* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

16005 publicly visible posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

The best mad scientist memoir of the year

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Grenade

Luckily he's Aspie then

"Would it be possible to blow up the entire Soviet Union with a launch-to-arrival time of two minutes, so there could be no possibility of retaliation on warning?"

I would have caved in the guy's head in the office with the paper weight in a heartbeat. And no remorse.

How can the storage industry prevent cloud bursts?

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Troll

So no conclusion, then?

Trust but verify. I can live with that.

So at what point did banks become "trustworthy"? Come to think of it, I still don't know when my bank will fold, taking everything with it; I have no real indicators as everything is nicely obfuscated. Surveillance often is asleep at the wheel (BCCI, anyone?) and one may have to wait for criminal investigations or recession crunch time for some effective "rating". In the latter case, governement steps in with a "bailout" but that's no solution either, it's just a licence for the bank to play pirate at taxpayer expense.

If your cloud crashes and burns, the gov will give you back your byte amount taken from /dev/urandom. Hmm...

Troll logo, because it's all hair-raising.

iPhone worm hacker gets death threats, job offers

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Flame

"messing with their wide-open Sendmail gateways"

Google will help you ascertain that these were not "wide open sendmail gateways" but that you had to buffer overflow the sendmail process, then load source, compile it, make sure that it couldn't be removed easily, and further attack other machines..

If that is "messing with sendmail" then breaking and entering then bludgeoning granny to death is similar to pushing the unlocked front door.

Feds pinch two Madoff geeks

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Go

Better to work for the Federal Reserve, guys...

...there you can falsify books all day long in all legality.

Dirty, dirty PCs: The X-rated picture guide

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Grenade

Tried to get sand and dust out of a PC...

...by dumping a few liters of demineralised water onto (and not sparing the power supply either). How did the sand get in? The building's front had been sanded down during a the preceding week and the stuff had seeped in through cracks in the window frames.

The PC still worked afterwards.

Europe clamours for data centre capacity

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Boffin

Power, power, power

>>Nothing is about 'racks' anymore, it's all about the kW and the kW/m2.

Quite. Have your OpenOffice Calc sheet ready, as well as your SNMP-able power supply rail and roll those numbers. I'm just migrating stuff to a rack in a well-secured datacenter (which has sculptures in the lobby and two meaty dudes behind 1-inch plate glass). We start off with a full rack at 900 EUR/month for 2kW, and pricing is just stepped in kVA and J/month burned. Network? Don't care...

MS patent looks just like Unix command, critics howl

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Flame

Patents: dripfeed for lawyers and civil servants

>>why should we respect the US patent system?

We don't of course. A separate patent has to be taken out in the various countries of the EU to be valid. As for the Chinamen, lip service is the order of the day.

Anyway, the whole patent system - not just the software patents - is total crap. I can't wait for this mistake to land on the scrapheap of history. It started off with the Wright Brothers and Edison going full retard and scuttling their potential commercial success trying to be monopolists hiding under Mama Govnmt's shirts. It hasn't become better since. Yeah, all that "publication of ideas" B.S. and blah blah blah.

US Navy 'PANDA' tech to sniff out 'deviant' sailors

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MORE data to sift trough...

...it's not like the slighty surpassed civil servants in the Homecrank Security Department are currently able to manage their terabytes of "leads". Yes, please dumpster dive into every trashcan in the world, why don't you.

Brazilian Playboy eyes miniskirted uni student

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Paris Hilton

When we will hear feminists...

...rightfully outraged by this shameless exploitation of women?

Microsoft boots modders off Xbox Live

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Coat

"Because when you see one you'll turn 360 degrees and walk away."

The problem then being that you will bump into said box.

Health sector spews out much more carbon than airlines or IT

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Flame

Ok, can we have more pointless carbon-production "segmentation" please?

Next: evaluation of methane emissions by old ladies with dachshunds.

NASA: the world will not end in 2012

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Flame

Yeah, as expected, climate-change deniers are on the horn.

"So NASA believes one kooky theory but not the other - could it be there's profit to be made out of the more 'believable' one?"

Could it be that there is serious evidence of one but no evidence at all of the other?

