Posts by Sarah Bee

Re: This really ISN'T the place for this discussion.

The IT angle is another sad victim of the economic downturn, stupid.

I was going to take pity on you and reject your comment, but I feel like having a Flamey Friday.

Re: Good to see Sarah Bee back

Aw. I do appreciate it, but I fear this is about my level - there's not much call for gig reviews here, and you could fill Brixton Academy with what I don't know about storage and security.

Re: Where's the IT angle?

It's up your bottom.

Re: Hope this is just short term

I just like the fact it is called a basho. Basho!

re: I don't know much about "art"...

Anything can be art. It's all in the context. You can explore anything you want to in whatever medium.

I think the BBFC will have to take care not to er, self-censor as the public is being pushed to do with extreme porn. But in this instance - I don't know, I'd have to see the film. Which I can't. But I could barely watch Audition, strong as my stomach is for that sort of thing. But I don't think that was beneath classification. Ah, I don't know. I'm tired.

Re: this entire thread and all who sail in it

Jesus meat-exchanging Christ.

Re: "shonky"?

It is a common word down our way.

Re: RE: @ law @Andus McCoatover

No, this discussion. I think all involved should go and have a bacon sandwich forthwith.

Re: RE: @ law @Andus McCoatover

Er... at what point should I be breaking this up?

Re: @ sarah

It's not that you're 'wrong'. You're just irritating. As far as I'm concerned you can do what you like without censure around me, including smoking, but as soon as that cloud hits my eyes or nose I will not be inclined to be your pal. I may indicate this by scowling at you. It should be fairly easy to work out why. How hard is it to just take that kind of criticism on the chin? You've got a silly and selfish habit that bothers people, you're going to have to roll with the punches.

Re: @ smokers are weak

Of course, now the weather has improved non-smokers who want to sit outside find it's like sitting in traffic behind a bus that needs servicing.

Yes, I know, we can't have it all ways. But I have to say, if smokers want any sympathy for being booted out into the cold they should consider being a little less dickish in their defensiveness. The fact that many of them (OK, many of you) seem almost gleeful about the effect their habit has on others - long-term health claims aside, it's undeniably unpleasant for others - doesn't exactly make people want to stick up for them. Because that sort of crowing makes you sound like a selfish arsehole.

Re: title

Wetherspoons don't play any music at all.

Smoking debate was unavoidable, and the 'let's not go there' was a feeble slap in the face of the inexorable. But anyway - you don't have to quit smoking to enjoy pubs if you don't like the standing-outside bit, you just have to develop sufficient willpower to go for an hour or two without sucking on your nicotine dummy. Or get an electronic cigarette. Those things are brill.

Feh.

Re: Smoking

There's a real easy solution to that one. But I suppose all that smoking has killed the necessary brain cells that might have enabled you to figure it out.

My coat is the coat that says on it 'Let's Not Go There'.

Re: The Best Cure For A Hangover...

Drink water between doses of booze. Then, have bacon sarnie to reward self for dodging hangover. Win/win.

Re: @Sarah Bee

Thanks David. Now we can all explore outer space together in peace for all eternity. (Yes, I've been reading 'Love All The People'.)

Re: Now they can cure the veggies

Yes. Since Gordon was having a little stab at satire/absurdism, there will be no execution today, nor a bollocking for me. I know it must look to you lot like these threads just unspool freely across the internet, but I am always here, ever (well, mostly) vigilant, sifting and considering and jumping on any unexploded hate-bombs. I'm not infallible by any means, but clearly that comment was not hateful. It was merely daft. An important distinction.

Re: Supply

>All dealers and users shouldnt go to prison but be sent off to some remote island 40 miles off shore away from the rest of us. Job done...

Thank you FlatSpot for that thoughtful and constructive comment.

this'n'that

Aw, you guys. Just a couple of things:

- Yes it was all planned. It was an entirely manufactured and manipulated self-parodic kind of hissyfit. (Sorry to disappoint the conspiracy theorist who surmised that the rant was real and the "ha ha, April Fool" was just an excuse. Although of course it's true there are a few rotten apples with views I er, can't get with, who do gross me out on occasion - just not very many, hearteningly.)

