* Posts by Dex

117 publicly visible posts • joined 7 Dec 2007

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So, just what is the ultimate bacon sarnie?

Dex

Tons of smoked crisped-to-hell rashers in a garlic butter buttered roll with Primula chive squeezy cheese.....divine!

Microsoft dumps Metro from Windows 8

Dex

So obvious

They should have called it "Clippy's Revenge" and be done with it because, like Clippy, you want to kill it as viscerally and as quickly as possible.

Microsoft drops 'risky' Windows 8 preview on World

Dex
Holmes

Metro Controller gets rid of Metro easily enough

Metro Controller gets shot of all aspects of Metro, a simple google search for "metro controller" will easily return what you want.....

UK cops seek boffins to build handheld DNA sniffer kit

Dex
Trollface

Erm...

I believe it's called a magnifying glass!

Italy sues Microsoft for box-bundling bungling

Dex
Troll

I admit....

I misread the article, i didn't see the mention of laptops, only desktops but the point remains, if you don't like windows, buy a machine without it or just accept the fact Microsoft will take your money whether you want them too or not.

<troll> For those that want to switch off when they get home....take your machine to work and stop moaning :-) </troll>

Dex
Boffin

Hasn't all this....

...been tried before and gotten absolutely nowhere?

If you want a machine without Windows or MS crap.....build it your damn self, it's not friggin' hard!

Safety specs icons as some people STILL don't know how to build thier own machines

*Post made from a Windows machine for added irony*

Wi-Fi hack threat man pleads guilty

Dex
Alert

Whats the betting.....

.....the wireless network of the neighbour was unsecured and the papers are only saying it was secured to stop the victim look like an utter moron....

BlackBerry to Indian gov: Ban us, you have to ban Skype too

Dex
Alert

or....

just tell the governments to stop being nosey barstewarded and get forked!

If governments cant be open and transparent about thier dealings then why the hell should RIM?

Reg hack tickled by Kent schoolgirl

Dex

Re: Fame, Glory and what follows!

Humiliation more like :/ i mean you just HAD to pick Lester to compare Justin Bieber to :O

Paedo-bear icon needed!

Reg Hardware Reader Awards 2010

Dex
Thumb Up

Portal

How can you not? :)

New owner slips into unwitting BoJo's domain

Dex
Boffin

.bs - already taken

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/.bs

Bahamas

Calls for US nudie perv scanner 'opt-out day'

Dex
Boffin

erm...

Lead clothing anyone?

BOFH: Join the club

Dex
Pint

I'm with...

Maverick! Love the DNF FINALLY being real reference :)

You can always count on the T!

Ten... bedside iPod docks

Dex
Megaphone

Turn out the lights....

....of course, you can turn the light off on all the units.......just launch it across the room! screw the snooze!

'HULC™' robot exoskeleton war-walker suit 'at gen 2.0'

Dex
Pint

Finally....

....A device that can get you home when pissed, not only get you home but get you home UPRIGHT!

HUZZAH!!

Microsoft opens online PC gaming shop-front

Dex
FAIL

Interestingly...

"Valve originally approached several companies—including Microsoft, Yahoo!, and RealNetworks—to build a client with these features, but all turned them down.[38]"

[38] - http://www.gamesindustry.biz/articles/the-last-of-the-independents

{Excerpt from STEAM wikipedia entry.}

Microsoft fail much?

Dex
Flame

erm....

Steam, Direct2Drive.....i think Microsoft are only erm 7 years (Steam) & 6 years (Direct2Drive) late, If only they'd taken PC Gamers seriously instead of trying to whore up the already saturated console market *sigh*

Unless they can drastically undercut Steam (Direct2Drive aren't even worth the money tbh, Steam does it so much better) then i won't be using them.

They could call it STEAMing (pile of shite)......oh wait....Valve might has that trademark registered.

Flame Icon = Hot Air = STEAM ftw!