Yes, go look at the graphs and pretend that ice on the pole is actually increasing. Works well if you are squinting.

Now waiting for the 9/11 truthers, the UFO conspirationists, the JFK assassination nutjobs and the Quantum Mechanics is Wrong retards to chime in.

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FAIL

Nibiru? Sounds Romanian.

Did the ancient Romanians know something that we don't?

Ok, maybe Japanese. "Double ball pen". Hmmm... Ominous.

Anyway, didn't we have the "polar reversal" B.S. back in the early 80's? There was also panic production because of an "alignment of the planets". Of course, nothing happened and primary school went droningly on. Sh*t.

Police fail to dampen down bonfire night Westminster protest

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Political police beaten? Never!

But why so few Guys?

El Reg's LHC visit - Deleted Scenes

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Moar like this!

Way cooler than miniature trains. In more than one way.

'Something may come through' dimensional 'doors' at LHC

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Alien

Invasion of the Hermitian Hilbert Space Operators!

Yes!! Imminent Transdimensional Invasion threatens. Upgrade to plan CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN and implement shoot-to-kill police state immediately. Then strike a NuLabour/NuOverlords deal. Win/Win situation.

As for the rest of us, anyone who judges himself able to understand modern QFT and assorted mathematical tooling enough to be able to even judge the likelihood of an LHC event killing the planet or whatnot can probably understand http://arxiv.org/abs/0806.3381 And thus the case rests.

> Considering that black holes are known to have a magnetic force

> The unknowns and improbables are possible but no one know the odds.

> Hey, our maths says there's an infinite number of universes out there, and they all really exist!

> Perhaps LHC-type devices are an evolutionary test for advanced intelligence

> Since Everything is made of Photons, this pinpoint sized object thus contained, well, Everything.

LOL NO!! This is like listening to a badly tuned radio.

Ok, enough of this, I'm going home.

Mossad hacked Syrian laptop to steal nuke plant secrets

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Black Helicopters

Syrian infosec fail!

Why do these guys think they can build nuclear reactor if they leave laptops lying around? Apart from that, Bushco/AIPAC & Israel together are dumb as a sack of beans; they should just have told the IAEA to go take a look-see, but that that wouldn't have been manly and Tom-Clancy-like enough, now would it? Can't have THAT.

Ceterum censeo to AC:

"I am reminded of the enigma encoded message that was sent to the Mexicans offering them arms to fight against the US, this was decoded in the UK, but they staged a break in at the German embasy to make it look like it had been stolen. Knowledge that enigma had been cracked would have been very bad for the war effort."

You are mixing up the history of WWII (Enigma) and WWI (the Rest). Don't forget that the telegram was a godsend for Wilson so he could stick his fat interventionist finger into the Euro-Mess, leading to century of total catastrophe. Nice doing.

Sun's Facebook-slapping hits wrong target

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Pint

i HAVE IT ON GOOD AUTHORITY...

that all of the teens killed or paedofiled had, in addition to a facebook account, NO VALID COMMUNIST PARTY MEMBERSHIP CARD (Marxist/Leninist/Zinonviest branch). NOT ONE!!

This is a clear indication that, if they had been members of the COMMUNIST PARTY (Marxist/Leninist/Zinonviest branch), none of this would have happened!

THINK ABOUT IT!

Become member of the COMMUNIST PARTY today. For safer yoof!

US unemployment rate breaks ten per cent

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Flame

"the bail out sorted only the financial sector"

Actually not. Bank closures are still ongoing.

After the "printing money to prop up an inflating bubble does not create a healthy economy" shocker, we bring you the amazing finding that the sky is indeed blue. After this messge.

Google countersues in Android Specht-spat

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Flame

Let's have _some_ evil please

I hope they roll over the Specht (== woodpecker) like an enraged Hadoop and just leave a thin paste for Coyote.

Brown declines to resign

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Flame

I like the implied hubris...

"The Prime Minister is completely focused on restoring the economy, getting people back to work and improving standards in public services."

Like some politician in an office with the money press his only asset could actually do that.

Vint Cerf mods Android for interplanetary interwebs

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Boffin

Isn't that the "Licklider Transmission Protocol"?

...and if so, why isn't that name used any longer??

