should (and how many have been without the extra expense of pulling 13 amp wire? I know of at least one house which ended up with underfloor and in-wall heating thanks to a few new sockets being fitted).

Secondly, that isn't what happened here. Chargy McPhonetard plugged his apple charger into an extension cord, but obviously either not properly or he rolled on the charger so many times in the night its plug pins got seesawed out of the end of the extension cord far enough to become exposed enough for his neckchain to contact the pins. I'll wait while you go back and read for yourself.

Years ago I plugged a lamp into an extension cord but didn't do it right and later that night my gold chain fell off the nightstand and across the pins. When Mrs Stevie turned on the light, there was a bang and a flash and there went my nice serpentine link chain which has proved impossible to get soldered competently. Had I simply checked the cord the whole sad affair could have been avoided.

Stevie
FAIL

Bah!

Disbelieve. Poor science!

"and sent 110 volts through his neck"

Amps go through. Volts stay across.

Fake physics. Sad.

Wi-Fi sex toy with built-in camera fails penetration test

Stevie
Coat

Bah!

Internet of Slit.

I'll show meself out.

Yee-hacked! Fired Texan sysadmin goes rogue, trashes boot business

Stevie

Bah!

Amazing how many here assume the blame lies with the company rather than the scumsucker SA who brought us all into disrepute with this unethical, illegal, downright criminal act.

Forget the shiny and look closer at what the report says: That this a-hole was installing clandestine ways to subvert their shop long before he was fired. Maybe his skulking around had raised suspicions? I don't know but he clearly wasn't a team player for a long while before the Chat in the Office took place.

I guess IT professionals get a free pass from some quarters no matter how fucked-up their actions. Always the Mundane's fault no matter how they jump to do what IT specialists say they should (in this case, hiring someone who knows what needs doing because they obviously don't).

Clearly this was a small shop that only had the one high-octane SA in the trenches. Whether that was because this one engineered the office politics that way (been there, seen that) or the company had no-one to share the duties is not clear and not - when you get down to it - relevant.

I like to remember the oft-repeated warning from just about any chapter on computer security: nothing can protect you from a competent insider with the urge to sabotage.

I await the inevitable announcement of the deployment of the Asperger's Defense.

WikiLeaks exposes CIA anti-forensics tool that makes Uncle Sam seem fluent in enemy tongues

Stevie

Bah!

Gobachev Sings Tractor! Turnip! Buttocks!

Drone complaints to cops are up twelvefold in three years

Stevie

Bah!

Typical overblown hyperbole by El Reg.

The only place drone flights have shot up is in Tennessee.

D'oh! Amber Rudd meant 'understand hashing', not 'hashtags'

Stevie

Bah!

The government seriously should get to grips with the problem of foreigners entering the country on forged Microsoft Passports too.

Mediaeval Yorkshirefolk mutilated, burned t'dead to prevent reanimation

Stevie

Bah!

Alternate theory: "As we gather here to bury our dead, lost in the great raid, we ... hang on, what's that smelly black liquid seeping into the grave? Bring those torches nearer so I can get a better look".

Minnesota, Illinois rebel over America's ISP privacy massacre, mull fresh info protections

Stevie

Re: BuSab (4 P. Lee)

Drop that Jacuzzi Stim, McKie!

Europe to push new laws to access encrypted apps data

Stevie

Bah!

And on the eighth day the banking system got rooted and the world was forcibly pushed back onto the barter system, which in turn caused the collapse of the taxation systems across the western world bringing with it the destruction of each and every government bigger vthan a village bowling green maintenance committee.

New plastic banknote plans now upsetting environmental campaigners

Stevie

Re: um, no

I once ordered soil in cubic yards that had only three cubic feet in them instead of the more usual 27.

I was tired when I did the sums and I don't want to talk about that any more.

Before I had invented places to get rid of 97 cubic feet of topsoil the pile in my driveway had a small tree growing in it and it had been imaged by Google Earth.

Stevie

Bah!

All moo-cow, all the time.

Also: Nuke the Gay Whales.

Windows 10 Creators Update: Clearing the mines with livestock (that's you by the way)

Stevie

Re: Are you sure

Since cash dispensing was the only activity that could be easily accomplished without paging back and forth across multiple screens and provided a printed record request button, yes, I'm just about certain.

Should have mentioned that I got my start designing manufaturing systems data entry UIs in the late 70s, before the programmer could just lazily delegate it all to the O/S, and add that if I'd ever have turned in such a waste of cpu cycles to my chief programmer she'd have broken my fingers one by one and slowly as public entertainment for the rest of the office.

Stevie

Bah!

Ironic that there is so much emphasis on 3d applications when the Windows 10 GUI is flatter than a witch's tit.

