Posts by Boris the Cockroach

Well this

has given me enough ideas for conversation starters with my estwhile colleague(most hated enemy) in the chair opposite.

Well he would be in the chair opposite if he wasn't locked in the toliet at the moment after finding out his ham sandwich lunch had'nt have turned out to be a ham and chilli sauce sandwich.

Of course it couldn't have been me because he locks his lunch in his desk just in case there are malicious people out there to do him harm

But it was a coincidence that the PFY dragged him off for a lengthy and technical explanation of a production problem at about 10am , giving a highy motivated and malicious person enough time to unscrew the back off his desk, open said sandwich and lightly dust it with tobasco... just enough to make him think his other 1/2 left chilli sauce on the butter knife last night.. and then replace everything good as new.

But I guess making him destroy his own keyboard was reward enough for now

Next week : That persisent buzzing noise he hears after he gets a jab next Thurs.....

On the bright side

at that speed at least any debris from a collosion will quickly escape earths orbit and join the 1000s of space rocks already in solar orbit..

Its all cover story

anyway

I have it on good authority that the target for the probe is not a space rock, but an alien space craft due to land here in dec 2022, hence hitting it with a large mass going at 6 km/sec

The source is also the one that revealed the godzilla attack of 2005, and that Elvis is running a diner in Dayton Ohio

Bet I can take a guess

Username :admin

Password : 1234

eeeeeeeeeee special branch at the door... they think I'm a l33t h4XX0r

Oh dear

god... what heathen hell spawned creatures created this abomination unto the gods?

To meddle with things beyond the realm of mortal admins..... 'tis the work of the devil I tell you!

Wish my

operators had lamp test buttons.

Could easily see which ones are the bright ones, or the dim ones or the not working need replacing ones...

Beer time... praise whatever gods/goddesses you believe in

Ahhhh

this brings back the memories.

The bad ones

<<hides until the PTSD calms down a bit.

We needed some consumable parts (not that we ate them) , to be exact, we needed 10 of them to get a job out.

So we filled out the paperwork, then filed it with the suitable department.

Then the bean counters got hold of it and decided in their wisdom , to cut the order in half because of the cost.

And thus the wheels of government turned and the parts duely arrived

"FIVE!" was the shout that went up, and thus tempers were frayed, and I learned a suitable lesson in diplomacy from my line manager who went to see the beancounters.

"You lot get down there and *^*&%ing well explain to rear admiral Sir Talbot Smyth-Thomson why his multi-million pound project is sitting in our workshop with only 1/2 the ^&%*ing bits on it we need to make it work"

Strangely the paperwork was done in about 5 minutes and the parts obtained later that day..... and the beancounters never changed another order again..

30 yrs late

thanks to the 'green' movement

Actually the green movement has been dead a long time now... it was taken over by the marxists after their beloved soviet union fell apart...

Which a explains a conversation with a 'green' party member who was advocating installing a wind turbine on every house because that will set us free from 'big energy co', 'fossil fuel plc' and 'big business' generally.

He got very unhappy when pointed out that a simple 5 bladed turbine for every house would require 30 million turbines built with 150 million blades made (with millions more as spares..) and that the company making them will become extremely rich, able to buy.. sorry lobby politicians and generally become exactly like the 'big businesses' he hated already...

Anyway... about bloody time.. heres to Sizewell C, Dungerness C and Heysham C as well and finally stop throwing crap up exhaust pipes....

Does that

mean if we block m$ at the firewall, our copies of win11 will stop working either instantly or when they decide to phone home and cant?

Or will win 11 be like some god awful virus and attempt to phone home across multiple IPs.................

Someone create an outlook/office killer that runs on linux....

A meta universe

sounds like great fun to escape this mudane one

I for one will be lapping this up with my VR headset....... except something itches at the back of my head and it aint fleas

Once hes got everyone inside his metaverse ..... whos going to be on the outside actually doing stuff...?

