Problem: Kickstand!
The kickstand is an encapsulation of the problem with the Surface thingy. A nice traditional laptop has its screen attached nicely to the base where the keyboard is located, and it hinges nicely all by itself. This works out fine for a device sitting on your lap (thus the name!). The kickstand on the Surface thingy implies that it should rest on a desk of some sort, not up at a nice angle like a laptop screen. Even with the nice detachable keyboard, it doesn't balance well.
On the other hand, the iPad lies flat on a surface or can be held in your hand. Rarely is it propped up and used "desktop" style as the kickstand would have you do. So, the iPad (and its Android cousins) are of a different breed. They are meant to be "held", not "propped". As a previous commenter mentioned this makes them a "Consumer of information" product.
The "market" that Microsoft likes to sell into is the "Generator of information" segment, and a laptop is the device of choice here. It can sit on a desk, or it can be used as a lap device. The Surface goodie is a poor intimation of a laptop in this segment.
So, all the dancers in the world can't make it any better, as there are other devices that have better functionality (and probably at a cheaper price). My wife for one is (in my estimation) a "consumer" and the iPad suits her just fine. The times she actually uses a keyboard are for entering her mailing address/credit card number to buy something. She doesn't need/want the complexities of an attached keyboard and composing documents isn't there. Why bother with stuff more complex than it needs to be.
It seems as though Microsoft is trying to do what Microwave Oven makers are still trying to do: Add more and more useless features to a pretty basic device.