A new update to my local Chase ATM has married piss-poor design worthy of web 1.0 with bug-ugly flat GUI aesthetics, no doubt as a result of migrating it to embedded windows 10. Slow response and cancellation tags waiting on the next screen so an irritated *third* tap to get the fucking thing moving started on screen one but actually made contact on screen two and cancelled the whole affair.

The net result is that a five minute trip to the bank to check balances and transfer funds accordingly turned into a twenty five minute visit. Five minutes struggling with the useless redesign, no minutes throwing my hands up in despair and giving up, and twenty minutes getting my exact feelings on the change fed back to corporate by a very nice young manager.

And the purpose of the visit was completely voided.

I've no doubt the programmer thinks he did a bang-up job, and equally sure he never uses an ATM for any purpose other than to get cash.

Bloke is paid to scour hashtags for threats, spots civil rights boss's tweets, gets fired, sues

Stevie

Re: Oh what a tangled web we weave ...

Can we please, for the love of Azathoth, quit it with the fence posts?

Creators Update gives Windows 10 a bit of an Edge, but some old annoyances remain

Stevie

Re: wuauclt

Yet after seven months of trying everything on the web to get WU on my Win 7 lappy to do more than spin using 51% of the processor to no effect, on Monday I got notification of 10 updates waiting (which naturally became 11 after a reboot). After a "rollup" upgrade was installed the service stopped eating cpu cycles so I stopped turning it off when I needed to do heavy lifting.

Funny that my Win 7 system starts working as it used to right after this Win 10 update was pushed out.

BDSM sex rocks Drupal world: Top dev banished for sci-fi hanky-panky

Stevie

Re: They believe women are by nature submissive

But the women presumably participating in the activity are submissive. I don't think most of the people doing this stuff are in any doubt that it is all made up. The outraged public, however, has a bottomless (ahahaha) capacity for shock and horror. This is not new. The Sunday Mirror and the News of the World fed on this very audience for decades.

Stevie
Pint

Re: HOUSEPLANTS OF GOR

First time I had seen that.

Stevie

Bah!

I wish we had some sort of diagram comparing the numbers who have heard of Gor (Love it, hate it, couldn't give a wet slap) to those who've heard of Drupal.

Goreans are almost as daft as Goths, but as long as no-one is getting hurt for real who cares for fuck's sake?

But you know what? I got sent a flyer a while back that included an offer of a seriously businesslike ankle shackle intended to be bolted to the floor. While it was being sold as "play dungeon" equipment it fairly screamed "Saw movie" at me.

So I can kinda see the other side of the coin too (not that this coin was spinning in the air during the events related in the story). Kinda hard to spot a psychopath in amongst all the roleplayers until it's too late when kit like this is available by clicking a mouse button.

But to be crystal clear: IMO writing about Gorean stupids is masturbation, not planning.

Samizdat no more: Old Unix source code opened for study

Stevie

Bah!

SCO declined to sue someone?

Racist Tesla staff drilled my buttocks, claims employee in lawsuit

Stevie

Bah!

Well THANK YOU Register! Now I have to pick a side by myself in the complete absence of media bias! What kind of lame-ass reporting is that? You should be struck off for not being a real news outlet!

One in five mobile phones shipped abroad are phoney – report

Stevie

Re: Are we defining "fake" here as...

I think you'll find that was his brother Manny's IoT store.

Miss Misery on hacking Mr Robot and the Missing Sense of Fun

Stevie

Bah!

If you'd recalled for a bit longer you'd have remembered that Blofeld went tranny in Diamonds are Forever yonks ago.

When will hackers (and the TV shows that feature them) realize that computer savvies just aren't cool any more? No-one is impressed because everyone has had a letter from their bank saying that some plonkers have stolen personal information (again) and had to deal with the nonsense arising from that act.

And if I never hear another CSIclone tech blither about IP addresses as though they were meaningful in this era of mega ISPs it will be four octets of years too soon.

Now get off my lawn. I've a Gibson to unhaxxor.

Bloke whose drone was blasted out of sky by angry dad loses another court battle for compo

Stevie

Re: Drone and string or Drone and wire

Why on earth would anyone do this? A shotgun is cheaper, easier to use and available at any local Walmart.

Why are people making high-tech suggestions to answer a problem solved months ago by more traditional, mature technology methods?

I could understand it if Boggs's drone made it safely back to Castle Perv but it was handily shredded.

It's like three years of university-level CS courses trained people only to replace perfectly good solutions with bright and shiny new ones for the sake of it ... oh, right.

Stevie

Re: the minimium will do nicely

If that were true there would be no scallop-backed cricket bats.

Stevie

Re: always adding extra syllables

Okay, Patched Out: Crickt Bats.

Satsfied?

Stevie

Re: What a colostomy bag...

"I say, old chap, do the colonials actually have cricket bats to hand?"