And whos going to be watching what goes on inside (besides the spam artists)

In fact... <puts down VR headset> I'll take my VR with games and say no way in hell am I stepping inside that metaverse....... I've seen the crap on FB and they do nothing about it except spam you even more crap because 'you clicked on the link'

Lets just say one site in previous years would be limited to a badly xeroxed flysheet handed out on street corners by a loon raving at a cloud... now he has 5 million 'followers' and can broadcast to the planet thanks to FB

Just goes to show

that know nothing plonkers in power is nothing new

And that most of the UK's 'leadership' over the past 50 years wouldn't know a good idea if it hit them between the eyes.

Look at today's kerfluffles over global warming... 25 years ago we KNEW that our nuclear power stations would be getting to their end of life... along with the coal powered stations.

And that global warming(well CO2 emission) would be a big thing in the years to come.

So its a no brainer to replace existing nuclear and maybe replace the coal (and gas as it turned out) with a mix of more nuclear and renewables of some sort.

Except the plonkers in charge at the time took the same sort of decision the government did in 1971 ..

Oh well

Buffer overflows

STILL ? !!!!!!

Caution : multiple exclaimation marks are the sign of a diseased mind

The design decision

I've never understood is m$ moving away from the 'classic' windows interface design

I made sure winxp and win 7 had that switched on because it was nice, and it worked (plus people were familier with it)

Also you could find the settings on the start menu in order to tweak your computer... and if you wanted 'advanced' settings there was usually a button on the dialog to get your there

Win 8 and 10 interfaces.. a huge step backwards... find the settings for the FIFO RS232 uart buffer......... arggle

why didnt m$ just update 'under the hood' and keep the interface?

Not quite punchcards

but punchtape

At the end of the punchtape theres a choice of 2 commands, program end and program end/tape rewind

As a newbie I always used end/rewind.. its what I'd been taught.. its what I knew..

However what I didnt know was that the tape reader/reels thing on the machine was buggered....... so my loverly crafted program on the punch tape went into the machine and it performed brilliantly right up tape end/rewind.... where upon the tape was very successfully shredded by the reader.

Bit of shame really as night shift wnated to make another 11 parts and the tape is in bits........ oops

Canon screwed me

too

Bj4300 i think it was.... expensive for the time... had cheaper ink

Died one day after giving out 13 beeps......... looked in the book "send back to canon for servicing" well screw that .. use t' internet

Nothing.... 12 beeps yes...... 13.... not a thing

Took the printer apart (with a hammer) after buying a new epson.... nothing.. no broken ribbon cable or anything

Checked the internet again a few months later and found an obscure canon forum... one of the service engineers revealed 13 beeps says the ink pad at the bottom needs changing, unclip bottom tray, remove cover , change inkpad, reassemble and power on holding paper feed and press form feed twice...

Bastards...

Among my most

memorable ones... (and there are plenty as I seem to lack a diplomacy gene)

My mangler(of the time) came up and said

"Why is'nt the backend done yet.. gotta be a simple job tying it to the interface design"

My calmness vanished along with the dew in the fields and the mist on the hay.......

"And what blithering dunderhead(somewhat sanitised version of what I said) designed this abomination(again santised for the delicate) of an interface?"

"err that would be me" voices up our most esteemed customer who was lurking behind said mangler....

The silence decended

.

.

I kept my job, the customer liked how forthright the feedback was and said mangler spent the rest of the week chewing on what was left of his toupee.

Huge

bottom clenching time when they light that Ariane 5......

Although it would be funny if the range safety office accidently put his coffee down onto the destruct button 1 min into flight....

In truth though we dont want one of these>>>>>>

The whole

covid story is'nt just about Dido and her lack of ability , but a staggering lack of ability , knowledge and decisiveness among the upper ranks of government, especially since its known that government departments reherse some scenarios and have made plans to cope with them.

We knew at the end of Jan 2020 that we had a covid virus on the loose, it was rated at 3-4 times worse than a regular flu virus (the sort of thing that causes the NHS fits every winter) and that there was no natural immunity to it, and that there was no vaccine for it.

By mid-feb it was known to be here. via people bringing it in directly from China, or via 3rd countries such as Italy, Austria, France.

