* Posts by Zippy's Sausage Factory

766 publicly visible posts • joined 12 Mar 2008

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Microsoft's CRM chief defects to Salesforce

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Are the rats deserting the sinking ship, then?

Decoding Microsoft: Cloud, Azure and dodging the PC death spiral

Zippy's Sausage Factory

I read this as...

"We still exist. We're doing shiny, too - look. Windows Phone, that's just about still a thing you can buy. And Active Directory - we know you hate it, it's still not as good as NDS used to be, but who else is there any more? Oh and our expression recognition is just about sort of usable - no worse than anyone else's."

Google takes old Chrome versions on that long drive in the country

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Not A Problem

Because XP comes with the plague pre-installed, and Google are going to stop making the cure?

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Sometimes OS is hardware constrained

Same boat for me. Using my old faithful Mac running Lion because my newer, shinier Mac is currently a doorstop awaiting a trip to the repair shop. Again.

T-Mobile US megahack cost Experian $20m, class actions coming

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Shouldn't T-Mobile sue Experian over this?

You know - recover all their costs, damages to reputation, etc.

Just a thought...

Microsoft Windows Mobile 10: Uphill battle with 'work in progress'

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Onedrive downgrade

That literally has nothing to do with Windows Mobile 10581. In fact, it has nothing to do with Windows Mobile at all. That's a decision by the OneDrive group and it affects anyone with a OneDrive account.

Kinda digs a grave for "One Microsoft" though, doesn't it?

Facebook conjures up a trap for the unwary: scanning your camera for your friends

Zippy's Sausage Factory

There's already an opt out

It says something like "recognise me in other people's photos". I'm a bit hazy what it actually says because it's a few months since I went poking around in privacy but there's a setting that means FB will never use face recognition to tag you in someone else's photo.

At least, there used to be...

Cryptowall 4.0: Update makes world's worst ransomware worse still

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: language mauling

You can't qualify "unique", surely? And anyway, I'd prefer "One of the most terrifying" personally.

Symantec numbers are out. Execs might wish they weren't

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Good...

And that's without mentioning the horror that Ghost became in its later years. Or the Quarterdeck stuff they bought and ruined.

Honestly, if you were a competitor with something Symantec acquired, you'd have been sitting on a goldmine...

Facebook CTO: Clear legal grounds needed for EU-US data exports

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Laws? Courts?

"Yeah, right. Local laws. Who cares about local laws? We don't! Look at some cat pictures and stop thinking, sheeple"

- a quote from the imaginary Facebook person in my head*.

Who is clearly a hyperbolic parody, in case any of FB's lawyers are reading.

Is the world ready for a bare-metal OS/2 rebirth?

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Now I want to dig out my old OS/2 discs and create a VM... :)

TalkTalk offers customer £30.20 'final settlement' after crims nick £3,500

Zippy's Sausage Factory

How to take money from someone's account -set up a direct debit to someone's account using a dodgy third party company maybe?

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Do you work for TalkTalk?

Hi, um, hello, US tech giants. Mind, um, mind adding backdoors to that crypto? – UK govt

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Coat

If they want dick pics:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_c_0_11?url=search-alias%3Dpopular&field-keywords=dicks%20picks&sprefix=dicks+picks%2Caps%2C202

Oh sorry, that's Dick's Picks. I'll get me coat.

Flickering screens turn Microsoft Surface Books into Microsoft Surface paperweights

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Maybe the flicker is...

>Uhm, what do you mean? MS never was any good at software. All their successful products they

>purchased.

The "Mystify" screensaver - that was one of theirs, wasn't it?

Although yeah, the "Bezier curves" wasn't an improvement...

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Maybe the flicker is...

"Microsoft isn't that good with hardware anyway."

They don't seem to be that good at software any more either, judging by recent efforts.

And given that I do all my work development on their platform and it's how I earn my living, that worries me...

Why was the modem down? Let us count the ways. And phone lines

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Ahh the screeching chirrup

I still use GetRight, but usually only when DownThemAll won't handle it (which is increasingly rare - usually it's the other way round these days)

Oracle's Larry Ellison claims his Sparc M7 chip is hacker-proof – Errr...

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Happy

Any chance of a SPARC lappie running Linux?

Although I could probably anchor it to the ceiling with the cooling fans it would need, but hey...

SatNad failure as Lumia income drops over 50% at Microsoft

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Facepalm

The ship is sinking, and Nadella's replacing the luxury deckchairs with cheap plastic ones...

Microsoft's top lawyer: I have a cunning plan ... to rescue sunk safe harbor agreement

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Devil

"law enforcement agencies could obey the law".

Ah dear, that'll never happen... best laugh I've had all week...

BBC shuts off iPlayer to UK VPNs, cutting access to overseas fans

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Suggests their much-delayed global download store *might* just about be ready to launch.