Amazon makes any piece of sporting equipment, no matter how exotic, just a click away.

Stevie

Re: Guns...

Sweet Azathoth's Nuclear Nebulosity, Boggs has put me in the position of upvoting Bombastic Bob. Shooting's too good for that litigious dronetard.

Stevie

Re: A Glock? Pah!

No, pay attention. The drone was taken down with a shotgun. There was a lively debate as to the implications of that in the comments forvthe original Reg story.

The Glock was for Boggs and his friends (who somehow fell off the stoty this time around).

Stevie

Bah!

Ah, the magnificent Boggs and his flying machine.

Boggs is to the drone hobby what SCO is to Unix.

I see that all mention of his personal posse is now omitted from the retelling. Shame. The whole story takes on a very different tone when the gang's all there.

Stevie

Re: Dig that hole a bit deeper

Trudat.

Samsung plans Galaxy Note 7 fire sale

Stevie

Bah!

It seems to me that one might place a dense stack of these phones as a core, then surround it with a geodesic "sphere" of more phones, then attach even more phones at equidistant points on the vertices of the geodesic shell, then make one call from several miles away as a handy atoll removal scheme.

Astroboffins clock thriving stellar nursery nestled in violent supermassive black hole

Stevie

Bah!

I think what we have here is a bi-galactic glider gun.

How Ford has slammed the door on Silicon Valley's autonomous vehicles drive

Stevie

Re: ... start your vehicle and warm it up from inside the house on a cold day... (4 Voyna i Mor)

"The point about CO is that it is a silent killer - you don't notice anything wrong till you're unconscious. "

You do, you know.

You feel very relaxed and carefree, and an interesting thing happens: your intellect is screaming at you to act to save your life while emotionally you find it *very* hard to care enough to move.

Actual experiential data from a particularly dense and idiotic episode in my past. Knew what was going on. Didn't want to top myself.

But lifting my hand to turn off the ignition was one of the hardest things I've ever tried to do.

My experience says that CO is only a "silent killer" if getting out takes longer than you have left by the time you figure it out or you are asleep when you get exposed.

Stevie

Re: The CAN standard makes it very clear that security is not a part of the core specification.

The same thinking that gave us the botnet internet of tat things.

How unhelpful.

I've Been Moved: IBMers in same division slapped with 2nd redundo scheme in 2 months

Stevie

Re: 40000?

Nonono, these jobs were promised as "good jobs, high paying jobs, not the bad jobs we had under Obama"

Stevie

Re: Um...

I lost a good job because I refused to be moved to the used-to-be-a-toxic-superfund-cleanup-site-before-the-state-"acquired"-the-site that is Endicott.

Cadmium polluted, wasn't it?

Stevie

Bah!

I see "three" projects in all:

1) Baccarat

2) Ruby

3) Alamo

Decapitating Rockall: How a 1970s Navy expedition blasted the top off the Atlantic islet

Stevie

Bah!

I say! Pipe down Wolftone and stop corking our juices!

MI5 man to steer GCHQ as Trump wiretapping saga continues

Stevie

Re: Are you sure?

Well, since he's only parroting back something "someone said" on Fox News (and Trump himself is backpeddaling from the suggestion he actually made the accusation in the first place rather than repeated an already in the wild accusation) the actual question you should ask yourself is "how do I keep a straight face when I suggest in public that Trump is not wrong"?

Murder in space: NASA orders astronauts to KILL cripples – then fire bodies back to Earth

Stevie

Re: WHy????!!!!!!

Rat and Dragon?

Cordwainer Smith reference noted and logged by a passing pinlighter.

Samsung's Bixby totally isn't a Siri ripoff because look – it'll go in phones, TVs, fridges, air con...

Stevie

Bah!

Wonderful.

Hard to see how this could be another boil on the backside of The Internet of Tat.

Bloke cuffed after 'You deserve a seizure' GIF tweet gave epileptic a fit

Stevie

Re: That college name

Why would you think that there are no "Warwick"s in the USA? It's a big place and the original puritan settlers had little imagination when it came to names. Cast a look over the maps of Pennsylvania, New Hampshire and Massachusetts.First thing I noticed when I came here was that for every old Indian name there were two ported from Blighty. The only surprising thing is they bunged "New" in front of "York".

Anyway, I don't think it's called Warwick University any more is it? I thought they mashed it together with the Lanch and called it "Coventry University", which for all the city has a history going back beyond the days of Stephen and Maud sounds bloody horrible. Dunno why.

Stevie

Bah!

This one's easy isn't it?

Put 'em in a room with a photic driver until they each have the condition themselves.

Norfolk County Council sent filing cabinet filled with kids' info to a second-hand shop

Stevie

Bah!

Time for someone to get flonked with a dwile!