Mac art project game destroys aliens files

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Coat

"Seriously, what do security software companies take us for?"

Challenged Mac Users in VIP Lounge Uproar Shocker....

Still, an interesting game. The only way to win is not to play.

Reg hack pursues Street View spymobile

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How do I add sighting?

In mid-October, here:

http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?ie=UTF8&oe=utf-8&hl=en&msa=0&msid=103601503239287784075.0004520bb894b73db51de&ll=49.88543,3.622356&spn=16.025043,17.552847&source=embed

Volcanic African 'unzipping' could see continent divided

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Alien

Chtulhu rising!

The stars are right!

Big business bullies EU into open source U-turn

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Paris Hilton

Why do lobbysists do such things?

...so that their clients can show a few lines on a PowerPoint slide under an NDA and still be able to say they are "Open Source"?

US gov warns banks on money mules

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Thumb Down

"Such scams have plundered at least $40m from small- to mid-sized businesses."

And this is a problem how? The last time I checked, government in collusion with banks are in the process of stealing billions of dollars from small- to mid-sized businesses through inflationary pressure.

Aspiring model pleasures Taoist master

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Pint

Just keep on trucking...

It's always sad when the Buddha-belly turns out to be just another beer gut.

'Internet Age' means egalitarian 'hunter-gatherer' society

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FAIL

Hunter-gathering today...

1) Have a few million stashed away

2) Buy your way into parliament through "elections"

3) Sell war and insecurity to the hoi polloi while collecting tickets from the military-security complex

4) ???

5) Profit!!

NASA to irradiate monkeys for science

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Coat

Mutant money monkeys

"it's reintroducing the neglected trade of doing strange and unusual things to moneys for science."

That's not a neglected trade, the Fed's doing it all the time for fun and profit (though definitely not for science), generating inflation (nothing to do with cosmic inflation, sadly).

"NASA said the monkeys will not be killed and will retire to McLean Hospital in Boston where veterinarians and staff will oversee the animals for the remainder of their lives."

The word "lifetime guarantee" come to mind.

Ares 1-X booster rocket dented in test flight

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That's it. Shut it down now!

"...they came to the realization that they were not taking into account the stress on the sensors from vibrations of the structure on which they were mounted at launch when analyzing the launch data and..."

Non-Latin web addresses approved

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Coat

Aww JEEZ!

Luckily many people run that nasty "Bind" piece of work chrooted now. Get ready for a long sequence of buffer overflow bugs.

DEFRA loses tapes - and plot

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Headmaster

Amazing stuff

"Encryption these days is basically "free", in the sense that it's built-in or bundled with any kit you can buy."

And if not, it's spelled "Perl" and "openssl". Oh yeah, you need someone able to write a script, too.

Microsoft counters Windows 7 upgrade hack advice

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Gates Horns

There is a Microsoft tax but knowledgeable people know how to dodge it...

So ... MS has state-enforced power to force you to buy their stuff over and over and over again at elevated pricing? Patrolled and enforced by the BSA vigilantes and teams of plods that have nothing better to do? All in the name of saving the loss of "billions" of children, I mean GBP?

Well, it's good to be officially reminded that you are the object of a shakedown and protection racket.

Even if you can't do much about it except vote with your feet.

Google sued for super-skinny Chrome polishing

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Thumb Down

I think we just shut down this whole "entrepreneurship" bull. Who needs it, just print money.

"Basically, the technology updates pieces of a remote software package without updating the whole thing."

It's called "rsync".

FFS.

Novell aims SCO tussle at the Supremes

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FAIL

I'm sure SCO would hire Doug Feith in a heartbeat

"SCO was quite sure that the deal included the Unix copyrights as well - so sure that it started waving them at the Linux industry,"

Implying that Linux infringes any AT&T Unix copyrights.

If I remember well, at the start of this SCO cancertrip, the claim was that "Linux had copied" "thousands and thousands" of lines, which was demonstrated with a PowerPoint slideshow showing similar C comments and the identical numbering of the process signals. This was later whittled down to 25 lines or so.

Governator in acrostic 'f**k you' outrage

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Thumb Up

The dysfunctional and bankrupt Republic of California

"Unfortunately, this humour came at the cost of the Port of San Francisco."

