* Posts by Christoph

3316 publicly visible posts • joined 24 Dec 2007

Nasa guides Mars Rover with Kinect

Christoph

Do you get to fire the Heat Ray?

We'll punish crims faster... with lots of shiny new tech - minister

Christoph
Holmes

"That has to be in the best interests of victims, prosecution and defence witnesses and all parties within the wider criminal justice system."

And how about the best interests of the accused? Do they still get time to find out what the prosecution case is, dig out the bits that the prosecution "forgot" to tell them about, and prepare the defence case?

US, Iraqi lawn chair balloonists blown out of sky

Christoph
Pint

Re: sad really

"What would you do if you were sat in the sun, drinking a bud"

Make bloody sure it was Budvar!

US deploys robot submarine armada against Iranian mines

Christoph

"at around $100,000 a unit it's an expensive way to clear obstacles"

Or: It's a profitable way to flog yet more weapons for yet another war.

Apple rejoins EPEAT green tech cert program

Christoph
Joke

Rejoining EPEAT

Does Rejoining EPEAT make it REPEAT?

'Extreme' solar storm speeding straight towards Earth

Christoph

Re: Power!

Storms and droughts have killed quite a few people. Massive crop failures will kill a lot more. Forced migration when the land can no longer support people, and the resultant wars, will kill huge numbers. Collapse of societies that depend on high tech farming to feed the current population will be very unpleasant indeed.

Carrington hit before extensive power systems, Tunguska hit an unpopulated wilderness. Carrington now would kill big numbers. Tunguska on a city would kill big numbers.

Christoph

Re: Power!

" unlike asteroids, and "global warming" "

The recent extreme weather in the UK and in the US is thought quite likely to be at least partly due to climate change - and look, it is possible to type phrase that without using scare quotes!

As for asteroids, Tunguska is more recent than Carrington.

NVIDIA Developer Zone, user forums plundered in hack attack

Christoph

(to clarify)

There's also an ID sent with each request and returned with the result so you know which request it's replying to.

Christoph
Boffin

There is only one way to stop passwords being stolen from a web server

The only way to be certain something can't be stolen from a web server is to not have it stored on that web server.

It is well past time that passwords were stored on a physically separate box. The server sends it a user name / password pair, and after a fixed time interval (to stop analysis attacks) the box sends back a 1 or a 0.

It would also need to accept new accounts and amended passwords. It would need very strict control of those of course. That must be designed in from the start so that no possible input value can compromise it.

It is not expensive to do this. For small systems it could be implemented on elderly kit running a pre-packaged Linux app, and for sites that have much more traffic they presumably have enough money for better kit. Sod it, you could run a lot of sites using a Raspberry Pi!

Expert: BA doesn't need permission to google your face

Christoph

Re: It won't be used to greet folks by name...

Damn right. If some total stranger puts on a blatantly fake plastic smile and greets me by name, they'll get the same treatment as the religious nutters who bang on my door and do fake 'friendly' greetings to try to make me feel uncomfortable in telling them to $%^& OFF.

50 years in SPAAAAACE: Telstar celebrates half-century since launch

Christoph

Wa

Wa Wa

Wa Waaa Wa-Wa Wa Wa

US networks: Political donations by text? Rlly nt a gud idea

Christoph

Can a big business put an app on all the company-issued phones that it makes all the employees carry, so that each phone makes a donation every month? Out of company funds, but not linked to the company.

Disappearing space dust belt baffles boffins

Christoph
Boffin

Space dust near a star is hot and black, so you can see it by infra-red.

Alternatively, it was scooped up by Hotblack Desiato for a Disaster Area concert.

Christoph
Alien

We were picking up waste heat

The local inhabitants have pointed the radiators on their power plant in a different direction.

Bill Gates: iPad is OK, but what Apple really needs is a SURFACE

Christoph
Devil

only "Surface-like devices"

So nobody would ever need 3-D, eh?

So, that vast IT disaster you may have caused? Come in, sit down

Christoph

Oops that should be: can't concentrate

Christoph

"The problems are being caused by him or her trying too hard"

With the boss standing right behind yelling "WHY ISN'T IT FIXED YET? HOW LONG IS IT GOING TO TAKE? THE CUSTOMERS CAN'T ACCESS THE SYSTEM! HURRY UP. AND GET IT FIXED! WHY ISN'T IT FIXED YET?