- Yes, the anti-semitic comment I rejected was real, over on Lewis's killdozer story. But this is one of the rules of the threads: Any story mentioning Israel and/or Palestine shall beget a thread bearing many dodgy things about Jews. (I'm not completely Jewish, tho, since it's matrilineal - just Jew*ish*. But whether I was or not I'd still nix the nastier comments because it's the thing to do. I nix the nastiest stuff about anyone or any group, as far as possible.)

- 'CVs' should not have an apostrophe - strictly speaking yes there are letters missing, but this does not cause the possible confusion which would necessitate a mark for clarification. In other words, it's obvious it's a plural.

I mean, I think it's allowed now to use one if you really think it's necessary, but it ain't proper, as far as I'm concerned.

- Sub-editing is half my job here - moderating is the other half. With the odd bit of writing whenever I manage to slip enough sedatives into Lester's tea. I don't moderate *all* the comments - the other sub does too, sometimes the writers here and there. I'm just the only one who stamps around shouting at people in the threads. Well, so far no one's told me not to...

- You really don't need to conclude that I'm a misandrist because I deplore some of the attitudes towards women on display here and there. It doesn't compute. If I'm ever roused to go "oi" then it's a specific beef, not a generalised swipe, and it's about the opinions and the individuals, not the gender at large. Misandrists hate men. I don't.

Besides, as should now be obvious, I don't always literally mean everything I say.

- There is still a distinct lack of shoes around here. And ears.

Re: nice one lol :O)

See, how could I possibly leave when there are such gems to be moderated?

Sigh.

Re: Dearie me.

Oh and of course - well done to the sceptical few who didn't buy it. Kudos. You win a thing.

Dearie me.

It's true - we *are* evil.

Before anyone cries post-midday-fool foul - this story was intended to be a sidelong fess-up. Obviously my esteemed colleague was a little too subtle, and rather than letting the cat out of the bag as was the idea, it seems only to have added more and more cats. Which we were then loath to disturb.

I can't say I haven't enjoyed and appreciated the accolades, sympathy, support, ears and increasingly outrageous offers, but I can't let you suffer any longer. It's actually been very touching, in all seriousness, and I feel a tiny bit mean. Only a tiny bit, mind.

So just to confirm, I'm not going anywhere, and it was all just larks. Although I'll happily take any shoe or spa vouchers going, and flowers are always welcome. I like lilies.

Happy April 1st, you 'orrible lot.

*cough*

I refer all honourable - and indeed all dishonourable - gentlemen thissaway:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/04/01/moderatrix_drama/comments/

April Fool, beeyatches. Oh, and dj (and some of the rest of you) - I may have been faking it back there, but you are *so* on my List. Give you enough rope, did I?

Seriously though, thank you for all the support, and apologies for stringing you along. But ooh, we did larf.

Right, fuck all this.

I'm sorry, but I'm done. Every day I come here and am obliged to wade through this never-ending fast-flowing stream of sub-misogynistic slurry. The torrent of literal-minded moronic crap I can just about bear - all the cringey "mines the one" 'jokes', the hysterical, pompous Orwell-referencing and pointless, interminable screeds and rants, yeah, I can tolerate it, despite the fact that babysitting you bunch of at best boring and at worst hateful swine is not something I signed up for. (I just had to nix some fucking anti-semite wanker suggesting that Hitler was right - oh, just kiss my Jewish arse.)

But I've actually reached the end of my patience when it comes to your unrepentent bigotry. Maybe I should feel sorry for you - clearly you don't have many women in your lives, or you'd know better than to belittle and disparage and yeah, on occasion abuse the entire gender at every opportunity. You know you do it. Look at yourselves. Those of you who have posted and been puzzled as to why your comments don't appear - think about why that might be, and the things you said that I had to read. The ones of you who have miraculously managed to con some unsuspecting girl into going out with you - well, I bet you'd be bloody ashamed if they saw the kind of things you say on here without a moment's thought. Or maybe you wouldn't. Either way, you disgust me.

So that's it. Absolutely and utterly fuck the lot of you. I've packed up my stuff and deleted my Reg email account. I don't have another job to go to, but I'd rather sign on than have to mop up your nasty, noxious crap for a minute longer.