I won't hold my breath though.

Devs ask Microsoft for real .NET universal apps: Windows, Mac, iOS, Android

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Coding .NET and C# now because it is universal.

In which case I misinterpreted what you said - I was under the impression that not only you were advocating everyone write their own abstraction library and that yours was 20,000 lines of code. And as you've clarified, not only is it about 5% of that size, it's only as big as it is because what you're doing is probably an edge case. So my bad, and I apologise for any offence caused.

Code once and deploy anywhere always sounds good in theory - it never works in practice, of course. The difference between the mobile and desktop paradigms - and Windows 8's astounding success* at unifying the two - is merely an example of that principle in action :)

* Sarcasm alert

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Facepalm

Re: Coding .NET and C# now because it is universal.

Because we all have time to write 20,000 lines of graphics library to write one simple app.

That's called "a waste of my time". That's what it is. Why would you advocate writing your own version of Qt / swing / etc - that's what a cross platform Windows.Forms would be, and that's what people were asking for in UserVoice.

Zippy's Sausage Factory

I think he means that UWP apps are an attempted lock-in, with their "One Windows" ish ness.

I personally like the idea of Lazarus - cross platform, runs on Win/Lin/OsX, produces proper executables. Unfortunately, Object Pascal. Not my favourite language...

4K catches fire with OTT streamers, while broadcasters burn

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Devil

"There will be nothing else".

That will scare Hollywood. 35mm film can be rescanned at 6K fairly easily. But all the stuff since about 1998, all that stuff that's been made on digital? That lovely wizzy 2K stuff? Old hat low res. In the bin with it, next to the missing episodes of Dr Who...

Team Microsoft: Device Police... 'Are you pumped? I'm pumped'

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Oh dear

Who ever thought there would be a Microsoft conference where Microsoft software was the elephant in the room everybody was studiously trying to ignore?

For all that the Surface Book might be a game changer, and the Lumias might be the greatest phones ever made, all I can smell from here is the slow, creeping spread of decay.

Don't look now, but there's another EU data protection court case about to bite

Zippy's Sausage Factory

I'm on Hungary's side here

Not that it will make much difference. Most companies think of their "customers" as sheep to be fleeced, nothing more. If they could get away with planting malware on the computer and harvesting our bank accounts, I can't think of many international companies that wouldn't do it.

Mobile first? Microsoft decides to kneecap its Android users instead

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Pint

There used to be an 8-ball easter egg

In Access '97 it was.

One of the things it used to say was "Outlook not so good".

Never was sure whether that was a value judgement or not.

But then again this was the same version of Office that if you typed "I'd like to see Bill Gates dead" in Word, formatted it as UK English* and asked for an alternative from the thesaurus it said "I'll drink to that". I can imagine billg wasn't happy...

* Or was is US English? This is 18 years ago and my memory is fuzzy.

Australia to capture biometrics at the border under new law

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Big Brother

Smells of 1984 to me

Next stop - automated fingerprint readers that sound an alarm when someone's wanted for a crime. Preferably that loudly shouts "paedophile alert" so the other passengers don't try and assist you.

Then, start making things that the government objects to illegal. A nice law a bit like Thailand's, to stop you criticising the government, that will do for a start.

(Think I'm joking? Wait a couple of years...)

KARMA POLICE: GCHQ spooks spied on every web user ever

Zippy's Sausage Factory

I can imagine several foreign governments being annoyed with this.

Mainly Germany. But possibly a few others as well.

Sino the times, as Microsoft makes Baidu default search engine in China

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Becasue they wanted to?

Or because they were told they wanted to?

I'm betting (b)

Citrix wants a buyer, fast

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Microsoft

It may no longer be the case - I know this was definitely the case for NT 4 Terminal Services Edition, whether it's still the same in RDP 8.1 I don't know, I suspect they are still using the same patents (presuming they haven't expired, of course) but I can't find any citations.

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Paris Hilton

Microsoft

Quite a bit of core Windows tech is actually owned by Citrix and licenced to Microsoft, so I can imagine MS getting a bit nervy about this. If Google bought Citrix then it would essentially be massive leverage for Google, and I can imagine that would a nightmare scenario for some MS shareholders (Does shy & retiring Steve Ballmer still get actively involved?)

(Paris because there's no "I am seriously wondering what, exactly, the implications of this news might be" icon)

Nice try, Apple. The Maxi Pad is no laptop killer – and won’t scratch the Surface

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Just a thought, but...

If MS are releasing Office for iPad, and the new keyboard and stylus look a lot like the Surface one and MS aren't suing them for copying THEIR rounded rectangles...

Is it me or are MS hoping to just quietly kill the Surface and hope nobody notices?

Get that OFF dot-com, hysterical France screeches at Google

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Devil

Fun...

If that's the case, then should we presume the French government are fine with American law applying, without exception, to everything Google does in France, as well as French law, then?