Odd that sometimes they can' concentrate properly.

Sussex bobbies get undisclosed tablets in networked-copper trials

Christoph

How soon before the tablets start to go missing? It's a very obvious target, if a plod is busy interviewing people there will be a queue of kids wanting to prove how cool they are by nicking his tablet while he's not looking.

And I wonder how well the tablets will survive Lewes Bonfire?

ICANN’s archery contest misses its target

Christoph
Joke

Digital Archery

So they tried to rob from the rich, and ended up not so much Robin Hood, more Dennis Moore.

Join the gov consultation on net porn ... and have your identity revealed

Christoph

Problem? What problem?

"It was the first the bureaucrats had heard of the problem"

Look, you're the fiftieth person we've told today, we've never heard of this problem before!

Ministers consult public on 'opt in for smut' plans

Christoph
Trollface

Excellent idea

Can we also have a public register of everyone who buys red-top newspapers with pictures of topless women? Obviously the government must act against the filthy pornographers who publish and sell those. Register every customer of every newsagent.

When is Murdoch going to start a campaign to have this done? Oh, wait ...

'Inexperienced' RBS tech operative's blunder led to banking meltdown

Christoph

Only one thing they can do

Only one way they can deal with the bank executives who got rid of all the experienced IT staff.

Increased bonuses all round!

MI5 boss: Cyber spies, web-enabled crooks threaten UK economy

Christoph
Black Helicopters

Be Afraid - and give us more powers

Yet another scare story, yet another request for increased powers and surveillance. And it's all the fault of those terrible foreigners who may be doing ... err ... exactly what we've been caught doing with Stuxnet and Flame.

LulzSec suspects plead guilty to DDoS attacks

Christoph

Re: A possible defense..

Eh? Of course they would, to stop their rivals scoring in the game.

Firefox 'new tab' feature exposes users' secured info: Fix promised

Christoph

It still stores the information

"Users can also switch back to using blank new tab screens by clicking the square icon in the top right corner of the browser. That will change the default preference to show a blank page, rather than the most visited websites when a new tab is opened."

But if you later click that icon again so the previews come back, it shows you pages that you browsed previously - i.e. the information was still stored. Presumably the same if you change the settings so the new tab doesn't appear.

One court order could gag EVERY ISP in Denmark

Christoph
Headmaster

Just how will this apply?

Will they confirm that the content is actually as claimed, or will they follow the current model of "It has the same title as our copyright work, therefore it is our copyright work".

Will they block major sites that use an individual's copyright photograph without asking?

Cable & Wireless Worldwide shareholders OK Vodafone takeover

Christoph
Flame

No wonder they could afford it

Vodafone have plenty of money for the takeover. After all they don't need to bother with trivial details like paying tax.

Google in dock again over defamatory auto-complete

Christoph

How is the autocomplete generated?

Is the autocomplete generated from phrases found in web pages? Or is it generated from lots of people searching on that phrase?

If the latter, then any defamation is by the people searching that term. And it would be possible to add an autocomplete for your least favourite politician by getting lots of people to search on the required phrase.

Christoph

Re: Do these idiots actually believe ...

It's possible. I'm the only person on the part of the planet that Google has indexed with my full name.

TSA screeners spooked by Apple's 'futuristic artifact'

Christoph

Re: Hlaváč - Poor Bastard

"all day long I'm inundated with rhetoric telling me the Republican Party is 'Small Government'. What gives?"

They only govern the little people, not big business.

Christoph
Alien

Got to be easier than travelling with a Hugo Award

The Hugo Award is a metal rocket ship, with fins. Pretty well certain to panic any screener who isn't an SF fan.

Facebook fesses up to Face.com face finder financing

Christoph

They are going to get an awful lot of photos tagged as "Guy Fawkes" from people wearing that mask.

Honour for Queen's IT manager

Christoph

Re: Maybe they should rename the Peter Principle

"And I bet still nobody listens to him."

Rubbish - the trees listen when he talks to them!

Outrageously old galaxy spied birthing new stars at furious rate

Christoph
Coat

ObQuote

Oh my God it's full of stars

Wraps come off UK super-snooper draft plans

Christoph

Re: No Content of communication - Not accurate

Some of the reports claim that they will only store the web site and not the individual page.

(What's the betting that will silently be changed at the earliest opportunity after the system is brought in?)