Has it been nuked after a misplaced remark to a Russian? I didn't know about that.

Turkish filters block Reg commentards

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Big Brother

+(-72,virgins)

So does Turkey have a Big Firewall or just the company providing connectivity on which our esteemed co-reader happened to be perusing the Regalia in question?

Punked US Chamber sues faux press release pranksters

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Pint

"The Constitution trumps all other law"

You have been away a few years. Let me fill you in on a what happend to a certain piece of paper....

Facebook enshrines dead people profiles

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Welcome

"no one can actually log in to the account"

Damn! There goes one of the Web 2.0 ways of communicating with the deceased.

Oh well, back to listening to static on AM radio and check white noise on old TV sets for some messages from beyond.

Rogue trader calls for smarter regulation to avert disaster

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Grenade

"The global financial collapse last year could have been avoided."

Well yeah. If someone with more rectitude and with less bubbly love than Greenspan had been at the helm, if banks and government were not allowed to print money, if the government didn't step in to bail out banks...

I'm sorry, you were calling for better regulation?

Prof: Extremists tend to dominate debates

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Paris Hilton

Predictable

".. I immediately think of those screaming that the changing climate is all our fault ?"

Because these people are of course "the minority."

In reality, only Andrew and a few dudes who could as well be in the orbit of the 9/11 truthosphere are saying so.

Extremists think that most people think the way they do? Well, my dear Victor, the experience was a success!

Raytheon unveils Linux 'Insider Threat' rooter-out routers

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Grenade

Making Himmler proud

"government insider threat management solution"

Because of course the "government" must be "protected" from "insiders" (aka. the nominally in-charge public). Wouldn't want to take the blinders of the horse, now would you?

But it's good to know that all those "leaks" appearing in the Wall Street Journal, Washington Post and other neocon watering places will no longer just be under suspicion that they are deliberate misinformation.

A grenade, to be tossed into various undisclosed locations.

Judge shoots down challenge to Craigslist erotic services

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Flame

"Land of the free"

"Prostitution laws"

laughingelf.jpg

Crypto spares man who secretly video taped flatmates

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Big Brother

Anyone else got a flashback to "Shallow Grave"

....man, that movie haunted me for YEARS

Windows 7 - the Reg reader verdict

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Coat

Verdict: Windows is like US presidents....

...because after a true horror show, we get something that sucks somewhat less, though it's still the same underneath.

Nice show.

Red Hat enjoys fruit of recession

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Flame

"Clearly a downturn is never good generically, it’s a bad thing."

On the contrary. It's like working off the alcohol after a night on the tiles. The economy readjusts after the heady party days of easy credit, serial malinvestments and bubble blowing. People look for good investment schemes, unsustainable businesses get folded and prices readjust. Of course, like a host fearing that hung over guests will turn sour, government does everything it can to keep the blood alcohol high and the cocaine bowls filled by doing the Keynesian song & dance: print money, burn resources and keep giving out easy credit. Welcome to the Great Recession.

Much ado about IBM's mainframe monopoly

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Grenade

"there is no simple way to legislate fairness in business"

De-legislation could work wonders.

Level the playing field. Begin by dumping a whole lot, if not all, of the "Intellectual Property" cancer. Trademarks could stay and so (obviously) could trade secrets, but anything related to patents, copyright on APIs and restrictions on reverse engineering should be thrown on the scrap heap of history. A lot of rent-generating cushy positions would suddenly be opened to the wonders of the oft-praised "ecosystem". Yeah, I know, it's an "ecosystem" if you get to determine where others may put their shrubberies, and it's "unfettered capitalism in need of regulation, destroying the hopes of the small innovators" if you feel the heat.

MySQL daddy backs EU's Snoracle probe

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Monty the whiny ass could've stopped shipping InnoDB libs with MySql but he didn't.

Double extraordinary Facepalm.

SCO boots boss McBride

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Grenade

Those who fight lawyers should see to it that in the process they do not become themselves lawyers

"It also stated the company expects to finalize details of the restructuring and to reach cash flow break-even for core operations within the next month."

Clearly the lawyer team is now working pro bono and is consulting for third parties to generate some cash.