So if the NSA asks for the data from a French government minister's personal gmail account, Google should just say "oui, certainement" and hand it over?

Just asking...

Sharp's new TV has over 7,000 lines of pixels – but there's NOTHING TO WATCH

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Devil

So this means everything Hollywood's done that wasn't on 35mm film is going to look ropey. I'm sure the big studios will just love that... nobody will want to watch anything made between about 1990 and some time next year or so.

Spaniard claims WWII WAR HERO pigeon code crack. Explain please

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Howt to heap shit on your own head

Given that GCHQ have known about the message since 2012 - and issued press releases about it - does rather suggest that it's about as secret as the front page of the Daily Mail.

As for the copyright infringement bit, well, I think we'd be talking patents rather than copyright - and they'd have expired in the 60s at the latest...

BACS Bank Holiday BALLS UP borks 275,000 payments

Zippy's Sausage Factory

BACS will not be happy

I once reported my mortgage provider to BACS for cocking up my direct debit and writing it to my credit record as a default when it was their fault. What was suspicious was that they started sending the wrong details to the bank just as we had started the remortgage process in place. After a flat refusal to change the credit record, two days after I reported it to BACS they changed it and sent us a letter of apology.

I also did that to the Council when they screwed up my Council Tax (nothing fishy, just incompetence). I was told - through a contact who worked there - that they had to grovel to BACS and agree to being audited by them in order to keep their ability to collect Direct Debits.

So if BACS is working normally, I expect there will be quite a lot of shouting going on right now...

Net neutrality: How to spot an arts graduate in a tech debate

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Devil

Er, but...

Let's say I run a dodgy ISP. I require you to use my DNS servers, so I block calls to 8.8.8.8 and 8.8.4.4 directly, thus I control your traffic*. So I filter NetFlix through a proxy that checks who you are. Do you pay the extra 5 simoleons a month for faster Netflix? No? Well my proxy limits you to 1mbps then. Do you pay the extra 5 simoleons a month for better Facebook? No? Well then my proxy limits you to 56K a second on Facebook.

Net neutrality isn't really about detecting magic kit that ISPs aren't using yet. It's about future proofing the law to prevent ISPs getting creative and installing ways to screw punters for another fiver a month for the "upgraded" service so they can watch cat videos on YouTube...

* Yes, simplified. It's just an example...

Get whimsical and win a Western Digital Black 6TB hard drive

Zippy's Sausage Factory

"Installing iOS 9 beta 3? How? Oh come on... I just wanted to play Candy Crush.

"I bet it doesn't work with 9 anyway, none of the good games do..."

Salesforce back in the red, reviews future black ink orders

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Given the massive drop in stocks worldwide lately, I'm guessing there's a big financial crisis coming (and I don't think I'm alone in saying that.)

I think ti's likely any company making losses or thin profits now is probably already in danger of closing by the end of next year.

Microsoft will explain only 'significant' Windows 10 updates

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Under UK law

Illegal contract terms can't be enforced. Not like US law, where an illegal contract term renders the contract null and void.

Interesting times for Microsoft lie ahead if they try to start that shenanigans with large businesses, methinks...

Android apps are flooding on to jailbroken Win10 phones

Zippy's Sausage Factory

So I might as well delete Visual Studio then...

Might as well just target Android now then, if it runs on Windows as well. Bye bye MSDN subscription I suppose...

ZUCK OFF: Facebook nixes internship after student embarrasses firm

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Facepalm

Because a blackhat hacker is going to care about Ts&Cs...

Two weeks of Windows 10: Just how is Microsoft doing?

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Silverlight ain't ever gonna be supported

They've been trying to kill it for years.

Cloudflare hiccup nudges Stack Overflow and others offline

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Mushroom

Shame StackOverflow came back up

Some of the nastiest, most spiteful trolls I've ever met tend to be community moderators on that particular cesspit.

FAIL: Windows 10 bulk patch produces INFINITE CRASH LOOP

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Joke

And that sound you can hear

is the sound of Microsoft, one arm aloft, jumping in the air on its water skies. Over a shark...

(Joke alert because there isn't a "weep with despair" icon...)

'Cops KNOW WHO I AM and I don't believe their hearts were truly in the shootout'

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Joke

He really did spend too much time with Mr Blobby, didn't he?

Oh come on, everybody knows Blobby votes UKIP... why else is he purple?

Windows 10 is FORCING ITSELF onto domain happy Windows 7 PCs

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Mushroom

Wonder how many bankruptcies will result

And how many lawsuits?

I can imagine there are a few people being shouted at in Redmond today...

AIDS? Ebola? Nah – ELECTRO SMOG is our 'biggest problem', says Noel Edmonds

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Trollface

Re: Minions

I miss Mr Blobby. Let's face it, he was the only reason anyone watched House Party anyway.

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