Dead baby taunting troll feels wrath of law

Dex
Flame

Maybe i'm lost here but...

surely i'm poking fun at dead people for whatever reason then i am not causing offence to that person as said person can not voice such an opinion to say i am offending them? Their relatives can sure, but my comments wouldn't be directed at them but at the deceased and so a judge wouldn't be able to say that if offends the person it relates to as said person can't actually answer back (for obvious reasons)

not that i'm a troll or anything it just seems a bit....stupid (the legislation i mean)

Capgemini pushes efficiency limits in Swindon data centre

Dex
Thumb Up

Swindon!

I slide my server in your server-rack last night

I threw me cheeteos at your PFY to keep quiet

Now something's telling me that he's avoiding me,

Come on now BOFH,

You got something i need.

I got a brand new data cent'r and i'll give you the key,

Come get all your rackspace needs from my farming friends 'n' me.

i got 20 servers and you got 43

Now I got a brand new data cent'r and i'll give you the key,

'We Want Two' Navy carrier plan pondered by Cabinet

Dex

Is it just me.....

....but since when did sending flaming rubble...sorry ships...towards the enemy not stop them attacking?[Spanish Inquis.....Armada sorry] just modernise the strategy, send nuclear ships verging meltdown towards them instead....instead of the threat of fire/flaming ships, we use nuclear/fallout riddled ships.

Alternatively build 3 carriers and multi-purpose them [or build in modular format] so it can be universally used.

:-)

BlackBerry tablet boots from 'floppy disk OS'

Dex
Thumb Up

Munter =/= Minger+1

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=munter

Although why they couldn't just add 2G to it is beyond me, i mean it would eliminate the need to have this plus a blackberry or maybe that's the plan o_0

RIM - All your devices are belong to us!

Cops taser Somerset chap's nether regions

Dex
Boffin

Just....

make your clothes out of the anti-static bags your RAM etc comes in after-all it is a mini-faraday cage.

Next time you get a taser to the nuts it'll just dissipate

What's the difference between an iPod and an iPood?

Dex
Coat

I smell bullsh....

....Mine's the one with the poop-a-scoop in.

Our Vulture 1 aircraft begins to take shape

Dex
Troll

I....

second this suggestion! To boldly go where no playmobil has gone before! just make sure you factor in the little dude(tte)'s weight!

Troll as there is no playmobil icon...fix it!

The Register comment guidelines 2010

Dex
Welcome

I for one....

..welcome the addition of user profiles to El Reg, i mean we are, after-all, one big happy family, It'd be nice to know even the most trival things about fellow commentards.....i mean users :-), location, alcoholic preference, OS of choice, favorite BOFH episode etc etc

Stats would also be nice. most used topic icon, most popular comment etc :-)

Blighty's stealth robojet rolls out a year late

Dex
Thumb Up

I...

WANT!

Anyone see the proggy on C4 about Concorde last night? Yes i know it's not going to fly again and yes it was expensive to run but damn, if i had a couple of mil i'm my back pocket i'd buy one, get it airworthy again just to have my own PERSONAL concorde, Bet Richard Branston Pickle doesn't have his own personal Concorde does he? Sure he's got an ISP, Airline and rail company but his own personal Concorde? i think not!

Blizzard exposes real names on WoW forums

Dex
Joke

On the upside...

.....It'll help the WoW addict support groups

BOFH: Risky business

Dex
Alert

You....

.....forgot the quicklime!

Getting women's phone numbers a matter of mood music

Dex
Megaphone

Real men....

.....Don't shop in PC World ;) although that Intel Jingle is catchy....and now for something completly different: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8748854.stm

megaphone =/= sonic branding...el reg style

.XXX accuses ICANN of 'lip service' on porn domain

Dex
Joke

A better TLD would be....

.wtf for all the weird crap you see on the web, not just warped sexual content but content in general :-)

Ten free apps to install on every new PC

Dex
Alert

WinAMP instead of iTunes

Enough said there! It'll even do your iPod too :D

Hard drives cop flak from .50 cal incendiary round

Dex
Alert

Personally i'd rather.....

How many SD cards will stop sharks armed with frikkin' lasers?

Two convicted for refusal to decrypt data

Dex
FAIL

You don't have....

.....the right to remain silent it seems

12 of the best... travel gadgets

Dex
Coat

"You call that a knife......"

"THIS is a knife...." "...it's a USB stick"

Think Simpsons.....