But that would presumably mean that if a web page shows an image that's sourced from alqaeda.org then anyone viewing that page will be recorded as visiting that site?

Christoph

I'm not sceptical about it at all. I'm bloody certain that it's deliberate.

Christoph
Joke

Trust me!

I'm from the government. I'm here to help you.

AU domains on security alert

Christoph

Their first mistake ...

... was to change to the .au extension from their original .oz

Finally a use for quantum computers: Finding LOL-cats faster

Christoph
Boffin

Next-generation ciphers

All very well switching new stuff to next-generation ciphers, but there's a problem that essentially all existing encrypted data will be easily crackable with quantum computers.

That's not too bad if you can re-encrypt all your stored data and every single one of the backups, but if it's ever got out on the web you've had it.

Sole British 'naut Major Tim embarks on NASA deep space mission

Christoph

Backronym

"NASA Extreme Environment Mission Operations (NEEMO) "

Someone must have really worked at getting that backronym!

Japan still in love with the fax

Christoph

Re: Fax.... machines?

"When they were first widely available, they were pretty much the only electrical bit of common office equipment."

Except the telex machines that they replaced.

Plus electric typewriters and dictaphones.

Rats with GPS backpacks prepare to sniff out landmines

Christoph

A better way?

Have the USA considered that a better way to eliminate landmines might be not to put the bloody things there in the first place?

And maybe even sign the treaty banning them?

Mr Sulu causes DDoS panic after posting link on Facebook

Christoph

What, they didn't make the obvious comment?

The Web Servers canna take it Captain!

Pint-size gizmo shoots X-RAY LASER for first time

Christoph

Just the thing we need ...

... to fire at anyone wanting to get on a plane in the USA. Well obviously we need to - that 5 year-old kid might be a terrorist, and the manufacturer's salesman assured us that there's no medical risk at all.

EU gives Google till July to offer fix for search dominance

Christoph
Holmes

You are guilty, please convict yourself

We've decided that you are guilty but we don't actually know what you've done that is wrong.

So we've decided to make you tell us what it is that you're doing wrong.

And if you refuse to tell us then that obviously proves that you are guilty

MPAA sympathetic to returning legitimate Megaupload files

Christoph
Flame

Wow, how generous

"The MPAA Members are sympathetic to legitimate users who may have relied on Megaupload to store their legitimately acquired or created data"

Gosh, that is *so* very generous of them. To actually consider graciously permitting innocent parties to access their own entirely legitimate data!

"If files are going to be handed back, then the MPAA needs to be sure that none of the material infringes copyright"

Why? It's their own data, it's none of the MPAA's business what it is. If they want to inspect it then they should show probable cause to a judge and get a warrant. And they can either get third parties to inspect it, or accept full liability if they are ever found to have later published something which might have been copied from that data. For instance suppose someone has a story idea in that data? If the MPAA seize and inspect that data then they had better never create anything based on that idea, whether or not they actually copied from it.

We'll pull the plug on info-leak smart meters, warns UK.gov

Christoph
Black Helicopters

What about write access?

Being able to read the data is bad enough, but what if it's possible to gain write access?

Will it be possible to switch off someone's electricity supply from anywhere in the world? (And then watch the supplier's bureaucracy take months to switch it back on again).

Next Chinese hacker scare story, they are going to switch off most of the households and businesses in the USA! So of course we need lots of extra powers to combat this.

Relax hackers! NATO has no cyber-attack plans - top brass

Christoph

And other objections

"There are huge political, legal and diplomatic objections,"

They hadn't noticed that there are also huge technical objections?

NHS fights record £325k ICO fine after clap records appear on eBay

Christoph

Asking for it

They locked up the drives for two years, then moved them somewhere else, then looked around for someone to sort them out? Hardly surprising that it went wrong.

If drives with extremely sensitive data were redundant and removed, they should have gone straight to secure destruction.

And surely an NHS region can find enough spare cash to get some gadget that can mangle a disk drive beyond the ability of anyone short of GCHQ to recover data from it.

US military gives NASA two better-than-Hubble telescopes

Christoph
Black Helicopters

OK, so these are surplus unlaunched scopes?

How many of this model were launched and are currently in orbit?

And why are these two surplus?

Either they no longer, without shuttle, have the ability to launch them - which means they know NASA certainly can't and the whole thing is a publicity stunt.

Or they are surplus because the US military now have something much better.