By March 1st lockdown should have been brought in to slow down the spread and give everyone a fighting chance at being able to cope with the surge in cases

yes it would have spread, but without access to sporting events, tube trains, train, offices, factories etc the virus could not have spread so fast, thus 'flattening the curve'

The travel ban would have been a no-brainer too, or at least quarantine for 7 days to make sure someone with the disease does not spread it.

Instead of which bozo the clown and his buddies decided that 'herd immunity' was the way to go....... with only bringing lockdown in just before April.

The lack of PPE in the NHS cant really be blamed on bozo(no matter how nice that feels) but due to the way the NHS operates in obtaining supplies (usually on a monthly J.I.T. type contract) with the result that if a hospital used 1000 operating gowns in a month, and then suddenly wanted 2000, they'd pay through the nose for the extra 1000... multiply that by masks etc, and then consider that manufacturers only have a limited ability to make the stuff (one company I know involved in making ventilator valve gear went from five 10 hour shifts per week to 24 hr running 6 days a week.)

The only success has been the vaccine program, largely I believe due that the government finally took their grubby hands off and let the adults run it.

Covid has been a disaster.... and would have been a disaster anyway, but it was made worse by a government that did'nt have a clue what to do, as was happy to throw money at the problem without looking where it was going

Hence a pub landlord getting a huge contract to supply PPE...........

And we must

relentlessly spy on our own citizens in order to stop russia/china/oceania

So no more encryption for the proles. and members of the outer party will have 2 way telescreens installed in every room.

And now... the 2 minute hate....

I see a lot of

hate for farcebork

The best way to charactorise it is as a pub with several billion people in it.

Into which are injected the screaming 'end is nigh' loonies (and other assorted nutters) that many pubs are inflicted with.

The way to enlightenment is education. to tell people that what you read on farcebork is not the truth.... and could well be a bunch of lies designed to make you vote for a particular loonatic (or party of them judging by the contents of the US republican party)

I've read one right wing nutjob (and thats the only phrase I can think of that fits them) claiming covid vaccinations r bad m'ok and that taking horse dewormer will keep you safe because vaccines are made by big pharma (horse dewormer is also made by big pharma but hey we're not into facts here).

Until people are educated to take the above with a decent skeptical eye, farcebork will remain the cesspool of mis-information that its always been

Me? I'll carry on using it as most of my friends are in the states /aussie and you seen the price of phone calls?

But what to do about it? make farcebork responsible for what is published on it, just as the regular printed press is (apart from weekly world news... that always carries the truth.. there IS a B-52 on the moon and Elvis is alive damnit!)

Wow

that will make a lot of difference to the cash stashed away in those OFFSHORE TAX HAVENS

Do something about those first, so that the billions stored away there can be properly taxed, and then distributed to the shareholders.

More cash for government + more cash for investors + more cash for pension funds = more cash circulating and therefore more economic activity as the money goes round and round the economy.

Unlike 'trickle down' where the rich just buy a bigger glass to stop anything spilling over and trickling....

We could'nt offer

Intel 8 billion quid for them to build the fabs here

The torys found out Intel wasn't a bank and therefore not worth bailing out.....

You will

enjoy your new windows 11 upgrade. whether you want your PC upgraded or not

Because once the initial bugs of the roll out have been tested on the beta users sorry those that have compatable computers, then the hardware requirements will be relaxed and the dialog will appear that says

"Do you want your computer upgraded to windows 11?"

And you click yes, it installs windows 11, you click no, it installs windows 11 , you click on the close dialog button, it installs windows 11. you use the task manager to shut down the dialog , it installs windows 11

And then your 7 million pound MRI scanner is rendered useless as the driver software was written for windows 10....

I have enough crap from windows 10 and playing the "hide the setting dialog" game the UI designers played without having to go through it all again.

Glad I run linux mint on the other PC... the one used for serious work and not games like my win10 box

I like

todays CNN story on what was leaked from farceborks HQ.

That their 'algorithm' is designed to look at what you've clicked before , then offer you more of the same in the hope you click on that too

Which explains why so many people are being led down the "anti-vaxxing/the left staged Jan 6th/ evil <insert todays hated minority> trying to take over the world' bollocks

and why after I searched for a washing machine , got 3 months of washing machine adverts......