Powered robot suits make debut on Tokyo streets

Dex
Welcome

A title is required

i for one welcome our robotically limb-assisted overlords.......beats killer zimmerframes anyday

Smut page ransomware Trojan ransacks browsers

Dex
Alert

Begs the question....

....If thier screenshot is to be believed and that Firefox shows "Informer" in the Extentions list (saying it's not compatible)...whats to stop the user removing it that way [via the extentions list] and not pay?

Engineer commits suicide after losing iPhone prototype

Dex
FAIL

Erm

Foxconn doing the iPhone? lets hope it's not like thier mobo's.....shite to put it lightly :-)

US tactical bot has no taste for humans

Dex
Welcome

I....

for one welcome our vegetarian eating carnivorious canniballistic overlords......Lets hope they have common sense and eat all the vegetarians first

Tattooed Swedish devil girls sexually molest cyclist

Dex
Heart

Me.....

like pie ^_^

California skateboard dude swipes Reg logo

Dex
Alert

Send over...

The sharks armed with frickkin' lasers already :P

NHS Direct gets to be number one, one, one

Dex
Boffin

Surely.....

647 (N-H-S) would be more logical? virtually all phones have letters about the numbers (mobile definately nad some most payphones) so it's easy to spell out N-H-S (647)

Ukraine slaps ban on all porn

Dex
Paris Hilton

Spem Banks.....

.....now classed as medical research facilities then?

Paris...I'm sure they've got plenty of her material on tape

Web browser makers line up battleships

Dex
Gates Horns

Stilll....

....Trying to pull an Apple and push it out with EVERY windows update, labelling it as "Important" along with shittylight......i mean Silverlight

FF FTW

Police headcams burst into flames

Dex
Joke

Erm....

.....Smokey bacon anyone?

Mines the one with the pack of Walkers in the pocket

BOFH: A spot of bother

Dex
Pint

Ahhh...

on the same day i get my net back....Virgin i'm looking at you....We get BOFH too.....Must be God's Work

Glasgow unbans Life of Brian

Dex
Badgers

On that note.....

....Where is the Moderatrix? Not seen her in ages, Has she realised she will NEVER tame the ravid males of El Reg + Vulture Central?

Badgers....Vag badger....Moderatrix....ok maybe it should be my coat

:D

Pirate Bay sells out to Swedish software firm for $7.7m

Dex
Megaphone

end of an era maybe..

but there AREother torrent engines, userbase will move to those till if ever tpb comes bback

Boffins: Gigantic crustacean sperm is 'viable strategy'

Dex
Joke

So this is....

....wher the Scary Movie sketch "cums" from...although somehow i think she'd go THROUGH the ceiling, not get stuck to it

Steve Jobs had liver transplant

Dex
Coat

48 day waiting list in Tennesse?

Must be all the Jack Daniels......

...mines the one with the hipflask in the pocket

Game laws to make underage selling illegal

Dex
Flame

How about.....

....The BBFC just get bent! Parents WILL buy titles for thier kids regardless of the cert if the kid nags them enough so here's an idea:

ABANDON THE AGE RATINGS SYSTEM.....We're in this thing called the 21st Century......violence, strong language, sex, alcohol and drugs are EVERYWHERE so rather than fight it just let it be there.

Punish those that have done wrong (rapists, killers and whatnot) with a PROPER legal system and stop trying to find excuses for you not doing YOUR JOB in the first place, Sure you can argue "video games are bad" but to quote a very good friend of mine:

"Controversy and the games industry go hand in hand like Ico and Yorda, if you'll forgive the incredibly nerdy analogy, and like Yorda, the controversy tends to stay focused for an average of about 8 nanoseconds before getting bored and drifting off to do something else. But when it does get focused, it can get very exasperating, such as when youthful paragons of self-control are called nasty names, and decide that murder would be the wittiest comeback, and then is found to have stood next to a video game at some point in the past. Then the media generally start drooling the usual uninformed questions as to whether wholesome boyish pretend violence has any correlation with the real world. Short answer: No. Long answer: No, and go fuck yourselves, you ignorant scare-mongering cockbags."

In summary: Abandon game and movies ratings and get a (set of) balls/spine and spend the money on PROPER policing, not nannying!

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